THE RESISTANCE: Episode 5

by | May 14, 2025 | Sugarverse, THE RESISTANCE | 130 comments

“I love tacos!’ Sandy said brightly, then used her huge teeth to savage the Old El Paso hard shell. “Authentic Puerto Rican cuisine!”

“Close your mouth when you chew, filthy beast,” Rashida growled.

“I’m the presumptive nominee,” Sandy said, iceberg lettuce falling from her mouth.

“Sheeeeeeeit,” Jasmine sneered. “It should be a BIPOC, preferably a FBA.”

“Isn’t time for a gay man?” David asked, his legs crossed in a way no one with testicles could ever manage.

IIhan hissed at him. “What are you even doing here? You were forced out.”

“Do you want to appeal to young White men, or not?” he asked her. “Because I’m all you got, sister.”

“At least Fetterman is taken care of,” Alanna said. “The media got him cooked.”

“And Shapiro,” Rashida said, and spat on the floor.

“Yes, all the Jews are gone,” IIlan said, smiling.

“Josh Shapiro was a Jew?” Sandy asked. “Huh.”

“All that oppose us are Jews, one way or another.”

“It is a shame, though,” David said. “He spoke to the hoodie and basketball shorts crowd.”

You’ve got a BIPOC/FBA right here,” Jasmine said, twerking until she farted loudly. “Black, so I got that first part, and I’m a Foundational Black American. We built this country.”

“It should be Pete,” Hogg said. “People love gay men that adopt. He’s so middle-class.”

“No White men!’ Jasmine screamed.

“I can’t believe we would cater Mexican food,” Rashida said, “Especially given that we don’t have a Mexican candidate in the pipeline.”

“Hello”” Sandy said indignantly. “I’m right here!”

“People are tired of Puerto Ricans,” David said. “They are down in every poll of Democratic voters. “You’re so disliked, you might as well be White.

“Is Pete gay enough? Can Jasmine have crossover appeal to Trump Whites? Can we keep a Jew off the ticket?” Rashida mused.

“Why do I never get to be the narrator?” Sandy asked, pouting again.

“You too stupid, stupid,” Jasmine snapped, ripping out part of her weave and using it to whip the not-brown enough woman.

About The Author

SugarFree

SugarFree

Your Resident Narcissistic Misogynist Rape-Culture Apologist

130 Comments

  1. Rat on a train

    Hogg is resistance inside the resistance now.

    • Nephilium

      It’s resistances all the way down.

      • Rat on a train

        The Resistance is feudal.

      • Pope Jimbo

        The mantra of the Resistance is “ohm”

  2. Sean

    It’s not even satire…

    • bacon-magic

      I thought I was reading from a Project Veritas undercover sting.

  3. The Late P Brooks

    A peek at the next gen brain trust. I am infused with hope for America.

    • EvilSheldon

      Politics is theater for ugly people, and science for stupid people.

  4. DEG

    “Josh Shapiro was a Jew?” Sandy asked. “Huh.”

    AOC hot and bothered? Or regretting a tryst? Or thinking ahead?. Or embrace the power of “and”?

      • ron73440

        Right now, Riley works for a brand called HomeBinder, which is “an online home management platform for modern homeowners,” per his LinkedIn. He also owns and runs a user-experience consulting company that helps start-ups grow their businesses.

        What does that mean?

        Are those real jobs, or does he need his relationship with AOC to make them profitable?

      • UnCivilServant

        Ron, that sounds like either a no-show job at a money laundering joint, or astartup that failed years ago but nobody told the staff the paychecks were never going to come.

      • DEG
      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        And he even has a literal beard!

      • Contrarian P

        Well that was 2022. Three years later and I guess the engagement is still going. If I were him I would have jumped ship by now.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      Aoc is too high profile to be a vp candidate

      Yeah that definitely came from reddit.

  5. ron73440

    <blockquote.“Isn’t time for a gay man?” David asked, his legs crossed in a way no one with testicles could ever manage.

    It’s the little details that make it great.

    • WTF

      Yes, that was the first laugh out loud line for me.

      • R C Dean

        Same.

