Something my kids found a taste for in the past year or so…Dubai chocolate.
This is my review of Evil Twin Brewing Imperial Biscotti Break:
So what is Dubai Chocolate? Why am I supposed to believe this somehow was made in Dubai? In all seriousness I don’t think they make anything there besides gas. They did in fact, invent it there…from a number of ingredients that in no way can reasonably be sourced locally. Which brings me to the local supermarket. You see, nowhere in the US can they produce cocoa beans. Its all imported from a place that can grow cocoa, now with a tariff! This is the same for some land of chocolate place like…I dunno Switzerland who imports it as well, likely with their own import duty. Along with the other ingredients like pistachios, also produced in warmer climates. Then the entire finished product is shipped to the US which has its own import duty to bake in. At some point you end up with a $60 chocolate bar—WTF that can’t be right? Okay thats for a two pack.
Here’s a more reasonable place to find it…
So what are we to do? Pay insane prices for decadence? Producing it locally when competing with such ridiculous pricing means we can try manmade horrors beyond comprehension:
California Cultured sources its product from samples taken by cocoa plants identified as having ideal flavors and aroma. Once identified and scraped, the cells are then grown in nutrient tanks until there’s enough growth to make some real chocolate — a process taking “days instead of months,” as the company’s websiteputs it.
“We’re directly growing the tissue that gets turned into chocolate,” CEO Alan Perlstein told CNBC in a 2024 interview about the process. Though the output is said to be relatively quick once everything is up and running, getting there is arduous work. According to CNBC‘s reporting, it takes a minimum of six months, and anywhere up to three years to get an industrial production line humming.
The partnership is one of dozens of industry projects seeking a lab-grown alternative to farmed cocoa. Though the two companies may be the closest to offering a lab-grown consumer product, it nonetheless faces three structural barriers: regulation, consumer acceptance, and cost.
Okay, I will consider paying the goddamn tariffs.
No import duties were paid when I purchased this beer. Although I did pay an excise tax on alcohol levied locally. I don’t much care for that either. While this is fairly sweet its more of the biscuit type sweetness rather than candy. Dark chocolate and mild coffee notes balance out the booze, so this is one to avoid the white girl beer alert. Evil Twin Brewing Imperial Biscotti Break: 3.8/5
At some point you end up with a $60 chocolate bar
Egad.
And disgustingly, it’s milk chocolate? Hard pass.
“TikTok craze”. OK then. 🙄
Worse.
The linked article about mentioned an “ASMR” video.
I hate those. I’m half deaf and can’t stand the way they sound. Like a video game with the sound controls all out of balance.
I’ll have to look for it.
I liked the Rogue Chocolate Stout so I bet I’ll like this.
Been a while since I saw that one.
The partnership is one of dozens of industry projects seeking a lab-grown alternative to farmed cocoa. Though the two companies may be the closest to offering a lab-grown consumer product, it nonetheless faces three structural barriers: regulation, consumer acceptance, and cost.
Where is the “blood chocolate” boycott NGO? Will they engage in hand to hand combat with the “no GMO frankenfoods” NGO?
I’d tune in.
I don’t get the knee jerk resistance to lab grown foods. I have no idea how they taste. Assuming they are good, why not eat them?
For my part, it’s similar to e.g. plant based “meat” products. Just a pile of toxic crap derived from chemical processes that resemble petroleum distillation, crammed together using other industrial processes.
Now I know lab grown X is a different beast, but I see no reason to experiment – too many unknown unknowns – especially when the natural thing is readily available, with a long history of modification whose value and lack of harm has been established over human biological and cultural evolutionary time scales. So no, I don’t disdain it at the level of industrial garbage passed off as ‘meat’ (or anything in a package with a list of ingredients that reads like a chemistry textbook and will last 20 years in your pantry), but I also see no reason to indulge; you may think you know what you’re doing mimicing complex systems, but you really don’t. So the burden of proof is on you (the royal generic you) to demonstrate its value, not on me to justify why I’m going to stay away from it; taste is not the relevant diagnostic to me.
why not eat them?
