THE TABERNACLE HAS ALL KNOWN AND RECORDED EPISODES OF JEOPARDY!

ZARDOZ SPEAKS TO YOU, HIS CHOSEN ONES. ZARDOZ IS AWARE A BRUTAL ACTOR KNOWN AS “SEAN CONNERY” HAS PERISHED. HE MAY HAVE HAD A STRONG RESEMBLANCE TO ZED, BUT ZED IS STILL LEADING THE BRUTAL EXTERMINATORS, AND COLLECTING GRAIN SLAVES FOR THE VORTEX. HE DID MENTION GOING TO SEE A MUSIC ACT CALLED “LOU REED” SOMETIME LATER TONIGHT. BUT ZED’S SOCIAL PLANS ARE NOT ZARDOZ’S CONCERN. ZARDOZ IS HERE TO INSTRUCT.

 

ZARDOZ WILL ONCE AGAIN PROVIDE BETTER ADVICE THAN ANY BRUTAL.

 

Q: My husband and I own a condo in a building with 22 units. Because of COVID, one of the HOA board members has posted signs stating “rules” throughout the building. The rules are typical for these trying times, but the number of signs is obsessive. Many of the residents dislike the signs, but my husband was the one who wrote a nasty letter to the HOA about how many are posted.

The board member who was responsible for posting the signs was a friend of mine. Her feelings were hurt, and she has made some snide remarks about the letter. A group of women meet weekly for happy hour, and she and I are both part of that group. I feel caught in the middle. My husband has had a hard time getting over being mad about the signs, and I know the HOA member is angry at him. I just want to go to happy hour and drink and gossip. Why can’t we all just get along?

A: ZARDOZ BELIEVES THAT YOUR HOA “FRIEND”… LET US REFER TO HER AS “KAREN” FOR PURPOSES OF THIS ADVICE … IS LUCKY SHE HASN’T BEEN CLEANSED BY THE OTHER CONDO OWNERS. IF YOUR HUSBAND WASN’T A WEAKLING, HE WOULD HAVE CLEANSED “KAREN” HIMSELF. AS IT IS APPARENT YOU WON’T STEP UP AND POISON “KAREN’S” DRINK AT HAPPY HOUR, ZARDOZ WILL SEND BRUTAL EXTERMINATORS TO HELP.

GOTCHA, KAREN!

ZARDOZ HAS SPOKEN.

Q: As we return to work, businesses and expanded health care are opening up after the pandemic shutdown. We all are pretty much required to wear masks anywhere we go these days.

I am a deaf person and rely on lip-reading for communication. Wearing a mask has shut out my contact with the hearing world as far as communication goes. I have been mistreated in more ways than one because masks do not allow me to lip read. When I’m not able to have a sign language interpreter with me, I bring a pen and pad everywhere I go to converse as best as I can.

I am a very patient person; however, people in the public sector are not being patient nor compassionate in helping us deaf individuals. Please understand, we are trying to communicate as best as we can. We simply ask the community to be patient and either lower your mask to respond, or write your response. Yelling through the mask is pointless.

A: ZARDOZ IS SHOCKED, SHOCKED TO FIND IMPATIENT AND INSENSITIVE PEOPLE IN THE PUBLIC SECTOR! SEND ZED THE COORDINATES OF THE PUBLIC SECTOR OFFICES THAT HAVE TROUBLED YOU – IT WILL BE GRAIN SLAVERY FOR THE LOT OF THEM!

WHERE IS YOUR SEIU REP NOW?

AS FOR YOUR YOUR PARTICULAR HEARING DIFFICULTY. IT IS POSSIBLE THE VORTEX HAS TECHNOLOGY TO HELP YOU. ASK ZED WHEN YOU SEE HIM ROUNDING UP THE DMV WORKERS.

ENSLAVE DMV, REPEAT, ENSLAVE DMV.

ZARDOZ HAS SPOKEN.