EDITOR’S NOTE: This is a new series, it will alternate with the Unwatched Episodes until one or the other is exhausted, then it will continue onward to the end.
I was jolted from my happy, drunken stupor by the slam of a sjambok striking the bar near my head. I sat bolt upright, bloodshot eyes darting about for the source of the noise stinging my skull. The guard captain in his red and beige jerkin smirked from behind his gray and brown beard.
“Ardo, why wake me up?” I asked. “I wasn’t bothering anyone.”
“Well, your ‘oliness, you’re needed. In your official capacity.”
“Which one?” I asked.
“Judicial,” Ardo said. “Ain’t nobody got a use for a Priest of Craddix.”
With a groan, I raised from my stool and tossed some coinage to the barkeep. It was probably less than I owed, but it was a good idea to pay something on the tab. Sunlight stabbed my eyes as I stepped outside, and the rancid odors of dockside assailed my nostrils. I felt a nudge from the short leather whip direct me towards whatever legal headache awaited me. I was able to blink my way towards some semblance of sight and noted that we were headed towards the southern tip of Jinwick. The ‘Unfortunate Intersection’ was that spot where the road up to the plateau reached the low ground. It was exactly at the spot where the two dockside neighborhoods collided – the Atlorian and the Azanjin. Violence at the Unfortunate Intersection was all too common, even with Ardo’s guards frequently on site. Though the guards were often biased towards their Atlorian countrymen when it came to the Azanjin. The road to the top of the bluff may have started at the Unfortunate Intersection, but it wound around the eastern face, behind the Atlorian docks, before reaching the upper level at the north end of the island. The cluster of shops flanking it made a decent impersonation of a gatehouse, even with open sky in between. They were stone buildings, their gray facades a marked contrast to the timberwork of the Atlorian dockside and the stuccoed exteriors the Azanjin favored.
The guards were out in force, having shut down the entire area. This naturally caused troubles all its own as curious onlookers, irate travelers, and opportunistic cutpurses all jostled in a mass outside their cordon. Ardo’s bellows and threatening gestures with his sjambok cleared a corridor for us to reach the scene in the midst of the crowd.
It was a body. Lying face-down in the trampled muck of the Unfortunate Intersection. Whatever color his shirt had been, it was now blood red. From the attire and tangled mop of pale hair, he was not Azanjin, though he was likely human.
“Why did you drag me here?” I asked. “Especially since I’m likely still drunk?”
“Ya ain’t drunk, just a mite hungover.”
“That didn’t answer my question.”
“If you look closer, that there is Magistrate Wilcox,” Ardo said. I circled around the body to an angle where I could see the face smooshed against the paving sets. I frowned as I recognized my secular counterpart.
“I see. That still doesn’t explain why I’m here.”
“Well, you see, if either the civil magistrate or the church judge is incapacitated, the other is to assume his duties until he is no longer incapacitated or a replacement is made. Since Azerion doesn’t give up his dead, you’ve got a job to do.”
“Which is what? I don’t see a trial here.”
“The civil magistrate also investigates offenses of a serious nature. I’d say this qualifies.”
“You could have led with that, Guard Captain.”
“I figured I’d wait for you to wake up.”
“Anyway, what did your guards see?”
“They were… indisposed when this happened and came when they heard someone scream.”
“I see you’ve misplaced your lower class affectation, Ardo.”
“Go suck a goose’s arse.”
I turned my attention such as I had command of back towards the scene instead of the guard captain. “Blood’s been trampled through and tracked all over the place,” I said.
“It ‘appens,” Ardo said, exaggerating his affected lower class Atlorian accent.
“If it didn’t ‘appen’,” I said, “we would be able to tell where he was attacked and have a much better idea where to start.”
“Well, it is what it is, yer ‘oliness.”
“Fine, lets start with what we do know. When were these screams that alerted your ‘indisposed’ men, and who was screaming?”
One of the guards I hadn’t been paying much attention to stepped forward. “It was a washerwoman on her way up the bluff to start her workday. She screamed because it just got bright enough to see that it was a body and not someone in a drunken stupor.”
“I take it you were early on the scene?” I asked.
“Yes, sir,” he said.
