The Hat and The Hair Animated-Ep 98-Iran So Far Away

by | Mar 25, 2026 | Hat and Hair | 42 comments

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CPRM

CPRM

Organic troll farmer.

42 Comments

  1. rhywun

    Hair’s weary groan… I feel it.

  2. DEG

    “I’m not that dumb”

    HAH!

  3. rhywun

    Satire is truly dead.

    “No human’s existence is illegal, and we quickly changed our wording to reflect that,” the student newspaper wrote, despite noting in its article that Medina-Medina “was living in the United States illegally,” according to the DHS.

  4. Evan from Evansville

    The Hair speaks the most wisdom, but I could party with USA.

  5. Evan from Evansville

    I didn’t get the memo (or forgot) that MLB began tonight a few hours ago, Yanks v San Fran Giants. Only on Netflix.

    No. I *have* Netflix and no. (This bodes poorly for me, especially in Chicago’s Blackout zone.) I don’t like the Yanks and hate the AL (guess it doesn’t matter, now, damn universal DH). And why a Wed? And why only one game and why on Netflix? (Cuz a$$holes, yes.)
    (I also saw the score.)

    Buffalo Sabres v Bruins is doing mighty fine. The former hasn’t been in the playoffs for 14yrs? Ouch. Go underdog, but they’ve been really good recently. I am quite content with this viewing experience. Fuck the Yanks. And fuck Judge. He fucking sucks in the playoffs. Like. Badly. That’s a shame.

    • rhywun

      Maybe I’ll check out baseball after 150 games or so.

      That recent baseball final was… unbelievably lame. Already mostly forgotten, it was so boring.

      • Evan from Evansville

        The Cubs 7 game series against the Brewers for the NL Championship was outstanding. We didn’t embarrass ourselves in any way. We just got outplayed. *tips hat* But fuck those fucks. The World Series went seven games. Wouldn’t call that lame. The winner was kinda obvious, but well-done TOR. You seem to have an affinity for the region. For non-geographic locations, it seems. I approve.

        I like the idea of Buffalo sports teams, just for the small-market underdoggedness. (Same for MIL, but fuck ’em.) TNT announcer said that since ~Dec 9 the Sabres had only lost 6 or 7 games in regulation. I also approve.

      • Evan from Evansville

        If you were talking about the Stupid McStuporson World Baseball Classic? Uh. Yes. Absolutely correct. Blegggggh.

      • rhywun

        I was talking about the WBC.

    • rhywun

      Huh. I had no idea the Sabres were doing well – because… when does that happen. Not paying much attention this year.

      • rhywun

        Oof… not a good year to be a Rangers fan.

      • R.J.

        Hockey or baseball?

      • rhywun

        Hawkey

      • rhywun

        This will not be a rebuild.

        LOL

        To be fair, the last two or three of those failed spectacularly so sure, let’s call it something else this time. 🙄

    • Evan from Evansville

      I just learned the Brewers have a player named JesĂșs Made.

      Huh. Interesting stamp of the family brand.

  6. Threedoor

    Is that Sidney Sweeney in white?

      • Threedoor

        Whose in red in the other picture?

      • R.J.

        Also
        Melania. The lady in white predates Sweeney mania. CPRM could say for sure.

  7. Furthest Blue pistoffnick (370HSSV)

    I filled out my time sheet on Satdee in Ultipro. There was a notice that I needed to acknowledge a document. Now Ultipro doesn’t let you read the document before you acknowledge it. You have to quit, find your documents folder, and look for unacknowledged documents. Stupid. Then I notice some other recently uploaded documents. One of them is a picture of my driver’s license and a picture of my passport.

    Am I crazy for not wanting pictures of my identity uploaded to Ultipro’s database?

    It’s not like Ultipro hasn’t been hacked before. https://krebsonsecurity.com/2014/04/tax-fraud-gang-targeted-healthcare-firms/

    “I’m uncomfortable having my DL and PP on Ultipro.”
    HR blew me off.
    “We are required by law to keep I-9 documentation.”
    OK, but my coworkers don’t have the same information uploaded. And do you need to keep that information on a proven insecure cloud?

    Am I crazy?

    • R.J.

