The Tale of Mr. Lettuce

by | Jun 10, 2025 | Environment, Food & Drink, Hygiene, KHAAAAAANNN!!!, LifeSkills, Musings | 256 comments

Long ago I shared an apartment with a friend and his girlfriend. One of us bought a head of lettuce. As will happen sometimes, the shopping trip turned out to be more focused on healthy eating than the later food preparation step, so the head of lettuce languished in the crisper drawer. Soon the crisper drawer revealed its limits and Mr. Lettuce became less than crisp.

An ongoing argument about whose turn it was to clean out the fridge became a feature of our lives. Time passed, the crisper drawer became a taboo subject, and a faintly vinegary smell appeared in the kitchen. More time passed and a deal was struck. The girlfriend would clean the fridge because she was unemployed. The girlfriend ‘cleaned the fridge’ but somehow missed the crisper drawer.

Mr. Lettuce continued his evolution toward sentience. More time passed, now filled with recriminations, and an increasing focus on take-out and delivery food. The vinegary smell entered puberty and developed, as things in adolescence do, becoming moody and unpleasant, capable of ruining any social occasion with its presence.

Finally, an open fight broke out, the girlfriend insisted that the drawer be cleared, but refused to do the clearance.  A deal was struck and my friend and I approached the fridge together. The drawer was opened and Mr. Lettuce made his stage debut.  It was an overpowering performance, some combination of lettuce, plastic bag, controlled humidity and temperature, had produced a truly potent player.

Mr. Lettuce was hard to describe accurately; his color partook of black, brown, and green without being a recognizable shade of any; his texture was reminiscent of drowned corpses, and his odor, now unconfined, had matured, like a fine wine it had developed complexities and overtones never present in the original plant matter.  It permeated the apartment; it lingered in our clothing; it caused comment from the neighbors. The trip out to the trash bin would have struck an observer as odd, if any observer had been willing to remain in the presence of Mr. Lettuce’s smell debut.  It was a strangely formal sight, two grown men bearing between them a small plastic sack full of goo, proceeding rapidly, but with care not to spill Mr. Lettuce, toward his final resting place, pallbearers to salad.

About The Author

(((Jarflax

(((Jarflax

Lawyer, gamer, curmudgeon

256 Comments

  1. Festus

    “It’s Alive! Alive!”

    • Festus

      “It’s Alive! Alive!”

      • Chafed

        Alright, alright, alright

  2. Festus

    That was odd. Thanks to TPTB for remedying the situation.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      It is good, wassup?

  3. PieInTheSky

    testing 5 90 234

  4. PieInTheSky

    The girlfriend would clean the fridge because she was unemployed – she’s a chick should have been enough to get cleaning duties.

    I may be weird but I never have rotting things in the fridge

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Not my fridge, not my rotties

  5. Festus

    That was a fine tale, Jarflax. Did girlfriend ever breach the topic of a “chore wheel”? That’s usually the harbinger of doom for those sorts of domestic arrangements.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Chore wheel sounds like a sexy assignment, where Q?

    • Jarflax

      Nah, we mostly worked things out by getting really annoyed at each other and being petty. This was when I was 20-21 and I was the older one.

  6. Yusef drives a Kia

    Downtown LA is under curfew right now, but LA is huge, DT is nothing

  7. Yusef drives a Kia

    Festus, I called you

  8. Suthenboy

    huh. Good morning all.
    I was beginning to think this site got 86’ed.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      It was down, no reason

      • Sean

        Trump’s fault. Duh.

    • bacon-magic

      You can’t shut us up 3 letter boys!

  9. Suthenboy

    I keep a fairly close eye on the rotter in our fridge. Start looking wilty…it’s gone.

  10. Suthenboy

    This riot business is beyond absurd. It is all theater with both sides playing a scripted part and the media of course using the same playbook.
    I dont really take any of it seriously.

    Just curious…has anyone seen or heard from the rioters? One interview? Amazing how incurious the media are about who these people are and what they want. They are just two dimensional cut-out rioters playing the part and dressing for the role for maximum outrage. For the ones being arrested…what are their names? Mugshots? Profiles?
    Who is funding all of this? Aside from vague suggestions I dont see anyone nailing it down. I do see the dem pols defending it but they are also two dimensional characters dryly reading from a script…very unconvincingly.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Its nothing but hype, its only in the big cites and its designed to cause strife, ignore it.

      • Beau Knott

        HWFO provides some support for this view, with numbers.

    • Ted S.

      Welcome back!

    • Gender Traitor

      Good morning, Sean, Ted’S., U, and Beau (and maybe still Yusef and Suthen?)

      • Gender Traitor

        And, of course, profuse thanks to WebDom and any other of TPTB who went above and beyond to resurrect the site (including Tonio for the reassuring email update!)

      • Fourscore

        I had to resort to the local Glibs for early confirmation. Ever tried getting an info out of libertarian?

        “I ain’t sayin’ nothin’ ”

        “My lawyer will call you”

        “Check the thermostat”

        Then it went down hill.

      • Gender Traitor

        How are you, U? Better than yesterday, I hope? 🙂

      • Gender Traitor

        And a lovely good morning to you, 4(20)!

      • UnCivilServant

        Venting here acts as a bit of pressure release valve. Other people I could rant at wouldn’t put up with it.

        I’m wondering if my knee pain is a result of the height of my chair after the last repair. I think it’s a smidge too high, but I can’t set it any lower. It would explain why I hurt at home, but did not suffer from it when visiting my mother and sat in other chairs.

