Joemala: Episode 20

by | Apr 7, 2021 | Joemala, SugarFree | 187 comments

 

Joe looks down and he sees his feet in sandals, not the hairless pale feet of an old man but feet ready to run up a thousand flights of airline stairs. He breathes in and his chest doesn’t hurt, his heart doesn’t race, his throat is not ragged and sore. Joe smiles. The sky is blue, the sun is bright, and the Trans-Am in front of him is black and wet. He holds a hose spraying water. His hands are strong and steady and do not hurt. “JILL!” he calls without making a sound, “JILL!” He closes his thumb over the end of the hose and sprays water into the air; rainbows appear, wavering in and out of existence. “JILL! COME SEE THIS!” he calls. “Jill?” The sunlight dims and he thinks Run! In his frightened bunny brain. Joe squints at the sky. A black cloud is sliding across the sun. “Jill?” he asks again, in a small, quiet voice.

 

 

A ticking metronome. “The sky has gone out, the sky has gone out,” weeps the girl in the saffron robes. Joe is rocking back and forth. He sees Delaware rushing past his window. A negro waiter looms over him. “A drink, sir?” he rumbles in a basso profundo voice. Joe cannot speak but the waiter nods to acknowledge his order, stands to his full height, and walks out of the train car. Joe rises from his seat and looks back. All the seats are empty. There is no luggage in the overhead bins. Joe stands, the swaying of the train throwing him back and forth as he walks down the aisle. He opens the door to the lavatory. It smells like shit and peppermints. He unzips his pants to urinate but cannot find his penis or even his testicles. He looks in the filthy metal bathroom mirror. His mouth is dripping with blood and his dentures are missing. He begins to cry. He is back in his seat with no transition. The waiter looms over him again, offering a tiny can of pre-mixed Margarita. Enormous brown fingers open the can for him. The can looks no bigger than a thimble. Joe screams soundlessly.

 

 

Joe strides across the Senate floor, flashbulbs blinding. He smiles his famous smile and gives his famous wave. The applause is like cannon fire. Their voices chant “JOE! JOE! JOE!” Undulating waves of pleasure lap against his thighs and groin. “JOE! JOE! JOE!” The Democrats are standing. The Republicans are standing. The grizzled gnome Bernie Sanders has been stood up. Jill is beside him. A ghostly Beau beams rays of light from his smile. Hunter–bathed and sober–walks with the family, a grinning stripper baby in each arm. “JOE!” the chant thunders. “JOE!” the crowd screams. He seats his adoring family of the living and the dead and walks slowly up the steps to the podium, waving, pointing, grinning, laughing. Time slows, thick like honey, a dream, a dream. Joe looks up, his head a million million pounds to lift. Kamala is waiting.

 

About The Author

SugarFree

SugarFree

SugarFree hates author bios.

187 Comments

  1. The Other Kevin

    This is frightening. Especially the part about Joe Biden being in Project Treadstone.

    You are always keeping us on our toes, SF. Nice job.

  2. Ownbestenemy

    Dark and brooding, how I like my women.

    • Bobarian LMD

      Bitter and mentally unstable?

      • WTF

        That’s a bit how I feel after reading SugarFree.
        But it eventually goes away. Usually. So far.
        Oh crap…

  3. CPRM

    The reincarnation of Ingmar Bergman!

    • Tonio

      “Wild Strawberries,” right?

  4. juris imprudent

    Jeez, you can’t even count on an appetite deterrent on Wednesdays anymore. I sense this is just lulling us into complacency, and then when we let our guards down, we’ll be subjected to the full gaze of the Elder Gods.

    • Ask your doctor if BEAM is right for you

      Let’s be honest, we’ve always deserved their gaze.

      • juris imprudent

        His is narrowed to spare us the total loss of our sanity.

      • CPRM

        And he won’t stop talking long enough to let us say otherwise.

      • Ownbestenemy

        heh…nice

  5. Tonio

    There is so much sadness in the first paragraph.

    • Tundra

      Yeah, Trans Ams are overrated.

      • Tulip

        I miss my trans am.

      • mikey

        Saw a Trans Am in Boston once.
        It was painted brght, shocking pink. The East Boston chick driving it had big hair and lipstick and nails to match the car.
        Could that have been you?

      • Tulip

        Mine was red.

      • pistoffnick

        *imagines Tulip with ’80’s “Big Hair”, nails matching matching the red paint of the car, t-tops stowed, radio blasting Tears for Fears*

      • R C Dean

        + 1 tube top.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        What? Really? Damn, Tundra. I thought you were cool.

