High Treason Day: Update

by | Aug 8, 2020 | Beer, Food & Drink, GlibFit | 294 comments

In a previous article, I discussed a lawsuit between an owner of a Scottsdale based fitness center and the state, which was eventually tossed out.  A new development was occurred earlier this week.  For reference, the original article is linked here.

This is my review of Huss Brewing Hopaloosa Hazy IPA

The original Executive Order closing down bars, gyms, and waterparks (I know what you’re thinking, “really, waterslides spread the plague?”) was slated to be lifted on July 27.  For those unfamiliar with the judge’s original ruling, his decision was contingent upon a process to apply to reopen.  It is because of this process, which was not even implemented at the time, the judge ruled did not violate the gym owner’s due process.

Fast forward to August 3.  This process still did not exist.  It was here that a dissenting opinion from a health expert got to be heard in court, even if it was from one that put out fear mongering opinions a couple months ago about the hospitals in the state about to break…I guess he removed his head from his ass for an hour.

The current public health overlord in Arizona however, had a mildly Orwellian response to questioning.

Christ, in defending her decision, said she and her staff have more information about the disease than pretty much anyone else, things like data on specific patients.

“The public does not have access to that type of information,” she said. Christ also said she has more access to experts, like the state epidemiologist, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, and the members of the Conoravirus Task force.

“I waste taxpayer funds with commercials instructing dozens of Diamondbacks fans to store their masks in plastic baggies, and I know things.“

“Trust me, I know better.“

Happily, the judge ruled against the state.

“The Executive Orders, as implemented, violate procedural due process,” the 24-page ruling says. “As set forth above, fitness centers must be provided a prompt opportunity to apply for reopening. The process for doing so must be in place within one week from the date of entry of this Order. The Executive Orders, however, do not violate substantive due process.”

”My previous bullshit ruling must not be construed as bullshit.  But the state is incompetent and I refuse to allow them to make a liar out of me…and so…“

Right-wing media seems inclined to call it a win.  I say its a draw, at best.  The attestation form is here in case you want to see how retarded, and meaningless a process this is—or laugh at my state government’s inability to put this together over the course of a month.  Mountainside plans to reopen on Tuesday, August 11th.

No word from my gym, yet… Hopefully they didn’t go belly-up.

 

This beer is interesting because the brewery is better known for making Kölsch ales, and a pleasant variant of one involving coffee.  They also make my favorite lawnmower lager, which I may run out to buy later today. This is a fun combination of the fruity IPA that Yusef loves to hate, but the dank sewer IPA that he seems to enjoy, with a slight bias towards the former.

Yusef should buy this if he is so inclined.  Still even as an IPA it gets a pretty solid rating from me. Huss Brewing Hopaloosa Hazy IPA:  3.0/5

 

 

ETA:  Urge to go shopping for woodchippers….rising.

ETA:  That got shot down.  I might still pick up a woodchipper.

About The Author

mexican sharpshooter

mexican sharpshooter

WARNING: Glibertarians.com contains chemicals known to the State of California to cause cancer and birth defects or other reproductive harm. https://youtu.be/qiAyX9q4GIQ?t=2m22s

294 Comments

  1. Tejicano

    Arizona’s top health official has the surname “Christ”. OK, that makes things a bit difficult to read through after a few beers and a couple shots of Bourbon.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      few beers and a couple shots of Bourbon

      Dude, its 0922. (Not judging)

      • Rebel Scum

        It’s afternoon in the time zone that matters.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Time zones don’t matter unless you are in the pocket of the railroads.

      • TARDIS

        Sid Meier says hi.

        /TARDIS nerd

      • TARDIS

        I would let them all hurt me.

      • C. Anacreon

        Well a couple shots of whiskey, women `round here start looking good,

        A couple more shots of whiskey, I’m heading down to Minglewood.

      • Nephilium

        Glad to see you back around.

      • C. Anacreon

        Thanks, glad to be back among the living ?

      • But Enough About My Prostate

        Excellent.

      • DEG

        Seconded.

      • Grosspatzer

        What Neph said. Good to hear from you.

    • Grosspatzer

      CWAA

  2. BakedPenguin

    I might still pick up a woodchipper.

    You never know when they’ll come in handy.

    Also, when will IPA’s move back to their small section of the beer store? Not everyone likes acrid & bitter as a starting taste profile. I can almost understand Trey with his Milwaukee’s Best Light and Hyperbole with his 30 pack of Stroh’s even if it’s not in direct response to this.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      IPAs are the Devil’s brew and were put on this earth by Satan Himself plus they taste like carbonated diesel fuel.

      • Rhywun

        I got snookered by a waiter into ordering an IPA on a business trip once and the fucking thing turned out to be some sort of doubleplus ultra-IPA. It was literally undrinkable.

      • C. Anacreon

        Hey Rhywun, thanks to you and others for the words of support! Got through the abdominal surgery yesterday ok, and now in a lot of pain, but on the mend. Lots of good discussions here on Glibs the last few threads, much appreciated as a diversion. But you’re all making me laugh out loud too much, and it hurts to laugh….

      • UnCivilServant

        Wait, so you’re saying laughter isn’t the best medicine?

        I’ve been lied to!

      • Rhywun

        Cool. Hopefully you won’t need 11 days in the hospital like I did.

      • egould310

        Didn’t know you were infirmed. Glad you survived surgery. Get well.

      • Threedoor

        Not true. Having drank a few slugs of #2 dyed diesel (who the fuck would put red diesel in a Snapple fruit punch container then put the cap back on it?! My dad that’s who) I can tell you that diesel dosent really have a flavor as much as it has a texture. It’s not surprisingly greasy, slippery and has a viscosity between water and eggnog.

        Now gasoline, that shit has flavor and it’s not good.

      • Ozymandias

        Threedoor – we’re going to need your review to be put into proper sommelier-speak:

        3D’s review of # 2 Dyed Diesel~

        Strong, Snapple Fruit-Punch red tells the discerning eye that this spirit is for a person with gusto. Greasy and slippery texture surprises the palate, bringing mind the slight tackiness of heavy cream, while the burning and searing begins further back on the tongue. Captain Morgan’s pirates undoubtedly drank this when rum was wanting in the late days of a voyage at sea.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      In a couple months it will be Oktoberfest and Pumpkin Ale season again.

      • Gender Traitor

        In a couple months it will be Oktoberfest

        Reminded me – local art museum’s biggest, most popular annual fundraiser Oktoberfest has been canceled “gone virtual,” so they’re concentrating on selling swag. Sorry, DAI, but I’ll be damned if I’m buying a mug or t-shirt depicting your Leo the Lion mascot (formerly the pride of the late, great downtown Steele High School) wearing a goddam mask.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Sorrey

      • Rhywun

        The celebrate-the-plague fetish that is literally everywhere now really grinds my gears. As sure a sign that were are doomed as anything.