        But, I need to do that cleaning I complained about not having finished before I can take the chair apart and make changes to it.

      • Fourscore

        Mornin’ GT and any of the rest that couldn’t face the day.

      • Gender Traitor

        Your theory about the chair height as the potential cause of your knee pain sounds plausible, especially since your knees didn’t bother you when sitting elsewhere. Until you can adjust the chair, can you maybe raise your feet slightly when sitting – perhaps just a couple of inches? (Got any thickish books that turned out to be disappointing reading?)

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Shoot it right into my veins.
      *posts comment*

      Ahhhh, that’s the stuff…

  11. Sean

    DEPORT THEM ALL!

    • PieInTheSky

      EXCEPT THE HOT CHICKS

      • Chafed

        Pie has a point.

      • UnCivilServant

        Ze Rules are Ze Rules are Ze Rules.

    • Fourscore

      Good thing there isn’t a law on being ugly, she’d be sharing a Merle Haggard, …doing life without parole…

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        She will be much more than 21 in prison…

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Nothing beats the rush of hassling large wild animals while armed with nothing but a camera.

    • Ted S.

      Like in the Lexus December to Remember commercials?

      No.

      • Fourscore

        My truck is old enough to vote. I’m not changing anything, not even the oil.

      • Ted S.

        So your truck is Onescore?

    • Sensei

      My understanding is you need to unwrap it after 5 years or so or it will not come off cleanly and has a high chance of wrecking the paint.

    • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

      I drove a work car that had been wrapped. After a couple years the wrapping starts to fray at the edges, and then really quickly looks like shit.

  12. UnCivilServant

    @Not Adahn – As I was going to say when I got cut off by technical difficulties – If I can get my optic mounted (turns out the guy at SWAT was wrong, the optic doesn’t fit and requires an adapter), I want to test my magazines at a normal target shoot. If I can get both of those done this week (adapter is ordered but not yet delivered, will use mag test to zero the dot), I will sign up for the practice monday. I have not fired a single round through the Shadow yet.

    • Not Adahn

      Ok. I have three different grips for you to try. I think you might like the “veloce.” It’s extremely popular — grippy without being pointy. It’s not my choice because of the thickness were the web of my hand goes.

  13. UnCivilServant

    Warning – Times Union is riddled with hostile web design.

    A random nugget of sanity. So instead of having to wedge the gas cap under the handle, the otherwise ubiquitious hands free fuelling lever might become available in New York.

    • Fourscore

      Welcome to the 21st Century, New York!

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Wedging the gas cap is what people do to get around it? Heh, the unintended consequences of stupid laws.

      • UnCivilServant

        It’s at hand and you have to move it to get the nozzle in anyway.

    • Sensei

      There are some 3D models available to print.

      I wouldn’t know as I’m not qualified to pump my own gas in NJ.

      • juris imprudent

        You would think there would be a license involved with that.

  14. Not Adahn

    I missed you guys.

    There, I said it.

    • UnCivilServant

      🤔 Which joke to go with…?

      “I thought your aim was better than that.”

      “You might change your mind later”

      …?

      • Ted S.

        “I didn’t notice you were gone”

      • UnCivilServant

        That’s just mean-spirited, man.

  15. Tres Cool

    /puts pipe to mouth
    /lights torch
    /inhales and freebases Glibs

    • Grumbletarian

      I too missed this oasis of sanity. Good morning, all.

      • Beau Knott

        +1

      • cavalier973

        I even missed the less sane parts.

        One of my favorite podcasts—a D&D play cast—went political yesterday, so I abandoned it.

        I believe in separation of D&D and State.

        If they had gone the *other* way in their opinions, I, of course, wouldn’t have minded so much.

    • Ted S.

      You had to spend time with a petite woman yesterday?

    • Chafed

      What an idiot.

    • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

      Oh, Canada, were the men are women, and the ambulance drivers still wear masks.

    • UnCivilServant

      Medina-Perez, who was barred from re-entering the U.S. until 2027, was in court on drug possession charges and a fugitive warrant from Pennsylvania

      So, what is he accused of doing in Pennsylvania?

      • cavalier973

        He was passing our ivermectin.

    • Ted S.

      One of last night’s Jeopardy contestants was a guy who got thrown out of Taiwan for screwing up his departure time by two hours. (He claimed to have his boarding pass in hand when he was stopped; I’d guess from the folks at the airport spotting the discrepancy.)

      Taiwan stamped his passport that he was banned from entering for one year.

  16. PieInTheSky

    Now that the site is back can we complaint that the links are late?

    • Sean

      OFC

  17. Common Tater

    *taps microphone*

    • PieInTheSky

      stop that

      • Common Tater

        *goochy goochy*

    • UnCivilServant

      Look, the instructions were to tap the Telephone.

      sheesh.

  18. Common Tater

    Nature is healing. Both Elon and Simone apologized.

      • Common Tater

        Elon Musk is some guy who bought Twitter.

      • Not Adahn

        Jackie Kennedy’s hat designer I think.

      • UnCivilServant

        Not that kid Clinton deported to Cuba at gunpoint?

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        That was Oleg, NA. Not Elon.

    • Chafed

      Idiot

    • Suthenboy

      How much are those people getting paid? And who does that guy’s wardrobe?

      • Sean

        This was actually an anti-immigration protester in Plymouth, England.

        Per the comments. I just found it very amusing.