      • Tundra

        Just trying to stimulate some discussion.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Now had you said IROC-Z are overrated…I’d agree.

      • Tundra

        Oh man, they were such pieces of shit. But 19 year old me wanted one. Badly.

      • The Other Kevin

        Mine was an ’88 Firebird, black with gray and orange stripes, same body style as Knight Rider. I’d buy another one in a minute if I had the money.

  6. Not Adahn

    a grinning stripper baby in each arm.

    That’s how you know you’re successful.

    • Bobarian LMD

      The real measure of success is the number of stripper moms.

  7. The Late P Brooks

    How did I get into this graveyard?

    *whistles an unconvincingly cheerful tune*

  8. rhywun

    Almost makes me feel sorry for the old bastard. ?

    • Certified Public Asshat

      We need to stop saying this. Never feel a drop of sorrow for him.

      • Tundra

        Yeah, I’ve managed to get over that emotion. He’s a blood-soaked monster who deserves whatever hell is concocted for him.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        Agreed.

        He could have ended his grifting career, getting the usual scorn all pols should rightfully get (which can include some form of praise or clemency or whatever you want to call it), but instead he chose to be Captain Pudding Cup while subjecting all of us to the absolute worst statest impulses imaginable short of full blown mass graves.

        Fuck him.

      • The Other Kevin

        He spent his entire adult life living off taxpayer money and enjoying a more privileged life than any of us will ever see. He was as close to royalty as we have here. I don’t feel sorry for him either.

  9. Tundra

    A ghostly Beau beams rays of light from his smile.

    Sublime.

    • Lachowsky

      Too bad old Joe pushed the war that got his good son killed.

  10. Lord Humungus

    My old man is a year older than Joe; dad has all of his senses, moreso than Biden, but sheesh he can tell a long meandering story now.

    He used to be a “get to the point” kind of guy but now he can roll on and on about some old business story from 1975 and gas prices.

    I can’t imagine what Joe does – or more like doesn’t do all day. I fear – and maybe this is a good thing? – this is closer to an Edith Wilson presidency.

    • Muzzled Woodchipper

      It’s quite literally a case of the insane running the asylum.

    • Ted S.

      Does your dad wear an onion on his belt, as was the style at the time?

  11. Tundra

    I love the internet.

    Scarface

    • Plinker762

      First you get the cheese and then you get the women.

  12. Heroic Mulatto

    So no one is going to comment on the SugarFree “Felt cute; might delete” face reveal?

    • DEG

      For the record, I didn’t read the comments before posting. If I had, I would have posted the Ultima reference here.

      • Heroic Mulatto

        It’s uncanny.

    • SugarFree

      I always feel cute.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Is that SF’s YouTube channel? The other videos are… interesting.

  13. The Late P Brooks

    Stop politicizing everything, you granny-killers!

    Growing conservative backlash to the idea of “vaccine passports” — proposed by some private-sector industries to promote a safer environment as states begin to ease coronavirus restrictions — could make Republicans even less likely to get their shots, experts warned.

    Last month, multiple polls found that about half of Republicans or those who identified as having voted for former President Donald Trump either want to wait and see before getting vaccinated or say they will never get the shots. So-called vaccine hesitancy among Republicans could stand in the way of the U.S.’s ultimately achieving herd immunity, which scientists estimate will be reached when 70 percent to 85 percent of the population has Covid-19 antibodies.

    “The idea of a vaccine passport has become politicized quickly, making it a wedge separating people rather than a bridge to our goal of increasing vaccination,” said epidemiologist Brian Castrucci, president and CEO of the de Beaumont Foundation, which has partnered with a longtime Republican pollster to study and create pro-vaccination messaging aimed at conservatives.

    We just want to make the world a safer, happier place, you detestable anti-SCIENCE monsters. Why must you destroy society with your depraved indifference to our feelings?

    • Gustave Lytton

      to study and create pro-vaccination messaging aimed at conservatives

      Retards trying to stoke up a conspiracy couldn’t do a better job if they intentionally tried.

    • rhywun

      That Polack priest in Canada is right. The commies are taking over.

    • Sean

      Herd immunity with a vaccine that still lets you get Covid.

      Got it.

    • Lord Humungus

      >>when 70 percent to 85 percent of the population has Covid-19 antibodies.

      which could have happened without the lockdowns? Or would happen anyways with the passage of time.