“Fine. I’ll want to talk to you later, and the washerwoman. Right now we need to move the body someplace where we’re not blocking all the traffic in the city. I’m going to go find someone to examine it closer.”
“Wot fer?” Ardo asked.
“To tell me what you can’t.”
I started towards the road up to the bluff. A shrill voice interrupted me.
“Oi, they told me I had to stay and talk to you, and you’re leaving?” The sound of the voice was like a heated wire being drawn through my brain. I turned to look at the woman. I could tell her profession immediately on sight. Washerwomen developed a stout build from the physical nature of their work. And she had the arms of one, bared to the shoulder with little leather straps that pinned her sleeves out of the way.
“I didn’t know they’d detained you,” I said, stepping over to the woman, whose shawled head only reached my collarbone. “I’m Jasper Browne, Acting Magistrate. So, you found the body?”
“Aye, I did.”
“Tell me about it.”
“Well, I’d gotten up extra early to take Agnes some soup. Poor dear is sick in bed. So I was going to take on her customers for the day. I could use the extra money, things being as they are.”
“I see.”
“So me and Agatha got to talking-”
“What’s the relation of Agatha to Agnes?”
“Why none at all. What gave you that idea?”
“You’d said you’d taken soup to Agnes.”
“Did I? I could have sworn I’d said Agatha. Anyway, the woman doesn’t shut up. She keeps talking away as if I didn’t have to go wash the linens for a dozen families today. You know how some people get that way, yapping on and on and never really getting to the point.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose, my alcohol headache worsening with each word I heard in that woman’s voice.
“Was Agatha involved in the discovery of the magistrate’s body?” I asked, somewhat sharply.
“No, she weren’t even around, and don’t live nowhere near Agnes. And I had brought soup to Agnes. She kept talking my ear off. I guess nobody came round to see her since she’d fallen ill.”
“Did Agnes have anything to do with the discovery of the body?” I asked, pain throbbing between my temples.
“What? No, she were sick in bead and blabbing my ears off-”
“Can we move ahead to the point where you found the body?”
“Well, fine. Now Agatha’s chatting kept me later than I wanted.”
The pain spread through more of my head and grew sharper.
“-and I weren’t at the base of the hill until the sun were already rising. Now I trip over what I think is a poor drunk. Now those layabouts will sleep off their drink just about anywhere, but the middle of the road is just rude. They really need to crack down on the alcohol-”
“The body!” I said curtly.
“Well,” she huffed, “as I said, I thought it were a drunk, but the sun’s light was just getting brighter and I realized he were covered in blood. Now you ain’t going to get that much blood out of a tunic no matter how hard you scrub. Once it sets, it ain’t coming out. You should hear some of my customers whinging when I tell them the blood isn’t going to come out of their best tunic that they went and got sloshed in the night before. As I said, they really need to crack down on the alcohol-”
“Gods’ sake, you rambling rockpounder, will you stay on topic!”
I saw the washerwoman’s face redden in rage mere moments before her fist connected with my jaw. All the upper body strength her profession required was behind that fist, and it snapped my head right round. Still saturated with spirits, my consciousness gave up the ghost before I hit the pavement.
So, the Powers that Be have decided that allowing me to run two serialized articles in parallel would be a violation of nominative derteminism, so they’ve interleaved the serials. What this means is that every other week you will get the UnWatched reviews, and in between you will get the next chapter of Judge of Jinwick. Since there are only ten chapters in Judge of Jinwick, this should only last twenty weeks.
This story takes place in the same fantasy world as “Beyond the Edge of the Map” and “Prince of the North Tower”, but does not involve any recurring characters from those stories. Special thanks to GT for proofreading my typos. The dilectical dialog made the spellchecker freak out.
Great start to the series. I look forward to the rest.
Thanks. I aim to entertain.
I deliberately made shorter chapters so busy Glibs can read the installments without asking too much of their time.
This is a fun, and concise, introduction to the characters and setting. Well-done, perhaps especially the dialog. It’s been a long, long while since I reread “Beyond the Edge of the Map.” It’ll be fun to explore this as a series, along with Unwatched, which sparks fun memories and conversations.
Well done and thanks.
You’re welcome.