  19. Nephilium

    Scheduling may be a bit… lax… for today as we’re just now able to access the site again to do things like update posts and schedule them.

    While we appreciate your patience, we’re also aware you didn’t really have a choice. Thank you for choosing Glibs for your shared kvetching about life in general.

      • Ted S.

        We expect it from you. It’s part of what makes Glibertarians charming.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        Grousing is only for southern woodsmen.

      • Jarflax

        Grouse season runs from late September through February in New York, poacher!

      • UnCivilServant

        🤔… Poached Grouse…

        😋

      • UnCivilServant

        Now I’ve got to go and find some grouse to poach. And make sure I’ve got the right pan. I know I used to, but I haven’t seen it in a while.

      • Jarflax

        Poached in whine?

      • bacon-magic

        When is Snipe season?

    • Not Adahn

      I have a link Animal might appreciate. I’m waiting until next post +0.5h.

    • Ted S.

      Thank you for pro-rating my Gold Class membership fee after the outage.

      • Nephilium

        Oh… I’m sorry. That was only for full on outages. As there were HTTP responses being generated by the web server and received by the remote web browsers, that shows that the site was not technically down. We’re sorry, your request for a credit has been denied.

    • R.J.

      I shall have a special movie post this week celebrating the indestructible spirit of Glibertarians.com. Should be submitted in another hour.
      In no way did I take advantage of this opportunity to be lax myself.

    • UnCivilServant

      I get the pepper spray and arrest, but was the hair pull strictly necessary?

      • Sean

        Absolutely.

      • Nephilium

        They paid extra for the hair pull.

  20. Common Tater

    “The Los Angeles riots took an ominous turn on Monday night as a mystery donor was seen dropping off tactical war-time face shields for protesters in a sign that the chaos is nowhere near over.

    The mystery donor was caught on camera passing out gas masks and riot shields from her Ford F-150 to protesters in the streets as the National Guard was stationed nearby.”

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-14797673/la-riots-live-updates-2025-trump-cause-protest-ice-marines.html

    Uvex Bionic Shields are around $40 each.

    • Common Tater

      “LOS ANGELES — Leftwing nonprofit groups are openly helping to fuel anti-ICE riots here by handing out “F–k ICE” packs with protective equipment — as protesters continue to take over downtown every night and engage in rolling battles with cops, federal agents and National Guard troops.

      Chilling footage revealed one unidentified group handing out a truckload of face shields and other riot gear to protesters in downtown Los Angeles.

      The “F–k ICE” packages — which include goggles, facemasks, gloves and a phone number for “jail support” — are being assembled and distributed by a nonprofit called Operation Healthy Hearts.”

      https://nypost.com/2025/06/10/us-news/lefty-nonprofits-are-openly-fueling-la-riots-by-handing-out-f-k-ice-protective-gear/

      • rhywun

        This whole thing was started by, funded by, and operated by commies. You can tell because some of them forget to switch out their keffiyehs for Mexican flags.

        Any “asylum seeker” hangers on are just incidental.

    • Not Adahn

      That’s what I wear in the lab. The idea that it’s “tactical” is a bit risible. It does have a decent splash rating* so you can wear it with safety glasses instead of goggles.

      *The testing procedure for splash rating is kind of hilaristupid. They put the face shield on a foam head, throw a cup of dyed liquid at it, and see how much got on the face.

      • UnCivilServant

        If you were designing a splash test for a face mask, what would you do differently?

        Not meant as sarcasm, just curiousity. I haven’t given the issue much thought.

      • Not Adahn

        The first thing I would do would be to standardize the rate and directionality of the liquid delivery system.

        As opposed to “dude throws a cup.”

      • UnCivilServant

        I’ve already got a mental mock up of a nozzle on a pneumatically actuated piston fillable via a check valve on the nozzle end. With the same air pressure and fluid volume you should get consistant dispersals.

      • Not Adahn

        See? Obvious room for improvement!

    • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

      I am surprised they don’t use COVID masks.

      Those will stop anything and everything!

      • The Last American Hero

        As we learned in 2020, you don’t wear COVID masks when protesting.

  21. Common Tater

    ““I’m still unsure whether we technically broke an immigration law. The border between Canada and the United States was pretty porous (as it is today, for the most part). But either way, since I came here without legal documentation, I eventually fell into the category of being an undocumented immigrant,” he wrote.”

    https://nypost.com/2025/06/11/us-news/snarky-fashion-influencer-who-regularly-mocks-trump-vances-outfits-admits-hes-in-us-illegally-dhs-responds/

    These things happen.

    • UnCivilServant

      Go home and avail yourself of Canadian healthcare.

  22. Fourscore

    Today I’m half of a dead man’s hand.

    The missus was gonna light the candles ’til I reminded her that last year the local fire department showed up. I had to give both guys a piece of cake to get them to leave.

    • UnCivilServant

      Today I’m half of a dead man’s hand.

      Two aces?

      /willfully obtuse.

      Happy Birthday.

      • Ted S.

        No, Dr. Orlac.

    • Ted S.

      She should get those giant number candles.

      I did that several years ago for my dad’s birthday and the cashier asked, “79 or 97?”

      • Ted S.

        The other benefit is that those candles are great if your eyesight is getting worse. 🙂

      • Fourscore

        I’ll split the difference…

    • Sean

      Happy birthday!

    • Common Tater

      HBD 🙂

    • R.J.

      Happy birthday to the only guy I can’t call a whippersnapper!

      • Ted S.

        You’re older than OMWC?

      • Fourscore

        OMWC, that kid!