      • DEG

        And the real Oktoberfest was cancelled.

        Some relatives of mine had plans to go to Munich this year for Oktoberfest. Fuck.

        They still want to go since there is plenty to do there and in the area, but I’m worried their trip might not happen.

        For some in this group of relatives, it was going to be their first trip outside of the USA. They were really excited about it.

      • Viking1865

        Literally just bought Oktoberfest at the grocery, and could have gotten pumpkin ale if I had a mind to. Which I don’t.

        Beer season creep tests my libertarian bonafides more than anything else. It is August 8th, and yet the summer beers are finished brewing and in the distribution pipeline. There’s a good chance some of my favorite summer beers will be unobtainable before Labor Day.

        The way it should be: The Super Bowl is the end of winter beer season, Memorial Day is the end of Spring Beer season, Labor Day is the end of summer beer season, and Thanksgiving is the end of Fall Beer Season.

      • But Enough About My Prostate

        There’s a good chance some of my favorite summer beers will be unobtainable before Labor Day.

        Dare I suggest hoarding?

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Hellyeah

      • Nephilium

        Couple of months? The pumpkin ales and Marzens are already on the shelf here.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Ever have one when its 110 out?

        Although I’d be happier if Amber Ales didn’t seem fall off the face of the earth.

      • Nephilium

        Nope. Those are my two least favorite styles of beers (besides those with adjuncts I don’t like).

        The decline of the amber ale is a sad story.

      • Viking1865

        Yeah #MeToo. I love amber ales, and they are pretty scarce now.

      • Nephilium

        Around here, there’s still a healthy supply of Irish Reds (which are similar to Ambers), Helles lagers, and (surprisingly) schwarzbiers. Of course, we also have a large number of people with German and Irish roots.

      • Spudalicious

        I can still find North Coast Red Seal Ale.

    • l0b0t

      Let 1000 flowers bloom. But, yeah, they do seem to take up a considerable amount of shelf space at my local beer jobber. I want more porters and stouts, dagnabbit!

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      I’ll see you and raise you a 30 pack of Natty Ice!

      • BakedPenguin

        For me, all of those beers have one thing in common: I might not like the taste, but it’s not so bad I can’t finish it. I had an expensive IPA once, and was asked by the waitress if I wanted another. My answer was along the lines of “not unless you want to clean vomit off the floor.”

      • The Hyperbole

        Yep there’re interchangeable. I drink Strohs out of habit mainly, but I’ll pick up Miller High Life or Bud if there are too many cars lined up at the drive through (the only place with 30 packs near me). Plus it’s just a base beer, I usually have a sixer or two of Hefes or sommat also but I’m not spending over twenty dollars a night drinking 10 or so Weihenstaphaners.

    • DEG

      I was surprised by an IPA recently.

      The manager at one of the local brewpubs recommended it. I decided to try it. I liked it. It reminded me of lemonade in a good way.

      Last night I tried to get some more. They just kicked the keg. Shit.

  3. Gender Traitor

    No word from my gym, yet… Hopefully they didn’t go belly-up.

    I hope so, too. I’m grateful that gyms in OH were able to reopen, including our local YMCA, even if I do have to submit to The Mask on the way in and out. One advantage of swimming as exercise of choice: I’m thinking there’s no way they could require you to wear a mask while in the pool. ::knocks wood::

    • Dr. Fronkensteen

      Mandatory snorkel or if that isn’t good enough mandatory scuba

    • DEG

      There is a place in Nashua with a wave pool where you can surf indoors.

      Folks have called the Nashua police because no one wears a mask while in the wave pool.

      Yeah. Seriously.

      The staff were pretty pissed.

  4. westernsloper

    All this bullshit needs to end now. I have had to put up with sanitizing, re-sanitizing, then re-re-re sanitizing…….blah blah blah. Then I hear of one local jurisdiction placing a big Public Notice up at a community event. ‘We are not sanitizing anything, use these facilities at your own risk.’ One lone community on this side of the mountains with common sense like before the new normal. As far as I am concerned almost every “public health official” in the country deserves a throat punch.

    Not drinking any IPA’s today.

    • TARDIS

      Since I’m in the belly of a Woke Inc., I am benefiting from taxpayer funded largess. My livelihood is not in danger at this time. I can not imagine the stress small business owners are enduring right now. The rage and stress would kill me. If one of those tyrant assholes get what they deserve, and I end up in the jury pool; Not Guilty! I’ll whip up some sweet logic that makes much more sense than that 2+2=5 bullshit.

      Taking away someone’s legal livelihood at gunpoint is armed robbery as far as I am concerned.

    • Rhywun

      Sounds like a liability nightmare to me.

      /not kidding

      • Ozymandias

        Relevant to my comment below about Universal Studios: I’m not mad at businesses because once govt went all-in on declaring this thing the black plague, the risk profiles instantly changed. So did business insurance and all kinds of liability insurance. It all changed on a whim.
        This is why I hate the Media with the white hot passion of a thousand suns: they created this entire panic. In any other year, 2019-20 would simply be a slightly higher year on the CDC reports for “IFLI” – Influenza and Flu Like Illnesses. Without all of the financial mal-incentives to overcount numbers, or to exempt nursing homes from liability, etc. this year would simply be a slightly higher number of “FLI” that appeared to target the elderly. Hell, if not for the interventions of certain governors, the death totals would very likely be significantly lower.

        I hate all of them. Fuck the government and every last piece of shit who wants power over others. None of them can even control themselves.

      • Nephilium

        There was an article about the local music venues, which haven’t been able to be open since March. One of the people commented that only one of the venues is getting paid out by their insurance. I still can’t wrap my head around, this is an unknown flu like illness to this is the death plague that will end the human race in the span of a couple of months.

      • westernsloper

        I don’t get the liability thing. Ya, ok, someone gets the Vid after going to a certain place. There is no way to prove said person got it there and not somewhere else. There is a 99.9% chance said new vid recipient will not die or even get very sick so what real harm was done? People get the flu every year by the millions. Is every place one contracts the flu liable for someone getting the flu? The world has gone retarded.

      • Viking1865

        Because we don’t have the rule of law anymore. You find the right judge, you’ll get a huge payday. Because SCIENCE AND EXPERTS.

      • Ozymandias

        A huge part of the reality of the insurance world is what I call “the churn.” There is an entire class of personal injury lawyers who live on nothing more than the payouts of “nuisance value” by insurance companies who would rather throw the a-hole plaintiff and his leech attorney $15K and be done with it – because it will cost them more to hire their own just to respond to the complaint. In other words, in the insurance world, because (1) attorneys (over)charge by the hour, AND (2) the risks of a PI suit are entirely born by the defendant, PI attorneys live on “the churn.” 10 cases a year is a pretty good living for a dirtbag with a degree. Plus, he gets to act self-righteous about his “calling,” too.

