I was besieged by a great cacophony of protestations as the three women repudiated each others’ claims. The parasol-carrying noblewoman was merely strident, while the other two shouted. The seeming tavern wench’s shrill lower class accent bored into my brain painfully. When speaking rapidly, the Azanjin woman’s voice became unintelligible. How much was her accent and how much was the incessant cross-talk was impossible to tell. My own voice was drowned out.
“Ladies, please, this is a temple,” Midon’s voice cut through the cacophony, despite being barely raised. “Is this how you wish to comport yourselves within sight of Azerion and his retinue?” The question drew our gazes to the looming statuary which dominated the temple hall. Behind the altar proper, Azerion was depicted as a figure in a hooded robe whose face could not be seen. His left hand held aloft the scales with which he weighed the souls of the dead. To either side, almost as imposing, were the images of Ithulm and the other psychopomps who guided the deceased to his court. The argument fell silent, with only the groan of the wind audible in the hall.
“Thank you,” Midon said. “Now, I have only begun to prepare the magistrate’s body. He will not be ready for some time. I’m afraid, Jasper, determining who has the rightful claim to him is your jurisdiction. I can only hope that you all maintain proper decorum within the holy precinct.” Midon turned, reentered the door to the basement, and left us. I seized the moment the mortuary priest had bought me.
“If any of you interrupt, it will count against your claim,” I said. “Now, let us step outside and discuss the matter.” I gestured towards the doorway. I got an indignant huff from the tavern girl and a resigned sigh from the noblewoman, but they turned and exited the temple. The Azanjin woman glared hesitantly, and I was afraid she’d begin protesting. I avoided openly sighing with relief when she turned and stepped outside.
Jinwick was a spur of rock just off the coast from a span of painfully green jungle. There were patches of cultivation cut into that jungle, but I pulled my attention back to the trio in the temple garden. Surrounded by flowering jungle plants it was still an incongruous group. Most men had a type, and there didn’t seem to be anything in common between the women besides being women.
“To start with, I’m going to need some names,” I said. I faced the noblewoman with the parasol. “Let’s start with you.”
“I am Corinna Todde. My father was among those who founded this colony. Thornton seemed like such a respectable man.” She glanced at the other women. “Though appearances seem to have been deceiving.” She regained a placid expression and returned her gaze to me. “I came here to see if it really was him and arrange for a funeral if the worst proved true.”
“And where might I find you with additional questions?” I asked.
“At my father’s house,” Corinna said, “within the citadel.” The citadel was a district at the highest point on the island, enclosed in walls and towers that commanded the harbors and protected the houses of the richest residents. I rarely had cause to venture there. The people subject to my jurisdiction were most often in the area we were already in.
“All right. I will have more questions, but right now I need to establish who these other two ladies are.” I turned to the Azanjin woman. “What name are you known by?”
“Nanjala,” she said. “And if these two are my competition, it is no wonder Thornton pledged to me. Real women appear to be in short supply.”
“If you are an exemplar of Azanjin womanhood, it’s no wonder your menfolk harass Atlorian women so shamelessly,” Corinna said.
“Miss Todde,” I said, preempting Nanjala’s retort, “do not interrupt.”
“Since your priest is still working his magic on Thornton’s body, I want the stuff he had on him when he died,” Nanjala said, visibly refraining from responding to Corinna.
“No!” the third woman blurted out. Nanjala glared at her.
“You will have a chance to speak. I have not made any decisions as of yet. Miss Nanjala, I was of the understanding that Azanjin women who had relations with foreign men risked being killed.”
“That’s why we agreed he would get me somewhere safe before we… made it formal.”
“And if I have more questions, where might I find you?”
“I have a house in the only civilized district of this city,” Nanjala said. “Anyone should be able to point the way.”
“Fine.” I turned to the last of the three, almost flinching at the venomous expression on her face. “What name are you known by?”
“Shelia Long,” she said. “And you can’t give his stuff to her. ‘E said he had a gift for me and was go’n to bring it las’ night, but ‘e never showed. ‘Cause someone stabbed ‘im. Pob’ly ‘er.” Shelia glared at Nanjala. This elicited an eye roll from the Azanjin woman.
“And how exactly did you end up meeting Wilcox?” I asked.
“‘E was the magistrate. Weren’t no way to not meet him. ‘E was always by the docks for this or that. Almost as much as you. Only ‘e didn’t drink so much.”
