This is Warty’s fault.
Howdy Glibertariat! I hope today finds you happy and mask free. Ha!
Give ’em hell, Joe! Don’t forget the onion for your belt.
That’s a bold strategy, Cotton.
This would have caused all hell to break loose.
Last week I posted Black Water from the Doobies. Gender Traitor replied with this.
Why do you have such a negative reaction to the claustrophobic buried-alive experiment?
I repeat myself. https://www.complete-hitchcock.com/web_images/ahhs2e18_banner.jpg
Michael McDonald era DB’s is the best DB’s, I said it and I stand by it.
McDonald was on LyleLovett.com a few Fridays ago and it did not suck. I think he was touring with Steely Dan four years ago.
There are some guys who seem so comfy on the keys like him, which reminds me: I miss Leon Russell and Dr John.
RIP
If you’re not familiar with him already check out Victor Wainwright.
Do you own a yacht, Hyperbole? Because it sounds like you prefer Yacht Rock to straight ahead guitar jamming rock ‘n’ roll.
I like Felo over the other German brand screwdrivers.
I didn’t need to know that.
Screwdrivers are one of the few things Snap On still makes better than anyone else. I’ve used decent euro-trash tools and older Snap On is still better.
All my screwdrivers were so old, the Phillips would barely hold a screw anymore.
Yeah, Wera’s are decent. Crappy screwdrivers are actually worse than none. Grat’s on the set.
Every firehouse I worked in had a tool chest full of Snap-On tools. I know them well.
JIS screwdrivers can do wonders on not cramming out JIS screws, if you have any JDM manufacture. And on non-JIS screws.
I need to make rounds of pawn shops again and see if I can pick up some more old stock Snapons.
Would that make them Snapawns?
I like it!
That’s what I call PWN’D!
Snapons. Strapons. At this point what difference does it make?
Snapon Strapons. Market that.
I have used a lot of Snap-on over the years, but the only thing from them that still gets used in retirement is dial-type torque wrenches.
Cornwell makes better ratches, Proto make better sockets and wrenches, Klein makes better pliers
/shrug. Snap-on was great when the truck was the only source of good tools, but if you are a field tech, industrial supply houses are the place you are going to be. So, Proto.
The airport supplies us with Proto tools. I have a massive rollaway Matco box full of Snap On tools and I wish I could agree with you. I can’t. Snap On has slipped in quality the last decade or so, but they’re still way better than almost anybody. Klien is perfectly acceptable for pliers and probably makes some of SO’s. Cornwell is decent. Mac is better. Matco is probably about the same as most Cornwell tools. Proto is barely better than Craftsman, just barely. I look forward to working at home because of my tools. I get saving money on the purchase price, but if you’re gonna have these tools in your hand all day, get the best you can afford and then work harder so you can afford even better. Cheap tools are basically suffering needlessly.
Different strokes I guess.
I have never been impressed with SO tools, won’t touch MAC or Matco as they have been crap for way too long.
I have never used anything better than Proto for hand tools, way better than Craftsman. But I do love some Klein dykes.
I have a Snappy box out in my garage, a KR657 I bought for $25. Now they just want to sell you a mortgage on a triple bank. I mean, they are better than Harbor Freight, but just barely.
“When Angermayer went on a trip to the Caribbean with some close friends in 2015, he gave shrooms a try. The experience, the billionaire said, “was the single most meaningful thing I’ve done in my whole life.”
In the ego death of his hallucinations, Angermayer “finally understood Bitcoin.””
Then how come hippies can’t understand basic math?
Since when do hippies become billionaires?
Sounds more like the billionaire became a hippie.
Because math is racist and a symbol of the oppressivness and prevalency of white Supremacy.
I hope today finds you happy and mask free.
Lunch mask-free at a restaurant where the staff are ignoring the still-existing business restrictions. Yes.
“The American people honor all those Armenians who perished in the genocide that began 106 years ago today,” Biden said in a written statement timed to Saturday’s commemoration of Armenian Genocide Remembrance Day.
“One and a half million Armenians were deported, massacred, or marched to their deaths in a campaign of extermination,” Biden said. “We remember the lives of all those who died in the Ottoman-era Armenian genocide and recommit ourselves to preventing such an atrocity from ever again occurring.”
Biden got something right? WTF?
The Doobie Brothers song is good.
why didn’t OMB do this starting back in 2017? Did he care if it pissed off Turkey? Wasn’t OMB always pissing off NATO and our allies anyway?
Yes but without any plan.
Re: the US and the Tokyo Olympics – IDGAF but if Japan wants to look professional even if there aren’t fans in the stadium – good for them.
I do think we should be boycotting the Chinese Winter Olympics though.
I think we are far too chicken to do it.
^^ This gai gets it.
It wouldn’t help anyway. The Chinese aren’t going to say, ” Well, the Americans didn’t show up. I guess we have to change!” All it would do is screw over the athletes others who make money off of it.
They’ll rejoice when the win all the events.
Might make it easier to “fortify” the games.
Ah, rumblings of attempts to use military aircraft against civilians. Totes not a banana republic.
Its not too different than an air show. The Thunderbirds to the lovely barrel roll in the diamond formation drawing the oohs and and from the crowd. Meanwhile the asshole spending the whole show upside down hits the afterburner from behind the crowd to scare the shit out of everyone.
Unless they start tapping the trigger, then its another ballgame.
