Hello? Hello? Is this thing on?

by | Jul 9, 2024 | I Am Lame | 101 comments

Yeah, we screwed up. Here’s a little video to make up for it. The floor is yours.

About The Author



Survey says I’m a Paleolibertarian bitches. That means I eat “L”ibertarians for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Soave tastes a little fruity. Wait a minute, that doesn’t sound quite right…


    • SDF-7

      If nothing else you can always do a short hop back in the timeline, so it isn’t surprising when you get a First.

      • Bobarian LMD

        I wonder how that works? Do you get here and see that you posted first and then know you have to go back and ensure the timeline doesn’t collapse?

      • Brochettaward

        Woh woh woh. Sean may have Firsted, but he is no Three Eyed Firster.

    • SDF-7

      He might be staying out this round so he can go against Kamala in 2028. “At least I didn’t keep prisoners longer to use as slave labor! You were that girl!

    • SDF-7

      Sounds like philosophy.

      I Kant come up with an answer to such a Nietzsche query, sorry.


        I am sure you can find an Engles. Otherwise you will get low Marx.

      • Bobarian LMD

        The talk on a cereal box?

        The Popeye Song?

        I yam what I yam…

      • juris imprudent

        Show up an hour and bring the nihilism.

    • The Artist Formerly Known as Lackadaisical

      Does that make the 25th unconstitutional? (Yes, yes, but these are Democrats we’re talking about)

    • Suthenboy

      How in the fuck do these booger eatin’, mouth breathers get elected? Jesus. I know politics is all theater but at the price we are paying we could at least get a good play, FFS. While these mushbrain totalitarians are saying shit like this the head of their party is shitting his pants on camera.

      • Brochettaward

        Many of them are less elected than they are selected based on their connections. In most places, you slap the right letter after the name and there’s barely any real opposition to threaten you. Voters are stupid and just go along with whatever slop the parties put forth.

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      To a certain degree, I agree. One of the things I consider when choosing a candidate is who is more likely to appoint more acceptable people to cabinet positions or to the judiciary. But the argument here seems to be a little different. Their argument is more like “We’re the team and we’ll nominate the president. Vote for us.”

      • The Other Kevin

        As Trump pointed out in the debate, Biden hasn’t fired one single person. Even if he delegates most of the work, those people should at least be accountable to him if they do a shitty job.

    • rhywun

      “A team of degenerates and far-left lunatics.”


  1. Timeloose

    Based on the movie clip, how did foley artist define the sound of a M-16? They all used this sound effect in movies and TV for years.

    • SDF-7

      “Give me that sound The A-Team uses when everyone is spraying automatic fire and never hitting anything!”

      • Bobarian LMD

        But they still make 5 Ton trucks roll over and cause stunt men to fly thru the air.

      • Timeloose

        They still used the same sound effects on the Ateam for M-16s. The mini-14,s sounded differently

  2. Shpip

    Why are building costs (especially for multi-story apartment and condoplexes) so high? Elevator costs are a microcosm of a larger problem.

    Behind the dearth of elevators in the country that birthed the skyscraper are eye-watering costs. A basic four-stop elevator costs about $158,000 in New York City, compared with about $36,000 in Switzerland. A six-stop model will set you back more than three times as much in Pennsylvania as in Belgium. Maintenance, repairs and inspections all cost more in America, too.

    Archived NYT link. Like most tales about elevators, this one rings true on many levels.

    • SDF-7

      And their answer is “More power to the Feds!”.

      Because of course it is.

      I was pleasantly surprised that after the paragraph about most construction labor being undocumented and because of that, cheaper only in stuff that’s relatively unskilled they didn’t throw in a “This is why we need mass amnesty” bullshit.

      Maybe stop flooding the market with cheap foreign labor to encourage actual Americans to get back into the trades might help regain our ability to “build stuff”? Nah…. must have more top-down mandates instead!

      • rhywun

        Yeah, the assumption that we have to import labor to do that stuff while we continue to pay millions of natives to sit on the couch and watch TV pisses me off.

