IFLA: The “Lacking Inspiration” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of January 11

by | Jan 11, 2026 | IFLA | 34 comments

I have been in a bit of a mental fog since the holidays. Not sure why. But I am currently bereft of any kind of creativity; hopefully something will inspire me to put up some music to embed and make this more visually appealing.

Fortunately, you don’t need to be creative to be an Astrologer! You just look at the stars and they tell you what to write down! And this week the stars say… not much going on until the weekend, when things take a turn for the worse. Friday we get the moon/Jupiter retrograde nonsense, but things get really bad when Mercury and Mars come into alignment on Saturday. That’s right about the time Capricorn loses its Venus buff, but my online calculator is broken and it tells me that won’t be happening until Dec 31, 1969. I’m sure some of you know exactly what’s wrong here, but that’s not my field.

Capricorn: 10 of Cups – Planning paid off.

Aquarius: Ace of Wands – General good luck for dudes. Otherwise, it’s about beginning, setting things in motion, etc.

Pisces: The Star reversed – Searching closely for information will let you find some that isn’t actually there. Detection limits are a thing that will bite you if you let them.

Aries: Page of Coins – People you expect to do their jobs, will do their jobs.

Taurus: The Emperor – Stability, power, protection, realization; a great person; aid, reason, conviction; also authority and will.

Gemini: Two of Cups – Promises, vows, formalized agreements, also important informal agreements such as friendship/love etc.

Cancer: 4 of Swords reversed – Wise administration, circumspection, economy, avarice, precaution, testament.

Leo: 8 of Wands reversed – Jealousy, internal conflict, quarrels.

Virgo: Queen of Wands –  A dark woman, rural woman, friendly, love of money, success in business, lesbians, and oddly enough both spinster and slut.

Libra: 4 of Cups reversed – Not falling for bullshit, novelty, being left alone.

Scorpio: Queen of Cups – All the classic stereotypes of womanly virtue and skill.

Sagittarius: The Empress reversed – Light, truth, the unravelling of involved matters, public rejoicings, vacillation.

About The Author

Not Adahn

Not Adahn

Despite all my rage, I am still just an impeccably dressed rat.

34 Comments

  1. Sean

    “ Cancer: 4 of Swords reversed – Wise administration, circumspection, economy, avarice, precaution, testament.”

    Wise? Like making sure I have a towel by the bed?

  2. Gender Traitor

    Scorpio: Queen of Cups – All the classic stereotypes of womanly virtue and skill.

    I hope that means I’m going to finish everything I have to get done at work this week. 😟

  3. DEG

    Fortunately, you don’t need to be creative to be an Astrologer! You just look at the stars and they tell you what to write down!

    That’s bait.

    Jealousy, internal conflict, quarrels.

    It’s a shitty shit sandwich.

  4. Mojeaux

    Taurus: The Emperor – Stability, power, protection, realization; a great person; aid, reason, conviction; also authority and will.

    Oh, a second good one in a row!

  5. The Late P Brooks

    Sagittarius: The Empress reversed – Light, truth, the unravelling of involved matters, public rejoicings, vacillation.

    I can’t decide if this is good or bad.

  6. Threedoor

    Virgo.
    Got me sweating over here.
    I hope my wife doesn’t find out.

    • Ted S.

      It reads to me like your bordello is going to have record revenue this week.

      • Threedoor

        Or that dark mistress is going to drain my bank account.

  7. EvilSheldon

    While decluttering my living room, I just found a couple of old Holosun 507C X2 mini red dots. Yay!

    • slumbrew

      Normal people just find change in the couch.

      • EvilSheldon

        I do hope I’m not coming across as a normal person…

      • slumbrew

        You have nothing to fear.

  8. juris imprudent

    Planning paid off. — The missus does love to plan.

    People you expect to do their jobs, will do their jobs. — Does that mean I don’t do mine?

    • Threedoor

      Best option for a group project.

  9. The Late P Brooks

    All the classic stereotypes of womanly virtue and skill.

    Cleaning up men’s messes?

    • Chipping Pioneer

      Making sammiches.

  10. EvilSheldon

    Huh. Apparently there’s a football game today.

  11. The Late P Brooks

    Ballsy

    Then, in April 2020, with schools closed and safety net programs ramping up, Feeding Our Future sent a draft lawsuit to the Minnesota Department of Education, threatening to sue if the state did not approve its applications for meal programs. The state complied, according to the legislative auditor. A similar pattern continued for more than a year.

    In November 2020, Feeding Our Future sued the Minnesota Department of Education, alleging that the state was slow-walking its grant applications.

    The lawsuit put state officials on the defensive, according to the Office of the Legislative Auditor, and deterred them from taking action against the nonprofit.

    Cruel racists, starving helpless little children. For shame.

    • Chafed

      White guilt is very expensive.

  12. Evan from Evansville

    Taurus: The Emperor – Stability, power, protection, realization; a great person; aid, reason, conviction; also authority and will.
    —-
    Well, I’m protected now by my stable gig and living rent-free, and good news came this week. My voca rehab dude finally showed something useful, and we’re working on getting me an in-person interview with a nearby financial firm that wants in with folk like me.

    Minnesota Munch also got back in touch. She’s going through the same struggles back Stateside, but her adoptive family and home life are dreadful. We’d both love to be roommates, teammates, during our journeys back here. That’d be nice. We’ve never even hugged, but when/if we meet up, I kinda can’t not see us not taking it a stage further. (Would. (She holds the cards.)) That’d be a fun glimpse into sanity, to once again have a peer around.

  13. UnCivilServant

    I’m getting accustomed to the irons on my 686. The problem is where on the 1911 there are three dots that you just line up and the center dot is on the target, the 686 has one dot, And you line up the top of the rear sights with the middle of the dot. Intuitively I wanted to line up the top of the rear sights with the top of the front sights and thus missed low.

    • EvilSheldon

      When I’m shooting a pistol, all my visual focus is on the spot on the target I want to hit – a spot about the size of a quarter. I kinda let the sights (or the dot, usually) do what they’re gonna do, and correct as necessary.

    • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

      My dad had the .45acp version of that revolver. Even in stainless I liked it.

      But, you line up the front sight blade in the rear notch, no dots needed, as it should be.

    • (((Jarflax

      Go for a head shot; they’re going to be wearing bulletproof vests

      • Threedoor

        Head and groin.

    • Tres Cool

      He looks like the construction worker from the Village People

      • Sean

        Thank you

  14. Chafed

    Congratulations Buffalo! Have another drink Rhywun.

Submit a Comment