    • PutridMeat

      Happy 18th birthday, fourscore.

      • Ted S.

        He’s a Jack Benny 39.

    • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

      Happy birthday, sir.

    • The Other Kevin

      Happy birthday! We are lucky to have you here. Hope you have a great day.

    • bacon-magic

      Happy birthday!

    • Gender Traitor

      So, happy birthday…4(22)?

  23. Common Tater

    “A United States Department of Justice employee secretly spiked his pregnant girlfriend’s drink with an abortion drug to induce a miscarriage without her knowledge, according to cops.

    Justin Anthony Banta, 38, who works in the IT department of the DOJ, is charged with capital murder in Parker County, Texas, for allegedly putting “Plan C” abortion drugs in his pregnant girlfriend’s coffee, the sheriff’s office said in a statement….

    The following day the woman went to the emergency room with extreme bleeding and lost the pregnancy, later reporting the incident to police.”

    https://nypost.com/2025/06/10/us-news/doj-employee-spiked-happily-pregnant-girlfriends-coffee-with-abortion-pills-sheriff/

    CWAA

    • Not Adahn

      Don’t tell his heart, his achy-breaky heart.

  24. Jarflax

    Also, does anyone know what Winston’s Mom was up to that killed the site yesterday?

    • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

      Dunno, but Tonio will grin and bear it.

    • Nephilium

      We can’t exactly talk about it on a family friendly website…

  25. trshmnstr

    I found a half loaf of sourdough yesterday that had been sitting in the breadbox since mid-may. To say that golden brown wasn’t its primary color anymore would be an understatement.

    • UnCivilServant

      White? Blue? Green? Black? Piebald?

      • trshmnstr

        Many of the above, and fuzzy.

      • R.J.

        Trashy listens closely to the bread and hears:
        “NO KILL I…”

      • Ted S.

        Clear.

  26. Sensei

    Ford is doomed. It would appear they want to again be an assembler of Tier 1 supplier components into vehicles.

    “I think powertrains — ICE powertrains over time are going to need to consolidate, and they’re not going to be differentiated. I don’t think that consumers really think about powertrains the way they did 30 years ago, where it defined what a vehicle was, the horsepower, the displacement, the torque and everything about the vehicle, I think a lot of that is gone. And so does everybody need to develop the next 4-cylinder and 6- cylinder as that arc comes?”

    As vice chair, Lawler’s responsibilities include a focus on strategy, partnerships, and alliances, according to the automaker. That he means his comments may preview the Blue Oval’s long term plans to rely on outside companies for engines and transmissions.

    https://fordauthority.com/2025/06/ford-exec-says-customers-stopped-caring-about-powertrains/

    https://fordauthority.com/2025/06/ford-exec-says-customers-stopped-caring-about-powertrains/

    • R.J.

      When the new Bronco rolled out with just a 4 cylinder turbo it really turned me off. At least give it a naturally aspirated 6 as an option. Ford had a great 6 until just recently. So that guy is full of it.

      • Sensei

        They’ve mentioned they want to keep the V8 going as long as FedGov allows and the public wants.

        Perhaps they will pay attention to the Stellantis debacle.

      • R.J.

        Ford reminds me of republicans. They are experts and shooting their own feet off.

    • Sean

      That dude sounds lazy and out of touch with actual consumers who can afford new vehicles.

      • Sensei

        His customer is Wall St.

    • Grumbletarian

      I refused to even look at the new Rangers until I could get a 6-cyl without buying a Raptor. Now that i can get one in an XLT or Lariat, I’m keeping an eye out for deals.

    • The Last American Hero

      Four or Six Cylinders?

      Turbo 3 or 5 is where the next gen is heading.

  27. Suthenboy

    In spite of what I said earlier I have discovered three kiwis in a plastic bag that have been hiding in the rotter for a while and they have become liquid.

    • Jarflax

      Shame they gave up their guns, but that’s what you get.

  28. The Late P Brooks

    Martyr to the truth

    Robby Soave, senior editor of the libertarian Reason magazine, called Leavitt’s actions “censorship adjacent.” He wrote that the White House press secretary is “trying to pressure ABC News to censor Terry Moran over his (admittedly a bit questionable) tweet.”

    Moran’s post and the controversy that subsequently surrounded it took colleagues by surprise. In his time at ABC, Moran was considered careful in his reporting and measured in his analysis. If anything, Moran was thought to be more conservative and more willing to outwardly acknowledge his religious faith than many peers, according to three former colleagues at ABC. (They asked for anonymity to speak given the sensitivity surrounding Moran’s ouster by the network.)

    ABC did suspend Moran over the weekend but by Tuesday concluded that – despite his 28 years at the network — he could not return.

    Maybe he can get picked up off the waiver wire by MSNBC.

    • The Last American Hero

      Given the journolistic malpractice that the networks have been practicing for decades, cry me a fucking river.

    • bacon-magic

      Fruit Sushi learn to change a tire yet?

  29. Not Adahn

    Not my game, not my price point, but so incredibly beautiful that I become physically ill as the foul humours are driven from my body:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVybxn6CPvI

    at 5:51- 6:09 brief NSFW as the requested engraving is more drug dealer than aristocratic sportsman.

    at 11:57 is a side-by-side the same color as Hotblack Desatio’s hyperlimo.

      • Not Adahn

        Who would be in a position to even know?

        PB is what, 300 years older than H&H? I don’t know if that means anything though.