    • Nephilium

      So there will be no herd immunity without following the herd? It checks out.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Well remember according to the WHO, which redefined herd immunity to only be achieved via vaccine, this checks out.

      • SugarFree

        The same agency that redefined a “case” to be two positives test and symptoms the day of Biden’s Inaugural.

      • Nephilium

        Well those are both common sense changes.

        Why is faith in public organizations continuing to fall? It just doesn’t make sense.

      • Ownbestenemy

        What you don’t like living hour to hour on what your current restrictions are? They are operating like a military boot camp where no matter what you do, it is wrong because they say so.

      • Nephilium

        I’m seeing some bright notes here at least. The park systems have restrooms open again, the vast majority of people I’ve seen biking/hiking/jogging/etc. have been maskless, and the idiotic “closing” of the fitness trails through the parks is over.

        I’m hearing more bitching about the restrictions when I’m out and about, and more people treating them as idiotic totems rather then any real defensive measure.

        Of course, that’s also self selected from people who are going out and aren’t cowering in fear, while locked away from the rest of the world.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Parents like that inadvertently raise libertarians. “Careful, Icarus.”

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        (Er, and later in life so can an arbitrary government.)

    • trshmnstr the terrible

      Just a friendly reminder that they’ve been trying to enact “behavior modification” on this topic since last summer.

    • Rebel Scum

      to promote a safer environment

      That is not what it is for.

      or those who identified as having voted for former President Donald Trump

      I don’t get the reason for the reference. Is this a new gender?

      when 70 percent to 85 percent of the population has Covid-19 antibodies.

      Moving goalpost has been moved. And you only have antibodies temporarily (I think…)

      create pro-vaccination messaging aimed at conservatives

      Because these science deniers need to be propagandized into submission.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        I don’t get the reason for the reference.

        They’ve picked up on the chilling effect of their insanity and are fully aware that there is a large subset of Trump voters who would never admit to it in mixed company.

      • Ownbestenemy

        I am not scientist or doctor but you have the antibodies for a brief period but the blueprint is imprinted in your immune response.

      • Gadfly

        or those who identified as having voted for former President Donald Trump

        I don’t get the reason for the reference. Is this a new gender?

        “Republicans or Trump voters” because a small fraction of Republicans did not vote for Trump while a large portion of independents did.

    • Akira

      The idea of a vaccine passport has become politicized quickly

      Translation: “Waaah, people are questioning and opposing what I want to do instead of blindly obeying me!!”

      • R C Dean

        I bet the same people complaining about the COVID response “becoming politicized” also say “the personal is political” without the slightest hint of cognitive dissonance.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Don’t be silly. Asking governments to solve a problem for you doesn’t instantly make something political.

    • R C Dean

      So-called vaccine hesitancy among Republicans could stand in the way of the U.S.’s ultimately achieving herd immunity

      Bullshit. You can get to herd immunity with zero vaccines. Vaccines just make it faster.

      Oh, and it used to be 70%. The 85% is from Fauci, who admitted he just made it up.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Anyone past 4th grade knows that…but we have to fill those coffers of Pharma somehow to pay back them keeping the fear alive for so long. /conspiracy out!

      • Sean

        Annual Covid booster shots, coming soon to a mandatory clinic near you.

  14. The Late P Brooks

    I miss my trans am.

    ?!!

    • EvilSheldon

      This is real?

      *reaches for the bleach* Am comin, Harambe!

  15. The Late P Brooks

    A.J. Bauer, an assistant professor of journalism and creative media at the University of Alabama who studies the conservative media ecosystem, said the passport debate is the latest instance of “applying culture war logic to the slow process of getting back to normal from Covid” by influential figures on the right.

    SIUYA, bub.

    • CPRM

      professor of journalism and creative media at the University of Alabama who studies the conservative media ecosystem

      Talk about ‘Conservatives in the Mist’, fer fuck sake.

    • WTF

      How about just not using what is essentially a nasty flu virus to justify tracking and controlling citizens to an extent the Stasi could only dream of, you condescending, smug, fuckstick.

    • Plisade

      “slow process of getting back to normal ”

      It’s as if these people don’t know a significant portion of the country is already / has been back to or never left normal and are faring better than the blue bubbles. I frequently get visitors from Denver who have no idea there are places living normally like here in much of Tennessee. They are truly bewildered just going into a restaurant with no restrictions. But they like it.

    • Ted S.

      I also love the implied assertion that there was no culture war until the conservatives started bringing this stuff up.

    • Plisade

      I thought it was Marlon Brando from Apocalypse Now with a voice over.