I keep trying to write crime stories, this is the first I’ve finished.
Let me know when you’ve figured out whodunnit (I don’t think there’s enough info in chapter 1 to figure it out)
On Topic:
Through 4 innings, Toronto leads the Yankees 11-0. 22- year-old rookie Trey Yesavage, in his 4th major league game, has 10 strikeouts.
LOL Judge sucks.
😥
This is only the first installment, I swear it gets good.
Dude, I’m not ripping on your story.
I’m aware of that. I was looking for the funniest response I could make from my overall ignorance.
LOL
MY name is JUDGE!
Ha! I was gonna make a similar comment. New York is simply… continuing to be stomped. Bellinger, a Cub last year, has *all* of the Yank’s rbi’s in the series so far. The Blue Jays’ hitters have hit homers more frequently than they’ve struck out.
Judge… has lived up to his ‘not-post -season -material’ fame. Absolutely is mental, and he ain’t got it. Pressure of high expectations, is my guess. Is funny, beautiful, how baseball is the only team sport to allow each player their own distinct times to shine or die.
On the other hand, Vlad Jr. has fucking six RBIs halfway into the game. Ouch.
Usually, Judge is quite good.
Usually, Judge comes across as an A-hole.
13-7 now 😮
Yes. When you’re up by 12 runs, you should take out the kid who’s throwing a no-hitter who’s not going to pitch again for at least a week and turn it over to your bullpen whom you might need Tuesday and Wednesday. Makes total sense. 😡
Sore-y.
Meh. He’d already thrown 70+ pitches 5.3 IN into it; no way he was gonna finish the game. Make sure he has enough to qualify for the W, and keep him as well-rested as possible. He can still pitch in Game 4 if necessary, hopefully better rested.
As for Judge, I’ve never got the asshole vibe from him, and he easily could cross into that, considering how good he is (in the reg season). He does seem very performative, kinda trying to act ‘normal,’ which he ain’t. I’m also positive someone that talented has been slobbered over for several decades now in his life, and that has to have a powerful impact on your psyche. Get the sense that his sense of ‘normal’ is much askew from its actual meaning.
For the most part, I don’t mind the Yankees, but my wife fucking loathes them. So it might be a carry over from her perception of him.
Your wife is a good woman, ZWAK.
This is the way.
The Yankees are the Dallas Cowboys of baseball.
Nobody actually likes them.
There’s good reason to hate the Yankees.
Never forget.
One accident over a hundred years ago?
UCS:
Nobody carries a grudge more than a fanbase. They could teach the Irish how to do it.
Elway is still the devil, the Ravens can all burn, Pittsbugh sucks, and for many, they don’t give a damn ’bout the whole state of Michigan.
Damn Yankees, always killing the red man.
Thanks UCS.
OT I bought a new headphone that uses the oddest connector to attach the cable to the headset.
https://www.locationsound.com/hirose-hr10a-7p-4p-73-4-pin-circular-push-pull-connector-male-3161?srsltid=AfmBOopKLHZdSOyZyJyQ0j_-JOfJGJrLQTTYMl5FkvqdAs4D5J60kYirhttps://www.locationsound.com/hirose-hr10a-7p-4p-73-4-pin-circular-push-pull-connector-male-3161?srsltid=AfmBOopKLHZdSOyZyJyQ0j_-JOfJGJrLQTTYMl5FkvqdAs4D5J60kYir
I don’t understand why they didn’t use a 2.5mm TS connector. Much more common. And arguably less resistance.
It’s got the cool points going for it but they are $14 each versus $5 or less.
But how does it sound?
Exactly the same…;)
So, you do understand it, $14 instead of $5.
Looks like the audio connector on military radios.
Naturally. Why use something cheaper when FedGov is paying.
It does attach with a satisfying click.
Keep an eraser handy to clean the contacts.
https://caig.com/deoxit-d-series/
A little goes a long way. Very useful for automotive use as well.
This connector is so small you’d need a fiberglass pen. And problem is the glass shards will foul the connector.
Thanks, UCS, this seems to be right in my wheelhouse.
Do Jasper Brown and the washer woman fall in lust, retiring to a quiet spot for some serious canoodling?