  6. PutridMeat

    FBA

    Thing is, ‘Fakest Bitches Around’ also works in context.

    • Sean

      Fucking Big Asshole?

      • PutridMeat

        I thought they wanted Pete out?

  7. Nephilium

    Huh, I figured FBA was female born American for a while.

    • R C Dean

      Yeah, I had never seen that acronym before, but I have no doubt it refers to descendants of slaves. Gotta keep those actual black Africans out of the club.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Don’t have to worry about that. The local Somalis are much more interested in keeping the FBA’s out of their club.

        Tons of friction between our newest vibrant neighbors and the FBA’s. Mostly because the Somalis are very vocal about not coming from slave stock.

  8. Rat on a train

    🎶We built this country on sweat and toil.🎶

  9. B.P.

    I had to find out if FBA is a real thing, and apparently it is. Wikipedia’s collection of FBA acronyms took me to this guy…

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tariq_Nasheed

    …who apparently established the concept. He seems like a real treat…

    “Nasheed is known for his use of the term “bed wench” and the related term “Negro bed wench mentality”.[7][20] He uses the term to refer to black women who date interracially. He revived and popularized use of this term, which historically was used to disparage black women who were raped by their masters during slavery.”

    Keepin’ it real.

    • EvilSheldon

      Progressivism exists so assholes can get attaboys from other assholes for their assholish behavior.

      • Ted S.

        Another reader of David Thompson’s blog, I see.

      • EvilSheldon

        No, as a matter of fact. I should start.

    • Nephilium

      Fuck assholes like him. I remember chatting with several female black coworkers back in the day, and they all said their family would flip if they brought a white boy home. One of the black guys I worked with had a white wife, and would brag about it all the time, but never around the black girls.

      • Pope Jimbo

        When the OJ trial started I was living in Memphis. Most of the local black women were more than happy to have OJ convicted because he married a white woman.

    • SugarFree

      Would I lie to you?

      • Ted S.

        Yes, you would.

      • Not Adahn

        Only if it were more entertaining than the truth.

      • R.J.

        What Not Adahn said!

      • UnCivilServant

        I’m going to have to agree with my fellow Glibs (for a change).

      • Bobarian LMD

        In the foetid, fever dream swamp of your mind, how could you discern truth or fiction?

      • juris imprudent

        It wouldn’t so much be a lie, as an inappropriate cross-over from one of the other time-lines you have access to.

      • Evan from Evansville

        “Isn’t time for a gay man?” David asked, his legs crossed in a way no one with testicles could ever manage.”

        Goddamm, my favorite. Scratch that. (STEVE SMITH NO SCRATCH!!)

        “You too stupid, stupid,” Jasmine snapped, ripping out part of her weave and using it to whip the not-brown enough woman.”

        Fuck my ass sideways, that’s Gold.

    • ron73440

      My wife was watching some dating reality show (thank god she has quit those) and a black girl was worried about her Dad finding out she was dating a white guy. Her quote “He’s not racist, but he’s into black power, black education, and making sure blacks have a good future and don’t race mix.”

      The host was very sympathetic, but I remember thinking that if you swapped the black and white in the situation, you 100% would have a racist dad.

      • UnCivilServant

        I wonder how many people stop and do a bias check by swapping the immutable criteria and seeing if their opinion changes.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        They explain it to themselves by saying “black people can’t be racist!”

    • juris imprudent

      So there is a black Andrew Tate.

  10. Jarflax

    Maybe it is Poe’s law in action, but this felt tame and possibly understated.

    • Gender Traitor

      Perhaps to lull you into a false sense of security..

    • slumbrew

      Don’t poke the bear.

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      It’s tame. Too tame.

      • juris imprudent

        Not too much concern as a one-off; it’s when 2 or 3 are strung together, then you know something truly wicked this way comes.

  11. Suthenboy

    Fetterman is the only one they have with a chance of getting a single genuine vote. They are trying to get rid of him now. If they are successful they will be a 100% circus of evil morons.