      • DEG

        Oh… that would work too.

        Ultima was the first thing I thought of.

  16. Rebel Scum

    Idk what is going on here.

    • Heroic Mulatto

      The key is in the last phrase of the video.

      • Plisade

        Hmmm, I can’t understand what he’s saying. Maybe that’s the point…

      • Heroic Mulatto

        “9/11”

      • Plisade

        Gracias.

  17. grrizzly

    Two headlines in the Boston Globe. Side by side.

    EU drug regulator finds ‘possible link’ between AstraZeneca COVID-19 vaccine and blood clots

    Why COVID-19 conspiracy theories persist

  18. Sean

    Can we start bidding on the NFT for this story?

  19. bacon-magic

    O.o
    0

    • Plisade

      Odds on if any of those EOs would have prevented any of the mentioned “mass” shootings?

      • Ownbestenemy

        Biden will direct the administration to begin the process of requiring buyers of so-called ghost guns — homemade or makeshift firearms that lack serial numbers — to undergo background checks

        Eight-ball says NOT A CHANCE

      • SugarFree

        Requiring buyers of so-called ghost guns to undergo background checks

        concealed assault-style firearms

        prohibitions on firearm purchases for those convicted of domestic violence

        federal guidance on home storage safety measures

        None of these scenarios were a part of the recent shootings.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Nu-uh….right in the that article Politico states that a ‘…concealed assault-style firearms, which is similar to the one used in the Colorado shooting…” It is right there in print, it must be true!

      • Sean

        concealed assault-style firearms

        This is their new term for AR pistols. Which the one guy allegedly used.

        Ar pistols are not fucking concealable.

      • SugarFree

        Ah, I missed a talking point memo. Disingenuous fucksores.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Nah, you can conceal an AR pistol in a trenchcoat.

      • EvilSheldon

        You might be able to hide an AR pistol under a coat or large jacket, for a short time, as long as no one is looking at you closely. That, to my mind, is not the same thing as being ‘concealable’.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        as long as no one is looking at you closely

        Hey! Who you lookin at?

      • The Other Kevin

        That’s not what they’re talking about. They’re talking about the fully automatic AR-15 Uzi that holds 50 rounds and can fit in a pocket and can spray 1500 bullets per minute.

      • Nephilium

        Each bullet capable of exploding a watermelon!

      • Plisade

        “concealed assault-style firearms”

        I was thinking of doing a submission of my building a concealed carry backpack for my carbine. Guess I’ll keep that evidence to myself.

      • Plisade

        I’ve got one similar to that for the stock barrel. But I put a 3.5″ barrel on it and telescoping stock. It now fits in a normal school back pack.

      • Sean

        I dunno if you’ve got a stamp on that, but taking your posts at face value, you might want to be careful…

      • Plisade

        It’s legal.

      • Sean

        It’s legal.

        OK.

        And hot.

      • Heroic Mulatto

        Seconded.

      • Urthona

        It’s pretty predictable how the first two items will play out:

        thousands of additional black people in jail.

        Duh.

        How do minorities keep voting for this shitty party?

      • Ownbestenemy

        “thousands of additional black people in jail.” Kamala’s ears perk up while she stifles a cackle-attack.

      • Urthona

        Haha. Yeah. Yup.

        Yet another attack on rural and suburban white people that will land squarely on minorities.

        Democratic voters generally believe the myth of the “violent redneck” that doesn’t reflect reality.

        These white counties have about zero murders a year. The people never even interact with cops. At all. They won’t get harassed or searched or anything. Nothing will happen to them.

        What will happen those is some minorities in urban areas that are constantly having run-ins with the police will be found to have guns that don’t comply with these new federal rules. Because — unlike rural whites — they are constantly dealing with cops.

        This shit happens every fucking time.

      • Gadfly

        How do minorities keep voting for this shitty party?

        Every group has members that the rest of the group hates. IIRC a lot of the tough on crime anti-drug measures were either requested by or at least approved of by the “community leaders” of the cities that inevitably bore the greatest incarceration cost of the WOD.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Does it matter? Gun control has nothing to do with preventing crime and everything to do with disarming the general populace.

    • rhywun

      I wonder why we haven’t tried banning guns before. I mean, it’s just common sense.

    • EvilSheldon

      Meh. This looks like a bunch of limp-dicked handwaving.

      • Sean

        I’ll keep my “meh” until I see what sort of malarky they come up with.

      • EvilSheldon

        I mean, fair enough, but the Executive doesn’t even have the ability (to say nothing of the authority) to do anything particularly noxious.