According to the sources, an F-15C fighter was put on alert, which raised concerns among Guard members that the jet could be used to “buzz” crowds — a tactic often used in combat zones to disperse the enemy.
“Buzz” with munitions?
Founders haz Assad
It’s the Jim Eagle of purpose built air-superiority fighters.
>:-|
“For 40 days and 40 nights,”
So Lent, basically.
Relevant.
75% Relevant
That’s what they give you!
Fucking waste of time!
Well, maybe it wasn’t really wasted!
Freddie was 7 days older than I, until he wasn’t.
Sounds horrible.
“California National Guard members say a fighter jet was put on standby for a “possible domestic mission” last year, raising concerns that the military could be used to disperse protesters in the early days of the coronavirus pandemic, according to a report.
Four National Guard sources spoke to the Los Angeles Times about the matter, revealing that commanders were concerned about resistance to stay-at-home orders or chaos due to panic-buying.
According to the sources, an F-15C fighter was put on alert, which raised concerns among Guard members that the jet could be used to “buzz” crowds — a tactic often used in combat zones to disperse the enemy.”
WTF?
Which one of these protests do they think they were gonna buzz the rioters at? Really? This is extra stupid. A fucking F15 is going to break up a BLM/Antifa riot? Fuck you!
They overestimated the cantankerousness of the American public it seems. Most took the old gubmint schlong up the pooper pretty quietly.
Troof.
From my greasy, dead hands…
But, worse yet, in addition to changing the kind of cars we drive and how we heat our homes, Biden’s plan may force Americans to limit our consumption of red meat.
That’s right, in Biden’s version of America, you might have to cut your consumption of red by a whopping 90 percent. According to a study from Michigan University’s Center for Sustainable Systems, to meet the changes proposed by Joe Biden, Americans would only be allowed to consume four pounds of red meat annually.
To put that in perspective, your red meat consumption would be limited to one typical hamburger per month.
Imagine being limited to one burger a month, and not being able to eat red meat. Will the government require us to have Red Meat Passports to ensure we don’t go over our quota of red meat?
Red meat is my red line. I hope the admin and its globalist allies make the wise and correct choice on this matter…
Why don’t you go fuck yourself, Tommy.
#metoo
Picked up four local raised steaks this afternoon. Two strips and two ribeyes.
I’ve got a porterhouse (for me), and a strip (for the girlfriend) thawing in the fridge for tomorrow.
I have beef give or take 3+ days a week. Beef was for tonight’s dinner.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=nZoyE1B7HHA
I think I have some burgers, a couple strips, and a couple sirloins (and assorted bacon/sausage) in the freezer. I should pick up some ribeyes on the next grocery trip.
I had a lovely burger for my lunch today. The Willow Trading Post has something they call a Hangover Burger, which certainly lives up to its name and a good thing, as I overindulged a little last night.
And, the more these assholes try to limit my red meat consumption, the more read meat I’ll eat. Fuck those assholes, right in the neck.
So we’re going to destroy the fast food industry as well? Not buying it. Too much influence and money flowing from them to allow this.
Lobbyists aren’t completely useless.
All of it except you know who.
You motherfucker, knew what it was before I even clicked the link…ha!
That is why they have been working on the meatless burgers. And bacon.
If they’re going to attempt to make me eat less red meat – for my own good – they’re gonna have to show me the science that…. ah… yeah, I see where this is going.
What is that tool kit?
Looks like a Wera screwdriver kit.
It’s a 17 piece driver kit from Wera. With bottle opener and coasters.
OK, thanks.
Heh.
thicc?
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-9506757/Demi-Rose-flaunts-ample-assets-orange-bikini.html
Poor lass and her frozen yogurt trials: will she never be set free?
Er, wrong Demi, sorry.
Nope. Curvaceous figure.
Too petite for my tastes.
She needs a couple burgers from Wendy’s, and maybe some pizza hut.
Pizza Hut would make sense, as she already looks like a Hutt.
“Tesla CEO Elon Musk will attempt to flex his comedic prowess as he makes his hosting debut on Saturday Night Live on May 8.
The longtime NBC variety show made the announcement via social media as they shared a photo with Musk’s name alongside Miley Cyrus — who was tapped as musical guest — captioning the image ‘Musk See TV.’ ”
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-9507813/Elon-Musk-tapped-host-Saturday-Night-Live-musical-guest-Miley-Cyrus.html
Miley Cyrus — who was tapped
Would not.
She’s like a sexual Tragedy of the Commons.
Lol ?
SNL is still a thing?
Wasn’t that something that was on back in the Seventies?
Didn’t they cancel it ages ago for being painfully unfunny?
Being painfully unfunny is a reason to cancel shows? Then explain the latest seasons of Simpsons and Family Guy.
Dave Barry had the most logical explanation – space aliens insist on watching our unfunny shows and we have to appease them or else experience their space-lasers.
So… the Futurama defense?
/hums the Single Female Lawyer theme
Well, as the single female lawyer would confirm, you can’t copyright an idea, but Dave Barry had it first.
Didn’t they cancel it ages ago for being painfully unfunny?
You’re thinking of the anti-Universe, where everything makes sense; we’re the Universe, where nothing does.
Pray that the two Universes never touch.
Lordy, the comments over there. I don’t get the Musk hate, there are plenty of rich folks out there who are far more deserving of being reviled.
Still masks required here in the mediocre state of Ohio. At least until we get down to under 50 cases per 100,000 residents (or enough vaccinated people, or DeWine faces enough backlash, or the legislature acts on the bill that allowed them to override his health orders…).