I gave Shelia a warning look. “And where do I find you with additional questions?”
“You know full well I work at the Whalin’ ‘Are.”
I vaguely recalled a tavern with a sign of a rabbit hefting a harpoon from the back of a rowboat. I didn’t recall it being anyplace I started any given evening.
“Very well,” I said. “For the time being, the Magistrate’s effects are still evidence in his murder, so I will not be releasing them until I’ve found his killer.”
“You can’t do that!” Shelia protested.
“Still a thief,” Nanjala sneered.
“You may leave,” I said coldly.
Nanjala turned with a huff, her raven braids striking the rim of Corinna’s parasol. Her sashay was probably a stride of long habit, as it was unlikely to be deliberate given her mood. Still, it accentuated her curves in a manner that drew attention. I turned my gaze to Shelia. She scowled and departed without me saying anything.
“I suppose there’s no reason for me to stay either,” Corinna said.
“If you wouldn’t mind, I would walk with you and ask my questions.”
“As you wish,” she said, turning. I hurried forward to stand on the side opposite the parasol.
“So, how did you come to know Magistrate Wilcox?”
“There are only so many notable families on this island, so all of the Royal officials appear on the social circuit. Thornton was a charming man, and I enjoyed his attention.”
“Do you know much about his background?”
“He came from a respectable family back in Atlor and spent some time as a mercenary. That’s not so unusual…”
“But?”
“But most mercenaries serve in the Twelve Rivers, or the Emerald Kingdoms, or the Volkmund. Thornton said he fought in the Southern Isles. It would explain where he learned the Azanjin language though.”
“I don’t suppose he spoke of his work much?”
“He always said it was not suitable for polite company. Since the magistrate has to deal with every criminal dreg on the island, I believed him.”
“So, no idea who might want him dead?”
“I’m not sure I knew him that well at all. He always acted very proper around me. But those two other women…” Corinna trailed off, glancing towards the gate at the northern end where Nanjala and Shelia had left.
“Was there anyone else in the magistrate’s social circle who might have known him better?”
Corinna thought for a moment, before shaking her head, sending her chestnut hair tumbling. “Not that I knew. He ran in the respectable circles, but I’m not sure he was particularly close to anyone else. But he did lie to me. I know that now.”
“Anyone he spent all that much time with?”
“He spoke to the guard captain frequently, but he would have to for work.” Corinna stopped walking, and I almost strode past her. “Might I ask you a question?”
“As long as it’s not about the Star of Azanjin.”
Corinna mulled her phrasing for a moment. “What does a Priest of Craddix actually do?”
“We provide the blessings of Craddix to land, livestock, and women.”
Corinna raised an eyebrow. “You are evading the question.”
“He is a god of fertility, but he exacts a high price for those boons. Most people would rather not make the trade.”
So…is a man who tries to juggle three women brave or foolhardy?
Yes.
Horny.
Some stop at two
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R3v_lnfQiS8
I would go with “a damn fool”.
Darn Daylight Savings time.
I got up early and reset 7 clocks, Mrs F will probably not reset the bedroom clock for a few days, until I remind her she has to catch a plane in a few days. Time is not of an essence here, usually.
I only have one clock to address – unfortunately, it’s the one that wakes me for work. It was also the one I was referencing for when the article dropped.
I went through the house and changed the active ones. I am a bit of a clock watcher, even in retirement, so it is kind of important to me.
The wife has never been on time for anything I know of, not sure if it matters to her.
Of all the great things about being me, being completely indifferent to time changes must be one of the top ones.
Don’t you have customers?
Yes, many very satisfied customers. They also benefit from my ability to effortlessly adapt to time changes.
I need the entry door to my garage replaced. Its old and the holes for the hinges are stripped out. Ive played the game of a wooden dowel, epoxy, maybe a golf tee. But after a couple of months, the top hinge still rips out. Id like to hire you, but I need to know how well you adapt to the semi-annual time change.
I don’t get half the hub-bub either. I *did* hate when in Eville it’d be dark by 4pm. All daylight spent inside school. But as for my body’s clock? Uh. Ya sleep when you can and ya wake up when ya set your alarm. It’s nighttime in your bedroom. Lights off, shades drawn. I don’t need much sleep and have easily adjusted from 1st, 2nd and pre-1st shifts.
My secret? Uh. I don’t have kids. *There’s* your problem.