      SUBMIT TO IDENTITY RAPE

      — Some guy named STEVE

    • Threedoor

      Crazy, no.
      And sadly all the major platforms are going to verification with pictures of your DL front and back. Everyone has all the data now, but gets freaked out when someone knows their address, I remember phonebooks. At least they didn’t have pictures

      • Fourscore

        After being the Employee of the Month, PONick, so many times, I’m sure the younger non-trans women have your trading cards with your home address.

    • Evan from Evansville

      Just commit some crime. You’ll be more like a Ford Pinto, that way.

      Invisible in plain sight. MORE than half the time, it works all the time. *wink*

  8. Fourscore

    “Am I crazy”

    Well, you are a glib. No judgment of course.

    • Threedoor

      Crazy, mad, insane, and criminally insane are more than mere semantics. Much like dork, geek, and nerd are different.

    • Furthest Blue pistoffnick (370HSSV)

      I hang out with you lot. I must be crazy.

      • Fourscore

        You’re gonna need more rhubarb. Luckily I’ve got connections.

      • Furthest Blue pistoffnick (370HSSV)

        I do need more rhubarb. The last stuff you gave me doesn’t like where I planted it.

  9. Gustave Lytton

    The sad part is Trump won’t realize how much he fucked away two terms of a presidency and will think he was the bestest president ever.

  10. Gustave Lytton

    Can’t wait for 5-10 years where Tulsi comes up her side of things. Will it be

    1) I was trying to change things from the inside.

    2) I was locked to WH tunnels while a doppelgÀnger impersonated me

    3) being a warmonger isn’t that bad. Try the koolaid!

    4) like George Romney, I was brainwashed

  11. Evan from Evansville

    Thought on Iran: (I don’t like it and wish we hadn’t stuck US dick in that hornets nest. Get that out of the way and look from 30k feet.)
    If I’m reading it in a certain light, picked up from a few articles linked to from here, this is so-far, really well-played 3d Chess.

    Maduro was a demonstration of power, and apparently a bit of a mystery weapon, that showed wtf the US military can do. That others can’t. If we want to. Iran: The same with Khomeini, and double-double -plus GORGEOUS was Israel(+US) bombing the ‘election’ gathering of Upper Ups the next day. I’ll ignore the Persians finding a new leader for another time. But: Closing the strait hurts China and Asia far worse than it did us. By using Iran, partly to give Their People a chance to get a new govt… we hurt China indirectly and show we can fuck with them without actually touching China.

    I don’t want to poke China, but they’re out for BigBig Things globally, and I don’t trust ’em to play nice. I would like our Risk board to have more security from them. Hurting them, a bit of show you who’s boss, and fucking with them through sea trade.. mocking them with our Bluewater navy, another big demonstration of power, show-not-do.

    If I’m putting a positive spin on this, and I am cuz I’d rather not be there, I can see this as a wise use of demonstrative power to a) show China what we can do, and b) get some kinda good shit done at the same time.

    Ignoring future ramifications of this Risk move, I’m impressed. Hrm? *seals self in impenetrable (but comfy) dome of blankets*

  12. Derpetologist

    Trump has a list of 15 demands (not yet made public). The Iranians responded with these 5 on state TV:

    ***
    A complete halt to “aggression and assassinations.”

    Establishment of concrete mechanisms to ensure the war on Iran does not resume.

    Guaranteed and clearly defined payment of war damages and reparations.

    The condition that the war is concluded across all fronts and for all Iranian proxies throughout the region (which would require an end to Israel’s attacks on Lebanon that are targeting Hezbollah).

    Guarantee that Iran can exercise sovereignty over the Strait of Hormuz and that its legal right to the strait is recognized.
    ***

    https://www.cnn.com/2026/03/25/world/live-news/iran-war-us-israel-trump-03-25-26?post-id=cmn669b77000m3b6to1hwgv83

    I don’t see Trump agreeing to any of that.

    • Evan from Evansville

      *hands on hips* “Stop assassinating us! Just stop it! And pay us for your previous assassinations! You naughty boy!”

      I wonder if China + India will take interest in controlling the strait.

    • rhywun

      I remember when the loser had to pay reparations. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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