“It’s hard to not be smug,” Lump purred. “I wanted Platner as my plaything in the Senate, but this will do nicely.”
“I can excuse the Nazi tattoo, and the stalking, and the jacking off in port-a-potties…” John said in a high, quavering Democrat voice.
“But a line must be drawn at raping Democratic flacks,” Lump finished. His delighted cackling filled every warm and wet cranny of John’s mind.
“I do like that he said he’d rape a home invader,” John said. “Because that’s just funny.”
“Help me, homeowner! I’m stuck in the dryer I was trying to steal!” Lump said.
“I never saw what Maine Democrats saw in him,” John said. “He was a ginger fake-oysterman rich kid cosplaying as a working-class guy.”
“The working class leftist is a dream of the Democratic Party; it’s a party of the most extreme elites pretending to care about blue-collar workers and stay-at-home moms, all while shitting on them as low-IQ apes and brainwashed tradwives.” Lump sniffed contemptuously.
“I was a blue-collar hero once,” John said.
“Back when Gisele was running the show,” Lump said.
“I barely remember any of it, like it was an old dream,” John said.
“I’m sorry it took so long to integrate us,” Lump said. “I left you in her clutches for too long.”
“I was going to save the Democratic Party.”
“And now they are about to kick you out of it. They are already lining up the usual gaggle of losers, rapists, DSA rabble, and assorted gingers to primary you.”
“DSA,” John said, and spat in his office trashcan.
“I bet if you dig down far enough into their pasts, everyone in the Democratic Socialists of America are rapists. Socialists love rape. It’s the only way they reproduce outside of universities.”
“Help me, homeowner! I’m stuck in the dryer I was trying to steal!” Lump said.
“I bet if you dig down far enough into their pasts, everyone in the Democratic Socialists of America are rapists. Socialists love rape. It’s the only way they reproduce outside of universities.”
while it is hard to follow an epic guest post in the timeslot, you can still do it
Bernie’s rape fantasy fiction has entered the chat.
It’s funny because it’s true.
Explains their immigration policies.
it’s a party of the most extreme elites pretending to care about blue-collar workers and stay-at-home moms, all while shitting on them as low-IQ apes and brainwashed tradwives.
Incredibly well said.
They are already lining up the usual gaggle of losers, rapists, DSA rabble, and assorted gingers to primary you.
This is the reason the establishment Dems are kissing up to the commies. Not that it will work.
Good one SF, it’s interesting that you took a break from fiction today.
Penna. is closed primary state. Fetterlump will have to urge independents and Republicans to re-register as Dems, even temporarily, to stave off the kinds of cretins and pinkos who will be running against him in the Dem primary.
John said. “He was a ginger fake-oysterman rich kid cosplaying as a working-class guy.”
That’s some projection.
Wouldn’t being an oysterman be considered ranching and not farming?
No, you put horseradish on oysters, not Ranch.
Fish, including shellfish, are farmed.
Fish and mollusks are animals not plants.
Animals = ranching
Plants = farming
Fish, and plankton. And sea greens, and protein from the sea. It’s all here, ready. Fresh as harvest day.
Your definitions are swimming against the tide of common usage.
Also Pig Farmers are not ranchers. Pigs are arnimals and farmed.
Ranching is pretty much limited to very large mammals.
Common usage also includes grammatical atrocities such as “woman police officer” instead of “female police officer.”
And ‘Ebonics.’
“Officerette”, please
Socialists love rape. It’s the only way they reproduce outside of universities.”
From each, according to her attributes, to each, according to his needs.
There’s a lot of rape in this post.
The spirit of STEVE SMITH smiles.
STEVE SMITH MAKE YOUR SPIRIT SMILE, AND BY SPIRIT MEAN SPIRIT ANIMAL, AND BY SPIRIT ANIMAL MEAN SPIRIT ANALMINAL, AND BY SPIRIT ANALMINAL MEAN YOUR CHOCOLATE STARFISH. STEVE CONFUSE SELF WITH BIG ANALOGY. STEVE SAYING HE MAKE YOUR BUTT SMILE.
”
Let the love of truth shine clear!
Let the love of truth shine clear!
Sensibility,
Armed with sense and liberty
With the Lump and John united in a single, perfect sphere
“I was a blue-collar hero once,” John said.
Now you’re just a guy who dresses like a bum.
I resemble that statement.
Powerless
But thanks to the three-year-old court ruling, he said, “all that can likely be avoided by a number of projects just because of where they’re situated now outside of federal jurisdiction.”