      • R C Dean

        Really? Are you including the BATFE, FBI, and DOJ in “the Executive”?

        Because they can take an EO and start kicking down doors and filing charges pronto, and if the courts ever get around to overruling it years from now, a lot of damage can be done.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        Especially after a federal circuit court ruling that states the executive branch cannot make up the rules that they are supposed to enforce (in regards to bump stocks).

        They can’t just make something illegal. That’s up to Congress.

    • Gadfly

      I’m hoping that, after the governors coming out banning vaccine passports, at least one will have the gumption to ban implementation of this EO. Hoping, but I wouldn’t bet on it.

      • DEG

        There is a bill working through the NH legislature to do just that.

  20. mexican sharpshooter

    That was disturbing.

  21. The Late P Brooks

    I wonder why we haven’t tried banning guns before. I mean, it’s just common sense.

    I dream of a land in which it is ILLEGAL to murder random strangers. A glorious future awaits, if only our politicians could muster the will to act.

    • rhywun

      Do better, Congress.

    • Gustave Lytton

      There’s nothing federal law against murder!

      *except for a growing number of special circumstances

  22. The Late P Brooks

    Headline:

    Biden to unveil long-awaited executive action on guns

    Long-awaited?

    Now, correct me if I’m wrong, but hasn’t he only been President for a couple of months?

    • Ownbestenemy

      They harp on that in the article that he has acted ‘too slow’ on the issue

      • R C Dean

        His hand was probably still cramped from signing dozens of EOs since being inaugurated.

        President Dean’s very first act as President, probably at the podium immediately after being inaugurated, would be to sign an EO revoking all previous EOs.

      • Ownbestenemy

        That would initiate the FYTW clause that all federal judges rely upon on determining if revoking an executive action can be done by a sitting president.

      • R C Dean

        I doubt the judiciary will be very excited about my second act as President . . . .

      • Gadfly

        Firing all the bureaucrats who are redundant as they only perform unconstitutional tasks?

      • R C Dean

        I was thinking, telling the FBI and DOJ nobody gets a promotion without bringing me the scalp of a federal or state legislator, judge, or appointed official. Figuratively, of course. Real scalps are disgusting.

      • banginglc1

        If I were president (long live the veto party) I would refuse to enforce anything I thought was unconstitutional. That’s part of my oath. And it’s not the judiciary that can make my conscience or mind determine that, it’s what I believe after evaluation of each and every law and agency. Hence, I would not enforce the majority of laws and I would not allow any agencies to operate that were contrary to that. If congress thinks I am interpreting the constitution wrong, it is their job to impeach me. I bet I wouldn’t last a day.

  23. The Late P Brooks

    I just got one of these for the combat shotgun and the battle rifle. They’ve got so much tacticool crap hanging off them now none of my Fudd cases fit any more. This outfit makes a number of variations.

    “FRAGILE- MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS”

  24. Hank

    “America’s founding fathers got a reprieve Tuesday in San Francisco, when the city’s scandal-plagued school board formally suspended a plan to rename 44 schools as part of a racial reckoning that critics said went too far….

    “Tuesday’s 6-0 decision means the school board is rescinding its vote from January and will revisit the matter after all students have returned full time to in-person learning. It sets no specific timetable.”

    https://www.desmoinesregister.com/story/news/education/2021/04/07/san-francisco-board-education-suspends-plan-rename-44-schools/7125151002/

  25. The Late P Brooks

    They harp on that in the article that he has acted ‘too slow’ on the issue

    What was I thinking?

    I forgot; five minutes is an eternity to a two year old.

    • juris imprudent

      And that two year old is a paragon of patience compared to the mindless twits of the left, buzzing around like fruit flys on meth.

  26. DEG

    I’m watching the NH House’s livestream. They’re debating and voting on amendments on the budget bill HB 2.

    The Speaker just interrupted someone giving a speech to reprimand a few representatives in the corner of the room who were playing catch.

    Heh.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Remember our capitols are sacred places where only serious thought and debate take place. Wonder how many fuck-rooms each states’ capitols have…

      • Ask your doctor if BEAM is right for you

        That’s what the “no-tell motels” down the street from the capitol buildings are for.

  27. Sean

    Random: I was google street viewing an area we had workers in today. I walked a couple blocks away and found this.

    Abandoned buildings refurbed to look “normal”. Which led me to wonder who does that? And then I found out it’s these people.

    • Ownbestenemy

      About the truest display of lipstick on a pig as there ever was.