    A. What if they end up stuck with him and have to push him after a campaign to label him incompetent?
    B. They are fucked?
    C. I am delighted looking at the state of their party today but too far out to make any kind of prediction. Lets see how the midterms go.

    • R.J.

      A. 30% of the country is certifiably insane and will vote for dems even if they propose that everyone chop off their left hand to make amends for colonization.
      B. The repubs are LEGENDARY for shooting themselves in the foot. I don’t know how they even have feet anymore. Expect something big, amazing and stupid in the next four years. Not so much from Trump as by the republican hoi polloi downranks.
      C. It will still be quite close in midterms, and for the next election.

      • Suthenboy

        B. Put a giant red, flashing , neon check mark next to B.
        Do not try and convince me they dont do it deliberately.

        Where is my Obamacare repeal?

      • Bobarian LMD

        The republican establishment will decide someone like the Dread Pirate McCain or Rubio should be the successor of OMB and no one will show up for the election.

      • SarumanTheGreat

        “The repubs are LEGENDARY for shooting themselves in the foot”

        I agree with Suthenboy that it’s by intent.

        The GOPe don’t want to win. They just want to grift, as the loyal impotent opposition. I include Rand Paul in this.

        Bobarian: The cage fight between Rubio and Vance for the 2028 nomination will be epic. Corrupt DC insider with all the political connections vs. photogenic well-spoken outsider with all the tech bros on his side.

      • Ed Wuncler

        SarumanTheGreat:

        I still like Rand Paul but sometimes I feel like he complains for the sake of complaining. He’s against the tariffs which is fine, but he doesn’t explain what’s the alternative is and addressing people’s concern that we are being taken advantage of by other countries at the expense of our industrial base. Not saying that this is true but saying that sometimes the perfect free market answer isn’t what people need or want to hear.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Rubio… That’s cuban for Romney.

      • juris imprudent

        people’s concern

        Idiotic superstition you mean? No other country is fucking us over, our own businesses that outsource – THEY’RE the ones doing the fucking part.

      • R C Dean

        “Expect something big, amazing and stupid in the next four years. Not so much from Trump as by the republican hoi polloi downranks.”

        Oh, I wouldn’t count out Mr. Warp Speed, we’ll give you trillions if you lock down your state.

      • R C Dean

        “Where is my Obamacare repeal?”

        We can’t do that or we’ll lose the midterms!

        Narrator: they lost the House in a “blue wave” in the midterms.

      • Contrarian P

        Sorry, there isn’t going to be a repeal. Hospitals, private equity, insurance companies, and physician practices spent trillions of dollars on making everything compliant with that law. It’s an enormous sunk cost and there’s no money to be made from changing things. The overwhelming majority of Americans don’t really see how much costs increased because of Obamacare. Plenty of voters really believe that eliminating Obamacare would result in people dropping like flies. There’s just no constituency for getting rid of it, no matter how much of a disaster it is.

      • bacon-magic

        I’m still a Rand Paul fan but his stance on the tariffs is ludicrous. It’s not a free market whatsoever now. If you think it is you need to put the pipe down.

    • rhywun

      Half the country will vote Democrat regardless of who is on the ticket. So while it amuses me to speculate that the party is swirling down the drain, I’m afraid what will happen instead is the next president will be some crazy wacko like one of these Squad ladies and then we are well and truly fucked.

      • EvilSheldon

        I suspect we’d be more fucked with a competent retail politician like Shapiro or Newsom.

      • kinnath

        Half the country doesn’t vote.

        At best, half of half of the country votes Democrat.

      • rhywun

        Case in point…

        That is just astonishing.

        And 2nd place is a literal communist.

        LOL soooo glad I got out of there.

      • B.P.

        I don’t think it matters who the Dem nominee is for president, as the party is run by a cabal that foists policy on the public no matter who is at the helm. I don’t think anything would’ve been different for the last four years if Bernie Sanders had won the nomination and the presidency in 2020. We had a president who was mentally absent for who knows how many of the years 2021-2025. If I recall, Bernie was initially against some of the open borders and woke stuff during his presidential runs, preferring to focus on the proletariat, but quickly buckled when the folks in charge of the party told him what was acceptable.

