IFLA: The “Head on a Swivel” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of November 9

by | Nov 9, 2025 | IFLA | 44 comments

Eep! Bad week! It starts of getting a little better than last week (but still Not Good) as the “love life goes to shit” arrangement loses some of its components. Then on the 11th* our old nemesis MERCURY RETROGRADE shows up again. But that’s not even the worst part of the week. Friday and Saturday has a whole pile or celestial wrong going on with domestic troubles (the moon and Saturn retrograde) more love problems — or possibly the murder of a woman — and the general everything goes to fuck/end of happiness involving the Sun, the Earth, the Moon, Venus, MERCURY RETROGRADE and Jupiter retrograde. I went back to check to ensure Mars isn’t involved, but for those of you who weren’t keeping track, literally every other planet is involved in Bad Signs. There is literally only one good sign and that ends on the 11th, but before that should be a great time for Practical Shooting. Go me!

*Anybody else hate Armistice Day as much as I do? Instead of you know, just ending a war, lets end it on a future day so that we can have a nice aesthetically pleasing date and time. Who cares about people getting slaughtered between now and then?

Scorpio: Page of Wands – This card represents the qualities of an obedient child. How that applies to you I don’t know. Who are you?

Sagittarius: Ace of Wands reversed – This is the spear version of the Queen of Swords — uniquely male problems.

Capricorn: 5 of Cups – Yes, bad thing happened. However, you’re making it out to be worse than it is or ignoring the silver lining.

Aquarius: 3 of Cups – We’ve covered this one before — it’s about parties/celebrations especially regarding women and also about harvest festivals. Note the pumpkins, which also is a sign that Pam is drawing post-Columbian exchange.

Pisces: 8 of Cups – in contrast to the 5 of Cups, bad thing has NOT happened. It’s just you valuing something more than your current successes.

Aries: 9 of Swords – Getting way too stressed-out over astrology.

Taurus: 10 of swords reversed – Sometimes you get lifted up so that those uplifiting you can toss you over the guard rails.

Gemini: 3 of Swords reversed – a generally very shitty event. But then it’s over, with little/no lingering consequences.

Cancer: Queen of Swords reversed – The qualities of a stereotypical awful woman:  Malice, bigotry, artifice, prudery, bale, deceit.

Leo: Ace of Swords reversed – Sometimes the solution is “hit it harder.” This is not one of those times.

Virgo: The Moon reversed – Having absolutely no idea what is going on.

Libra: The Fool reversed – The upright is about the active aspects of tomfoolery, this being reversed is about the passive — the things that get neglected — Negligence, absence, distribution, carelessness, apathy, nullity, vanity.

About The Author

Not Adahn

Not Adahn

Despite all my rage, I am still just an impeccably dressed rat.

44 Comments

  1. Threedoor

    Having absolutely no idea what is going on.

    This is true.

    • Tres Cool

      The stars know me so well.

  2. Gender Traitor

    Scorpio: Page of Wands – This card represents the qualities of an obedient child

    Well, I WAS one…for all the good it did me. 😒

    • Suthenboy

      Same here.

    • Threedoor

      Only got me hesitancy, an aversion to risk, and an attraction to women who were bad for me.

  3. DEG

    Sometimes the solution is “hit it harder.” This is not one of those times.

    Sufficiently shitty splatters?

  4. The Late P Brooks

    Sagittarius: Ace of Wands reversed – This is the spear version of the Queen of Swords — uniquely male problems.

    My imaginary girlfriend suddenly decides my imaginary gigantic cock just doesn’t fit in her plans anymore?

  5. ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

    Whatever happens this week, it cannot be worse than Peter Gabriel.

    Or more pretentious.

    • Threedoor

      Blows the dust off of US

    • CatchTheCarp

      I picked up his So album at a Goodwill store for 50 cents, it was like new and is one of the better sounding records in my meager vinyl collection. It’s actually a decent record and one I would not have bought if not for the low price. I gave up hunting for records at Goodwill – not worth the effort. I’d occasionally find something interesting only to find it was just an empty album cover.

      • Threedoor

        So is not my favorite of his, similar story but with the CD.

  6. Ted S.

    Gemini: 3 of Swords reversed – a generally very shitty event. But then it’s over, with little/no lingering consequences.

    I don’t eat at Taco Bell.

  7. Sean

    “Cancer: Queen of Swords reversed – The qualities of a stereotypical awful woman: Malice, bigotry, artifice, prudery, bale, deceit.”

    Prudery? I think not.

    🏓. I don’t even like ping pong.

  8. R.J.

    Leo: Ace of Swords reversed – Sometimes the solution is “hit it harder.” This is not one of those times.

    Oddly prescient. I am spending the day revising my resume and preparing to job hunt. I expect a layoff, or an unpleasant re-org at the very least.

  9. juris imprudent

    Friday and Saturday has a whole pile or celestial wrong going on

    So I should rethink the Shibari workshop I’m going to?

    Getting way too stressed-out over astrology.

    Oh. Never mind.

  10. Mojeaux

    Why do you hate Taurus so much?

    • (((Jarflax

      Isn’t everyone kind of tired of all the bull?

    • Derpetologist

      Their revolvers are OK.

    • Derpetologist

      toro, taurus, centaur, minotaur, Alpha Centauri…that’s all I got off the top of my head.

      • Tres Cool

        Someone getting milked ?

      • Threedoor

        I hope so later today Tres.

  11. Grummun

    Who cares about people getting slaughtered between now and then?

    No shit. I’ve seen copies of newspapers from the time, approving articles about “parting shots,” commanders continuing artillery fire until the last minute. Bunch of assholes.

    • Threedoor

      I hope Woodrow Wilson’s stay in Hell is appropriate.