        When govt makes proclamations that this disease is THE WORDST THING EVAH!!1!1!! that becomes a background “law of the case” that very few insurance companies are going to want to tee up – especially given the current “Year of the Karen” – they sit on juries, too, yanno?

      • UnCivilServant

        New Rule – Loser pays damages, loser’s lawyer pays winner’s legal fees, no chargeback to client.

      • Ozymandias

        “Loser pays” would be one of the greatest ways to re-align incentives in the “law as a business” racket.
        Getting rid of the billable hour would be another one.
        I note as an aside that John Quincy Adams and John Hancock didn’t bill by the hour; that bit of legal accounting wasn’t handed down from Sinai. It’s a relatively recent in(ter)vention in the law and no one will discuss just how it misaligns a lawyer’s financial incentives from almost any client’s most fervent desires: quick and efficient resolution of the problem. Billing by the hour encourages a heavy pen and discourages quick resolutions. It should be – by the letter of most Code of ProRes – an unacceptable conflict of interest, but no lawyer will go that route: how else will the elites justify their atrocious hourly rates, show how important they are, and get those loans paid off?

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Sounds like a business opportunity. Create a iPhone app-based concept and get Peter Thiel to fund it.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        Getting rid of the billable hour would be another one.

        We’re 100% fixed fee. It’s better than billable hour, but not the night v. day difference I would’ve expected. Whether or not we’re actually paying by the hour, they’re still tracking by the hour, and Sally SecondYear still gets bitched out when she exceeds hours.

      • Ozymandias

        Pilots need to log flight time by the hour. That makes sense for that profession. Professional Flying Experience is measured in hours of flight time.
        Measuring hours for lawyers makes no sense at all. There is no necessary conjunction between the thing being measured and the end product. You might as well measure calorie output for all the sense it makes.

        Lawyers should be “measured” by legal problems solved/adjudicated, with the understanding that the lawyer should be able to explain to a client what they’re doing for the client – including what value they bring. The lawyer’s competence should be evident to all the relevant principles who come in contact with him/her. That’s what it means to have a “professional reputation.” It is true among (professional) military officers, (professional) pilots, and serious practitioners of any reasonably demanding craft.
        Lawyers should be forced into providing an initial estimate of the value of their services to their client. What’s really going on is that lawyers as a profession got the public to buy off on this nonsense – the “measure” for a lawyer’s time – the billable hour.

      • Gender Traitor

        it misaligns a lawyer’s financial incentives from almost any client’s most fervent desires: quick and efficient resolution of the problem.

        #BleakHouse

      • Cancelled

        I charge a quoted fee for almost everything I do. The one big exception is when a client has a large transaction in process and will be consulting me throughout. There is no real way to quote that up front, because my time commitment is almost entirely driven by how often the client calls me, and some of them want to consult about every detail and every communication from the other side or a third party, while others have me draft a contract, and do revisions, then disappear till it is time for closing documents.

        The other big annoyance I hear from my clients about other lawyers, is the relentless billing of various items that in any other business would be overhead paid by the business. When you bill for a paralegal’s time, and bill for the partner, and two associates at a deposition, you are just being a whore. If the associate can’t be trusted to do the depo without a $450/ hr. partner watching, why are they there? To learn? Train your people on your own dime.

      • UnCivilServant

        I’ve only had to hire a lawyer once – to process the closing paperwork on my house. I paid him $500. I suspect it was a flat fee. The transaction was about as routine as it gets in residential real estate.

      • westernsloper

        It was a county gov sponsored event. I imagine someone would go after a county but most folks (disregarding the new hordes that have moved here) DGAF and live in the real world. Not make believe I am never going to get sick world.

      • Ozymandias

        The lawsuits against businesses that stayed open by people claiming they got the ‘VID there and it killed grandma have already begun. Someone was talking about it the other day but I didn’t get a link to a suit.

      • DEG

        Some of the business liability limitations laws states have been passing require businesses to comply with government guidance in order to receive liability limitations under the law.

        More businesses will mandate masks as a result since the CDC recommends mask wearing indoors.

      • Raven Nation

        “There is an entire class of personal injury lawyers who live on nothing more than the payouts of “nuisance value” by insurance companies who would rather throw the a-hole plaintiff and his leech attorney $15K and be done with it – because it will cost them more to hire their own just to respond to the complaint.”

        When I was in grad school, I worked part-time at a v. large corporate insurance firm (all I did was pay bills) and this was their SOP.

        Every now and then one of the “leeches” would get busted running a scam. I probably shouldn’t go into too much detail, but the lawyer would basically hire someone to go into a place of business and get “mistreated.” Lawyer then filed lawsuit and won something like $10k. But some lawyers got greedy and didn’t realize that places of businesses that were totally unconnected were covered by the same insurance firm. Hilarity ensued.

      • Cancelled

        There is a whole industry around this crap. I knew a guy (an old business partner’s father in law) who ran a service that referred PI clients to various physicians and related businesses (chiropractors, pain management, rehab specialists etc.) who were 1. willing to work on spec 2. willing to pad bills to the breaking point and 3. completely unwiling to ever tell some fraud that his injury was healed/did not exist. All this guy did was provide referalls and he was making mid 6 figures doing it. Absolutely disgusted me to the point where I can barely be civil to a PI attorney to this day.

      • R C Dean

        Thanks for enacting my labor, Ozy. I agree with every word.

      • Ozymandias

        Thank you, RC. I’ve never understood the billable hour. Not ever. It makes zero sense at all.
        What does it say that I can expect better price certainty from my plumber or car mechanic than an attorney – who claims to be a real “professional” and yet is incentivized by his billing practices to take longer to find a solution for my (legal) problem? Your mechanic bills by the hour, too – but even there economics intrudes. i.e. Your mechanic won’t (normally) tell you that he’s just going to keep working on your car for the next week or two – at $80/hr – until a solution suggests itself. The economic pressures of legitimate practices, and widely available knowledge about automotive repair, at least act as a brake on what goes on in cars. In the legal community hourly billing actually drives the profession and is given explicit judicial sanction.
        It’s horrible.

      • R C Dean

        I’ve thought that for a lot of what I do as a corporate lawyer, what I’m really selling is intellectual property. I’ve started copyrighting my policy and contract templates. Sinking time into templates so that you can turn a contract literally in minutes was why I never succeeded in law firms. The clients loved it, I made all the other lawyers look bad, and my billable hours were crap. In a contest between billable hours/revenue and client service, client service lost.