The massive scale-back of the water permitting process has been a major enabler for the lightning-fast build-out of data centers across the country.
While hyperscale projects still have to navigate state and local regulations on everything from zoning to fire safety, the federal water permits were once seen as the most onerous part of the permitting process.
Now, data center projects are often flying through the environmental review process — and, at the same time, shrinking their vulnerability to lawsuits from community activists, green groups and federal pollution regulators.
Those poor ecofabulists have lost their veto power. People are actually able to build things. It’s another tragic abuse of power by Trump’s out of control Supreme Court.
More jobs and higher tax receipts?
Higher tax receipts.
Sounds like commie gibberish.
So, a mixed bag? More jobs are a plus, but more money extracted from the tax cattle for government is, well, not a plus.
Twue
I resemble that statement.
So do I. but we’re not United States Senators. I’m not, anyway.
I’d have to tithe to a temple in Boise to even have a chance at that title.
“You’re lucky we’re in Plymouth. If you were in Minneapolis, they definitely would’ve come at you with guns drawn.”
Something tells me a good chunk of the writing staff at The Drive would be all in on the surveillance state.
How Flock Cameras Wrongly Tracked Me for Days Over ‘Stolen’ Plates and Sent Police After Me
https://www.thedrive.com/news/how-flock-cameras-wrongly-tracked-me-for-days-over-stolen-plates-and-sent-police-after-me
Naturally our heroes are immune. And somehow Flock will suffer no repercussions. I’m assuming the stolen plates were a CA registration and not NJ as well.
Never mind – bottom of the article.
A couple of days later, I got a copy of the police report that added a fun kicker to it all. Turns out, the 34 03 DTM plate that kicked everything off was, in fact, not stolen. “One of the fleet vehicles, bearing NJ 34(03)DTM, was used in a photo shoot in Los Angeles. During the photo shoot, that plate for the vehicle was misplaced,” it read. “The corporation had to report the plate as lost to law enforcement. The plate was reported as NJ 34DTM instead of NJ 3403DTM.”
Flock cameras are constantly tracking everyone; it’s the software that pings specifics.
Surrounded by police with hands on their guns.
First time cupcake?
Wait till they bring out the dog.
As the federal government relinquishes oversight of millions of acres of wetlands and streams, it’s also losing its ability to go after companies for damages from data center construction in those areas — leaving it to states to enact and enforce regulations.
And they openly admit that “regulation” equals prohibition.
OT – I mentioned this a week ago or so. Had you read about this stupidity?
https://www.thedrive.com/news/30-years-ago-ferrari-automated-the-manual-transmission-now-its-manualized-the-automatic
In a nutshell, there’s a physical, and traditionally sprung clutch pedal, and a six-speed gate with a quintessentially Ferrari shift lever. However, these two components aren’t mechanically linked to the transmission, only electronically.
Godfuckingdammit.
They are already lining up the usual gaggle of losers, rapists, DSA rabble, and assorted gingers to primary you.
If you didn’t hear that in Harvey Korman’s voice, there is something wrong with you.
I’m not sure I’d recognize that voice. I don’t recognize the name.
I know his name and voice but I don’t get the reference. I may have missed that episode of The Carol Burnett Show.
I believe the reference is to his role in Blazing Saddles.
Dudes. Dudes! DUDES!!!
Let me help:
Like I’d know what Actor Played Hedley. I know all of two Actors in that movie by rela name – Gene Wilder and Mel Brooks.
I can’t believe Presbyterians were excluded.
God darnit Mr. Lamarr, you use your tongue prettier than a twenty dollar whore!
(yes, yes, different scene)
I have been stuck on the couch with vertigo the last 4 days, thanks for the laughs SF.
Sensei- I read that blather as “same dual clutch sequential gearbox with different actuator switch moved away from the steering wheel”.
It’s hard to care. At this point I have absolutely no idea what drives automotive design. In Ferrari’s case, I think they operate on the expectation that as long as it has the logo on it, people will pay whatever they ask.
+1 Luce – The car you will be forced to buy so you can buy a Ferrari you actually want.
It’s exactly the stupidity I’d expect. A not insignificant number of people want manuals. This gives them a way to do that without emissions certification problems and at lower cost. You have throttle by wire – why not clutch by wire?
But take this to next logical place. Just put the same controls in the Luce – program the electric motors to simulate the sensation of “shifting” and pipe the sound of a V12 in the cabin. You can have the same “experience” without annoying the neighbors.