It’s Saturday, so here’s the link to the Zoom/Happy Hour/Home Improvement discussion that will be kicked off at 20:00 Eastern.
“‘Caitlyn Jenner is to trans Americans what Candace Owens is to black Americans’: Republican reality star faces backlash over ‘vanity campaign’ to be California’s next governor”
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9506971/Caitlyn-Jenner-faces-backlash-LGBTQ-community-bid-Californias-governor.html
If she wins, she should run for POTUS with Tim Scott.
‘Caitlyn Jenner is to trans Americans what Candace Owens is to black Americans’
A leading target of leftist bigotry from said demographic?
A leading target of pasty-white leftist bigotry.
from said demographic?Yeah, I wrote that funny.
I just read his statement announcing his run and he didn’t seem all that much like he was pushing the hormone overdose thing at all. I can’t remember him mentioning it at all. Besides, isn’t this what they said about Arnie’s bid?
That’s some serious memory-holing.
I’m old enough to remember when Jenner was a courageous pioneer who inspired all transfolk.
I remember when he was on Wheaties boxes.
That was the last time he ran for something!
Caitlyn Jenner would be miles better than Newsome who’s second in crappiness only to New York’s Governor Lugosi.
“Allow transphobia to go unchecked!” Who cares? Phobia is an irrational fear. Does it matter if somebody irrationally fears you? No, it really doesn’t. Besides, it’s strongly looks like you have an irrational fear of Bruce Jenner, to me.
Don’t care about the trans or Trump positions, but I object to the vehicular manslaughter. Probably will drop out so theoretical anyway.
Yeah, I kind of forgot about that one.
I had forgotten about that. Was Jenner drunk or was it just general driving stupidly?
I think it was raining and I don’t remember other contributing factors.
He had a trailer, which can make it really hard to stop. And it was on PCH in Malibu where lots of accident happen. Assuming I am remembering correctly.
Rings a bell.
AND, body dismorphia is a serious mental disease. Probably not any worse than the other politicians with thier narcissism and delusions of grandeur, but still, a mental disease ought to be a dead no for election.
I don’t see how, especially since she already transitioned.
No. If a person believes they are actually the opposite sex from what they are, hormones and surgeries do not mitigate the fact that they have a mental disorder and the stats on how many of them commit suicide and have huge problems seems to bear that out.
Expense alone is probably why Trump tried to keep them out of the military.
Yeah, and why put the normal troops through all of the drama? We just want them to fight and win, not wrestle with all of the questions a trans person would pose for them. I’m pretty sure the generals told him it was a huge problem and he made the decision based on that.
Just create a rainbow division, move all of them into it, and station it someplace like arctic greenland.
If I remember right, even after surgery transpeople require regular hormone therapy and have issues without getting those hormones. Getting those drugs to people in the field is an issue.
Deferring to the generals/ admirals has long made sense to me.
They believe they are the opposite gender of their sex, and although people transition for different reasons, sexual dimorphism is a good explanation for gender disphoria. Brains can be sorted into two categories “male” and “female”. So if someone with an opposite sexed brain transitions, then it mitigates that disphoria because there is no longer that mismatch.
Regardless, it’s a not a personality disorder.
The suicide thing is largely due to a lack of social acceptance.
a
That’s from the Mayo Clinic. It is a mental disorder and it’s pretty obvious. If we have a group of people who are diagnosed as having a mental disorder and have a way higher rate of suicide, it doesn’t make a lot of sense to me to blame it on the bigots out there somewhere. There are fucked up people everywhere and they mess with people from every subset of society.
And, no amount of physical alterations will fix somebodies mind. I feel for these people and the suffering they go through. But adjusting their appearance into the opposite sex that they think they want to be doesn’t seem like a realistic way to address what’s wrong with them. I’m not sure what is, but I hope we can figure it out and prevent more tragedies. It pisses me off to no end that their plight has been hijacked for political reasons and a bunch of people are pretending to have the same problem just for attention.
Create a rainbow division? Create? And from a NY resident. What do they teach kids these days?
Just saying it’s a “mental disorder” isn’t much of a point.
The technology doesn’t exist to change the “sex” of someone’s brain. However, transitioning — including things like plastic surgery — does change their “mind” in regards to the thoughts and feelings they have. It also changes how others see them and how they see themselves.
“It pisses me off to no end that their plight has been hijacked for political reasons and a bunch of people are pretending to have the same problem just for attention.”
I agree.
Yes, Gustave, create, not replace.
There can be only one!
Besides, from what I hear, Troy isn’t all that different from Arctic Greenland.
Sounds better than Rachel whosit.
“Republican reality star doesn’t face backlash from non-leftist trash” is an equally valid – actually, more valid – headline that didn’t make it into the news for some reason I can’t possibly understand.
At least they’re not handing out Bibles, that would be gross.
https://www.foxnews.com/politics/kamala-harris-southern-border-migrant-kids-veeps-book
Totes not a banana republic
OFFS
Gotta get them properly propagandized, I guess.
‘“One and a half million Armenians were deported, massacred, or marched to their deaths in a campaign of extermination,” Biden said. “We remember the lives of all those who died in the Ottoman-era Armenian genocide and recommit ourselves to preventing such an atrocity from ever again occurring.”’
Good for Joe for getting one right…now do the Uyghurs.
Yep, should have been done long ago.