No. This is the washer woman’s last scene in the story.
Admittedly my taste for romance in fantasy stories is nontraditional. Oh well.
“Texas mom who shot her 4 children, killing 2 of them, faces murder charges, authorities say”
Leftist rewrite: “Patriarchal victim only eradicates two carbon sinks
Oppressed blames oppressors’ faulty training for two missed opportunities”
“Hundreds of thousands march across Europe in support of Palestinians”
Realistic rewrite: “Hundreds of thousand infiltrates foment overthrow of emasculated Europe
Cultural cancer, purposefully sown from within, erodes Euro identity. Crickets.”
UnCivilServant on October 5, 2025 at 4:00 pm
So, the Powers that Be have decided that allowing me to run two serialized articles in parallel would be a violation of nominative determinism
I wasn’t sure what that meant, so I looked it up and found this article. I busted out laughing many times throughout:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nominative_determinism
Only good examples I can think of from my own experience:
– The two lunchladies in elementary school were Mrs. Slaughter and Mrs. Knife
– Worked with a guy with the last name Sargent who was a sergeant in the Army
– Someone with the last name Drinks who became a massive alcoholic
I don’t have too many personal examples. But it’s an amusing concept.
That’s funny.
My unit had a sergeant sergeant.
He should have become an officer and been a Major Sergeant just to confuse everybody.
I worked with a guy called Dick Kuntz.
His parents naming him Richard was the kindest thing they coulda done. Coulda named him Sue, but that’s been done. Learn early to own your name, cuz that family one ain’t ever leavin’ ya.
“NOW YOU GONNA DIE!” ~ Shel Silverstein, renowned author of children’s books.
Richards can be Dicks when they want to.
Randy, definitely name that kid Randy.
I worked with a Bambi who wasn’t a stripper. I also worked with a SGT Major which caused some confusion.
I was at a small AF base in Germany going to school. Three army guys in a class with about a dozen AF troops. Anyway the base commander’s name was Sergeant and his rank was Major. I overheard the AF guys talking about Major Sergeant, I corrected them a couple times before I knew his name. I was soundly embarrassed.
Strangely, the AF 1st Sgt was named Starr, the father of Bart Starr. He had a picture of his son on his desk, throwing a pass.
Went to basic with a guy by the last name of Sirr. He got extra for his name.
a guy by the last name of Sirr
In high school I had a job at the local Holiday Inn. I was a “porter” which was basic all round gofer. I got a hold of the label maker one night and created a name tag with “Sir” on it.
I loved it when some cranky old tourista would grab me to complain and take a look at my name tag so he could really chew me out and begin with “Let me tell you something sir…” then he’d realize how I’d gotten him to call me sir and get really really pissed.
Why do I not believe you?
UCS:
Maybe your trust issues can be traced back to a bad childhood?
I also had a name tag that said “Gunga Jim” which I wore the week that the ice machine in the bar was broken and I had to tote ice from the restaurant over to bar constantly.
The uniform shirt we were supposed to wear also had one of those big oval patches with “Porter” written on it in cursive. Lots of old people got confused and called me Peter because of that.
No, I think it’s the aura of fabulism you project.
You think I’m fabulous? Thank you!
Your weaponized ignorance will not save you.
I have never grown flax, eaten flax seed knowingly, or made linen in my life.
You have, in flax, avoided that stuff entirely.
It’s got the cool points going for it but they are $14 each versus $5 or less.
Looks a lot like the connectors Pi Research used to use on their car harnesses, except they probably charged $350.
“You should hear some of my customers whinging”
Noice.
It is an annoying word used by annoying people. So it was perfect for this character.
I like the word. I’ve only heard it in British-speak, so it’s got a flavor to it, but to whinge is simply to pointlessly, aimlessly whine for the sake of doing so. Its onomatopoetic cadence fits beautifully, with the sound itself reflecting the meaning.
I don’t, or wouldn’t, use it in public without knowing my audience understood its meaning. It’s awful smartassy to use uncommon -or five-syllable words – when they aren’t needed, or if there’s the distinct reality the meaning’ll be lost and confusion will reign.