      • Cancelled

        ^this, Not only do the clients love you because your bills are predictable and low, they love the responsiveness you can bring. I just dealt with a fairly complex transaction (basically a long term lease and option) where the other side’s counsel told his client (without even reading my docs or understanding the goals) that he should not use my docs, and in only 2 weeks he would be able to put something together. We are using my docs lol, and I suspect that I will end up with a new client going forward, because I don’t need two weeks to draft a master lease…

      • Ozymandias

        I see you work like I do. Templates for the win.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        Templates are great! Automation is the next step. That’s what I do in my spare time. My goal is that the only button clicks we make are at decision points.

        Analytics is the step after that. One page with all the relevant info to make the decision, and a single button click to implement that decision.

        Tie the templates into the automation and the analytics, and you have a system that reduces the clerical effort as much as is practicable.

        Its easier in an IP department like mine, where it’s mostly commoditized, but it can apply to a lesser extent across legal.

      • R C Dean

        And I mean every comment above.

      • Ozymandias

        Thanks for the kind word. (I wasn’t sure with the threading).

      • TARDIS

        It’s bad enough that this place is being overrun by a bunch of fake libertarian women, but now there’s a bunch of lawyers liars too???

        I keed, I keed.

        *runs away*

  5. mikey

    In These Uncertain Times I’ve found a source of calming wisdom and inspiration.
    Also, I’ll be the star of the next What Are We Reading thread.

    Pocket AOC Wisdom: Wise Words and Inspirational Ideas from Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (Pocket Wisdom) https://www.amazon.com/dp/1784883417/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_taa_ncJlFb926MRA1

    • Rebel Scum

      “I’m used to being on my feet 18 hours a day.”

      If only you spent more time on your knees…

      Cleaning, of course. Idk what you guys were thinking.

      • Tres Cool

        So THAT is what Kamala was doing for Willy? A little….polishing?

      • SandMan

        Those knobs won’t polish themselves.

      • R C Dean

        Err, beg to differ.

    • BakedPenguin

      I have no doubt all the actual wisdom AOC has stated could fit in someone’s pocket. Even in those fake pockets on women’s suits.

  6. Timeloose

    I’m a fan of NE IPA’s. They provide a lot of refreshment and ABV at the same time.

    I’ll down a Heddy Topper then follow it up with a couple of good lawnmower beers.

    Summer fun in the sun.

  7. mrfamous

    Mountainside became my gym early on this year as I kinda saw the direction the winds were heading and also because LA Fitness had continued it’s descent into crapitude by trying to compete with the wave of low end gyms charging 10 bucks a month (with catches, of course).

    I’m not optimistic about what’s gonna go down on Tuesday, but we’ll see. I like to lift heavy and it sounds like the state is going to do everything within it’s power to make that near impossible to do. Heavy bench with a mask on is an absolute 100% no go. If you’re looking for things 10,000 times more dangerous than COVID-19, that would be one of them.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      I assume the public health nannies will be in full on lurk mode at the Tatum/Shea location.

      • mrfamous

        Yes, that would be the one within walking distance of where I live, unfortunately.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        You’re not far from me.

      • Ted S.

        You two should get a hotel room together.

  8. Ozymandias

    The idea that gyms – GYMS! of all fucking places – are the cause of this virus spreading is insanity. We are long past the point when any rational person could think they can justify the utter arbitrariness of the rules. They make no fucking sense.
    The family went to Universal Studios (FL) last weekend and mask mandates were in full effect; so were the “social distancing lines” of tape on the ground. Of course, the way the lines already are set up, this nonsense could only work if the disease traveled solely in straight lines that matched up with the existing lanes, because laterally we weren’t dispersed at all.
    IOW, it’s all fucking theater. It’s completely ridiculous on its face and you would have to be willfully ignorant (or of a double-digit IQ – and I’m not joking) to not be able to see that.
    The judges in these lawsuits are fundamentally engaged in nothing more than this: “government said so and they are top men and get to order you around and I have no say in this ‘cuz I’m just a judge.” Now do immigration, for example – asshole.
    It’s amazing how ‘learned’ these judges become on political issues that they have opinions about, but how completely ignorant and humble they have to be when someone in the Executive even breaths the word “public health.” It’s fucking amazing, really.
    The least dangerous branch is actually quite the opposite when it comes to the rights of the people; And they’ve got wonderful word salads of solipsism to justify it.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      Preach!

      • cyto

        That’s funny stuff.

      • cyto

        And no, I didn’t make it to the end. The joke was 30 seconds. No need to make a 10 minute drudge out of it. That’s what SNL is for.

    • cyto

      Actually, if we had competent state-run epidemiology, that would be an excellent test case. Because waiting in those lines at amusement parks is a perfect vehicle for outdoor transmission. Long term exposures in semi-shielded locations with huge numbers of randomly mixing strangers. If it is easy to transmit via airborne particles, the few positive and infectious individuals who feel like playing at an amusement park would definitely be spreading the virus to dozens and dozens of people over the course of the day. It should be really easy to tease signal from the noise with that case.

      Even better would be if the state set up rapid antigen testing outside the park and required testing to enter. They’d get broad-slice background data on infection rates and cut down on a large possible transmission vector while allowing a large part of the local economy to fully reopen. (I believe they are now at half capacity for distancing reasons)

    • Rhywun

      utter arbitrariness of the rules

      Have 109 pages of complete bullshit rules.

      In case anyone was under the mistaken belief that Cuomo actually wants to reopen schools.

      • cyto

        I heard him nattering on about “protecting our children” the other day. What a bunch of idiots.

        The one group who is not at risk, and we are putting them in a bubble.

        These are the people who love to call their political enemies “science deniers” and proclaim that their policies are driven by science.

      • Rhywun

        I think it’s safe to say at this point that 2021 is going to be canceled too, if our “leaders” get their way.

      • Viking1865

        If the people do The Right Thing and Return Us To Experienced, Adult Leadership then I think the lockdowns will be lifted. If Trump wins, but the Dems pick up seats in both houses, I could see them go for Impeachment 2.0: Coronavirus Boogaloo.

      • l0b0t

        Nice. Didn’t he come up in a discussion on the Zoomie thing?

    • westernsloper

      14K? Do the engines run?

      • l0b0t

        At that price, I would tow it to the marina nearby, moor it, and live on it until it sinks. He started asking $29K back in April, a few weeks ago, it went down to $19K, and now $14K. MOTIVATED SELLER!

      • westernsloper

        What is full hookup dockage at the marina?

      • TARDIS

        Two brunettes and a redhead for sure.

      • l0b0t

        I haven’t looked into it but I assume it’s significantly less than local rents. There are 5 small marinas here within about a 5 miles radius so i assume there is some decent price competition. It would mean putting a great deal of stuff into storage, but that’s only $80 per month.