Because I’m tired of everything being fake?
NO OIL FOR CHOCHOLATE!!!
Anything that takes habitat away from wild animals and plants is soaked in blooooood (or sap in the case of plants).
Better we all die off than continue harm critters that only want to live.
(Takes a hard look at the dwarf bamboo taking over the yard and says to myself, not you.)
IT’S HAPPENING!
I just.came from the credit union, and they reprogrammed their machines.
I no longer have to press 1 for English.
😁🇺🇸
After inserting the card into the ATM the first screen that comes up says, “Loading preferences.” The second screen says, “English or Spanish?”. WTF? Isn’t language one of the loaded preferences?
I’m still burning down the last withdrawal of a couple hundred dollars I made at the ATM… a couple years ago?
Cue lawsuit from disgruntled vibrant guest in 3, 2, 1, ….
I no longer have to press 1 for English.
It doesn’t count if you pressed 2 for English.
Ackshually…
I believe cacao trees are growing in Hawaii
I wonder if they would survive in Puerto Rico?
Yes.
https://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/2017/03/01/516913761/reviving-puerto-ricos-cocoa-farms-centuries-after-hurricanes-destroyed-them
Jones Act.
I believe cacao trees are growing in Hawaii
I thought they banned commercial agriculture in Hawaii.
“…from samples taken by cocoa plants identified as having ideal flavors and aroma.”
What if they identify as “cocoa with penises?” Good for flavor? We need to ask some experts…
Apparently Brian Doherty passed away last night – 57.
That’s unfortunate and unexpected.
Okay, people. I think I’ve been a denizen here long enough to plug my “new”-ish release. At the moment you can only buy it in ebook from me or Kindle, but that will change.
The Proviso (3rd Edition). OMWC liked the 2nd edition, but I can’t find his review because it’s in the archives and I don’t know where the links to the archives went. However, he called this out:
which is still there.
Anyhoo, apparently, the reviews on 1st and 2nd edition haven’t populated Amazon for the 3rd edition yet. Maybe they won’t. I don’t know.
For those who’ve been following along, the three main characters are the grandchildren of Trey and Marina (1520 Main) and the several-greats grandchildren of Celia and Elliott. I used to call this genre romance, but it’s really a soap opera, but that’s not a category and also, a young man asked me what I wrote and I said, “soap operas,” and he asked me what that was. 😳
This is the book of my heart, the first one I published, and people loved it, but it’s the weakest of everything I’ve published (or at least, the 1st edition was). I keep trying to bring it up to snuff with the rest of them, hence, 3rd edition.
Nice! I shall look for it. Look like I am getting a stack of books next paycheck.
I hope it sells well.
It ain’t over till the Dove Bar sings.
T-Minus 6 days at the gas station. Off now for my 3rd to last Saturday, followed by next week’s normal 4 days, then a gift Sat the 28th to help keep bridges tied together. It’s only a 6-8/wk contract, and likely closer to the former estimate. Good strategery, Ev. (No snark.)
Bruins v Capitals is on ABC soon-ish, so y’all should get on it. Or do your Normal People things, which that might also include.
And so, continuing with my aging-related wall-hitting moment with the aforementioned young man who asked me what a “soap opera” was, I kind of dunked on myself by accident with my immortal sorcerer story.
I’m writing this to occur in a vague near future like 2040 or something. My heroine is 32 years old, to which I do not relate, but she’s a librarian so I can get away with writing her older/more mature than 32. My 413yo sorcerer is forever 38, a fact which his unusually spry 84yo daughter (his youngest) started to resent when she was presented with the fact that he’s got his eye on a 32-year-old, and is the first woman since her mother (who died in 1960) to catch his eye. Her mother kind of put him off relationships.
So, my 32-year-old librarian has a boss who’s about 72.
Now, mind you, I’m just typing in ages willy nilly with absolutely NO thought as to what that means in terms of the year of our Lord 2040. My librarian’s apartment is full of antiques and tchotchkes, but when she brings her boss to her apartment, she says, “Don’t touch the Bakelite or Shiny Brite,” the boss says, “What’s that?” and then it hit me.