Now, I personally would say that genocide, as a recognized category of crime, didn’t exist until the 1948 genocide treaty. Before then, the only applicable term would be murder, lots and lots of murder.
I wish we could go back to just calling murder, murder.
HaH! Like sleepy Joe’s gonna go up against his paycheck like that. You crack me up.
Yeah, this is suspicious. Why now, why him? Because he has a conscience? No damn way. He’s being set up.
Cenk Uygur hardest hit.
Who caused the bruises, Jimmy Dore?
“Good for Joe for getting one right”
But why now? Are we fighting the Turks in Syria or something?
He was given an unscreened check list by his one of his many handlers and just read what was in front of him?
Haha yes.
Perhaps 100 years from now the current president can say something about the Uighurs.
You know…. if it’s safe.
I vaguely remember Trump wanting to do this and either Congress or US allies asked him not to.
True courage this country.
https://youtu.be/MuaOY5QmvJk
Gun Jesus and friends do Heat themed shoot.
I was evacuated in the North Hollywood shootout. My wife’s (then girlfriend) apartment was just over the wall from the garage that they flattened with the tank. I was watching the news and the shooters would let off some rounds and a few seconds later the report would come through the window. Then, the helicopter would swerve around and the chop of the rotors would come through the windows as the TV showed the same movement. Eventually, the police helicopter hovered over the courtyard of the building I was in and called out over the loudspeaker, ” There’s no chance of escape! Come out with your hands up!” I looked out over the balcony and everyone was streaming out of the building. I went outside and the cops shoo’ed us all down the street. That’s when I realized my wallet and keys were still upstairs. I sat on the curb at a philly steak sandwich shop all day. The sandwich shop fed us and the news came and interviewed us. At around 8:00 o’clock, my girlfriend came home and she had her niece and nephew ( 4 and 6) with her. she convinced the cops to let us into her apt, but first they entered it and searched for perps. They say the shooters were inspired by the movie.
Sounds tiring, your life. But you do have stories.
Right? It’s almost like NA’s horoscopes are accurate or something!
What? I thought Heat was inspired by N Hollywood Shootout – that was late 80s or early 90s before the movie.
Heat was 1995. The North Hollywood shootout was February of 1997.
Ok, positive heat was inspired by an actual event.
I went over where it happened the next day. The curbs were all chipped to hell. The gun store down the street, which supplies AR’s to the cops, was all full of stories. The shopping center across the street from the bank was being remodeled and the guys in there said they all jumped on the manlift and raised it as high as it would go. There was hundreds of holes in the window board ups. Eventually, the city drove the gun store out of business. I worked on a bike for the big shot bike cop from LAPD and he was tasked with testing the AR mount for motorcycles. I can’t overstate how many chips there were on the walls and curbs. Literally, thousands. That branch was actually my bank at the time, which was my first moment of recognition watching the breaking news on TV. Like, ” Hey! That’s my bank!”
*supplied. When the cops realized they were out gunned, they went to the gun store and “borrowed” a bunch of AR’s. Later the city ran the gun shop out of town.
It was called B&B sales maybe a mile south of the bank. Cool store. until the bastards killed it.
https://www.orlandosentinel.com/opinion/guest-commentary/os-op-mark-omara-derek-chauvin-convictions-20210422-v2t6fisdhnctdcqum2zm22y7hi-story.html
I wonder what political office this cat is angling for…
“Our policing system suffers from a lack of adequate funding, a lack of de-escalation training, and a lack of awareness that we all carry subtle, undeniable, and sometimes deadly biases against certain segments of our community.”
As I suspected, they don’t want to defund the police, just make it woker.
More money, more training, the same formula we get with the public schools.
If more money doesn’t help, then they’ll try increased resources. If that doesn’t work, they’ll try greater investment.
Misdiagnose the problem, give them money, repeat.
fast-forwarding through a between-innings announcement about my team’s hiring a diversity and inclusion consultant
Michael Wilbon is always attacking me and the other “shut up and dribble” crowd, but, it’s not fair. Not only do I not GAF about what your league and players think, generally IDGAF about what anyone thinks. Do they think I enjoy lectures while waiting in line in a deli, while walking the aisles of a hardware store? Fuck no and fuck off: who asked you.
If you think you want to improve yourselves in some way, good on you: do it and then quietly lead by example. But don’t lecture your customers. . . . . ever . . . . . . about anything . . . . . I meaning fucking ever.
This crap is really draining my enjoyment of sports. I watched a small fraction of NFL games last season compared to what I watched for decades. I won’t watch an NBA game. I swear these leagues are self-destructive.
Silicone Saturday is also liquid sunshine.
https://archive.li/c0LaW
Indeed. *chef’s kiss *
15, ’cause I like the athletic types.
28 for the lols
Lots of talent in the whole set.
Im off to work (an hour early), kids.
Don’t let the Zoom call become an OnlyFans. Or if so, record that ish.
Tres-OUT!
RE: Senile Joe and the Armenian Genocide.
I pride myself on being able to give credit where it’s due and I admit that Senile Joe deserves it in this case (or his handlers do in any case).
And Erdogan can go fuck himself.
I would give Joe credit if I actually thought he was in charge of his faculties.
Instead, I am completely squeamish about handlers running crap through him without any real supervision.
This, that dude isn’t even certain what day it is. he did this at someone else’s behest and they only ordered it because they think it’ll help the worker’s revolution.
I think this is one of the very few times Slow Joe actually spoke under his own volition. And I will bet his handlers are shitting themselves over it.
