So what had happened was, I went on a cruise in March 2022. See part 1 here and Part B here.

Now let’s get to the nitty gritty, the actual cruise. We had lots of ports of call, so I’ll keep it brief and image-intensive.

Ft. Lauderdale

Not really worth mentioning, except for the beautiful beaches just to the north of the port. My dad and his wife stayed at the beautiful and family-friendly Lago Mar Beach Resort & Club. This is an old-school Florida membership resort club (but you can rent condos for vacations). There were a ton of kids, all of whom seemed to be having a great time. I stayed at the fleabag across the bridge.

Sea Days

One of the attractions of this cruise was there were two at-sea days right out of the gate. My dad enjoyed the blackjack tables (casino is open while at sea only!) while I explored the ship and found the most comfortable spot (answer: in the aft).

Prop wash with a Caribbean sunset.

Midships pool area. Not my scene.

Moonrise from my balcony.

St. Maarten

This Franco-Dutch island was the entire reason I came on this cruise. Coofy restrictions here were nil, and we hopped off the ship and into a taxi and headed to the Sunset Beach Bar Sxm for the haj of the AvGeek. My only complaint was that we had to be back at the ship at 3pm, which meant leaving the bar/beach at 2pm. All the heavy jets coming from Europe arrive starting about 4pm. So you see the problem.

At any rate, this was a bucket list/dream come true. It was everything I’d hoped for in a day at the beach – airplanes and plenty of shade.

Definition of WOOHOO

Island hopper

Dad gets in on the action

End of runway 10, SXM

St. Lucia

Home of The Pitons (the opposite gender of The Tetons) and unexpected planespotting. We didn’t g et off the ship here, and I just enjoyed the airport views from my balcony and the various port side decks.


Balcony bloody mary with the airport in the background.
Dinner at Asian fusion restaurant Tamarind. Fucking delicious.

Barbados

Here we took our first official cruise excursion, to the Harrison Caves. I’ve been to lots of caves. They’re interesting, but tend to be pretty much the same. We also saw Rihanna’s house and learned all about the Barbadians giving the pedophilic English monarchy the boot.

Harrison Caves with some stalagmites and water

Warm underground waterfall

Dominica

The port was scenic, but we were only allowed to amble (definitely not gambol) along a 200-yard section of the dock in front of the ship, unless on an official excursion. The misty mountains behind the port looked more inviting than the port. Apparently there is world-class scuba and snorkeling here.

Mountains behind the port, with Our Lady of Fair Haven Cathedral steeple visible.

St. Kitts & Nevis

Another day on the ship with a great airport view. As I was checking my flight radar app, I heard a pip-pip-cheerio accent ask “do you reckon that 11am flight will be on time?”. My fellow AvGeek and I had a jolly olde time watching planes for the rest of the day.

You may ask “why don’t you just get off the ship and explore the port?”. It’s because all the ports have the exact same shopping and restaurants, and most of the islands had severe movement restrictions at the time.

American Airlines landing over St. Kitts

St. Thomas

Back in the USSA! Except they drive on the left. What the fuck?

Charlotte Amalie is an absolutely beautiful, and deadly, port. Here we had a sloppily-executed excursion to Coral World, with the standard aquarium stuff. We saw some dolphins perform for fish and walked around the underwater viewing area, which was in the actual bay, not in an artificial fish tank.

Charlotte Amalie pilot boat approaches through a rainbow Charlotte Amalie Harbor Underwater viewing room at Coral World

Half Moon Cay

Holland America’s private island. Pretty much what you’d expect – beachy, clean, dull. What puzzled me was the short time we spent there. Since HAL doesn’t pay dockage fees, it seems like it would be a better experience to stay late into the night. The cost-benefit of the logistics of packing up for a beach day don’t add up.

The Featured Image on his post is taken from Half Moon Cay. That’s all you’ll get and you’ll like it!

So the snow bunny went on a Caribbean cruise.

Did I like it? Nope – I loved it. It was one of the best vacations I’ve ever had. I worried about nothing except my outfit and food choices for a solid 11 days. The food was always available, and always delicious. The staff, particularly the cabin stewards, were friendly and efficient. Some of them had worked for HAL for 20+ years. There was always something happening on the ship – trivia, karaoke, cornhole, pickle ball, etc. if that’s your bag (it’s not mine). We had the drinks package on this cruise, and, to be honest, you could come close to alcohol poisoning trying to drink your limit each day. But it also made partying on the aft deck way more fun, with no concerns about the expense of a particularly crazy night.

If you’re cruise-skeptical and you know how to relax, wind down, let go, and have fun, I’d recommend giving it ta try. If you’re more of the high-octane go-go-go type, I’d still give it a try, but maybe not on Holland America. Each cruise line has its own “culture”, and there are a lot of them.

That’s what I did on my spring break!