      • Not Adahn

        Watching that video, Beretta brags about there being no welds on their hand made guns. H&H video spends more than two minutes showing welding. No idea if that really matters.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        Beretta is the oldest gunmaker in the world, it is known. H&H is a relative newcomer, it is true.

        But, by god are they beautiful.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        That isn’t welding, it is brazing and soldering.

        And that is why you cannot hot blue a good shotgun, you have to rust blue them.

      • R C Dean

        *strokes 1301, whispers “don’t you listen to the mean ZWAK”*

      • Not Adahn

        Needed more beauty shots of the finished product. The English engraving was definitely more tasteful. Not a boob to be seen.

        The Beretta ebony-stocked gun made me feel funny in my no-no place.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        Well, now we know what porn category Not A chooses.

        “Ebony…”

        Personally, I like more figure to spice up my wood.

      • Not Adahn

        You like ’em “full figured” huh? You and tres.

      • Ted S.

        Don’t know if I want a Hat and the Hair gun.

      • Grummun

        H&H video spends more than two minutes showing welding.

        Pretty sure that’s not welding, but silver soldering.

  30. The Late P Brooks

    I don’t think that consumers really think about powertrains the way they did 30 years ago

    And yet the manufacturers seem to be no less obsessed with engine output than they were in the ’60s.

    • Sensei

      Because it’s relatively cheap to produce HP yet they can charge a big premium for it.

      Emissions and mileage requirement have turned everything into the same CUV blob with a direct injected 2.0L turbo. I can add six screens, 14 drive modes and 100HP to that blob and charge you $10k!

      • Sean

        The new top trim Tiguan is gonna have more hp than a GTI.

      • Sensei

        If only they could have added more screens!

        The new version of Audi’s best-selling Q5 SUV arrives in the US

        https://arstechnica.com/cars/2025/06/the-new-version-of-audis-best-selling-q5-suv-arrives-in-the-us/

        To begin with, the US will get just two choices of powertrain. The Q5, which starts at $52,299, is powered by a 2.0 L turbocharged, direct-injection four-cylinder engine, which generates 268 hp (200 kW) and 295 lb-ft (400 Nm), which is sent to all four wheels via a seven-speed dual-clutch transmission. The SQ5 is the fancier, more powerful version. This starts at $64,800, and its 3.0 L turbocharged, direct-injection V6 provides 362 hp (270 kW) and 406 lb-ft (550 Nm), again to all four wheels via a seven-speed DCT.

      • Sean

        new version of Audi’s best-selling Q5 SUV

        Yuck.

  31. Derpetologist

    Oh, how I laughed:

    Only Fans creators discover chicks with dicks like such porn, proceed to shove dildos in their panties and make bank. But then, men pretending to be women are outraged at the existence of women pretending to be men pretending to be women.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQsKNYx8ciE

    How dare they!, cry the trans-pretenders.

    • Not Adahn

      This is a remarkable timeline.

    • The Other Kevin

      I’ve seen that sort of thing scrolling through Instagram. I was confused. Now I’m amused.

    • Common Tater

      Reverse trap was a thing 20 years ago.

      • The Other Kevin

        If there’s easy money, someone will do it, no matter how low they have to sink.

    • Ted S.

      Didn’t they watch Victor/Victoria?

      • Gender Traitor

        You just knew they were going to screw up the remake. 🙄

      • Nephilium

        Gender Traitor:

        What do you mean? Ed Wood is a NATIONAL TREASURE!

  32. The Late P Brooks

    Hero

    No longer is Newsom responding to criticism, often from fellow Democrats, over aligning with Republicans on transgender athletes or proposing to scale back health insurance for undocumented immigrants. Instead, as Trump turns California into a test of his power to impose his will on blue states, Newsom is the Democrat standing in his way.

    “We’re at an inflection point in the country’s history,” said South Carolina state Rep. JA Moore, a lawmaker who has been deeply involved in his state’s early presidential primary politics. “I see in this moment that the governor is fighting like hell, not just for the people of LA or the people of California or even the country. He’s fighting for democracy itself.”

    ——-

    On Tuesday, Newsom’s press office mocked Trump with an X post casting Trump as a Star Wars villain. The governor’s response to his threatened arrest — “come and get me, tough guy” — turned into a rallying cry that’s getting noticed by Democrats nationally and in states that will be key to his potential 2028 prospects.

    ——-

    Democrats have united behind Newsom, with top party officials echoing his warnings that Trump is unnecessarily thrusting the nation into crisis. The party’s official social media account posted a glam shot of a stoic-looking Newsom emblazoned with his “come and get me” quote. Democratic governors began reaching out over the weekend to see how they could assist, according to multiple people with knowledge of the developments granted anonymity to speak about private discussions, producing a statement lambasting the Trump administration.

    He’s just like King Kong at the top of the Empire State building.

    • rhywun

      I would have thought that unleashing his commie stormtroopers on the streets of LA was a bad look but what do I know.

  33. Tonio

    Good Morning, Glibs. I want to give everyone a rundown on what happened and where we’re at.

    Dream Host, our hosting service, experienced extended problems across their infrastructure, leaving both us and other customers down. They also lied about this, posting on their own website that everything was back up long before it was.

    TPTB are seriously considering ditching Dream Host because of this.

    We are also considering ditching WordPress, and simplifying the current insanely complex (yet money saving) hosting setup. Because of the current complex setup, we are SOL if WebDom is available.

    Sorry for no links this morning. Our normal publication schedule will resume at 11:00 Central with SugarFree’s latest fiction.