    • ron73440

      A. What if they end up stuck with him and have to push him after a campaign to label him incompetent?

      Wouldn’t faze them at all.

      They would be like Rick James:

      “I wouldn’t dig my feet in no man’s couch, I got more sense than that.” “Yea, I remember digging my feet into Eddie Murphy’s couch”

      Not even a pause between the 2 sentences.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      D. The Republicans run someone worse than Stroke Shrek again anyway.

      • UnCivilServant

        I hear George Santos is available.

  12. Gustave Lytton

    Puerto Ricans without a snazzy R&H number?

  13. Derpetologist

    If I had the talent, I’d write a tale whereby one or more of The Squad are invited on The View. That would be a critical mass of stupidity.

    In other news, there’s a welding shop 2 miles from my apartment. Getting a job there would be convenient. It’ll have to wait til the fall after I finish round 2 of welding school, electric arc boogaloo.

    • Drake

      Woopie Goldberg in a SugarFree story is a frightening thought.

      • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

        Tlaib might refuse to appear if Goldberg is there.

    • Suthenboy

      Never heard of her before. I saw Tokuda and gun control and thought ‘Hawaii’.
      Fuckin’ Hawaii needs to be brought to heel.

      • UnCivilServant

        This is why you don’t directly annex a Kingdom.

      • Suthenboy

        I was thinking the same thing. I think we had to for strategic reasons. The native population is wildly better off than if we had not but culture is something you cant wash off with gasoline, love or money. Now we are stuck with them.

        I have had some good Hawaiian friends but damn, you dont have to start throwing fists every time someone gives you a narrowed gaze or bumps into you in a crowd. Also, property crime there is ridiculous. If they adopt some kind of castle law there would be carnage.

      • UnCivilServant

        The original Annexation of Hawaii was not about US Strategic interests – it was about Sugar taxes. The Hawaiian planters faced being outside of a tariff wall, and most of them had come from the United States, so they staged a coup against the crown and then had their ‘republic’ petition for annexation to get inside the tariff wall.

      • creech

        Didn’t Kamehameha unite Hawai’i by inviting all his rivals to a feast and then murdering them?

    • ron73440

      She almost looks normal, but she does have a little crazy eyes.

      • Suthenboy

        A Hawaiian gun control fanatic. That ‘normal’ you see is because she is in disguise.

        I noticed a pronounced tendency towards violence in some segments of Hawaiian culture. I am sure that is what is behind their attitude towards gun control.

      • juris imprudent

        Give ’em some credit, they’ve seen what the black community does when armed.

      • R C Dean

        Well, the eyes, and the fact she took a sharpie to her jacket.

      • Grummun

        the fact she took a sharpie to her jacket

        I’m guessing “shall not be infringed” isn’t on there anywhere.

      • bacon-magic

        Don’t look up the sex practices of Hawaiian culture. Just don’t.

  14. The Late P Brooks

    Bad news, everyone. Now that the TrumpTariffs have been cut, our ports will be clogged with cargo ships.

  15. robc

    I am posting a comment from another site totally removed from context and unrelated to anything here. It is one of those things that is obvious when I saw it stated, but hadn’t occurred to me previously. Maybe somewhere here will find it as interesting as I do.

    Yes, when you read that places like Chicago are 25% down from their population peak, it’s almost all due to smaller households, not fewer households. A few extreme cases in the rustbelt do have fewer households, such as Detroit.

    • UnCivilServant

      It’s a phased transition in terms of shrinkage. First you have fewer people per unit as people take up the available slack in housing stock. The next stage will be not having enough people to fill the housing units because nobody wants to live there. Then Detroit.

    • SarumanTheGreat

      The road to an episode of Life After People (as I recall they once did a segment on Gary, Indiana).

    • Bobarian LMD

      Detroit is probably on the extreme edge of this, but there are a lot of cities that have abandoned swathes of neighborhoods where urban blight caused the population to move ever further out.

      Saint Louis is another good example where a significant portion of households and population has moved to adjoining counties… Louisville hid some of this by making the “Metro” absorb a lot of those areas.