“Biden’s statements are not the official policy of this administration.”
“In the ego death of his hallucinations, Angermayer “finally understood Bitcoin.””
This might be the single greatest sentence ever written.
With enlightenment that awesome, I thought people stopped caring about money?
Yeah, just ask Peter Green’s Ghost.
He probably just thought he did.
Fritz Lang can do no wrong i tells ya
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=xcARqkXXrX8
M
Fury.
Haven’t seen fury yet, but M is an awesome flick – are you implying otherwise?
No; I just wanted to name a lesser-known Lang picture.
Of course, Fury was made at MGM, so the social commentary is a bit muted. Watch it in a double feature with the non-Lang They Won’t Forget.
Lana!
(speaking of below. ?)
I really like Fury tp the point that I acquired a copy and watch bits of it from time to time. I like the feel of the movie – back when being in the military was a world of canvas, leather, and steel. I served in the very tail end of that era as a young man and the movie does a good job portraying that.
There’s a bit of a plot hole in the movie which could have been covered with a few changes but overall it’s an OK flick.
You must be thinking of the Kirk Douglas/Amy Irving movie.
Not sure what you’re on about.
The “Fury” movie with Brad Pitt really felt well “dated” for 21st century hollywood. Of course I’m not saying it looked like movies made 70-90 years ago, but they made it feel like life in the military of that era.
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0027652/ Haven’t seen that.
I rather like this alphetical format for April.
uh, alphabetical ?.
My my how times have changed. TEH YOOTZ are such that women must exaggerate how many partners they’ve had? What has happened to the world?
https://www.thesun.co.uk/dear-deidre/14752447/lied-about-number-of-partners/
Assuming this isn’t just more creative fiction, I don’t know why one would lie about a lack of virtue to exaggerate how much they lack it.
Because lack of virtue is a virtue these days.
(a) it allegedly backfired in this case, and (b) it’s the Sun, why aren’t you linking to p. 3?
As a Sun reader, I don’t care who runs the country…
Sun readers don’t care who’s running the country, as long as she’s got big tits.
She’s the kind of a girl that makes the “News of the World”
Ask and you shall receive.
https://archive.li/YHSxJ/d4d0922299459ea74be66bea4b975f769bf5c34a.jpg
NSFW.
Those look natural.
Am not being sarcastic. Crowd around!
Your wish is my command.
The U.K. is toast and so is Australia. It’s up to us now, and I don’t have high hopes.
I just had a three beer idea. I think it would be fun open post to hear what people think are the most dangerous things they have ever done. No need to test the statute of limitations but I bet there are thousands of super interesting and unbelievable stories. Just an idea I’m throwing out there.
Intentionally?
Up to you. That’s the beauty. It could be dog fights, breaking and entering, free soloing, working for the state of NY. Whatever floats your boat. Folks here are great story tellers
Sounds fun. Forum?
Unfortunately I’m retarded and don’t know how to do anything. I’m not super familiar with the forum, how it works and why it exists. I just thought it would be a fun open post idea
Login is same as here. See menu above.
The three-bar thing.
You seem to be pretty smart for a baby.
Meh, I’m very childish.
I would tell you mine, but, A: I have a hard time assigning “most” dangerous to any one story and B: TOG will note her astonishment at yet another tale of craziness.
I won’t. I promise to say mmrfng.
Sorry to have made you feel self-conscious. I will retire to under the bed now.
“I like you, Harvey; I’m on your side.”
I do like your stories! sheesh!
I don’t feel self conscious. You are a welcome and interesting commenter. I’m just being facetious.
Glad to hear it.
I guess I just want to hear blackjack stories from growing up in Cali when it was fun. Also, moar Suthen. Throw in a fourscore story and something from one of the bears. I dont care if it’s a glory hole or fishing hole. Y’all are interesting
Anyone got a copy of (OOP) Fast Times at Ridgemont High?
Bonny happy wee bairn, TNT.
Alright. From a dangerous standpoint this one’s up there. Around 1978, my brother and I got the wild idea to sell some bogus acid to some Seabees. We lived about four blocks from Hueneme Seabee base and there was a group of sailors trying to buy acid. We didn’t have any, so we concocted this scheme.
We went to the art store and bought india ink and construction paper. At home, we laid out a grid and used a pizza roller to perforate the lines. Then we put a single drop of india ink in the center of each square. When the Seabees came back, we told them it was acid. Bear in mind, this was at our actual house ( we were really stupid about this.) So, we sold them like ten hits at 3 bucks apiece. They left and that was that.
The next weekend, there’s a knock at the door, 12 y/o me and my 14 y/o brother answer it and there these four Seabees. There’s the usual small talk for a few seconds and then they ask if we have any more acid! Three of them raved about it. One said he locked himself in a closet and saw fire. The last guy was the only one who didn’t think he felt anything. We sold them 10 more hits and that was that. Probably not the most dangerous thing I’ve done, but quite scary. I thought they came back to kill us or at least beat us senseless.
Yes! This is what I’m talking about. My uncle was a Seabee. He is notorious in our family for being a huge liar. He also served 20 years and fought in Vietnam. I love the shit out of him. Taught me how to shoot a handgun.
Well, it’s possible that I owe him 60 bucks.
Agreed. Lots of interesting Glib stories. Still
okhappy withwastedboring life.Anthony Cumia has some great stories about coming of age in San Juan Capistrano.
Not that interesting, really, but a fun, stupid story.
