Wednesday Afternoon SugarLinks – No New Tale To Tell

by | May 31, 2023 | Daily Links | 122 comments

 

I’m fine with this, I don’t care. Rich and famous men are rich and famous in order have sex with women they wouldn’t be able to with they were not rich and famous. And her dating history suggests she loves having sex with the elderly rich. But… I think we should look at Al’s record of reproduction.

Um. OK. Not great. But the first kid is a bit of a crapshoot, let’s be honest. And her mother was a mere civilian, famous-adjacent at most.

Oh, wait. No. She was gorgeous in her youth.

Let’s move on.

This is what Al did with Beverly D’angelo’s DNA.

This is Beverly D’Angelo

Not great work, Al.

Hopefully this grandpa-fucking Kuwaiti heiress can do something with Al’s scrotum-goop these two beautiful ladies could not.


 

A very insightful video essay on a body horror sub-genre. I really like his videos. And he discusses one of my favorite obscure movie, Altered States (1980).


 

Hundreds compete in famous cheese-rolling event in Gloucestershire

Hundreds of people hurled themselves down Coopers Hill in Gloucestershire today for the world-famous cheese-rolling event.

The winner was even knocked unconscious while running down the hill chasing a 3kg (7lb).

People arrived at the hill near Brockworth hoping to see a spectacle, as competitors prepared to chase the wheel of Double Gloucester.

There had been concerns raised over the safety during the race with emergency services confirming that they would not be present at this year’s event.

The female race was won by Delaney Irving, who was actually knocked unconscious at the finish line.

The 19-year-old told ITV News West Country: “I decided yesterday that I would do the race and then I started running.

“I remember hitting my head and now I have the cheese. I kind of blacked out for most of it.”

Posting about her win on social media, she said she had only realised she had won the race when she woke up in the medical tent.

Every man dies. Not every man really lives.”

She got that cheese. Does anything else really matter?


 

About The Author

SugarFree

SugarFree

SugarFree hates author bios.

122 Comments

  1. Count Potato

    “I’m fine with this, I don’t care.”

    I don’t either, and there hasn’t been much outrage about it either.

    • Count Potato

      I also kept reading “Al” as “AI”.

  2. Sean

    She got that cheese. Does anything else really matter?

    Wife material?

  3. DEG

    She got that cheese. Does anything else really matter?

    No.

    • Sensei

      So close, no matter how far
      Couldn’t be much more from the havarti
      Forever trusting who we are
      And nothing else matters

      • db

        Bravo!

      • db

        Is that from the Yellow Album?

    • Animal

      Is she gouda looking?

      • Shpip

        Having good looking offspring is a top priority when push comes to chevre.

  4. Scruffyy Nerfherder

    Al’s scrotum-goop

    Wasn’t that a Paul Simon song?

  5. Not Adahn

    Maybe Al’s kink is watching really ugly dudes bang his wife?

    • Not Adahn

      I should probably volunteer.

    • Fourscore

      I travel in the octogenarian circles. I think the pool boy has a smile on his face in the morning. Looking at the previous family those kiddos don’t look Italian.

  6. JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

    “There had been concerns raised over the safety during the race…”

    I thought that was the whole point of the race.

    • Not Adahn

      It’s probably against the rules to bring a toboggan.

  7. Certified Public Asshat

    Say hello to my little friend always gets the ladies hot and bothered.

  8. Timeloose

    Beverly D is one hot number. Al must have an extended family where he is the looker with the recessive genes.

    Love and Rockets was great in concert two weekends ago. They still have it, quite a good mix of psychedelic and glam rock and roll. The only down side was they were seriously under powered on the PA level. Gary Numan was on before them and had so much more sonic power.

    • The Other Kevin

      I have to find that tour! Would love to see them again. My first concert in high school was Love and Rockets/Pixies.

      • Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

        Dope mix.

      • Chafed

        Sounds like a great show.

    • Brochettaward

      Is Al Pacino really considered that good looking?

      • Tundra

        He was pretty handsome in The Godfather.

      • Mojeaux

        He never did anything for me, even as a young man. That said, I think Tommy Lee Jones is hella attractive. Notice I did NOT say he was good looking.