There’s a time and place for Big Words with Big Meanings. I find people frequently shoehorn ’em in to self-inflict their sense of ‘sparkle’ and wit to their phrasing. It is rather tedious.
On the importance of brevity, I really do think the best short story I’ve ever read was (supposedly) born out of a contest to write a short story with only six words. Of unsure authorship (not Hemingway), I’m sure you all’ve heard it:
“Baby shoes for sale. Never worn.”
Apparently, it goes back to the 1880s: “For sale: baby carriage, never used.”
“Carriage for sale. Whinge not. Had twins.” <– My edit of the 'Happy Version.'
There’s a time and place for Big Words with Big Meanings. I find people frequently shoehorn ’em in to self-inflict their sense of ‘sparkle’ and wit to their phrasing. It is rather tedious.
I feel the same way about the contrived use of Latin, French, or occasionally German phrases by people trying to sound erudite…
“This zeitgeist gives a raison d’etre to the status quo vis-a-vis the vox populi!”
*barf*
What the hell is whinging?
Are you actually whining?
Jeez
(sigh) We’ve been over this.
Engines whine, dogs whine, people whinge. Whining is the making of a long high pitched sound. While people may whine they also whinge, i.e. complain persistently and irritatingly and, yes, usually in a whiny tone, but the two things are different and thus we have distinct terms for each action.
Sounds like well crafted bullshit Sir,
Lern tu spel
I thought Americans “whined” and Brits, Aussies, and Kiwis “whinged”.
Thanks akira, thats the best answer Ive heard.
Why do Americans speak better english than the Dominion countries?
I think they get arrested for that now. Damaging to the morale of the civil servants if the serfs complain don’t you know.
I wined, whined and whinged, in the same evening when I had to wind my watch in the wind.
Thanks for the story UnCiv.
So, whodunnit and why?
Colonel Mustard in the library with the lead pipe.
That’s not a why.
Because he had information that would lead to the arrest of Hillary Clinton.
there it is
😕
It’s gotta be either Agatha or Agnes.
I don’t know why.
🤔
I’m going to guess Ardo.
Dead guy was blackmailing Ardo so he could get his lecherous hands on the daughter.
Another name that begins with an A. 🤔
Stockpiling 🍿 for tomorrow morning’s Pavlovian ragebait posting here.
What happens tomorrow morning?
Good question. What’s the answer, GL?
I believe GL is a little skeptical about some of the Glib comments regarding goings on in Portland .
Does he have foreknowledge of more antifa rioting or something…?
He eats popcorn and feels superior to people outraged by the commies running Portland, or possibly angry about their comments and using this method to express that anger? I am not sure what was said that triggered this, after the first version of this comment earlier today I went back and looked and honestly we did not even live up to our normal rage standards, so either I missed something or GL has a soft spot for Portlandian Socialism.
I forgot the feds are in town. Yeah, if the day ends with a Y, then antifa will riot.
Just for the record, I’m not offering an assessment of anyone’s comments. Just wanted to provide some info.
Well, I’m several thousand miles away so I’ll wait-and-see.
Start of the week, all the usual commentators and outlets will release their spin on the weekend’s footage and performative posturing. Horseshoe theory is in full effect. All though it’s now about 3 or 4 different sides of stupid all cosplaying their fantasies.
I’m more upset about the transportation tax and fee increases jammed through with the help of the Rinos who would rather send out fundraising begs than do their jobs.
I bought four new tires on my truck thanks to the dickheads down there. I definitely have a soft spot for commies.
What happens tomorrow morning?
I’m guessing that we will dig into Wire Gate where Browns Nation has to explain how they got the camera operator to block Will the Thrill’s FG attempt that would have tied the game.
The NFL needs to stop coddling the big star franchises like the Browns!
Luckily, Truth and the American Way prevailed and the Vikes somehow won.
Pope Jimbo:
That was a home game my aching ass (or as the Brits would say, fanny bottom). The stadium was decent, although the seats were definitely not designed for ‘Mericans, especially midwestern ‘Mericans. The lack of cup holders meant I had to explain to quite a few people that for soccer games, they don’t trust their fans to bring food and drink back to their seats, and that the Iggles fans were generally better than the hooligan.
The Browns are now at 41 QBs starting since 1999, and not a single one of them has won their debut game.