Full out headed north on 35W toward downtown in my 1984 RX-7 GSL-SE. Middle of the afternoon. Some other dude in a Porsche and I were weaving traffic together and going pretty good. I saw 110 and then didn’t look down again. We got clear of traffic and he walked away. Wherever that car is now, the passenger side grab handle is permanently crushed by my unfortunate pal’s grip. He wasn’t pleased.
I had an ’85. I used to get off the freeway and just leave it in 5th. I’d slow all the way down to maybe 10 mph and then mash it when the light changed, still in 5th. It took a while but it would finally get back up to speed. It never vibrated at all during this. I could have had a glass of water on the dash and none of it would spill. Amazing.
Selling that car ranks among my dumbest decisions.
No incriminating stories but this is great. I was exiting the beltway in MD and a homeless person was begging for money on the ramp and didn’t see the light was green. Long story short I had to get a new car and move to Ohio. Judge said living in Ohio was punishment enough and he sentenced me to 14 years of being near Detroit.
I’m just going to chime in with “blackjack wins the thread” in advance.
My buddy wanted to learn how to drive a manual transmission. So I taught him in my bright orange 1976 Ford Pinto station wagon. Then, I car-surfed on top while he drove down a “minimum maintenance gravel road”.
In the existing vein of “not really that exciting” – late 80’s, parents stumbled into a 1976 BMW 3.0L (looked just like this) that had been directly imported (instrumentation was still in German, aside from the speedo cards). A rather zippy 4 door, I decided to see just how zippy early one morning on my way to work on the Seaford-Oyster Bay Expressway.
I gave up around 125 MPH, since my exit came up really, really quickly.
My parents sold that car the next year when I was at school – in retrospect I really wish I had bought it off of them. It was cool AF.
I was the boat house director at a YMCA summer camp in northern Minnesoda. We got a call that one of our canoes was at the North end of the lake. So I took another friend and a rope in the crash boat to pick it up. On the way back, I opened the throttled up. My friend was in the canoe, holding on to the rope for dear life. I turned a corner a little too sharp. He missed a moored sailboat by inches.
Also, I once jumped off ~ 70 foot cliff into a quarry. Sneakers were highly recommended, to deal with the impact of your feet hitting the water. Does that count?
Drunkenly almost getting my ass kicked by some gang members?
Drunkenly running around the roof of the Prudential Center? (the mall part, not the 850 foot tower itself)
Drunken shenanigans in a Boston Whaler, at night, with faulty lights? (man, we got so very, very close to being t-boned at speed)
I _did_ miss being chased around a different Boston Whaler with a knife by my friend who took _way_ too much acid (something like this) . I was super pissed at my friends who “blew my off” that day, then I was super happy when I found out why they never met me as planned.
I know, I know, blackjack wins *kicks rock*
(and, again, I “Slumbrew it” by seeing the typo right after I hit “Post Comment”)
Climbing between moving train cars in the pouring rain.
Do tell
Hitchhiking solo through South America at 22. One town in particular, Piura, in north Peru was a Sendero Luminoso (Marxist guerrilla group) stronghold. I got looks that could melt glass going through that place. Had a gun out to my head in Brazil by a cop that thought we were thieves. Got deported from Brazil. Got drugged in Brazil.
Deets on all of those would make great articles.
Sendero Luminos == Shining Path, unless my shitty Spanish is shittier than I thought?
I should get off my ass and finally write an article. Yes indeed, Shining Path. I later talked to a guy who had a very bad experience in the same town a few months earlier. I was used to getting weird looks by that point, this was something else. The group was famous for kidnapping and killing gringos and that was one of their strongholds. Hair on my neck was standing up in that place.
Closest to death was probably catching cholera in a shithole town in Colombia. 104 fever alone in a hovel, hallucinations coming after the first couple days. I somehow finally made it to a clinic where they put me on a table next to some guy screaming his head off. They gave me a shot of something and three IV bags. I felt like I woke up from a nightmare. Lost thirty pounds that month and I was already a skinny guy.
Please write something, sounds like you’ve got some amazing stories.
You are making my point. I screwed a few girls I shouldn’t have, trespassed a couple times. Didn’t file taxes for 5 years, the usual. Used my car as a hotbox for 15 years, robbed almost every employer I had….etc. I’m small time
Didn’t file taxes for 5 years
I’m interested in how that worked out.
robbed almost every employer I had
TBF, I really don’t need this many Post-It note pads.
Ok, if you’re asking for stories…
It was my first week in Brazil and I was planning on staying for a year and finding a job teaching English somewhere in the country. I showed up with a friend from the Bay who was gonna stay with me for the first two weeks and then head home. We rented an old apartment in Rio and on the third morning there a bunch of shots rang out from below us. Sure enough the cops killed a guy across the street from our place. I watched him bleed out and die on the sidewalk with my buddy.
That night we were looking to really get after it. So we went to this seedy bar and proceeded to throw back drinks. My buddy hit if off with this one girl and before long I was talking to two others. Since our apartment was a few blocks away we and the three girls went back, picking up a bottle of cachaça on the way. I knew these chicks were up to something, but we were having fun and I figured they would fuck us and then when we were passed out they would sneak off with our wallets. So I hid mine under the mattress with my passport and travelers checks (this was the 90’s).
Sure enough the two that I picked up ended up drugging my friend, his chick and myself. The two of them got half naked and started making out on the couch and I jumped on top of them. All of a sudden I realized how fucked up I was and I looked at the other two and they were just laughing at us. I tried to get up to push them out the door but it was too late. I could not even stand.