    • Tonio


      I have worked in a really old building with an ancient elevator system controlled by electromechanical relays. Because, reasons, I had access to the elevator room. It was marvelous. It sounded like a room full of women knitting when one of the cars moved.

      • SDF-7

        Thanks for the personal yarn, Tonio. Sounds like that experience really moved the needle.

      • Spudalicious

        It’s part of the tapestry of life.

    • The Artist Formerly Known as Lackadaisical

      ‘Our broken immigration system cannot supply the labor that the construction industry desperately needs. ‘

      This is a pet peeve of mine. Which countries in Europe he compares us to have higher level of foreign immigration than the US?

      I think it’s a red herring.

      • Nephilium

        Communism has always been a red herring

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      I suspect this is backward: “This tight market for skilled and licensed labor has strengthened the hand of the elevator union — power it uses to create even more of a labor squeeze.” Probably more like the labor unions restrict entry creating an artificially low supply. Similarly the IBEW severely restricts the number of apprentices it allows in it’s programs.

      • kinnath

        The union could not squeeze the labor market without the power and backing of government.

    • Rat on a train

      Who designed the Coronado swastika building?

      • Shpip

        The Dalai Lama, himself. Twelfth son of the Lama. The flowing robes, the grace, bald… striking.

    • ZWAK came for the two-fisted tentacle-fighting, stayed for the crushing existential nihilism.

      If we had mass anarchy, we would be just Latin it all hang out.

  3. UnCivilServant


    I can make this new chip do blinkenlights, but it won’t act on button presses.

  4. juris imprudent

    Long read, but really, really good.

    I disagree with his need to for us all to find God, for as he states, we won’t all find the same one.

    • SDF-7

      Don’t worry — given demographic trends, God will return to politics first in Europe then here (outside of Dearborn where it already has…). And then there won’t be different ones allowed.

      • juris imprudent

        Yes, disputes about God have always been handled so well, so peacefully, throughout human history.

    • EvilSheldon

      Interesting. Sort of an explanation or expansion of the Neo-Reactionary thought from the -teens.

      It founders on the same rock, too. To wit: what is to be done with people like me, for whom belief in the supernatural is as crazy as Phlogiston chemistry?

      • juris imprudent

        I guess in theory we get set up our own new country.

      • EvilSheldon

        That’s not as awful an answer as I was expecting.

      • juris imprudent

        Not much other choice – forcing God on people is as stupid as forcing the leftist bullshit.

      • ZWAK came for the two-fisted tentacle-fighting, stayed for the crushing existential nihilism.

        And that is the rock both “philosophies” crash and burn upon.

    • Evan from Evansville

      “Religion” is part of our species as social primates. No society exists without it, and where areas ‘without’ it are, they are purposefully set aside, either by themselves or through force. “Religion” includes other sorts of higher-order answers to “Why?” “Science” is the same, and certainly more accurate about many/most aspects of life. (So we think…)

      It’s a reality. And like I’ve said, there’s no *need* for it, but there isn’t one for sex, either. Failure, by choice or otherwise taken out of the pool, doesn’t change the reality that sex obviously drives everything. *Shrug*

    • Tundra

      But do we really want to keep a system that is fundamentally at odds with reality and humanity?

      I would say nature. I think that when people find God they find order and nature.

      Really good piece. Thank you. I’ve been through it twice and I’m pretty sure I need a couple more.

  5. kinnath

    Could the people around Biden (who reject any notion that he is having problems) be working to suppress relevant medical treatment for his problems (that could become public) and thus be accelerating his mental decline?

    • SDF-7

      Gah! At least you could just Rickroll, KK — that link is cruel and unusual punishment.


      Gotdurnit … there is a marked difference between assuming a thing to be true and knowing it to be true.

  6. The Late P Brooks

    ‘Our broken immigration system cannot supply the labor that the construction industry desperately needs. ‘

    Swing, and a miss. Try this:

    ‘Our broken immigration education system cannot supply the labor that the construction industry desperately needs. ‘

    • Brochettaward

      Don’t think it takes much education. There’s the rub. We’ve indoctrinated people into thinking that respectable life means going to college.

      • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

        My father in law was an elevator repairman as is my brother in law. I agree, it doesn’t take a lot of education. But working with your hands is culturally frowned upon here.

      • juris imprudent

        You mean you actually use your hands to do things other than just pound a keyboard?

      • Brochettaward

        These hands were made for Firsting.

      • Evan from Evansville

        And then what? One of these days those fists are gonna wank all over ’em?

    • SDF-7

      I would have also accepted “Our continued attempts to circumvent the laws of supply and demand have introduced false scarcity in the construction industry labor market…”

      • Timeloose

        I have a relationship with a tech school. They have a ~90% in field employment rate after graduation. There is an industry need and an institutional response. Just not enough interest from parents and students.

        Those students are top notch doers and makers.

      • ZWAK came for the two-fisted tentacle-fighting, stayed for the crushing existential nihilism.

        I went through a program like that after the financial crash, and if you completed the program, you got a good job out of it.

        And this isn’t some UTI BS, but community college based.

      • Ted S.

        Urinary tract infections are not bullshit. BS is in the digestive tract.

      • Evan from Evansville

        That’s some solid shit, right there. Bravo.

      • ZWAK came for the two-fisted tentacle-fighting, stayed for the crushing existential nihilism.

        So, you eat a lot of shit?

  7. The Late P Brooks

    Dump it

    If you’ve got money in the market, you might own a little piece of Trump Media — without even knowing it.

    Trump Media & Technology is now part of two broad indexes of US stocks: the Russell 1000 Index of large-cap stocks and the Russell 3000 Index. And several popular passive funds — namely index and exchange-traded funds (ETFs) — automatically buy whatever shares are part of those Russell indexes.

    Trump Media (DJT), the owner of conservative social media platform Truth Social, announced its addition to the Russell family on Monday. The company, majority-owned by former President Donald Trump, doesn’t make money and generates very little revenue.

    Just like all the other horrible stocks you’d never buy if you weren’t in an index fund being carried on the backs of a small group of companies.

      • Tundra


    • Brochettaward

      That’s a crack team Biden’s handlers have assembled.

      • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

        Hunter appears from behind the drapes. “Did someone say crack team?”

  8. The Late P Brooks

    Experts have raised significant concerns about Trump Media, which is valued at nearly $6 billion even though it generated less than $1 million in revenue during each of the past two quarters. Its main product, Truth Social, is still a very tiny player in social media.

    Trump Media has been frequently compared to a meme stock that trades on momentum and hype, not fundamentals.

    LinkedIn co-founder Reid Hoffman, a vocal critic of former President Donald Trump, believes Trump Media is really worth just $40 million.

    “The Truth Social numbers are so absurdly out of the realm of normal business,” Hoffman told CNN.

    Now do Tesla.

    • Rat on a train

      Hoffman should short Trump Media.

      • juris imprudent

        And get burned by those stupid short-busters?

    • Shpip

      LinkedIn co-founder Reid Hoffman, a vocal critic of former President Donald Trump, believes Trump Media is really worth just $40 million.

      “The Truth Social numbers are so absurdly out of the realm of normal business,” Hoffman told CNN.

      If he really thought that, he could short the stock and make a killing.

      Of course, he likely knows the adage “The market can stay irrational longer than you can stay solvent.”

      My opinion: if you’ve bought Truth Social, you’ve put your money where your mouth is, but you’re not making an investment.

    • ZWAK came for the two-fisted tentacle-fighting, stayed for the crushing existential nihilism.

      Renting vs. owning has never been the question when it comes to housing supply. I rental is still more expensive when there are fewer places to rent.

  9. The Late P Brooks

    Grocery store Barbie says there oughtta be a law

    If you live in one of the dozens of states where stores aren’t required to post unit prices and the store you’re shopping at doesn’t voluntarily do it, there’s still a solution. However, we’ll admit, it’s more annoying: bring your calculator (or, more realistically, just use your smartphone). Take the total price, the amount that’s in the package, and then divide. Boom, you have the unit price. Do it again for another product, and now you can do an apples-to-apples comparison to help figure out what’s the best value.