Sheeeeiiit, any jackass can replace an entry door, the only problem you could have is if you order a custom door that is four inches too tall, but that hardly ever happens.
I’m a stack tester, not a carpenter. Ill pay you to fix my door since thats what you do. When you have a compliance issue with 40 CFR part 60 or part 63 give me a call.
And I’m sure we both have lawyers and accountants that dont do either of our jobs.
Oh- the garage was built in 1955 along with everything else. So yeah- non-standard opening.
Still has a McGovern sticker on one wall.
I’ve hung three doors.
First one was damn near perfect.
The second one, close enough.
Third. WTF?!
You would think I would have gotten better but noooooo
Talking about this with Mrs. Dean this morning, we decided that Congress will never do away with the time changes even though doing so would be popular, because nobody is paying them to do so.
I despise standard time. No need for it to be dark at 4 in the afternoon. I miss evenings.
If you live where it’s dark at 4 pm under standard time, it must be dark at 9 am under DST.
Winter Solstice sunset is at 4:22 sunrise is 7:15. So if we didn’t do the switch it would still be dark at 8:15. Which doesn’t really bother me as my mornings are shot getting to work anyway.
I second this.
Standard time stinks.
Hawaii doesn’t change time. but given our latitude the daylight difference between the summer and winter solstices is only ~1h30m.
Ninja Cat just vocally (and stridently, as it happens) reminded me that it’s WAY after dark, so it’s long past time for their nightly goo treat. He’s probably going to start pestering me for it as soon as I get home from work every day. 🙄🐱👤
I applaud your cat.
“…long past time for their nightly goo treat. He’s probably going to start pestering me for it as soon as I get home from work every day.”
You said it, soul sistah. Same as my fleshlight when *I* come home from work. They love that goo, they do do.
I used to know a woman whose orange cat would do something similar, but only for canned food.
So she named her cat ‘Canned Food’.
That last paragraph made me chortle.
Don’t read too much into it – what about it brought the amusement?
*don’t read too much into my inquiry.
I type gud.
The implication of unpleasant consequences.
Sex is a hilarious evolutionary gambit. Teo evo minions prep before their presentation to Satan:
‘Hey! Let’s trick mammals into having kids!’
‘How do we trick ’em into sacrificing countless time and resources into a creature that’ll die within a day on its own?! They’ *that* dumb?!
‘Oh, they do be that way, yo! It’s why we made sex so fun! And gave their spawn big, cute, googly -woogly eyes! They LOVE it! Throw in some shit about ‘meaning’ and ‘purpose,’ and they’ll keeping comin’ back back for more!’
‘Don’t they get really annoyed by all that time, energy, investment into creatures that croak young or end up useless leeches?!
‘DUH! That’s why they have so many of ’em! *swooon!*’
“Propah’,” His Darkness soon jived.
*Two evo minions
It do be like that.
“Wait until there’s an internet and they see porn”
Oh, and this is a fun one, UnCiv. I don’t usually try to follow the serialized fiction, but I am following this one.
I’m glad you’re enjoying it. I wrote this one to better fit the Glibs format.
Agreed, this is fun.
+1
Corinna has some fertile land that wants sowin’, that haughty lynx. Me no trust her.
Fun and good show-not-tell character reveals, or hints.
I also think this format length works better in glibspace.
🙄
Do you dribble semen everywhere you go, or is that our rare privilege?
I’m shopping for a mechanical watch. I’m nostalgic for my Stocker-Yale Sandy that I was issued.
We have some horologists here- any recommendations for $100-300 ?
I’m no expert, but in that price range you’re going to see a lot of Chinese make, which will have the longevity longevity you expect.
I would look at Seiko. They probably have some mechanicals that are in that range.
https://www.seikowatches.com/us-en/
For example:
https://www.amazon.com/SEIKO-SRPD55-Automatic-Watch-Water-Resistant/dp/B07ZJW4Q8P/ref=sr_1_1
If you don’t like the metal strap/bracelet, they are easy to replace with cloth (like mine now) or leather.
I was going to say a Hamiton, but they are twice what you want to spend.