THIS 72YO BOSS IS MY AGE. 🤯😤
I’m 48 and know what Bakelite is.
But I’m a car guy and have old stuff.
Yeah, obviously I do too but I can’t assume other people my age will know that that is for whatever reason. I had to look up what those old-timey glass Christmas ornaments were called because I couldn’t remember.
Musicians know what it is too. Knobs on guitars from the 20s through the 40s used it.
Speaking of AI slop:
The other day I clicked on a youtube video about the new MotoGP engine formula. I knew it was AI slop, but sometimes they contain actual information, pilfered from who knows where. This one, however, claimed to be a real person who does all his own research and loves motorcycle racing. It wasn’t all that convincing, but later “he” did that AI slop numbers thing where 2027 was “two zero two seven” and shortly thereafter egregiously mispronounced Aleix Espargaro’s (Honda test rider’s) name. It all came with the typical stilted cadence and weird emphasis on the wrong syllables.
You’re not fooling anyone, “Eric”.
I believe cacao trees are growing in Hawaii
Many of the cacao plantations in Hawaii burned.
Re: Dubai chocolate: inclusions are for suckers.
Coincidentally on topic, today is the chocolating. The fat elf brought my wife a melanger last Christmas. Ever since, we’ve been hemming and hawing on how to do roasting, cracking and winnowing without significant additional capital investment. But the wife found an expedient shortcut: Chocolate Alchemy sells kits of roasted nibs, organic sugar and cocoa butter. Just plop it in your melanger* and voila, 24 hours later, chocolate. It will still need tempered and molded.
The problem we have is Santa brought a bigly machine, 10lb capacity, because he wanted a model that tips to pour out the finished chocolate. But the machine has a minimum quantity, 40% of capacity, that it can process. So we’ve got 4lb of chocolate refining. Once it’s done, we can temper and mold in smaller quantities, but that is a crap load of chocolate to go through.
Side note, for reasons I don’t understand, it seems like all consumer-grade melangers are made in India. The Diamond Custom machine we have is actually a Premier branded machine, made in India, imported to the US and “upgraded” by Diamond Custom. But I’ve searched for other melangers, and all made in India. At the Northwest Chocolate Festival and Midwest Chocolate Festival, the people repping the melangers were Indians. ::shrug:: just curious, is all.
*where “plop” actually means “warm to ~120F in the oven then feed gradually so you don’t seize up your machine.”
“ Once it’s done, we can temper and mold in smaller quantities, but that is a crap load of chocolate to go through.”
My 14 year old daughter would try to demolish it.
Full 10 pound batches = Glib bars.
Why am I not surprised someone here is a chocolatier?
the dubai chocolate thing was a trend year last year but it has faded.
the beer sounds horrible.
the beer sounds horrible.
Is it even beer?
Pistachio butter is fantastic, then they ruin it with sugar.
Opening the floodgates
The State Department has slashed by about 80% the fee for Americans to formally renounce their U.S. citizenship.
After years of legal battles with several groups representing Americans wanting to give up their citizenship, the department on Friday published a final rule in the Federal Register that reduces the cost from $2,350 to $450.
——-
The fee was raised from $450 to $2,350 in 2015 to cover the administrative expenses as the number of people wanting to renounce their citizenship surged in part due to new U.S. tax reporting requirements for American expatriates that angered many.
At last people can escape the viciousness and cruelty of Trump’s America.
Reduce the fee to zero. Set up an AI to just process the formal request and then delete the applicant’s citizenship records. GTFO.
But those effected are still allowed to pay taxes, right?
I dunno, lab-grown chocolate doesn’t squick me out in nearly the same way that lab-grown meat does.
I would try it.
I’ve eaten Beyond burgers, cricket chips, and freaking last week I ate at freaking McDonalds for content.
Yeah I’ll try frankenchocolate.
Tell me if this passes the smell test? Polls are usually off, but this seems unusually bogus.