    If using a calculator is too inconvenient or nerdy for you, well, then maybe talk to your elected representatives about enacting policies that encourage stores to post unit prices. Then you won’t have to do math.

    NPR wants you to know math is hard.

    • Rat on a train

      Math is for nerds.

  10. The Late P Brooks

    My opinion: if you’ve bought Truth Social, you’ve put your money where your mouth is, but you’re not making an investment.

    It’s like taking the long shot bet on the three legged donkey to win the Kentucky Derby.

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      I once bet on a horse named Buzzard Bait because I figured that maybe the owner had a twisted sense of humor like me and the horse was actually fast. But no, the horse was just slow.

      • Rat on a train

        The horse is normally on the practice squad but they needed a late replacement?

  11. The Late P Brooks

    How about making it easier to build new housing?

    Evil kkkorporations would just buy them all.

  12. Gender Traitor

    No jury duty tomorrow! 😁 Three days down, two to go…

    • Rat on a train

      It’s also my un-jury day!

  13. The Late P Brooks

    No futile and stupid gesture?

    Former South Carolina Gov. Nikki Haley, who unsuccessfully ran for the 2024 Republican presidential nomination, is releasing all 97 of her delegates and encouraging them to support former President Donald Trump at the Republican National Convention in Milwaukee next week, a spokeswoman for Haley tells NPR.

    Haley’s encouragement to RNC delegates to back Trump was first reported by Politico. A spokeswoman for Haley says she will not attend the convention.

    Spokeswoman Chaney Denton says Haley was “not invited, and she’s fine with that. Trump deserves the convention he wants. She’s made it clear she’s voting for him and wishes him the best.”

    A real grownup politician would show up and throw a screaming tantrum.

  14. The Late P Brooks

    Ultimately, Haley did say she would be voting for Trump during a speech at the Hudson Institute, a think tank she joined after dropping out of the race. In May, she pledged to vote for Trump, adding that she hoped he would “reach out to the millions of people” who voted for her in the GOP nominating contests.

    Especially the Democrats who crossed over just to vote for her.

  15. The Late P Brooks

    Nothing but class

    Former Sen. James Inhofe (R-Okla.), who famously called climate change a “hoax” and led the Senate’s Environment and Public Works Committee, has died at 89.


    Inhofe is famous for denying climate science, describing it as a “hoax” in his 2012 book. Former President Trump has also notably used this language to refer to climate change, despite the scientific consensus that it is occurring and primarily being driven by the use of fossil fuels.

    Inhofe threw a snowball on the Senate floor in 2015 to argue against the fact that the planet is heating up.

    The wages of sin is death.

    All good acolytes of science know weather is not climate, and it would be dishonest and wrong to make that assertion.

    • Tundra

      He’s a cunt. Also a terrible pilot. My best friend built a Lancair that won first at Oshkosh in the homebuilt category. He ended up selling it to that demon-spawn who wrecked it. From what I understand it wasn’t his first kill.


  16. grrizzly

    LOL. That’s like Groundhog Day.
    Russia Seeks to Boost Trump in 2024 Election, U.S. Intelligence Officials Say

    The Russian government has launched a “whole-of-government” effort to influence the outcome of the U.S. presidential election and favors Republican candidate Donald Trump in the race, senior U.S. intelligence officials said Tuesday.

    The officials didn’t mention Trump by name, but said that Russia’s current activity—described as covert social-media use and other online propaganda efforts—mirrored the 2020 and 2016 election cycles, when Moscow also favored Trump and sought to undermine Democratic candidates, according to U.S. intelligence agencies.

    • R C Dean

      I doubt the Russians have launched a “whole of government” effort. Am I supposed to believe that the Ministry of Natural Resources and Environment is is involved in online propaganda efforts targeting American voters?

      Lie better, spooks.

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