I woke up in my underwear flat on my back with the worst hangover of my life. Luckily I had all my organs but they took 200 bucks and 2 grand in travelers checks. The worst part was trying to get those checks refunded. I spent the whole day puking around Rio going to various police stations and getting sent away as I needed a police report to get Amex to refund me. Finally a woman cop took pity on my miserable ass and wrote the report. I came back to the apartment after seven hours around Rio and my buddy was relaxing smoking a cigarette on the balcony after spending the day banging the chick we got drugged with.
Yeah, that’s the stuff!
Great story, KS! Love the final sentence.
Blackjack might have a challenger…
Cheers Slum!
These foreign bitches fleece you for a couple thousand bucks… the domestic bitches take your entire fuckin career. I’ll take these Brazil broads, they like to party.
I, uh… I watched a movie about incest in some Peruvian village, once, years ago. It was pretty weird.
Christ, that was 2005.
Heheh, I like the girl’s name in that flick, Madeinusa. The Brazilian lower class is famous for having crazy and fucked up names. I once met a guy there who said his given name was Michael Jackson dos Santos Almeida and that his brother was named Michael Jeckson dos Santos Almeida. I said “your parents gave you the same name?!” No, no, no, he said in Portuguese, I’m Jackson with an A, and he is Jeckson with an E.”
There’s a part in the movie when she reads the tag on his shirt (I think?) and it says Made in USA, and she’s confused about it, but it goes nowhere. I expect it’s just US beating bait, like, yeah, here’s a movie about some weird incest-loving villagers in the Andes, but you know who’s the real criminals? The US of A.
I don’t think it really comes off that way, they just murder the journalist who wants to rescue Madeinusa. So… maybe don’t fuck with bizarre Peruvians.
That’s the most Brazilian thing I’ve ever heard.
In my head, “Jeckson” just sounds like a South African saying “Jackson”.
Heheh, it is very Brazilian indeed. He wasn’t the only Michael Jackson I met there either. My buddy and I there used to bust out funny ass names that we had heard. One of my favorites became my screen name here. When name registration happened at the old place I just used one of my favorite names from Pernambuco. It sounds like Swellington in Portuguese but is spelled like what I use.
Or a German.
You could form a Brazilian soccer team with all the crazy names you’ve heard.
Kleiberson da Silva Guimarães
Nilson Queroz da Maracanã
Vinicius Passos da Queimada
Jurandir do Mato Leal
Ediwilson Humberto Magalhães
Igor Ferreres Falcão
Wendeson Jesus Alves
Yeah, I could easily get a team or two going of awesome Brazilian names.
Drank milk after the expiration date.
Plus, you’re Pickle
RickUrthona.Most of mine were only dangerous in retrospect. Walking alone at night in Paris. Accepting a night audit position at a seedy hotel. Crossing the street in Beijing. Two of these ended with a gun pointed at me, FWIW.
Gun was from:
– seedy hotel
– ???
Surely it wasn’t Paris, since French gun control laws ensure nobody would have a gun to point at you.
I’m writing an article. You guys, gals, whatever, are far too interesting.
It was Paris. That place doesn’t fuck around.
I’ve been assured that French “no-go zones” are w right-wing myth.
Well, it turns out that French no-go zones include any space not directly lit by a street light and can be steps away from the Eiffel Tower.
I certainly can’t come close to all of you with your vehicular adventures and/or close brushes with criminal gangs/law enforcement (redundant?) but I DID work as a substitute teacher for a while back when I had delusions of becoming a full-time teacher. (I got better.)
Early one wintry morning, I was awakened by a call asking if I could fill in for a little while at a residential school for kids with emotional & behavioral “issues.” The regular teacher lived one county over, and snow was piled in front of his garage door, preventing him from getting out until he shoveled it away.
I drove out to the school, out in the country just past the edge of town. Up on a snow-covered hill was a creepy old nineteenth century edifice straight out of a Dickens or Bronte novel. All I really remember about the few hours there was the moment when one of the boys (it was all boys in my small class, natch) hoisted one of those all-in-one chair-desks over his head and lunged toward another kid with it. I did what any hyper-responsible but stupid barely-trained professional would do – I grabbed the weaponized chair-desk and somehow prevented it from reaching its intended target (also miraculously preventing it from being diverted into my thick skull.) I was thrilled when the regular teacher arrived, and I excused myself with understandable (if undignified) haste.
I graciously declined future requests to sub at that fine institution. Being only about 5’4″-ish and small-framed – not to mention being an unabashedly-admitted chickenshit – I also declined offers to sub at the high school level even at “normal” schools. Any other recovering subs out there?
In retrospect, I have to wonder WTF substitute teachers were doing. Just ritual sacrifice to try and get a regular gig?
::point up to slummy’s question, points to own nose::
Didn’t work for me, thank goodness. Closest I came was working as an LD tutor at a rural middle school/high school. Oh, yeah – once at that school, I stepped in between two high schoolers who were obviously about to start fighting. I had naive faith that they wouldn’t slug a member of the faculty, even one on as low a rung as I was. It worked.
I have a wonderful guardian angel, but she probably got prematurely-gray hair and an ulcer from those incidents.
I enlisted into the US Marine Corps on a “Guaranteed Combat Arms” contract for four years, I asked for a six year contract but the recruiter talked me out of it. That was a big favor and probably should have been a red flag – Marine recruiters don’t usually advise restraint too often.