      • Suthenboy

        This is happening to Alexandria, Louisiana as I type this. Watching it happen in real time is something to behold.

      • robc

        The Louisville thing was a city/county merger. So the other counties in the Metro area, still aren’t in “the city”.

        The merger was how I managed to live in two cities at the same time, Middletown and Louisville.

        I think the old city population was pretty stable.

      • Nephilium

        /looks over at Millionaire’s Row

    • R C Dean

      Much depends on whether you are looking at metro or city limits, as others have noted.

      Also, the cities are being backfilled with immigrants as Americans flee, which is another factor.

  16. Sean
    • DEG

      What could possibly go wrong?

    • Bobarian LMD

      Caster works well in the proper direction, but not so well when going the other way.

      It’s why a Rockford turn is easy to do and easy to get out of hand.

    • R C Dean

      “Police said the driver, 32-year-old Dontae Brown, was arrested for an active warrant he had out of Georgia, but no citations were given in this case.”

      Also, I thought the choice to use a 15 foot chain was interesting.

  17. The Late P Brooks

    Serious news for serious people

    Republicans announced a new tax plan today and it’s just about as bad for America as expected, taking money for healthcare, clean air and energy efficiency from American families and sending it to the ultra-wealthy instead.

    You might think that this helps one of those ultra-wealthy, Elon Musk, who gave hundreds of millions of dollars to ani-EV candidates to help make this happen. But the main source of his wealth, Tesla, will be specifically harmed by rescission of EV credits – and its competitors largely won’t be.

    Now that the republican party has unveiled its job-killing tax proposal, we know a little more about what’s in it.

    Originally, it was thought by many that the proposal would completely kill all federal EV credits, with some estimating that the $7,500 credit would go away immediately (personally, I never thought it would be that stupid, but you never know with the republicans).

    But it’s clear they want to destroy the credit and make cars more expensive for Americans. After all, Donald Trump, while running for an office he remains Constitutionally barred from holding, asked oil companies for a billion-dollar bribe in exchange for ending the EV credit, a promise he has continued to say he will uphold as he squats in the aforementioned office.

    Holy consternation, Batman.

    • slumbrew

      Not giving is taking.

    • B.P.

      “…taking money for healthcare, clean air and energy efficiency from American families…”

      Money for clean air and energy efficiency has been such a Godsend to American families.

      • Sensei

        Pay no mind to the inflationary effects that were less of a Godsend.

      • Necron 99

        Whycome I dint get my monies?

    • Rat on a train

      an office he remains Constitutionally barred from holding
      Just ask a state judge.

  18. The Late P Brooks

    I ant to know what the guy is towing that Saab backwards with. (Sean’s WTF) That thing is PLANTED.

  19. The Late P Brooks

    it’s almost all due to smaller households, not fewer households

    Assuming this is true, so what?

    The Rust Belt has been depopulated because government policy has destroyed job opportunities for decades.

  20. The Late P Brooks

    In the middle of the tow, the sedan’s axle reportedly broke off, leading to what was shown on video.

    Yeah, right.

    It looks like the car is in gear.

    • R.J.

      Well, if it wasn’t junkyard material before…

    • ron73440

      I imagine that could break an axle.

      • R.J.

        It hurts to see it. Just go rent a car trailer from U-Haul. They have excellent car trailers.

    • creech

      Lumpy’s car is still on the road???

  21. The Late P Brooks

    And finally, the real competition for Tesla, gas cars, will not lose anything from the rescission of EV credits. Those cars will continue selling, they’ll just have a $7,500 advantage relative to today – on top of their advantage of each gas car being allowed to choke the world with $20,000+ in unpaid pollution costs, which show up on everyone’s hospital bills and health insurance premiums.

    ——-

    But the oil companies, another competitor for Tesla, will continue to benefit from roughly $760 billion in subsidy per year in the US alone, in terms of the health and environmental costs they impose on society and do not pay for.

    If that subsidy was ended alongside the $7,500 EV credit, then EVs would indeed come out on top. But instead of ending those massive subsidies to fossil fuels, republicans have proposed to increase them, by cutting down enforcement and loosening pollution limits, both through this tax bill and through other agency actions and proposals.