Eh. I can believe that PPD is actively protecting “their community” from “outsiders.”
I mean, it’s something that police have a history of doing. Willem Defoe even made a movie about it.
The Rhywun – slumbrew death match in Buffalo is surprisingly close.
Too close. 🫤
A pleasant surprise but I figured it’d be close.
Pats are better than their record indicates.
Skubal has been good, but given up 2 over 6 innings, with his Tigers scoring no runs on two hits so far.
Seattle’s pitcher now is “Bazardo.” Damn. I really like that name. I’d have so much fun with it, with many nicknames embraced.
On Boomers: So a Bruce Springsteen biopic is coming out. Same vein as the recent Dylan one, AFAICT. Shortened: A hagiography of revered figures of a ‘long-ago’ time, purposefully written and portrayed to give the audience the glorified jerk-off session they seek. The Dylan flick was fantastically acted, remarkably well-sung, but its only purpose was to give Boomers the masturbatory fantasy of the Dylan they *want* to have existed, portrayed as bits ‘n pieces of truth found their way to reality. Bob *was* an asshole, and to be frank, he kinda had great cause to be after Freewheelin’.
Same as ever, people really like to be rewarded for ‘believing’ the things they’re supposed to think.
Full Disclosure: From Free Wheelin’ to Blood on the Tracks, I fucking love Bob Dylan.
I thought I remembered rolling my eyes at hearing a commercial for that in the background while I was cooking or something. 🙄
Yeah, he is a Boomer hero. I remember reading all my mom’s Stephen King paperbacks and it seemed like Springsteen was in the front matter of all of them.
Apparently he still is a dick. My girlfriend catered the wedding of one of his relatives. His demands were no photos, no conversations, no eye contact.
lolwut
I’ve read a few examples of entitled asshole contract porn over the years but that’s a new one to me.
No Photos would be an okay term, but no eye contact is “You deserve all the disrespect we can muster”
Are you familiar with Stephen Wilson Jr? He’s probably my favorite new artist the last couple years. Great singer / songwriter / guitarist from your neck of the woods in Seymour, IN. As far as I can tell, he’s the inventor of Grungetry music, a mixture of grunge and country. The dude writes some hard hitting songs, right in the feels. His first album Son of Dad is solid top to bottom.
He’s your typical looking musician: cowboy boots, western shirt, bolo tie, Mr Rogers cardigan, with an Our Lady of Guadalupe hat. Plays a beat up old Takamine classical guitar all reverbed out that looks like Willie’s guitar Trigger. Does all of his songs solo and also with a band. Great live. Here’s an original about the songs that make up the soundtracks of our lives. Brilliant lyrics.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jFMJat9OJOw
I can’t get past the guitar it looks like he fished out of a dumpster.
Hey, don’t judge a guitar by it’s cover. That’s like racist or something.
I really like the sounds he gets out of that guitar, especially some of the distorted guitar stuff he does.
On Shohei Ohtani madness: “He pitched to a guy who hit more home runs than he hit? Three times in this game Saturday, a dude who hit 55 homers this year (Ohtani) got to pitch against a guy who hit 56 homers (Kyle Schwarber). Is that as mind-blowing to you as it is to me?
You know how many other times in postseason history two men who hit that many home runs have ever faced each other? None, naturally. (Schwarber went 0-for-3 in that duel, by the way, and Ohtani punched him out twice.) …But it seems likely that Ohtani and Schwarber are going to finish 1-2 in the National League MVP voting this season.
–
Pulled Skubal after 6 innings and 2 runs. Now, in the 8th, it’s a 2-2 game. Ouch. (I am distinctly rooting for Game 5s in all these series, with the exception of the Cubs, who I hope to three in a row after dropping the opener.)
I know next to nothing about recent baseball but that guy irritates me for some unaccountable reason. He comes across as kind of arrogant and robotic. My outsider opinion is probably not much of a threat to his bazillionaire status, I guess.
Last year while living in Japan, I learned that you don’t throw any shade at Ohtani.
I got some serious stink from a couple Japanese guys I met at the gym when I scoffed about the notion that it was Ohtani’s translator that was doing all that betting. They seriously believed it and didn’t like some gaijin thinking that Ohtani would ever do anything wrong.