Just enlisting wasn’t necessarily a dangerous act in and of itself but the follow-on activities as they played out had some potential risk.
I used to be afraid of heights but years of jumping out of helicopters holding on to a slack rope kinda washed that reaction out of my personal inventory.
Out of the many different things I did in uniform with a high potential for injury was, during a field exercise in which my platoon was the aggressor moving in to attack Echo company set in on a hill, and our Gunney lead us on a direction that he said they wouldn’t expect to see us coming from.
We worked our way slowly across a flat, overgrown field for about 45 minutes before climbing up the back of the hill which we found Echo dug in to. I was thinking they wouldn’t have expected us because the back of the hill was so steep and overgrown that it was going to take an hour or so to get through it. About halfway up I realized the real reason why they had no idea we would come from that direction – it was the beaten zone on an active gunnery range and a few volleys of high explosive mortar rounds started erupting from the field we had just crossed.
a few volleys of high explosive mortar rounds started erupting from the field we had just crossed.
JFC. Was Gunney ignorant or insane?
I always figured – in the time since then – that he knew either the forward observer or the Gunney from the unit that was shooting and had them hold fire while we crossed the field. He was pretty freaking crazy – even for a three- tour Vietnam Vet – but I doubt he would have risked all our lives like that.
Going to Belfast in the late ’80s, when I was 18.
Truly despicable person we have as governor of Michigan.
https://www.foxnews.com/politics/michigan-gretchen-whitmer-florida-travel-lie-in-town-whole-time
For some reason freep and mlive didn’t bother to mention this. Journalism.
My dad was a copy editor for the Baltimore Sun for 35 years and he despised most of his co workers. It took me a long long time to understand why.
You’re H. L. Mencken’s long-lost son!
Shame, embarrassment, setting a personal example are dead. The only (sort of) regret is getting caught.
The important part, nobody seems to get, is that these people have access to all of the best information. If they disregard it, it’s because they are not afraid of the ‘vid at all. She literally talks to world renowned experts. there’s no piece of information she doesn’t have. And she’s totally unafraid.
Her undergrad degree was Communications from a third rate state school. She’s as smart as a football player on scholarship
She’s just one of maybe a half dozen who’ve done the same thing. These are the people telling us to be very afraid and then proving that they not even a little bit afraid. We had a county supervisor who voted to ban restaurant dining and said it was the most dangerous thing a person could do. Then she got in her car and drove straight to her favorite restaurant and ate. She got caught. They know it’s all bullshit and they act accordingly.
That was exactly the lesson of Newsom’s little dinner at the French Laundry with the head of the Cal Medical Association. It wasn’t just the hypocrisy that was blatant, it was that they knew the rules they were making were bullshit. No way that douchebag is putting his own life in danger, he had no fear of doing so.
If this: https://pjmedia.com/news-and-politics/victoria-taft/2021/04/24/report-border-czar-kamala-harriss-book-is-purchased-with-us-tax-dollars-and-given-as-welcome-gift-to-illegal-aliens-n1442572 is her book cover or some of the illustrations, then the Dr. Suess Estate needs to rethink their groveling.
LOL!
She is some piece of work.
You know who else had charisma and could really organize a community ?
And wrote a book?
Elvis Costello wrote a book a day.
Shirley you want to buzz them with an appropriately loaded out F-15E?
F-15s fly over here sometimes because ‘merica needs to station them in the UK for some reason. One crashed in the North Sea back in June. RIP.
whaddup doh’
whats goody fam ?
Even though I didnt just wake up, I am on my 2nd (TALL) beer.
Obligatory.
Good mornin’, homey.
I was gratified by Spud’s shout-out re: his musical selection for the week. It’s a rare treat for someone to appreciate my admittedly quirky musical tastes, so I need to do something about that.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=SSbBvKaM6sk
?
Blur’s Love Shack. ?
?
So THAT’S the “Woo hoo!” they play at the minor league ballpark every time someone on the home team hits a homer.
OK, I’ve learned something, so I don’t have to learn anything else the rest of the day.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YHnhbEzJAS8
She’s doing it wrong.
Today, in nature…
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=07zapzcuR84
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=b6EDLIPDYbI
One more. ?
https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/crime/anti-lockdown-protests-london-arrests-police-b1836982.html
Only 8?
Paywalled (technically, “registerwalled,”) but I gather them Brits are once again putting us formerly-freedom-loving Yanks to shame.
Eight police officers were injured after violence broke out at an anti-lockdown protest in central London attended by thousands of people.
Bottles were thrown as the Metropolitan Police attempted to disperse crowds in Hyde Park at the end of the demonstration on Saturday evening.
The force said two of the injured officers were taken to hospital but were not believed to be seriously injured. Photos posted on social media showed a female police officer bleeding from a cut to her head and a male police officer with a cut to his forehead.
Five people were arrested for offences including assault on police.
It came after an estimated 10,000 joined the “Unite for Freedom” march through the capital to oppose measures in place to curb the spread of Covid-19.
Protesters – mostly not wearing face coverings – carried signs and marched through London chanting “freedom” and “take off your mask”.
Images from Hyde Park showed protesters holding placards reading “you don’t need proof to know the truth”, “no to vaccine passports” and “the people refuse your totalitarian state agenda”.
(Relevant part of the article)
Thanks!
Up next: calls for “common sense bottle control.”