  9. The Other Kevin

    That song is like a religious experience. I think it’s their best. It’s also one of the few songs I can play on guitar.
    When you’re down
    It’s a long way up
    When you’re up
    It’s a long way down

    Superb.

  10. Tres Cool

    Love & Rockets is just Bauhaus w/o Peter Murphy.

    And if they were Vitamin D deficient, they would be…..Love & Rickets.

    /shows myself out

  11. Certified Public Asshat

    DeSanctimonious is now making a show of promising to fire FBI Director Christopher Wray, but DeSantis voted FOR Wray’s confirmation in 2017, praising him as “talented, capable & highly respected.” https://t.co/PQuMADaq4s— Trump War Room (@TrumpWarRoom) May 30, 2023

    Oof, community noted.

    • Brochettaward

      Trump nominated the guy in the first place. The Trump War Room account may want to rethink this one a bit…

      • R.J.

        I am sure he did look like a good choice originally.

      • Brochettaward

        I’m sure the little swamp creature RINO’s Trump surrounded himself with were big fans and made a very good case to Trump why this guy would be different than the last guy.

        Trump’s biggest mistake was basically letting McConnell and his ilk staff his administration.

      • R.J.

        Agreed.

      • Chafed

        His confirmation was uncontroversial. The 5 votes against him were all Democrats.

      • Drake

        This – what a reverse own there. And Trump could have fired him at any time over the next 3 years.

        Trusting insider finks and his son-in-law really was his downfall.

      • Lackadaisical

        ‘Trump could have fired him at any time over the next 3 years.’

        Exactly, what a maroon. It is one thing to get hoodwinked in regards to someone’s character but if you actually have the means to switch them out, it’s really all on you.

    • Ted S.

      The House votes to confirm the FBI director?

      • Ownbestenemy

        Well…he was going to run for the Senate and that is just like voting for his confirmation.

    • Ownbestenemy

      I am starting to think Old Man is right. Time to start polishing off the term Madame President

      • R C Dean

        At this early point, my money is on the bag of hair gel from CA.

      • R.J.

        God save us if that guy gets in the White House.

      • one true athena

        The Hair Gel That Walks Like a Man certainly thinks he’s running, and he wouldn’t be making a move without approval, imo. My guess is Biden/Newsom on the expectation that Biden will die in office. If I was plotting this novel, Kamala would be shot by some Patriot Front sacrifice play, but it’s probably easier to dump a scandal in the news to get rid of her.

      • Animal

        Her rise to political prominence atop Willie Brown’s penis wasn’t enough scandal to do her in. What else they got?

      • Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

        She makes HRC look likable in comparison?

      • one true athena

        Her rise to prominence atop his prominence was what got her in though, so that was never gonna work.

        Mistreating her staff, maybe? there’s already been articles about that. Get somebody to file harassment or something like that against her, they can drop her from the ticket. it just seems easier to manufacture something Biden can use as an excuse to drop her, and then shut her up with some payola. Otherwise I gotta think she’d demand something pretty big to leave quietly.

      • Old Man With Candy

        She’s your next president. Team Blue has already jettisoned debates, so when she steps in after Joe’s departure (one way or the other), she will be anointed.

  12. DEG

    James O’Keefe interviewed RFK, Jr. Trailer at the tweet, full interview is only available to those that subscribe to O’Keefe Media podcasts.

    • DEG

      Dammit. I should have saved the image.

      • DEG
  13. Tundra

    God, I love that song. And Daniel had the greatest hair.

    It was really a good hair decade.

    I don’t give a fuck about AP knocking up a 29 yo, but the prude part of my character thinks it’s kind of shitty to do to a kid.

    • Chafed

      Yes

      Yes

      Yes. He is unlikely to live to see his kid turn 10. That seems really questionable to me.

  14. Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

    I have been on a huge Bauhaus kick lately, so that music choice is just right. Seriously, my doctor mentioned that Kevin Haskins was DOING his friends 50th, Love & Rockets played in Portland the other night… They have just been everywhere.

    • Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

      DJ not doing.

    • R.J.

      Poor guy. At least he made it off stage. He didn’t do a Tiny Tim. I blame those skin tight dress pants.

      • Tres Cool

        Or a clot shot.

