I don’t care.  Given they keep stealing our jokes, I am going to fact check a Babylon Bee article.

This is my review of New Belgium Fat Tire (I seriously haven’t review Fat Tire):

The claim:  Eating soap as a child leads to having a taste for IPA.

The facts:  IPA became popular with craft beer drinkers during the late 00’s early 10’s for reasons nobody really questioned.  Is it selling?  Yes?  Who cares, make some more right?    Extensive market research is available that suggests IPA is the most popular style of beer in an industry slowly losing market share to other fierce competitors.  So much so an 11.4% annual growth in sales of IPA is expected—a doubling of the total market share from 2018 through 2025.  This is not a beverage that is going away any time soon.

Furthermore, research is available from the CDC and other state-funded services that suggest children during the time in question prior to the surge IPA sales began poisoning themselves with hygienic, self-care products.  This is a constant public health concen because scores of small children and people with significant psychosis are constantly eating soap.  Unfortunately, there are no studies that link both available on PubMed.  Not even a retrospective review of ICD-10, or more appropriately for the timeframe in question, ICD-9 codes to even correlate the timeframes.

What can be identified, is a correlation between use of anti-bacterial soap and endocrine disruption.  This is caused by a common ingredient in anti-bacterial soap, called Triclosan.  It has been used in a variety of hygiene products for decades:

Triclosan is a chemical with antibacterial properties. For more than 30 years, it has been used in consumer products such as detergents, soaps, skin cleansers, deodorants, lotions, creams, toothpastes, and dishwashing liquids. Triclosan can be added to other materials, such as textiles, to make them resistant to bacterial growth.

How did Missouri handle lockdowns? They switched to whiskey.

This overuse of endocrine disrupting chemicals was only exasperated during the COVID-19 pandemic, where hygiene practices such as hand washing were encouraged by public health agencies worldwide.  Couple this with the increased incidence of attempted suicide during the pandemic, some of which was likely attempted by eating household cleaning products and the record alcohol sales during the pandemic, speaks to a growing concern for public health officials in the coming years.  It is possible endocrine disruptors in hand soap lead to a level of comfort with such hormone blocking chemicals found in popular alcoholic beverages, which also is a growing concern for public health officials.  None from this country, obviously.

The verdict:  Pinocchio’s pants are on fire! There is no causal relationship between eating soap and a taste for IPA.  There is a relationship between hand washing and endocrine disruption.  Babylon Bee needs to wash their mouth out with an all natural, Triclosan free soap, lest they give themselves man-boobs.

In nearly five years of writing this weekly feature, I have yet to review Fat Tire.  Nothing against it, just for some reason I guess I looked it over.  Its a fine example of a balanced American Amber Ale that was popular before IPA took over the market share and made other styles become an afterthought.  It was a simpler time—a better time.  Meh, what am I saying?  New Belgium Fat Tire:: 3.5/5