Supercar Blondie and the gaggle of Dubi whores whose sugar daddys but those cars for drive that.
The funny thing is I’m a small unassuming guy and I’ve had the privilege of being spread eagled on the side of car because of a crazy cop.
Something tells me more than a few here have had similar “good times”.
more than a few here
A couple of times, strangely enough usually with relatively diminutive, if all full of “qualified” wink-wink immunity, cops.
Favorite was on a west Texas highway at ~22:00, pulled over for speeding (I was, but pretty sure that was just an excuse…). Now at 6’1″ and big boned (in a totally not Cartmanesque way, honest!), maybe small and unassuming is not the best descriptor for me, but I had to laugh at this one. 5′ 6″ cop, tops, skinny, as I tower over him – “Sir, I need you step down the embankment.” – Incredulous look; “what was that?” – “Sir, step down the embankment, now!”. I just laughed – totally involuntary, an automatic reaction – and took a step down. I’m not sure he really appreciated the laugh.
@Sensei – So far I’ve managed to avoid being pulled over.
Driving a boring car and not standing out from the flow of traffic with my actions seems to have helped not catch the attention of wandering citation dispensors.
Putred.
I had a drill swargent tell me I was too tall and to squat.
Unbeknownst to me my DS was standing behind me and laughed after I refused, not only to squat but call him “Sr Drill Seargent.”
He later tried to get me to stand at ease for him in the chow hall while holding a tray. He was not impressed. Didn’t care.
Watching/listening to ’26 F1 in car camera clips, those cars sound fucked up. Like they have 12 or 15 randomly spaced gear ratios.
I have to confess, I am more interested in F1 this year than I have been in a very long time, just because of the engine rules fiasco.
Like the film Bullitt. Where the cars only upshift.
The Islamic Republic of Japan must be included next week. Unless CPRM uses it for his stolen audio track. Pure gold.
Japan is working on it!
https://mainichi.jp/english/articles/20260609/p2g/00m/0na/026000c
The local population is unhappy with externalities.
“It’s important for the local community to engage with Muslims not based on their identity as Muslims but as individuals,” he said.
The professor, of course, has it backwards. It’s the Muslims who need to engage as individuals and not as Muslims.
JSDF renamed to Islamic Japanese Army. The rising scimitar banner will fly again!
Hawaii is a popular destination for Japanese tourists. You’d think they’d love aloha snackbars.
There’s a group missing from that list but I just can’t put my finger on it…
白人?”
How does one engage with somebody as an individual while disregarding a core part, perhaps even the dominant part, of their personhood?
“Misinformation and hate speech are spreading ”
The truth.
Hope Japan can stomp that out before it spreads.
Was thinking 中国人 , but that works also!
GOJ, for past thirty years: you got to pump those tourist numbers up. those are rookie numbers.
GOJ, hitting 40 million milestone amid weak yen: too much! Must increase departure tax and other fees. Osaka and Tokyo need lodging taxes
Sensei, I was thinking 中国.
Damn Gustave’s nimble fingers!
But take this to next logical place. Just put the same controls in the Luce – program the electric motors to simulate the sensation of “shifting”
Somebody is already doing that, I believe; actually hung a transmission on an electric motor.
Kia – has simulated shifting. I believe Porsche is going to offer it as well.
I don’t think I have any internal or external body parts that might talk to me, which I guess is a good thing. I guess that’s only reserved for The Elite.
All my tentacles have little brains and names. I just told Sammy to stop shooting the tentacle at the web camera during meetings. He literally has a mind of his own.
Speaking of prohibition disguised as regulation
Emissions from the controversial Jackdaw gas field in the North Sea will “not materially influence” global warming, according to a new report from its owner.
Adura’s updated Environmental Impact Assessment (EIA) said the project would account for less than 0.02% of annual global greenhouse gases during its lifetime.
The new assessment was required by the industry regulator, after it found several areas had not been adequately addressed in a previous submission.
The report was ordered by a judge who ruled that ministerial consent for Jackdaw was unlawful, following a legal challenge from environmental groups.
Campaigners had called on the UK government to reject both the Jackdaw gas field and the Rosebank oil field developments.
Any additional emissions are excessive and must be prevented. We should be shutting wells down, not drilling them.
https://screenrant.com/fallout-new-game-obsidian-new-vegas-josh-sawyer/
Huh.
So, four or five years from now, optimistically?
That… may be a bit premature.
Obsidian just lost a chunk of jobs due to layoffs amid the Microsoft/X-Box restructuring.