      • Q Continuum

        ‘Sloper is always talking about the necessity of having a boat after my lynx.

      • westernsloper

        ? Lobot needs to get it.

    • The Hyperbole

      how does he figure 800 sq ft on a 37 ft boat?

      • UnCivilServant

        Two decks tall, ten feet wide?

      • westernsloper

        He just had new carpet installed?

    • KSuellington

      A loan has never been cheaper. Pull the trigger, you can get a 10k loan if you have halfway decent credit. What is the docking fee?

      Also, if you are single that is way more of a lady puller than some studio apartment. Especially if you grow a sweet stache and have this playing in the background.

      https://somafm.com/player/#/now-playing/seventies

      • UnCivilServant

        Unless, of course, the boat is rotting, smells of mold, mildew, and malaria.

      • KSuellington

        Unless the pics are completely lying, that looks to be a good deal. Especially for a place to live for a year or two if you can get into a marina with reasonable live aboard fees. Of course, you have to not mind living in tight spaces.

      • UnCivilServant

        Sales pics are designed to be as flattering as possible.

      • westernsloper

        That boat has very little to rot on it. (Poorly sealed through deck fittings being a common source of rot, I would wager the hull is solid fiberglass) As to mold, bleach kills it. Malaria is only a factor if it is moored in a third world country which NY barely scrapes into the no catigory.

      • The Hyperbole

        He’ll need to start wearing pastels and get a pet alligator.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        You say that like it’s a bad thing.

      • UnCivilServant

        The trip into the sewer to catch one will not be pleasant.

      • R C Dean

        You could probably put it on your credit card.

        If I was solo, I could live “small” like that. Drawback: I don’t see a way to have a pit beast.

    • dbleagle

      Marinas generally charge by the foot, plus electrical and water fees. Unless you want to pump out your holding tanks on a regular basis- add on the latrine/shower fees. Live aboards generally have an additional fee. Parking is often a separate fees. Not saying it wouldn’t be nice, but I don’t see $350/mo.

      I have been a live aboard for several summers on the Puget Sound and SoCal. I enjoy it, but there are limitations as well.

  9. Grosspatzer

    Peaceful Protest or Riot?

    “You’re wrong about that because it’s a political activity. They have expectations for political activities. And it’s also a peaceful protest… ”

    Mostly false, no looting or arson /Snopes

    • cyto

      I don’t see how people fail to understand that Trump is a standup comedian. That’s a freaking great comeback.

      • But Enough About My Prostate

        It is a great comeback. If he keeps doing zingers like that all the way to Election Day, he’s probably a lock.

      • KSuellington

        Yup, and throw in some self deprecating humor now and then. I think he wins by a larger margin than last time.

    • Rhywun

      “Mind your own fucking business.”

      /realDonald

  10. Yusef drives a Kia

    Signal lit! I can find it around here, or my Liquor dealer can get it,
    My buddies Bar is set to open on the 17th, and both A/C units need new compressors.

    • Gender Traitor

      Cha-ching!

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        True, but I’m also starting my Census job at the same time, juggling ahead for me,

      • Ted S.

        Seeing as government employees don’t actually do any real work, you should have more than enough time to do the HVAC job.

      • R C Dean

        Excellent news. Glad to hear you are busy and bringing in some cheddar.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      Yes, I took a swig and said out loud, “That Kia guy would like this.”

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        I always think of you when I drink Double Knot,

  11. Tres Cool

    The little things- I do love it when I get my Big Boy sammich (sans bun) drenched in sauce like it was assembled by Peter North.

    • Rhywun

      So… not-a-sandwich?

      • Tres Cool

        #Keto4Lyfe yo

      • Tres Cool

        The majority of carbs I take in are in liquid form. Tho last week I did eat some onion rings.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Oh hell yes! Bread is rarely eaten with meat at Chez Yusef

      • westernsloper

        Dood, we know what you look like. Folks that have to stand in the same place twice to make a shadow can eat bread. The rest of us, not so much.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        I laughed!!!!!! like Tres Said, I get my carbs from other sources, and love Onion Rings

    • But Enough About My Prostate

      “Assembled.” Uh-huh.

    • JD is in the United Karendom

      Ol’ gay-for-pay Pete used to have a sweet 300ZX. I think he had a custom seat with the donut cushion.

    • cyto

      Wow. That suppressor works stunningly well.

      • Sukkoi19

        The KalashnikovUSA KP-9s are very well made as well. I have two on order but who knows when they will show up lol.

  12. JD is in the United Karendom

    Last week I saw a customer not wearing a talismask in the supermarket. I figured he probably worked there and was off his shift or something, because he was at the checkout with a basket of groceries and the checkout lady wasn’t freaking out. I’m low on beer and even lower on prospects.

  13. C. Anacreon

    Regarding the mask stupidity, yesterday I woke up in post-op after surgery, and they already had a covid mask on my face. The recovery nurse was monitoring my oxygen saturation and kept saying it was too low, I needed to breathe more deeply. I asked “can’t you take the mask off? That’s what’s interfering with my breathing!” But no, rules are rules. So instead of taking off the mask she actually gave me supplemental oxygen via nasal cannula, with all the tubes and nostrils kept under the mask, of course.

    • UnCivilServant

      Could you not remove it yourself?

      • C. Anacreon

        No, I was flat on my back on a gurney, woozy, and my arms secured under the snug blankets.

      • cyto

        Recovery is the weirdest experience. So disorienting. Strange sounds mingling with your dreams to create a bizarre reality where time is fluid.

      • Rhywun

        I don’t get that. I go from fully alert one instant to a couple moments of dooziness to fully alert. No dreams or anything like that.

    • KSuellington

      FFS, what a joke. The masquerade has really taken on a life that I feared might happen. It’s the fact that it is a visible token that everyone can see how much you care. Hope you had a successful surgery and are on the road to recovery doc.

    • cyto

      What that means is that they cannot determine that the air in that area of the hospital is safe to breath. So maybe you were actually better off with the mask. Just sayin’…

      Probably not doing routine testing of patients with rapid antigen tests? But yeah, that’s pretty bad. If you can’t breath the air in recovery without fear of a hospital acquired infection… maybe they need to do some work on their layout.

    • westernsloper

      Now that might be peak stupidity. ? on your soon to be speedy recovery doc.

    • Grosspatzer

      What happened to “First, do no harm”? Is that no longer a thing? Good grief, glad you’re OK.

    • Q Continuum

      We no longer deserve nice things.