  15. Count Potato

    “EXCLUSIVE: Convicted pedophile Jeffrey Epstein continued to ‘entertain’ up to SEVEN young girls a day – and was so obsessed with their teeth he had a dentist’s chair at his mansion and forced them to go to an orthodontist, his private diaries reveal

    Jeffrey Epstein continued meeting dozens of young women after his sex crimes conviction with up to seven girls visiting him in a single day, his private calendars reveal.

    And the teeth-obsessed pedophile – who had a dentist’s chair in his Florida home and another on his Caribbean island – often sent the women to a Manhattan orthodontist, the documents show.”

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12144853/Jeffrey-Epstein-entertained-seven-young-girls-day-private-calendars-reveal.html

    • Chafed

      Do those same diaries tell us anything about who else spent time with these girls?

      • Count Potato

        Yes, but nothing conclusive.

      • Tres Cool

        “Elon Musk received a 5-star welcome during a surprise trip to China as the nation….”

        Im curious about the journalize-img here- Whats a “5 Star welcome? Whats a 4 star? Are we doing YELP! reviews?

      • Count Potato

        Yelp keeps deleting my review of Hotel California.

      • R C Dean

        He’s the richest guy in the world and has significant investments in China. Obviously, the only reason he would be wined and dined is he is Xi’s cockholster.

    • Lackadaisical

      Not a fan of revealing private details of people, but at the same time I don’t really want any British royalty allowed to set for on our soil.

  16. Drake

    I saw Altered States back when I was in high school. I should probably watch again. Came out about the same time as “Scanners”. Both good creepy sci-fi.

  17. Count Potato

    Does anyone else think Mark Zuckerberg looks like H.P. Lovecraft?

    • Drake

      Or somebody who’s soul was destroyed by one of Lovecraft’s monsters.

    • one true athena

      the real one or the robot?

    • Drake

      He’s one of us?

    • Ted S.

      The right size for Tres.

      • Chafed

        Lol. He’s the right size and his breasts are small enough. Tres may fall in love.

      • Tres Cool

        In prison he’d get titty-fuck fo’ sho’

    • R.J.

      That doesn’t look like 308 pounds.

    • Sean

      He misses Trump.

    • DEG

      It’s because he’s so lonely.

      • Lackadaisical

        Ronery*

      • Tundra

        That scene is amazing. The Hummel collection makes me lol every time.

    • Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

      308 pounds is more like 7.62 Kardashians.

  18. Brochettaward

    I am in the process of establishing a Quick Firsting Force that can respond in real-time to the Firsting needs of the Glibertariat. They will be tasked with the all-critical task of inserting key, and most important timely Firsts into the Firstline to stave off catastrophic seconding levels. They will be primarily focused on making up for the seconding of UCS, The Hyperbole, and Count Potato, though not limited to just offsetting those three culprits.

    Be advised.

    • The Gunslinger

      Do you know who else liked to insert fists?

  19. DEG

    Pierre Poilievre actually went there

    For those who don’t get the reference:
    There has been a long-running unconfirmed rumour that
    @JustinTrudeau
    was forced to leave his teaching position because of an inappropriate relationship he had with a student that resulted in the student signing an NDA.

    The story had been reported in an objectively fake-news website called the Buffalo Chronicle. But it had been reported elsewhere as well.

    To everyone in the political world, it seemed to be a Harvey Weinstein-esque open secret. And here
    @PierrePoilievre
    seems to be sharing that open secret quite loudly or, at the very least, repeating the rumour.

    • Brochettaward

      One aspect of the parliamentary system I am insanely jealous of is that we don’t get to trot the president out and make him defend himself in front of Congress. Let the opposition take shots at him and humiliate him. Our presidents end up on a pedestal where they don’t ever have to be involved in an adversarial interaction publicly.

      • R.J.

        Yes. I would also like to see on-floor fisticuffs come back.

      • Drake

        Or Andrew Jackson whaling on people with a hickory stick.

      • R.J.

        “Meet Mister Thwackum”

      • Drake

        Wasn’t always that way. Back when we were a Constitutional Republic, Presidents were more like employees in charge of security and foreign relations. James Polk would spend an afternoon every week at a desk on the White House lawn hearing requests from whoever showed up. He was old school, so he usually said “no” then “piss off” if they had a problem with the “no”.