I assume all sportsball players are betting or game fixing until proven otherwise.
The Rose is off the bloom for UCS.
Ohtani sounds and acts like a stand-up dude. When there was a serious game of bean ball going on, after he was hit he made sure to keep the dugout in place, and the pitcher for the other team was ejected.
I have a friend who, at one time, was married to an FOB Japanese woman, and she went nuts for Ichiro Suzuki, and would not allow anyone to talk shit about him, either.
Wake up, Buffalo. You cannot lose to fucking New England. JFC.
Both teams are playing inconsistently. There’s no telling how it’s going to end.
lol Flipped from the Bills travesty to… um… Friends? And amused at the adverts for local prostitutes. If I dial in, do I really get a Syracuse whore?
And what the fuck, TV?
Wait, they are now advertizing on TV?
Dial 1-315-whatever for a “good time”.
Not technically whoring I guess but… really, is there a difference.
I think those are just 900 numbers under a disguised billing schema.
Syracuse is a lot more lit than I realized.
Old Beavis and Butthead is on. Goddammit I want a cigarette so bad.
Please tell me they are rocking out to White Zombie.
No, “old” as in “middle aged” and they comment mostly on dopey Youtube videos now instead of music videos.
Middle-aged Butt-Head is a heavy smoker and I almost hate quitting a few years ago. If only my state didn’t tax the everloving shit out of it because they care about me so much. 💕
I miss hanging out in bars and being a regular at good ones, but I really, really miss smoking.
Best ice breaker in the world.
Happy Monday all yous peoples.
🥸✌🏼🍁
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z0GFRcFm-aY
Good morning, Sean, Bro, and Ted’S.!
Morning.
Good morning, U. How are you today?
I’m tired and wobbly. Still have a cough. Took the trash to the curb. Need to put a bag back in the kitchen and bedside cans. (the bedside can is only really used when sick)
Hope you feel better, and especially get over the wobbly and the cough!
I’m uncertain where the wobbliness came from.
The latest propaganda is that Greta has been beaten and humiliated by the Israelis. Dragged by her hair even!
The bitch posted a tiktok while in captivity (allegedly, I’m not going to verify that shit). The Israelis aren’t the g00d guys to me, but pretending as if they’re dumb enough to beat some autistic teenage girl who is a national celebrity of some kind is retarded. How dumb do you have to be to believe that shit?
It’s likely the stuff of Greta and her ilks wet dreams. They WANT it to happen, want it to be true. So then they can pretend they really are heroes rather than useless idiots.
They’d likely be treated far worse if they tried to enter an Arab country without the proper permits.
You underestimate the general population. They are that fucking stupid.
Surely after the Israelis drone-striked their flotilla you can believe they’d beat wimmen!
I can’t help but notice how GretaCorp claims are repeated verbatim in the news, without “without evidence.”
You forgot Israel’s murder of Charlie Kirk.
I don’t remember Bro pushing that. And the guy who was seemed to be going thorough a breakdown, so there’s really no good reason to bringing it up again.
Heh. She should blame the Israelis for her haircut.
suh’ fam
whats goody
After a week doing a project at “home” Im back, baby…
TALL ERIE CANS!
Eerie.
Good morning, homey.
Crazy Ex/Naked housekeeper update:
She’s got a boyfriend. They’re in love. She wants to know if they can bang at my place ’cause he’s married.
So glad I changed the combinations on the garage door.
😱
Blech.
Whoa.
And I thought married-crazy-nurse-stalker was rough for me.
You have to take a screenwriting class and turn this into a movie script.
“You have to work on your realism. Nobody is going to believe this.”
Hmmm. It would have wide appeal due to its relatability. I’d have to thread the needle between Fatal Attractionand Secretary.
ROFLMAO
Howdy, folk. Break #1 on my Friday, outside for the sunrise.
The Seattle game was riveting. Impressive they ‘got’ to Slubal, or at least Polanco did. Massive swing in that series.
Let I hope Imanaga’s on his game today. I hope we don’t get swept, is my honest hope against Milwaukee.
The rare clouds here have a lovely glow. Damn.