    • Rhywun

      I stopped masking two or three days after my surgery. Nobody said a thing, except once when I got a fever and they gave me another ‘vid test, my surgeon says something like “better keep the mask on until the negative result comes back *wink, wink*”. It came back negative, but I was still puking my guts out so I got a tube down my throat to suck out all the liquid for two days. I didn’t bother with a mask from that point on. I made a couple shows of it near the end as the delirium wore off but that’s it. Also during my frequent wanderings around the ward.

      • egould310

        Jesus, Rhywun. Glad you’re out of the hospital. Get well.

      • Rhywun

        #metoo

        It was worth it in the end, believe me.

      • Gustave Lytton

        It was worth it in the end

        ?

      • UnCivilServant

        I presume they fixed the initial problem.

      • Rhywun

        Yes. Multiple problems, actually.

      • Rhywun

        ??

    • DEG

      Sorry Doc.

  14. Nephilium

    In a modern lesson in learning what a word means (and all slang uses) before using a foreign language word to name something. Today’s lesson is Huruhuru, the Maori word for feather… and something else.

    But fuck calling it cultural appropriation.

    • JD is in the United Karendom

      He could have stopped at “it means pubes” but he just had to do the progsplainer to signal his take becauseiwuefhaweuilfhaweuilfhaweuilweuifghUGH

    • cyto

      Yeah, that’s terrible. Only our people can speak our language or use our words? Dumbest thing ever. Good luck getting through life in the modern world without non-maori derived words. Your conversations are going to sound like Randall Munroe’s book Thing Explainer. And you’ll only be able to talk with other Maori. Nicely done.

      Or perhaps you didn’t actually mean any of what you were saying, other than proclaiming victimhood?

      For the uninitiated, Up goer five

  15. R C Dean

    Mrs. Dean’s gym started out in compliance, which is to say, closed. When Ducey allowed outdoor exercise, they reopened because they have a big parking lot. But it’s fucking hot, so people kept drifting into the gym. When Ducey closed gyms again, they just ignored him. They are busier now than they have ever been.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      I ran this morning after my daughter’s soccer practice. I hate myself for doing that.

    • DEG

      Good.

  16. cyto

    Just in case you were curious… people are equally stupid everywhere.

    https://www.cnn.com/2020/08/08/middleeast/beirut-judgment-day-protests-intl/index.html

    After a shipment of ammonium nitrate that had been sitting on the dock for 6 years exploded, destroying a bug chunk of Beirut, protesters are voicing their anger at the political and bureaucratic ineptness that lead to the destruction of their city ….. by destroying more of their city.

    • UnCivilServant

      Are there parts of beruit that aren’t rubble?

    • UnCivilServant

      I’m offended by their replacements.

      • cyto

        The examples shown were pretty dumb.

        Eskimo nebula. I’m not an expert, but I think the “eskimo” is offensive thing was invented by white people on their behalf. Inuit Nebula … would that be less offensive?

        Also, it brings up the “native American” PC terminology. There’s not a single indigenous society in the Americas that referred to themselves as “Native Americans”, so exactly how is that less offensive than “Indians”, which was a mistake about their location? Also, in what possible world is referring to all of the various peoples and cultures of the North American continent as a single name OK, but using one European word instead of another European word not OK? These people were quite often at war with one another. Lumping them together is probably the offensive bit, if you were to actually be taking it seriously.

        And somebody decided “Siamese Twins” was offensive, again on behalf of the people of Siam. Now a country called Thailand. But still a region of the country and referring to several kingdoms of the area. The twins in question were the most famous example of conjoined twins, and billed themselves as Siamese Twins. It refers to those specific people – through whom most of the world learned about conjoined twins.

        So odd that people would have decided that this label was offensive, being that Siam is no longer in use as a country name and therefore really cannot be confused as an ethnic label.

        Also, they say “and planets”, but they don’t list any such labels that are offensive. I mean, there are only 8. And they all have international astronomical union designated names, which are the names that we commonly use. So …. .and planets? Really? Is there something we don’t know about? Is the big “Greece vs Rome” controversy about to rear its head at the international astronomical union?

      • Q Continuum

        “The most commonly accepted etymological origin of the word “Eskimo” is derived by Ives Goddard at the Smithsonian Institution, from the Montagnais (see Algonquian languages) word meaning “snowshoe-netter” or “to net snowshoes”. The word assime·w means “she laces a snowshoe” in Montagnais. Montagnais speakers refer to the neighbouring Mi’kmaq people using words that sound like eskimo.”

        It’s just a catchall for American Indians from the Far North; it does not supersede sub-categories of more specific groups (Athabaskan, Inuit, Cree, etc.) and it certainly isn’t a slur.

        This absurd erasure of history is driven completely by cosmopolitan white liberals who almost certainly have never met an individual of the group they’re trying so desperately to save and assuage their pathetic white guilt.

      • Q Continuum

        I say this as a 4th generation “Anglo” New Mexican (really more like (((Anglo))) ). New Mexico has been a proud tri-cultural mecca for centuries; and everyone gets along remarkably well.

        Dipshit white wanna-be socialists from the East Coast (no offense to East Glibs) start throwing out utterly ignorant opinions about the “social injustices” (or whatever the fuck ever) about NM and I want to smash their pig-ignorant faces in.

      • R C Dean

        You are making the mistake of thinking this is about anything than an exercise of power and forcing others to bend to their will.

    • Q Continuum

      Your tax dollars at work.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        First thing we do is kill all the lawyers diversity administrators

    • Grosspatzer

      “Other heavenly bodies”.

      We’ll need new titles for the daily galleries of Boobus Giganticus. Q hardest hit?

      • Q Continuum

        Object B-00-BSR-GR8.

    • cyto

      I randomly watched that about 6 months back, thinking I might get the kids to build a simple dobsonian from a kit.

      They had no enthusiasm for the project. Fortnite was much more interesting.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        it looks exhausting to me, and I’m actually interested. “Oh, just keep going for 9 hours until you get the focal length right”

        I wonder if it’s 3D printable. They’re just putting a mirror finish on a very well measured concave surface.

      • Not an Economist

        Moving the glass around is easy. Grinding is actually not all that long and you don’t have to do it in one sitting. Start with a coarse grit and use finer and finer grit until the smoothness and curve fit what your looking for. Polishing is a little hit and miss from what I understand (I’ve only done grinding).

        I wonder if it’s 3D printable. They’re just putting a mirror finish on a very well measured concave surface.

        It is far more than just a mirror finish. If you want a decent image the surface has to be very smooth and in the proper shape. I’ve heard if the Mount Palomar 200 inch mirror was the size of the US, the largest hill would be six inches high. That is a very good mirror but that sort of smoothness is what you should try for if you are grinding a telescope.

      • The Hyperbole

        yeah, nine hours grinding I’m thinking I’ll just buy a pre-ground mirror.