    The only sensible thing to do is ban petrochemical products and confiscate all assets of the oil companies.

    • slumbrew

      $760 billion in subsidy per year in the US alone

      I smell shite…

      • Suthenboy

        Everything in that is shite. Every word.
        The people making policy in this country are bone-crushingly ignorant about every subject of policy there is and it is done on purpose.
        The basic principle behind political correctness that Theodore Dalrymple so eloquently described, the ‘Fuck You’ principle – to force people to go along with the most absurd lies – is at work here. They, like Biden’s absurd appointments, put the most ignorant incompetents they can find in charge of everything because they hate you and want you and your culture dead.
        It is that simple. It isn’t just the MSM who are the enemy of the people.

    • R C Dean

      “But the oil companies, another competitor for Tesla”

      Umm, no, they’re not.

      I’d love to know what went into that $760BB “subsidy”, as well.

      • slumbrew

        I will wager the author thinks allowing accelerated depreciation is a “subsidy”.

  22. The Late P Brooks

    I smell shite…

    If that doesn’t terrify you, they’ll plug some even bigger numbers into the model.

  23. Sensei

    It would seem that the ability to just ask questions is not a six figure skill.

    At the beginning of the corporate AI boom, some companies sought out large language model (LLM) translators—prompt engineers who specialized in crafting the most effective questions to ask internal AIs, ensuring optimal and efficient outputs. Today, strong AI prompting is simply an expected skill, not a stand-alone role. Some companies are even using AI to generate the best prompts for their own AI systems.

    https://www.fastcompany.com/91327911/prompt-engineering-going-extinct

  24. The Late P Brooks

    New! Improved!

    GM is targeting the new batteries and chemistry inside them — called lithium manganese-rich (LMR) prismatic battery cells — to be used in full-size electric vehicles such as its Chevrolet Silverado and Escalade IQ beginning in 2028.

    The new batteries use more-prevalent, less-expensive minerals like manganese instead of larger amounts of cobalt and nickel that are currently used in EV batteries from GM and other automakers.

    Different EV battery chemistries impact everything from the range and safety of EVs to energy efficiency and charging capabilities, among other needs.

    “LMR unlocks the premium range and performance at an affordable cost,” said Kurt Kelty, GM vice president of battery, propulsion and sustainability, during a media event at the automaker’s tech and design campus in suburban Detroit. “It’s a game-changing battery for electric trucks.”

    We’re saved.

    • kinnath

      obligatory link to petroleum battery powered golf cart . . . . .

      • Suthenboy

        All electric vehicles are powered by hydrocarbons.

      • Suthenboy

        I just remembered the conversation I had with a guy who was going to buy an ev years ago. I asked him where the electricity comes from and he pointed to a wall socket and said “The holes”.

        We are doomed.

  25. The Late P Brooks

    In 2021, Barra said GM would exclusively offer EVs by 2035, investing $35 billion between 2020 and 2025. The company has since said customer demand — which has been slower than expected — will dictate its EV plans. It also has not disclosed its total EV investment thus far.

    GM believes the LMR batteries will assist in lowering barriers for consumer adoption of EVs. Most notably, concerns around cost and range. Other hurdles, such as charging infrastructure and consumer education, remain.

    Propaganda harder, America.

  26. kinnath

    https://www.npr.org/2025/05/14/nx-s1-5165561/voting-rights-act-north-dakota-section-1983-private-right

    For decades, private individuals and groups have brought the majority of lawsuits for enforcing the landmark law’s Section 2 protections against racial discrimination in the election process.

    But in a 2-1 ruling released Wednesday, the three-judge panel found that Section 2 cannot be enforced by lawsuits from private parties under a separate federal statute known as Section 1983.

    * * * * *

    That earlier panel found that Section 2 is not privately enforceable because the Voting Rights Act does not explicitly name private individuals and groups. Only the head of the Justice Department can bring these types of lawsuits, that panel concluded.

    Doom, despair, and agony on them.