    • R C Dean

      If y’all need to go to a better and more expensive hosting setup, just let us know and I’m sure we can help with the cost.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        Hear, Hear!

      • Jarflax

        I second this. If there are issues $s will solve or ease I will be happy to provide some. I wish I had skills or knowledge that would be helpful.

      • Night Watchman

        What RC said

      • Tonio

        Thanks, folks. I’ve passed that on to our shadowy Glibs overlords.

    • Sean

      Thanks Tonio.

    • Sensei

      Appreciate the update and all that everyone here does to keep things working.

    • The Other Kevin

      Thanks Tonio. I appreciate the update, and all the work people are putting in behind the scenes.

      What’s the alternative to WordPress? I have used it and I was not a fan. Now I have GoDaddy host my web sites, and I use their free web site builder. I doubt that would meet the needs of this site, though.

      WordPress always seems like too much. It’s big and bloated and I only need about 5% of the features. I am saying this as someone who’s written web applications for 30 years.

      • Tonio

        I don’t know what the alternatives are. That’s outside my wheelhouse. I’m leaving that part to the experts, and happy to do so.

      • The Other Kevin

        If there isn’t some lean version of WordPress that just does the few things we need, it seems there is a market for that. We can’t be the only ones with this problem. Hmmm.

      • rhywun

        I ran a tiny WP site about 20 years ago. 🫤

        But yeah, there’s gotta be some alternatives out there but I don’t do websites anymore so I have no idea what they are.

      • The Other Kevin

        I ran it through Grok, and there are some alternatives. Something called Ghost seems good. But as Tonio said, the site is in the hands of people better at this than I am.

    • Fourscore

      Do it, Tonio!

  34. The Late P Brooks

    In California, the crisis has led Democrats to close ranks behind Newsom while shifting attention from budget negotiations that alienated some key Newsom allies as he looked to close a massive deficit. Newsom joined other Democrats in demanding the release of David Huerta, a prominent labor leader who was detained during a protest.

    “We’ve been waiting to feel like the governor is standing up and fighting for California and every Californian, and he seems to be doing that,” said California Labor Federation leader Lorena Gonzalez.

    Fighting for every Californian? I think there might be some people who disagree with that assertion. But they don’t count.

    • The Other Kevin

      He’s falling into the trap again. By resisting Trump, he’s a hero to the far left. They’re very vocal and he’s getting great press. But he’s still on the wrong side of an 80/20 issue. If he wants to be president some day this is a bad move.

      • Common Tater

        Except he has to win the primary first. Dem primary voters are way more left.

  35. The Late P Brooks

    Watching that video, Beretta brags about there being no welds on their hand made guns. H&H video spends more than two minutes showing welding. No idea if that really matters.

    I didn’t make it past the chin warmer.

    No welds. Nothing says “hand crafted” like a seven axis CNC machine whittling complex parts from a solid chunk of metal.

    • UnCivilServant

      That CAD file was lovingly hand crafted by our industrial designer.

    • Not Adahn

      The video was shot three years ago. If you like grade 5 walnut and ridiculously complicated lockplates, you should watch it.

      Also happy fat old Italian ladies doing upholstery and checkering.

    • R C Dean

      I don’t mind using a machine to rough out the parts. It’s the final fitting and finishing that I would expect to be done by hand.

      • Jarflax

        ^ This! I want the parts that have to withstand pressure and heat made using modern methods. The carving, engraving, and external polishing by hand make it art, the seven axis CNC machine makes it accurate and durable.

      • R C Dean

        I do include the final fitting of the working bits, as well, not just the engraving/polishing/etc.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        Especially when you are lighting off a .500 Nitro Express round at a charging cape buffalo.

        CNC with proper engineering is what is needed at that point.

  36. The Late P Brooks

    Rather than focus on immigration policies like California’s “sanctuary” limits on cooperation between local law enforcement and the federal government, Newsom has framed the fight as a matter of safeguarding democracy against authoritarianism — a microcosm of Democrats’ case against Trump and a key gauge of their ability to stop him.

    “If this doesn’t become about immigration but becomes about federal deployment of military domestically,” said Rob Stutzman, a California-based Republican consultant who opposes Trump, “(Newsom) may be onto the issue that propels him not just within the party but beyond the party as a bulwark against a potential threat to democracy.”

    Yes, yes, of course. All we have to do is redefine democracy as the tyranny of the lunatic fringe and we’re home free.

    • The Other Kevin

      I don’t think Trump is a dictator or a threat to democracy. But historically, people are willing to tolerate a dictator as long as he addresses major problems and fixes things. No matter how you look at it these people are playing it wrong.

  37. The Other Kevin

    I had my colonoscopy Monday. It went so well I got a second date.

    Actually it went badly, the prep wasn’t enough so they couldn’t see anything. Now I have to do a 2-day prep and go back. I’m not sure if they’ll charge me for it. A few people we know in the medical field told me my paralysis causes my bowels to move slowly, so the 1-day prep wouldn’t work. They should have known that.

    I did get this email, does this look legit?

    DEAR OTHER KEVIN,
    STEVE SMITH HALP. HIM GIVE COLON PROBE, NO CHARGE.

    STEVE SMITH, PROMINENT FOREST DOCTOR

    • Jarflax

      On the one hand no polyp can withstand the forest doctor. On the other hand, everything else about the situation.

    • Common Tater

      Well, that’s shitty.

    • Grumbletarian

      the prep wasn’t enough so they couldn’t see anything.