This might work for you: https://www.amazon.com/RAINTEN-Chronograph-Mechanical-Stainless-R9032/dp/B0FFH45M8C/ref=sr_1_16?crid=5GHOKWI01IGI&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.8IHZ4lmN6lsBjUtOjgd9C1TSM6Ir6vwd_ZdiTyC31_Co-2OibdJTnsvL4a630sp2V4-Eo1gzCaqkMn0rt4glHK2yT0LPL1CKvSuUJoLD1-bZaRUIuOf1DU_kt4lac_eX0yg66rGkWOAxXrWiWl4XvbRBRLKDrQ90M-9imSu-w2Mo9qDzQpaRKxQ5CE5-86u3ZBNbiMMIa_VO_CHsMhj0uvcn9GIS1ka9NDR4LYtvTCPxUtHcjSpTSv5WWNeF04czWlqnvbv7P1ynpazF9Ht6DTY92YpqCiqHFomFNrT5ZmQ.njTC0Bz0UcuTUIyyv51ENNQy_-zvGqqcjpZNATRg8GU&dib_tag=se&keywords=mechanical%2Bwatch%2Bfor%2Bmen&qid=1762139045&sprefix=mechanical%2Bwatch%2Caps%2C281&sr=8-16&th=1
Deals on related products: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0F5VQNGCN/ref=sspa_dk_detail_0?pd_rd_i=B0F5VQNGCN&pd_rd_w=ZNUHm&content-id=amzn1.sym.85ceacba-39b1-4243-8f28-2e014f9512c7&pf_rd_p=85ceacba-39b1-4243-8f28-2e014f9512c7&pf_rd_r=KMKMVNF6TVQH3R1Q2ANX&pd_rd_wg=GQ2T8&pd_rd_r=fb4eb0a7-8667-4ccb-bfcc-da78d08673b9&sp_csd=d2lkZ2V0TmFtZT1zcF9kZXRhaWxfdGhlbWF0aWM&th=1
WhyTF is this watch so damn ugly? It looks like something tacky grandma’d wear cuz she fucking *loves* splotchy colors, like how she spends her free time staring at all the slot machines spinnin’ ’round her, cuz colorful spinny’s close to colorful splotch. (Needs more sound.)
I would say if you must stay in that price range, Seiko will have some longevity. Cheaper mechanical watches are easy to break, even from a waist high fall on a tile floor. You have to go up in range a bit to get a mechanical watch that is 1. Accurate without expensive adjustments and 2. Durable against bangs and bumps.
Seiko can just about manage to be durable and accurate for that price. Just keep the receipt. If it is inaccurate, return it. Don’t blow cash on adjustments. Get a different one.
I use an old Casio from before the turn of the century, they still make em, 12$
Classic
I haven’t worn a watch in 25 years. And that one I bought only because I had a date that night and didn’t want to miss it.
Laco has some basic automatics around $400.
HEYY BOYYY! FLAVA FLAV SMITH SELL CLOCK TO COOL HUMAN. THROW IN RAPE NO CHARGE.
Swatch of course.
Three hours of blowing leaves and already getting recovered before I finished. At least there’s less left up in the trees. Rain returns tomorrow.
$20, same as downtown?
I’m laughing because that was the twist I didn’t expect.
It’s more of a stroke with a twist thrown in.
Paying or paid?
https://www.pbs.org/newshour/nation/mississippi-woman-kills-escaped-rhesus-monkey-saying-she-feared-for-her-childrens-safety
Monkey down! I repeat, Monkey down!
Sup, my Glibs?
🐒🔫🪦
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bwa80DiPIHg
🎶🎶
Well if that excuse works for the cops….
Good morning, Sean, Ted’S., and U!
Morning.
How are you today?
Need to fix my sleep schedule that I screwed up. So I have to “not enough sleep” symptoms.
It’s an office day, so I’m in the office. No sleeping here, that’s against the rules.
My supervisor is out today, so I can’t get a request approved for work to be done on one of our systems until tomorrow.
I need to figure out what it is I’m forgetting to do. I have that nagging feeling but don’t know what I’m fretting over.
Did Not Adahn see this coming?
It’s an airport. Sometimes planes have trouble.
Did you see the dateline and the map on the page?
Neither loaded and I was on my way out for my morning commute.
If your point was the airport is right next to the gun club – we didn’t shoot down the plane either.
It’s not dark when the kids head off to the bus stop.
Something’s gone wrong. Kids are supposed to walk to school uphill both ways in the snow. What’s this bus stop and sunlight madness?
GM 🙂
ДУ
FDST!