      • The Hyperbole

        Also thanks for posting this I was dangerously close to accomplishing something today and a 90 min youtube binge took me right up to beer thirty and I have successfully not done shit all day. ?

    • Not an Economist

      I met him years ago I think. He came to an astronomy convention I went to.

      A little bit different but he did a lot in his long life.

    • Ozymandias

      That video format is pretty funny. Makes it feel much more “real” in that newsy way. I had a pretty good chuckle at that one.
      The guys on my hockey team were joking about Biden last night in the locker room. I forget how it came up, but someone’s relative’s dementia may have been the start of it. Everyone was like, “that guy’s family must hate him.”
      “This is elder abuse” was also a common refrain.

  17. Rhywun

    Humor you can’t do anymore:

    On Hogan’s Heroes, Kinchloe (the black guy) is pretending to be French in advance of some upcoming scheme. Schultz walks by and says, “Zese Frenchmen, you can’t tell zem apart!”

    • Q Continuum

      I sincerely hope there is some kind of backlash building…

      it’s all that keeps me going.

      • Nephilium

        it’s all that keeps me going.

        So that and tits?

        (I tried to find the Archer bit about the hatred is all that keeps me going, but couldn’t).

      • Rhywun

        Never really watched that show until lately. I think it’s DVD-worthy, after the show is done and the price goes down.

        Also, Parks and Rec. One or two others.

        /too much TV this year

      • Q Continuum

        Northern Exposure.

        Greatest show ever.

      • Rhywun

        To each his own 🙂

        I guess I liked it but not that much.

      • UnCivilServant

        I’d forgotten it existed.

      • Viking1865

        The first few seasons of Archer are very good. I kind of lost track, apparently they’re starting Season 11.

      • Rhywun

        I haven’t watched enough to notice the story arcs (apparently there are a lot of them) but I’ve liked each individual episode that I’ve seen. And the writing is often hilarious.

        I read the new season will be “back to basics” – no more time traveling or whatever the fuck is going on.

      • Nephilium

        The last three seasons have all been set in alternate worlds (Noir, Pulp Island, Sci-Fi), with a frame story about Archer being in a coma. The several seasons before that were also separate things (Archer Vice, working for the CIA, PI’s in California). They decided to get rid of ISIS right when some assholes in some shithole started using the same name.

      • Rhywun

        Yeah, I’ve seen several of those alternate worlds in just the last week or two. Vice, Dreamland, and Danger Island.

      • Rhywun

        Venture Bros. is another one I’m waiting for production to end.

      • UnCivilServant

        I thought it did end a decade or so ago.

      • Rhywun

        Nope. They put out a new season every two or three years. Apparently another one is coming.

  18. UnCivilServant

    🙁 I need to figure out what the spirit world looks like to a visitor. It’s the point where the next most complete Kord the younger Story is stuck.

    Though I should probably just work on Prince of the North Tower. It has no real blockers, and I know what the rest of the story is supposed to be.

    • Q Continuum

      I like the idea that it’s different for everyone depending on the visitor. If someone’s idea of it is a pit of despair, they’ll see a pit of despair. If it’s the Gross Pointe Country Club’s 19th hole, that’s what it’ll be.

      • UnCivilServant

        So far I haven’t established anything concrete about it in the stories, so that’s an option.

        Though gold doesn’t appear to exist in this setting.

      • UnCivilServant

        *golf

        Gold is clearly established in the setting.

  19. Semi-Spartan Dad

    Today has been a good day.

    I went to my FFL to pick up my new semi-auto 12 gauge and saw zero employees and zero customers wearing masks. It was a breathe of fresh air to see some sanity still remains in the world.

    Then, while going through the safe to make room, I found a whole case (175 rounds) of 00 buck that I had apparently bought years ago and completely forgot about .

    • Q Continuum

      What brand? I’ve got a Stoeger M3000 tactical on the way; can’t wait to get it.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        RIA VR80. Already grabbed some 9 rd mags and am on the lookout for a couple 19 rounders.

      • Q Continuum

        Nice…

        Expecting a range report.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        Nice. I kept my eyes out for a Stoeger too. Everything is ridiculously hard to find.

    • Rebel Scum

      I finally ordered a lower build kit for my PSA VA-15 lower. Gonna take the upper off my other one (salvaged from the boating accident, of course) to put on it (which will subsequently be lost in another boating accident…). I was surprised they still had any. The PSA website should read “Out of Stock” on the top of the home page right now.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        Awesome. I’m thinking the days might be counting down on us VAers for getting lowers.

      • Viking1865

        Watch Republicans take back the Assembly in 2021, followed by a federal judge declaring the districts are in violation of the Civil Rights Act, and that a nonpartisan committee of expert political scientists from Oberlin, Evergreen State College, and Bryn Mawr will be drawing new, scrupulously fair districts.

      • westernsloper

        I waited three months for an AR9 80% awhile back. My kingdom for a CNC machine.

    • R C Dean

      I’m still waiting for parts and accessories for the Benelli 1301 to trickle in. Effing everything is back ordered. I can’t get my side saddle shell holder and RMR sight mount until the new stock goes on, even.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        It’s frustrating. I don’t know how many email lists I’m on to be notified when accessories become available. Got the very last Magpul MOE pistol grip I could find in stock anywhere.

    • Brochettaward

      Would not.

    • Rebel Scum

      I guess it’s never too late to get fit.

  20. DEG

    I say its a draw, at best.

    I agree, but I’ll take it.

    Is there a gofundme for the legal fees? I might have asked already but I can’t remember. If there is, I’ll donate.

    The lass in the picture for this article on the site’s front page: Would.

  21. Raven Nation

    Hah! BBC Football’s online text commentary is home-town to the max…score spoiler coming.

    Bayern led Chelsea 3-0 after the first leg in Germany. Bayern scores twice in the first half to make it 5-0 then Chelsea right before half-time.

    BBC: “The faintest glimmer of hope for the visitors just before half time.”

    • Rhywun

      Lewandowski needs to join Messi in some other occupation in order to give the rest of the world a fighting chance. I don’t even bother watching either team because the outcome is almost always a foregone conclusion.

      That said, fuck Chelsea.

      • Ted S.

        You’ll be to see Lewandowski scored *again*. 🙂

      • Ted S.

        You’ll be happy, that is. There’s some odd lag when I try to comment here on my smartphone.

    • Rhywun

      Napoli sucked so bad this year I forgot they were still in the Champion’s League. It almost doesn’t seem fair to put them through this.

    • Urthona

      They lead Chelsea 2-1 actually, and Chelsea scored a goal right before half.

      • Raven Nation

        I was referring to aggregate score.

  22. westernsloper

    My Picadillo is vastly improved by moar meat. Now I need a nap.