According to an article in today’s paper, WalletHub reports “(Penna.) Residents were found to spend about 1.98% of their average monthly household income on groceries.” The annual median household income in Penna. is about $80,000, so the math would seem to indicate that the average household spends only about $31 per week on groceries. I’m triple that, for two people, and we don’t buy extravagant grocery stuff. Is WalletHub trying to minimize the amount Americans pay on groceries (to sooth anger with OMB maybe?) or do they have another agenda or just full of shit?
Add the forgotten zero on the end. Zeros ain’t nuthin’ but they still count.
Uh. Single dude and I pay way, way more than for just my groceries. I don’t buy much but I don’t cook here. (Not ‘my’ kitchen. Icky.) Many $6 baked dinners.
Absolute horse shit. (My habits and the ‘study.’)
“full of shit”
My gin budget is higher.
https://x.com/the_engi_nerd/status/2032837627859136577
the math would seem to indicate that the average household spends only about $31 per week on groceries
I can’t get out of the grocery store for less than fifty bucks anymore, and it’s just me.
Try again.
My wife and I usually drop $30-50 twice a week at a low-end grocery store, and we don’t buy anything fancy.
For a family of five I spend $150-200 a week.
Learn to drive trucks
The International Brotherhood of Teamsters has urged the Justice Department to block Paramount Skydance‘s $111 billion deal to acquire Warner Bros. Discovery unless Paramount agrees to “substantial and enforceable safeguards” against job cuts and supporting increased U.S. production.
The union said it told the DOJ this week that the proposed merger between Paramount Skydance and Warner Bros. Discovery poses a “direct threat to film and television workers nationwide,” including nearly 15,000 Motion Picture Teamsters. The union said it submitted a detailed report this week to the DOJ’s Antitrust Division outlining its concerns.
More creative destruction, plz.
1990 Mercedes Benz 420SE, German police car featuring B5-level armor protection and MP5 submachine gun holders moulded into the door panels
https://x.com/CigsMake/status/2032487348705898760
I’d drive that for a dollar!
So, my torque wrench has a 3/8ths inch connector.
The torque plate that came with the barrel nut for the lego rifle is 1/2.
I’ve ordered adapters, but I really wanted to just have this thing done today.
That happened to me too. I wish I had gotten a full adapter set when I got the torque wrench.
The Jacket posted that Doherty died in a hiking accident.
I’ve ordered adapters, but I really wanted to just have this thing done today.
Harbor Freight, Lowe’s, Ace…
Lowe’s carries Craftsman and they sell individual pieces. At Harbor Freight you almost always have to buy a set to get the one you need.
Game over, man
BYD just destroyed any remaining argument against electric vehicle adoption. At a March 5 launch event in Shenzhen, China, it announced the Blade Battery 2.0, a new battery that can drive more than 621 miles on a single charge. In the process, the company has exposed just how far behind the rest of the EV industry has fallen.
Gasoline-powered cars have held onto two supreme advantages for a century: the five-minute pit stop and the typical 400-mile range that enabled people to take long road trips without worry. Meanwhile, EVs have suffered from long charging times and short ranges that induced range anxiety in potential buyers, who mostly preferred to stay with internal-combustion-engine (ICE) cars or hybrids. With the release of its new Blade Battery 2.0 and Megawatt Flash Charge 2.0 architectures, the fear is over.
According to the official figures announced at the event, high-volume production BYD cars like its new Denza Z9GT now can drive over 621 miles on a single charge, add roughly 250 miles of range in the time it takes to order a coffee, and rely on a battery pack that refuses to die before the car does, with a guaranteed 620,000-mile lifetime unheard of in any EV.
If they say so it must be true. After all, nobody has ever made claims about EVs which were subsequently debunked.
BYD’s new charging architecture kills the ICE pit stop advantage entirely by pushing 1,500 kilowatts of peak power through a single cable, or up to 2,100 kilowatts if using a dual-gun setup. To understand the sheer power of that electrical flow, you have to look at the current industry standard.
What could possibly go wrong?
Pi Day trivia:
On March 14, 1592 a conclave of knights became embroiled in a huge schism in part due to the antics of a novice tattooist.
It was the first time that a Sir conference was divided by a dye amateur.