      • Threedoor

        I liven in TN/KY for almost six years and never heard that phrase.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      Tenne-believin’?

    • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

      One of the greatest poets of all time died just before 11am 11/11

      Bent double, like old beggars under sacks,
      Knock-kneed, coughing like hags, we cursed through sludge,
      Till on the haunting flares we turned our backs,
      And towards our distant rest began to trudge.
      Men marched asleep. Many had lost their boots,
      But limped on, blood-shod. All went lame; all blind;
      Drunk with fatigue; deaf even to the hoots
      Of gas-shells dropping softly behind.

      Gas! GAS! Quick, boys!—An ecstasy of fumbling
      Fitting the clumsy helmets just in time,
      But someone still was yelling out and stumbling
      And flound’ring like a man in fire or lime.—
      Dim through the misty panes and thick green light,
      As under a green sea, I saw him drowning.

      In all my dreams before my helpless sight,
      He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning.

      If in some smothering dreams, you too could pace
      Behind the wagon that we flung him in,
      And watch the white eyes writhing in his face,
      His hanging face, like a devil’s sick of sin;
      If you could hear, at every jolt, the blood
      Come gargling from the froth-corrupted lungs,
      Obscene as cancer, bitter as the cud
      Of vile, incurable sores on innocent tongues,—
      My friend, you would not tell with such high zest
      To children ardent for some desperate glory,
      The old Lie: Dulce et decorum est
      Pro patria mori.

      -Dulce et Decorum Est

      By Wilfred Owen

  12. The Late P Brooks

    Economic destruction

    The city is being hit “especially hard,” said Radha Muthiah, the group’s CEO and president, “because of the sequence of events that has occurred over the course of this year.”

    The nation’s capital has been battered by a series of decisions by the Trump administration, from the layoffs of federal workers to the ongoing law enforcement intervention into the district. The added blow of the shutdown, which has furloughed workers and paused money for food assistance, is only deepening the economic toll.

    The latest figures from the D.C. Office of Revenue Analysis do not account for workforce changes since the shutdown that began Oct. 1. But even the September jobs report shows that the seasonally adjusted unemployment rate hovers at 6%, compared with the most recent national rate of 4.3%, and has been the highest in the nation for months.

    Boo fucking hoo.

  13. DEG

    OT: Aussie shenanigans around ancient human remains

    In March 2025, the Australian government quietly buried its last collection of Pleistocene human fossils in an unmarked grave. These remains were of Homo sapiens who had shared the Earth with Neanderthals. But they went into the ground with little media coverage or protest from the global scientific community, who knew better than anyone that these delicate, carefully reconstructed fossils would not last long in hostile conditions.

    The significance of this loss is hard to overstate. Australia is a unique piece in the puzzle of human origins. It was colonized by modern humans before Europe, but it remained almost entirely isolated, preserving many aspects of human culture and genetics that vanished elsewhere. As Charles Darwin observed, “the Australian aborigines rank amongst the most distinct of all the races of man.”

      • DEG

        Kennewick Man gets a mention in the article.

      • slumbrew

        The Red Paint People of Maine, too. Maybe that theory was wrong but the modern Maine tribes ensured it was never put to the test and almost certainly destroyed the remains.

      • Gustave Lytton

        No different than the taliban.

      • Threedoor

        They are luddites at every level.

  14. The Late P Brooks

    Thea Price was fired from her job at the U.S. Institute of Peace in March of this year, part of the wave of layoffs meant to shrink the size of the federal government. Her husband, a government contractor, also lost his job at a museum. Since then, they have lived on savings, Medicaid and SNAP.

    Price, 37, recently went to a food pantry in Arlington, Virginia, for the first time recently. The shutdown halted funding for SNAP, after it took her months to get it, and the $500 payments she receives each month were set to stop. Virginia sent a partial payment but it was not enough, Price said. With her options to sustain herself and her family running out, Price is moving back to her hometown in the Seattle area.

    “We can’t afford to stay in the area any longer and hope that something might pan out,” she said. “We’re just in a much different place than when these things started in March.”

    At least she has valuable work experience and marketable skills.

    • Suthenboy

      As I understand the US Institute of Peace is one of the CIA’s most prolific regime change/war monger arms. Their job is to capture markets for US companies. Peace my ass.
      Were all of her cohorts fired as well?

    • Threedoor

      Looting is all they know.

  15. Derpetologist

    “Armistice Day has become Veterans’ Day. Armistice Day was sacred. Veterans’ Day is not.
    So I will throw Veterans’ Day over my shoulder. Armistice Day I will keep. I don’t want to throw away any sacred things.
    What else is sacred? Oh, Romeo and Juliet, for instance.
    And all music is.”
    ― Kurt Vonnegut, Breakfast of Champions

    • Evan from Evansville

      The lady who sorted me out before my MRI had “So it goes” on forearm. One of the few times I’ve complimented a person on their ink.

  16. Evan from Evansville

    Taurus: 10 of swords reversed – Sometimes you get lifted up so that those uplifiting you can toss you over the guard rails.

    See, I feel pretty good about this. That was *last* week, what with too-good -to-be true gig. I’m rather glad my own cyber senses flickered enough to be suspicious. Thanks to all here for help poking my eyes in the right direction.

    So, ya see, Xr. Cosmic Ballet, we’re past that and don’t need a sequel. (Those never happen.)

  17. hayeksplosives

    I went to the Flying Heritage and Combat Armor Museum in Everett Washington yesterday. It’s been a year or so since I was there last.

    A generous unnamed donor has recently enabled free admission so dropping in to see the newly arrived P-38 Lockheed plane was a no-brainer.

    I’ve never seen so many people at that museum! Lots of kids and teens. Warms the heart.

    • Threedoor

      The P38 is the sexiest of WWII combat aircraft.