Morning all. Trying to figure out how to slowly get the dogs stomachs in time with the new clock time. Their internal clocks are in synch with the sun. They are nagging the living hell out of me now. I will try to hold them off for half an hour or so.
Good morning, Suthen! I feel your pain. (See my comment above about our cats’ evening treat.)
😾
At least they aren’t monkeys.
“The Rhesus monkeys had been housed at the Tulane University National Biomedical Research Center in New Orleans, Louisiana, which routinely provides primates to scientific research organizations, according to the university. In a statement last week, Tulane said the monkeys do not belong to the university, and they were not being transported by the university.”
???
[Grant Enabled Paper Organization A] bought the monkeys with taxpayer dollars. Being nothing but a paper label, they were stored at [Grotesquely overfunded tax paraciste]’s physical location.
Assuming I’m reading that correctly.
Either way, you paid for it.
https://nypost.com/2025/11/03/us-news/mississippi-mom-shoots-dead-monkey-that-escaped-from-overturned-truck-to-protect-her-children/
Is that a Colonel Sanders tattoo?
Wrong type of monkey, Sanders only does Kentucky Fried Capuchins.
Capuchins are way more expensive.
““The days of the six-figure bounty hunters are over,” Queens City Councilman James Gennaro, who chairs the Environmental Committee, told The Post….
The Big Apple’s Citizen Idling Complaint Program was launched in 2019, with the city even recruiting ’80s punk rocker Billy Idol to promote the effort the next year…
But DEP officials said the anti-idling whistleblowers are focusing their attention on the city’s business core such as Midtown and lower Manhattan, wealthier Brooklyn neighborhoods and western Queens — not exactly the “environmental justice” communities” such as Harlem, the South Bronx, Brooklyn’s East New York and Brownsville and Staten Island’s North Shore…
Department of Environmental Commissioner Rohit Aggarwala last year told the council, “While we can and should pay people who do the service of reporting offenses, we do not need to make them millionaires.”
…
“The Department of Environmental Protection should let more people report illegal air pollution by fixing its ancient website, ending its discrimination against non-English-speaking New Yorkers, and hiring more workers to hold polluters accountable.””
https://nypost.com/2025/11/02/us-news/nyc-bounty-hunters-score-nearly-million-dollar-payouts-reporting-traffic-idling/
Fucking watermelons.
Studies have shown environmental activists release toxic levels of evil into the environment. Proper treatment requires sealing each individually in a sustainably sourced wooden box, stacking these in shipping containers, Placing the shipping containers in pits, and filling the pits with concrete above the top of the shipping containers.
Do you have a newsletter?
English is the official language now – learn it.
Or wait for the next Dem to change that on Day One.
lol Dumbass.
“We never expected our virtue signaling to turn around and bite us on the ass.”
We’re paying people to do stuff. But we didn’t expect them to do so much of it!
Dumbass is right.
Can we complain about all the idle people receiving government bennies?
Of course, as soon as they start handing out fines in CoCs like Harlem, the South Bronx, Brooklyn’s East New York and Brownsville and Staten Island’s North Shore, that will be racist and the snitches will be told to focus on the city’s business core such as Midtown and lower Manhattan, wealthier Brooklyn neighborhoods and western Queens
Climate justice!
If only we could export all that pollution to China.
“illegal air pollution ”
Legal air pollution is OK though.
Here, once you get car started on a winter’s day, it may run/idle all day.
Chronic aging seems to be the #1 cause of death, however.
Grrr…
So, made in china.
I don’t need a kitchen timer, I was looking for a regular clock. But this was so blatant it pissed me off.
Oh, c’mon. XKAWPC is a venerable old American company. I have no doubt this was made in their historic factory on the banks of the Hudson.
“Made in USA or Imported”
I love that shit. “Made in a facility that may process nuts.” Someone might be sneaking into the factory to make peanut butter when no one is looking?
Made in a facility that may process nuts.
Just go the sesame allergen route. Intentionally add it to products so you can be certain.
Does Trump know about this?
“They’re taking our boys’ jobs”
The product in question
If you look at the pictures, it becomes even more blatant. Does anyone in the US use “Anticlockwise”? It’s always been Counterclockwise, that alternate widdershins term is for foreigners.
Go with the dinosaur one.
https://www.amazon.com/ELE-DEPI-Mechanical-Dinosaur-Classroom/dp/B0CH4C3WD8
I was looking for an alarm clock, not a kitchen alarm timer.
Mornin’