      So you’re saying you’re full of shit?

    • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

      Sorry TOK, this is a crappy situation.

  38. The Late P Brooks

    Speaking of seven axis CNC-ing, the latest Steve Morris Engines youtube has some lovely footage of their machine in the early stages of turning a giant solid chunk of aluminum into an engine block, if you’re into that sort of thing.

  39. The Late P Brooks

    Looking at some of the headlines, there appears to be an attempt to cast doubt on the authenticity of the images coming out of California. I guess it’s just a bunch of AI fakery.

    • Common Tater

      “cheap fakes”

  40. Certified Public Asshat

    3k comments in 3 hours and most of Reddit thinks this guy is in the wrong: AITA for telling my girlfriend that we are not living together if she wants to split joint expenses proportional to income?

    TLDR: Man lives rent-free in his grandparents’ house, and his girlfriend, a grad student, wants to move in. She suggests splitting joint expenses proportionally to income, which would mean the man covers most costs. He prefers a 50/50 split, concerned about her past financial irresponsibility, including credit card debt and high car payments. His current roommate, who would move out if she moves in, currently pays all of the utilities.

    • The Other Kevin

      That sounds a lot like my oldest kid’s previous living situation (aka “the cult”). She made the most money so she was responsible for contributing more. She was paying medical bills for someone else’s kids, and she had no money left for her own needs. Letting an adult skate by without being responsible for themselves is a recipe for disaster.

      • Akira

        She made the most money so she was responsible for contributing more.

        Sounds like a disaster with a lot of bad incentives. I’m glad this notion never took hold in the real world and was only used for 20-somethings living in an apartment, haha.

    • EvilSheldon

      You’re each using equal parts of the home, so you each contribute half the upkeep. Cut and dry. This ‘everyone contributes what they can afford’ bullshit is for life’s losers.

    • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

      It really doesn’t matter if it is 50/50 or proportional. What matters is that both people agree to it.

      Anything else is just icing on a shit cake.

    • R C Dean

      Just tell her that if she wants to pay her share with sexual services, that’s fine. See if that changes her tune about paying half in cash.

  41. Common Tater

    “Darby Kaikkonen, a former senior official at the Washington State Office of Superintendent of Public Instruction (OSPI), has filed a federal lawsuit alleging she was fired in retaliation for voting to protect girls’ sports from biological male participation.

    Kaikkonen, who served as Director of Student Information at OSPI and is an elected member of the Tumwater School Board, cast a vote on February 27, 2025, in favor of Resolution No. 09-24-25. The non-binding resolution supported two proposed amendments to the Washington Interscholastic Activities Association (WIAA) rules that would have created an “Open” division for all students while reserving the “Girls” category for biological females. Her vote, cast during a publicly noticed meeting, was in line with her constituents’ concerns over fairness and safety in school athletics.

    Less than two weeks later, Kaikkonen was placed on administrative leave by OSPI and then abruptly terminated on March 19—without cause, warning, or disciplinary history. Her termination came just as she was preparing for her husband’s military deployment to the Middle East, during a time when she had requested spousal leave.”

    https://thepostmillennial.com/washington-education-official-sues-superintendent-says-she-was-fired-for-protecting-girls-sports

    Threat to our democracy.

  42. The Late P Brooks

    Impassioned plea

    Last week, the House Republican majority passed what can only be called their “Big Billionaire Bill” — a budget reconciliation measure that amounts to one the largest transfers of wealth in American history.

    ——-

    Republicans claim to be the party of families. But their bill makes it harder for working people to get by — harder to welcome a new child, get postpartum care, or afford basic medical needs. Worse, Republicans will make it harder for millions of families to afford groceries every month thanks to cuts to nutrition assistance programs. When billionaires can get richer at the expense of working families, what does that say about us as a nation?

    I fear America’s promise of hope and opportunity will dim if this administration keeps pushing us to the point where no one sees a future here anymore.

    But I refuse to accept a future where America’s greatness is measured by the size of its tax breaks for billionaires instead of the strength of our working families. I call on the Senate to reject this bill and protect the American Dream for everyone.

    Stealing from poor people. For shame.

  43. Common Tater

    “A federal public health advisory panel long dominated by pharmaceutical influence, whose expressed reservations about particular inoculations never stopped it from recommending them, is getting a fresh start under the drug industry’s most powerful critic.

    Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. announced Monday the removal of all 17 members of the Advisory Committee on Immunization Practices, which advises the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, citing “persistent conflicts of interest” that made it “little more than a rubber stamp for any vaccine.”

    https://justthenews.com/government/federal-agencies/rfk-jr-dumps-vaccine-advisory-board-history-conflict-interest

    “Robert F. Kennedy Jr. has sensationally ousted every member of the Advisory Committee on Immunization Practices (ACIP), the Biden-appointed group that made recommendations on the necessity and use of vaccines, in the first of a series of sweeping changes.

    The decision to remove all 17 members of the scientific committee, which advises the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, and replace them with his own picks, was described as “a clean sweep” by President Trump’s Health Secretary in a Wall Street Journal opinion piece published Monday.”

    https://nypost.com/2025/06/10/us-news/rfk-jr-ousts-every-member-of-cdc-vaccine-advisory-committee/

    Good.

  44. Common Tater

    “The Party for Socialism and Liberation (PSL) — which openly calls for revolution to bring down the current American system and which publicly sympathizes with murderous Communist regimes — has been a leader in organizing and fueling anti-ICE demonstrations in LA as well as in other cities nationwide.