    • pistoffnick

      “Omar comin’!”

  28. Ownbestenemy

    Which AZ glib was this

    Also, just let the guy go about his business. If he isn’t hacking up a lung or sneezing all over the place, he isn’t transmitting anything (at least, from my common-sense view of how respiratory viruses and human biology work)

    • mrfamous

      I have stopped wearing my mask except at my parents assisted living facility. I have yet to be stopped by an employee, but then I don’t shop at Trader Joe’s. Didn’t before, will continue not to.

      Gallego is in the midst of a pissing contest with Ducey over this because she’s not getting what she wants. Lord I hate politicians.

    • R C Dean

      “This is a free country. I’ll cough if I feel like it.”

      *insert Sean’s avatar here*

    • Sean

      Our last visit to TJ’s, a couple weeks ago the door head counter was gone. No more lines. New signage up barring customers from recording inside the store.

  29. Unreconstructed

    Found a local restaurant yesterday that actually insists its customers wear masks. Turns out I really didn’t want Chinese food that badly…

    • Nephilium

      I’ve got a list of the local breweries that I’ve decided really didn’t want my money. The worst offender is the one that announced they would be doing temperature checks on guests on St. Patrick’s Day. I’ve got plenty of other options.

      • Unreconstructed

        Exactly. When the woman behind the counter said “we require…” and started turning around to look for a mask for me, I said “I’ll just go somewhere else”, and did. Had a yummy bowl of pho a few yards away.

      • R C Dean

        “Nazi Vienna Lager. You’ll be goose-stepping back for more!”

      • Nephilium

        This brewery is also one that releases a Hanukkah beer instead of a Christmas beer, you would think they would know better.

        I’ve also been shifting support to the places that have sued the state over the restrictions and the like. At some point, I’ll probably get back to the breweries that required masks before the mandate… at some point. The one that temporarily re-closed and blamed people being too rowdy on the other hand…

      • Ownbestenemy

        It is funny. In the casinos (at least the ones that I have been to in the past 6 months) you only need to ‘affirm you have normal temperature, blah blah” but once inside and if you go to an eatery or shop, they take your temperature. SCIENCE!

      • Nephilium

        The spin studio I go to just asks, “You good with your three questions?” It’s even more of a joke then the three questions they used to ask at the airports.

        Viva has put together a page they’ll update as it gets closer to the event and as restrictions change (last update March 11th).

      • R C Dean

        That does sound like fun. I do bristle at this item in their Code of Conduct, though:

        Viva attendees do not wear or show any symbols that appear on the FBI hate symbol list which includes the confederate flag.

      • Ownbestenemy

        That is generally in Vegas though. The strip (though this is off strip) will boot anyone wearing colors, etc. In the past, it has kept shit like Hell’s Angels from going at it with the Vagos.

        Also…where can I find this FBI list….or do they mean the ADL or SPLC lists…

      • Gender Traitor

        Yesterday, for the first time since they reopened after their panicdemic shutdown, no one at the YMCA took my temp when I arrived.

  30. SP

    I’ll be hosting a Midweek Glib Happy Hour/Chat/Zoom/BitchFest starting at 1900 GlibTime (2000 Eastern, 1800 Mountain, 1700 AZ and Pacific).

    I need to be out this afternoon, so I’d appreciate it if someone would repost the link in the Afternoon Links. Which seems only appropriate.

    See you later, kids!

    • Swiss Servator

      I will skip – I yield the balance of my time to CPRM, poor dear doesn’t get enough mike time!

  31. Ownbestenemy

    If you feel like scrapping your eye balls out watching Joe Biden chastise us…

    *EDIT FERRY PUZZLED*

    • Ownbestenemy

      Huh…link was eaten. No worries, it is bad, sad and funny to watch all in one. He tries these attempts at gravitas after he raises his voice to a point of yelling…and then goes into this hushed, barely discernible tone, trying to draw the listener in. He definitely cannot enunciate certain words and letter combos either.

  32. Hank

    I enjoyed it without knowing exactly what was going on. Like watching an attractive singer singing in a language I don’t know.

    Only, except the attractive singer, there’s a bizarre phantasmagoric narrative.

  33. The Late P Brooks

    Real scalps are disgusting.

    “You want ants? This is how you get ants.”

    • R C Dean

      Its more flies, really.

      Err, I’m told.

      *changes flystrip in office*

      • UnCivilServant

        You also catch scalps on flypaper.

        Ask me how I know.

        /tall person problems