      • creech

        Of course Polk was also a bit of a swelled head. First Lady (no Doctor)Sarah Polk instructed the Marine Band to play “Hail to the Chief” whenever Polk entered an official function, an imperial flourish which still is practiced (“Hail to the Thief” would be more appropriate.)

  20. Count Potato

    Does anyone know what tomorrow night’s movie is?

    Also, our calendar looks pretty empty. Maybe I should just write stupid shit as filler?

  21. robc

    Ive got a stupid article I plan to write up this afternoon. Data already collected, now I just need words.

    • pistoffnick

      …now I just need words.

      Words to memorize, words hypnotize
      Words make my mouth exercise
      Words all failed the magic prize
      Nothing I can say when I’m in your thighs

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QHapDS2fcFE

      • Tres Cool

        I hate that I dont hate myself for liking that stupid song.

    • Ownbestenemy

      I’m in the camp it’s an active poster not a lurker

      • Tundra

        Maybe. A bunch of those puns look verbatim.

    • Not Adahn

      Christie’s campaign team is touting him as a well-rounded politician with very wide appeal who will address the heavy issues Americans are most concerned about. “He brings a gravitas other candidates lack,” said a spokesman for the campaign. “Only Christie can tackle the broad range of problems we face in this country.”

      It’s not Swiss though.

      • DrOtto

        Wouldn’t rule it out. Could be like the anti-homo preachers that get caught with male prostitutes.

    • creech

      Missed how he once slurped Obama.

  22. Certified Public Asshat

    April O’Neil and The Turtle Brothers get in over their heads when an army of mutants is unleashed upon them in the trailer for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem. pic.twitter.com/Vd4cdrHrvL— IGN (@IGN) May 31, 2023

    This franchise is still dead.

    • Scruffyy Nerfherder

      If it wasn’t before, fat lesbian April should kill it

    • CPRM

      looks like someone uploaded it before the kid was done coloring it all the way with his crayons

    • DEG

      I thought of the porn star April O’Neil.

      • Mojeaux

        We call those “faith promoting rumors” in my church, aka “urban legends.”

      • Mojeaux

        Oh. Joke’s on me.

        “Thankfully they both died.”

  23. The Late P Brooks

    Surprise

    The Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms, and Explosives on Tuesday released clarification for gun owners and potential gun owners with Minnesota’s recreational cannabis bill officially signed into law.

    According to the ATF’s St. Paul Field Division, the Federal Gun Control Act of 1968 prohibits anyone who is an unlawful user of any controlled substance – as defined by the later Controlled Substances Act of 1970 – from “shipping, transporting, receiving, or possessing firearms or ammunition.”

    Despite the recreational cannabis bill being signed into law in Minnesota, a current user of cannabis is still, under federal law, defined as an unlawful user of a controlled substance.

    It’s for your own good.

    • Tres Cool

      Its built-in. Feature, not bug.

      • Tres Cool

        Now do Hunter Biden.

      • juris imprudent

        My guess is the govt is going to say an ATF canine ate that 4473.

  24. Fourscore

    10 minutes ago something caught my eye outside on the step, I thought it was a dog, but noooooo, it was a short guy in a black fur coat. He checked out some empty trash cans that I was using in the garden, walked down the driveway, went to the gate on my garden, walked around the fence and disappeared into the woods. Not a big feller, 125-150ish, I’d guess.

    He didn’t look at the bees, I’m guessing he’d been there and learned how an electric fence works. I had just came in the house 10 minutes before from cutting grass.
    The way he checked the trash cans I’m guessing that’s how he eats.

    • Count Potato

      That’s both odd and sad.

      • Not Adahn

        *psst*

        he’s not talking about a human.

      • Tundra

        He knows. Bears are kind of dopey losers.

      • rhywun

        Heh, went over my head too.

      • Penguin

        Yeah, I thought “that’s weird, I thought Fourscore lived far enough in rural areas to not have any homeless around.”

        The fur coat comment and the bees comment should’ve clued me in

    • rhywun

      Yeah I’m going to have to respectfully decline to comment on this. WhoTF knows what really happened?

      give me pause

      Very much so.

  25. The Late P Brooks

    The way he checked the trash cans I’m guessing that’s how he eats.

    It’s a pic-a-nic basket desert!