  23. Grummun

    On topic: The local grocery has gone from 90% IPAs to 40% IPAs and 50% Hazy IPAs. Apparently what makes them hazy is citrus rind and pine sap. Not a fan. I can’t wait for winter and maybe some decent stouts.

    Off topic: I’ve been watching some Stanley Cup “playoffs”. After the first few games with the only noise being the players on the ice yelling at each other (and the talking heads discussing how the lack of fan noise was affecting play), now the telecast is adding a laugh track fake fan noise, complete with oohs and ahs for hits and missed shots, and cheering for goals. It’s … somewhere between insulting and annoying.

    • Nephilium

      Hazy IPA’s are made with flaked oats, large amounts of dry hopping, and some believe a process called bioconversion. Some do also use fruit puree and lactose to sweeten them up (hence Milkshake IPA).

      • Urthona

        I would assume they also have some of the yeast sediment in there naturally common to beer.

      • Nephilium

        They do, and the ones that are really poorly made also will have hop particulate matter in them.

    • Rhywun

      Soccer has been doing that for a couple months. It’s fucking r-word. I *hate* it. In the Bundesliga it was up to the stadium so lots of matches didn’t have it, but most other leagues it’s the network adding it and you have watch it online to avoid the fakery.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Watched a couple minutes of NBA. Awful. Turned the channel.

    • DEG

      I don’t like sports. I’ve seen a few games on bar TVs.

      I think the lack of fans and the cardboard cutouts used at some games are fucking sad.

      • Rhywun

        Why do you hate the new normal?

      • DEG

        Fuck the new normal.

  24. DEG

    Who could have seen this coming?

    Reports of suicidal or self-harming thoughts made to Pennsylvania’s mandatory harm reporting system for schools increased after classrooms were shut down in March because of the coronavirus pandemic.

    The Pennsylvania attorney general’s office released an annual report showing tips to the Safe2Say Something program had dropped since the pandemic sent students home for remote learning, The Pittsburgh Tribune-Review reported Friday. But an increased portion of the calls, online tips and other reports that did come in were for issues of suicidal thoughts or self-harm, data from the system showed.

    • The Hyperbole

      Meh, an increased number of fewer tips could mean anything.

  25. Grosspatzer

    https://www.nj.com/coronavirus/2020/08/most-nj-covid-19-patients-arent-giving-contact-tracers-the-information-they-need.html

    Gov. Phil Murphy said at his press briefing that between July 26 and Aug. 1, contact tracers were able to reach 63 percent of positive people they attempted to contact. But of those who did answer, 45 percent refused to provide any information about the people they could have potentially exposed to the virus.

    That means that only 35% of people who tested positive for the coronavirus have been providing information about their close contacts with contact tracers. The rest were either unreachable or uncooperative.

    Knuckleheads People don’t trust you, Phil. I wonder why.

    • TARDIS

      Is this the new big government job program? Good grief.

      • Grosspatzer

        Tax dollars at work.

    • Rhywun

      zOMG UNDERAGE HOUSE PARTIES!1!

      Good. There’s hope for humanity yet.

    • mrfamous

      The 2020 Asshole of the Year award is going to be the most competitive in history. More often than not, the frontrunner has distanced themselves from the pack by now, but this year the competition has been fierce and spirited. Despite going out to get a haircut when everyone else in her city was doing so, and then defending it by saying essentially that she was more important than most people, Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot has virtually no chance.

      • R C Dean

        So, who are the frontrunners?

      • mrfamous

        It’s hard to say. It depends if you grade more for severity of assholitude (Neil “2.2 Million Americans Dead” Ferguson) or consistent assholitude (Whitmer, Murphy, Fauci and that colossal prick from Australia Daniel Andrews) or do you go the tag team route and hand it to the Brothers Cuomo.

  26. Nephilium

    So… this just happened. Is there anything that can’t be done with an executive order anymore?

    Bypassing Congress, President Donald Trump on Saturday signed executive orders deferring payroll taxes for some Americans and extending unemployment benefits after negotiations on a new coronavirus rescue package collapsed.

    • Dr. Fronkensteen

      End the drug war, roll back socialism and redistribution programs, end the department of Education. Bring back the gold standard. Quite a few things actually.

    • Urthona

      It’s kinda horseshit that the president allegedly has these powers, although i’m all for giving the president the ability to unilaterally halt any tax. also any member of congress. and the janitor.

      • mrfamous

        Well, it appears Trump has a pen and a phone.

      • Dr. Fronkensteen

        But he’s ungoodthink. Therefore he shouldn’t have the same powers as the Lightbringer.

      • Rhywun

        Yes, and the author disapproves.

      • Plinker762

        According to the article, he traded in the phone for a podium.

      • Nephilium

        So… here’s some more details about what’s actually being done.

      • Rhywun

        That’s the same AP article.

      • Nephilium

        Cleveland.com only had a blurb up when I first linked it, only 5 paragraphs. Looks like someone updated it to the AP version, which means you miss the lovely gem that the payroll tax deferment wouldn’t help those on unemployment… which considering it’s applying to the employer’s portion…

    • Rhywun

      It’s amusing watching the MSM oppose the exact same policies which might have passed Congress.

    • kinnath

      For employees making under 104K. fuck’m

    • Dr. Fronkensteen

      Out of curiosity. Do the employees get to see the total amount taken out or do the companies still hide the amount they pay and keep that for themselves?

      • Nephilium

        It only shows what you pay to the government, it doesn’t show the employer match (and shocking very few people here, most people aren’t even aware of it).

  27. UnCivilServant

    For all the build-up and background work, the fight with the venom rats only lasted 593 words.

    I’m disappointed.

    • The Hyperbole

      Add more adverbs and adjectives – “The pig ugly, stupid, and clumsy venom rats were very very very pissed that Dug “thickbottom” Fitzmartin had spoiled their really nice diner.”

      • UnCivilServant

        Who?

        And why are rats running a diner?

      • The Hyperbole

        You named him, and one doesn’t have to run a diner to ruin it, see Flo and Vera.

      • UnCivilServant

        Well, first off, there’s no Fitzmartin anywhere in any of my stories.

        Secondly, the narrator of this book is Kord Grosz.

        thirdly, your example is awful.

      • The Hyperbole

        Flo and Vera most certainly ruined Mel’s Diner. One was a cantankerous bitch that apart from shagging every truck driver that happened to stop by most likely drove off any regular customers with her attitude, and Vera was a train wreck of a waitress fucking up every order and then playing dumb to cover up her ineptitude.

      • UnCivilServant

        I don’t know that reference, I was walking about your original example where you intentionally wrote godawful prose.

      • l0b0t

        Yeah, but Linda Lavin is a total would!

      • The Hyperbole

        Dude she’s 82 years old.

      • Rhywun

        Kiss my grits!