    The leadership and activities of PSL are closely tied to far-left groups bolstered by the financial network of wealthy Marxist businessman Neville Roy Singham, who sold his ThoughtWorks tech company in 2017 and has used the money to fund openly Communist endeavors globally.

    Singham has been described as a “comrade” of — and is a financial backer of — the People’s Forum, a Marxist revolutionary group based in New York City. The group calls itself “a movement incubator for working class and marginalized communities to build unity across historic lines of division at home and abroad.”

    https://justthenews.com/government/security/ccp-linked-communist-revolutionary-org-fuels-anti-ice-protests-la-and

    OFFS!

    • R C Dean

      “openly calls for revolution to bring down the current American system”

      To the extent they are sufficiently* involved in the violence of the riots, that would be sedition.

      *yes, this word is carrying a lot of weight

    • EvilSheldon

      It strikes me that a single Army Special Forces group, given permission and the existing open-source intel that we have, could probably remove every one of these Marxist leadership cadres in about a month.

      That would be illegal, though.

      • R C Dean

        I don’t know why you would need the military for the cadres on US soil, at least. The fact that these networks haven’t been dismantled using ordinary law enforcement is a sign of our societal sickness. There’s no way the financial flows can’t be mapped (and probably have been). Fire up a grand jury and issue subpoenas to map the organizational network (again, if it hasn’t been already), issue arrest warrants, and Bob’s your uncle.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        RICO is your friend and buddy.

    • The Other Kevin

      I know there’s a lot of skepticism in these parts, but even bothering to identify the source of this, and doing so quickly, is already a huge improvement.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        For all the bitching and moaning coming from the left, Trump is being very careful to stay either within the law as written, or within the constitutional parameters of the law.

        Unlike many previous presidents.

    • Ed Wuncler

      The revolution has never been about freeing the people from tyranny. It’s about putting themselves in power and controlling people. Think Animal Farm:

      “But the luxuries of which Snowball had once taught the animals to dream, the stalls with electric light and hot and cold water, and the three-day week, were no longer talked about. Napoleon had denounced such ideas as contrary to the spirit of Animalism. The truest happiness, he said, lay in working hard and living frugally.

      Somehow it seemed as though the farm had grown richer without making the animals themselves any richer-except, of course, for the pigs and the dogs. Perhaps this was partly because there were so many pigs and so many dogs. It was not that these creatures did not work, after their fashion…..But still, neither pigs nor dogs produced any food by their own labour; and there were very many of them, and their appetites were always good.”

  45. The Late P Brooks

    Just like Nuremburg

    Members of a crowd filled with members of the military and their families booed and jeered President Trump’s political rivals and the press Tuesday at the president’s prompting during his address at Fort Bragg in North Carolina.

    The response from attendees, most of whom were wearing military fatigues, was a jarring sight given the military’s history as a traditionally nonpartisan entity. Presidents have historically drawn criticism when they have been seen as using the military as a political pawn.

    Those filthy rednecks.

    • R C Dean

      Ah, yes, I remember the fully-throated denunciations by leading cultural and media figures after Biden’s speech where he was flanked by uniformed military men.

  46. The Late P Brooks

    At one point, Trump invoked the unrest in Los Angeles, where demonstrations in response to immigration raids have at times turned violent. The president referred to the “governor of California” and “the mayor of Los Angeles,” which triggered boos from some in the audience directed at Gov. Gavin Newsom (D) and Mayor Karen Bass (D).

    The president identified journalists in attendance as “the fake news,” a comment that prompted jeers from some service members on hand.

    The address drew criticism from some Democrats.

    “It’s truly disgraceful to watch Trump give a nakedly political speech at Fort Bragg, and encourage uniformed members of the military to boo and hiss political opponents,” Tommy Vietor, who served in the Obama White House, posted on the social platform X. “I realize we’ve given up on norms from the before times, but it’s still awful and harmful to the military!”

    How dare he drag politics into American life?

  47. The Late P Brooks

    I’ve passed that on to our shadowy Glibs overlords.

    Whatever you do, don’t mention the cabal.

  48. The Late P Brooks

    I don’t know why you would need the military for the cadres on US soil, at least. The fact that these networks haven’t been dismantled using ordinary law enforcement is a sign of our societal sickness. There’s no way the financial flows can’t be mapped (and probably have been). Fire up a grand jury and issue subpoenas to map the organizational network (again, if it hasn’t been already), issue arrest warrants, and Bob’s your uncle.

    Maybe we should have some sort of federal bureau tasked with investigating things like this.

  49. The Late P Brooks

    Barn find of the day

    Very nice. Needs some better seats.

  50. The Late P Brooks

    Birds of a feather

    Former Mayor Michael Bloomberg is prepared to endorse his old nemesis, Andrew Cuomo, for mayor Tuesday — backing an ex-governor who is mounting a comeback bid in the June 24 Democratic primary.

    Cuomo secured Bloomberg’s support after months of conversations between their top aides; the two men met Monday to discuss the race, according to someone familiar with the outreach. A likely motivating factor for the former mayor to get involved on behalf of a one-time political adversary is the rise of democratic socialist Zohran Mamdani, who has begun to close the gap between himself and the frontrunner.

    Like Cuomo, Bloomberg loathes the left flank of the Democratic Party and is a devout supporter of Israel — two views that have prompted his concerns about Mamdani.

    Who better to endorse a fellow authoritarian narcissistic sociopath?