“I demand you take me to the underground city of rich people!” Donald yelled.
“Mr. President…” Karoline began.
“I know it’s real,” Donald said. “I saw it on Elon’s website.”
“Anyone can post anything in X, sir,” Karoline said.
“That’s silly. Why would anyone say something on X that wasn’t true?” Donald insisted.
Karoline slumped in a faint and Barron caught her before she fell to the floor.
“She’s like one of those goats,” the hat observed.
“I will go to the underground city with you, Father,” Barron said, placing Karoline on The Oval Office settee. “I have always wanted to visit Pellucidar.”
“How in the hell is he making that reference?” the hat asked.
“The boy is a reader,” the hair said proudly.
“How do you know that reference?” the hat asked.
“I don’t know,” the hair replied.
“I can fulfill my destiny in such a savage land,” Barron said. “I’ve been hitting the gym for gains.”
“Savage?” Donald asked. “It’s not savage, it’s the promised land for our people, the rich.”
“Yes, Father,” Barron said. “I just wanted to kill lizard-men.”
“Oh, crap,” the hat said. “He’s found out about the lizard-men.”
“Yeah, that’s not good,” the hair agreed. “Although they are really snake-men.”
“They are really snake-men,” the hat repeated in a prissy voice. “Fuzzy pedant,” he spat.
“There are gold bathrooms everywhere, and Diet Coke on tap,” Donald said. “Every corner has a McDonald’s and they serve McRibs year-around.”
“It sounds like paradise,” Barron said.
“And the golf courses, so classy and beautiful, always green under the artificial sun.”
“An artificial sun, Father?” Barron asked.
“Of course,” Donald said. “It’s dark underground, there has to be an artificial sun.”
“Can I have a sword, Father?” Barron asked. “I need to practice to fight the lizard-men.”
“Have you been playing Dungeons and Dragons with Elon and Big Balls?” Donald asked suspiciously.
“Uncle Elon said you wouldn’t mind,” Barron said.
“You need to be picking out a wife,” Donald grumbled. “You should look over the resumes again.”
“I don’t want an arranged marriage, Father,” Barron said. “Please don’t make me.”
“Off, some of those girls,” the hat muttered.
“I need grandchildren, boy,” Donald said sternly. “Especially after I retire. I need grandchildren to run my McDonald’s franchises.”
“Yes, Father.”
“That will be the new family business,” Donald said. “I deserve to be happy.”
I do like how Trump’s other children have been sidelined. Like in real life.
They just signed deals on three continents.
Pffft. That’s less than half of them.
You speak of the false scions?
If Ivanka is false, I don’t want to be true.
“She’s like one of those goats,” the hat observed.
That’s a showstopper, that is.
My brother has a few of those goats.
I made his wife sad when I told her they why they were originally bred.
They would freeze to be an easy catch and protect the expensive animals from predators
It’s like what they say if you’re a Firster in the woods, always have a seconder with you in case you run into a bear.
How are their personalities?
How does The Hat know that reference? Can he even read? Maybe he was Edgar Rice Burrough’s hat?
Would that be an LA Raiders hat?
You know, for sky pirates!
Serpent people, worshippers of Yig*, seeking the lost city of Mu.
* except for the splitters that worship Tsathoggua.
Not worshippers of Set?
Not SugarFree?
Woman arrested after raccoon named Chewy found with meth pipe in driver’s seat during police stop
https://abcnews.go.com/US/woman-arrested-after-raccoon-named-chewy-found-meth/story?id=121546807
Why did she get arrested, it was obviously the raccoon’s stash.
Did the meth fall out of Chewy’s ass?
You beat me to it. Youtube gave me the bodycam video…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L4QWQiMrGOo
Sometimes the algorithm is a force for good. And Springfield, OH is really coming up in the world.
Watch that footage and tell me Chewy didn’t set her up.
You can’t trust those things, that’s why they wear masks.
On a serious note, those are some rough looking people.
ron73440:
Well, today I learned it is legal to have raccoons as pets in Ohio. You have to buy them from a breeder, and you need to have a permit for them.
I’m willing to go out on a limb, and guess that women did neither.
At least Chewy survived, unlike Peanut.
The story said it was a legal pet.
The fact the racoon pulled out a second pipe when the first one got taken convinced me he set her up.
“Sow set me up!”
Raccoon intervention!
I am so damn proud of Hamilton County right now!
Mom and I got in a huge fight last night over her not pulling Cunty Aunt Susie up short. She’s looking at the money. I’m looking at grinding this bitch into the dirt and Mom is not cooperating with my goal. However, she has a point. My point is that if she doesn’t get ground into the dirt NOW, she will continue to find ways to delay.
So. We have until July 2 to find out what Susie is going to do next to fuck everything up. On purpose.
The longer she stays there in that house, the longer she can keep up the delusion that it’s not going to sell. She’s going to be a pain in the ass to get out so sooner the better if you ask me.
Truth
Bro is right, I think.
It might be worth pointing out to her that even if she tanks the current deal, there were multiple offers, so the damn house is going to get sold. And if necessary, the order to auction it is waiting in the wings.
I like the idea of renting a storage unit and starting to move stuff out of the attic/basement there.
1. She’s not listening to anyone. She’s all but blocked my mom and she’s not taking her lawyer’s advice.
2. Mom already has a storage unit, and most of her things are already there. They’re only allowing their allies in the house and only reluctantly, Mom, and only to get her own things. I am not allowed, and now I don’t think my husband or kids are, either, to help with her own stuff. She’ll have to go alone with movers to get everything else. There is absolutely no possibility someone could go in and pack up their stuff forcibly.
3. The auction is waiting in the wings already. Susie doesn’t seem to think this is real or a threat or anything else. When Mom reminded her, she said, “I don’t appreciate your threats.”
4. Multiple offers offer multiple opportunities for tanking any and all deals.
5. The move of the closing date means she won’t have any money to buy anything new, and she refuses to rent anything, house or apartment. Even my cousin (Susie’s daughter) was like, WTF are you doing??? I fully expect her to have packed/moved absolutely nothing before July 2, when she’s supposed to be out, if it gets that far.
6. There is no “riding her ass.” It just doesn’t budge. Period. Nothing matters but what Susie wants and the world just flows around her like water around a rock. This is what Mom insists. I don’t believe that for a hot minute. She just hasn’t come up against anybody who can put her in her place. I told Mom she could have done it if she’d told Susie to pound sand on the date change, but Mom insists that Susie would’ve never signed it otherwise. Again, I don’t believe that, and Mom won’t let me pin her down. However, she did say that if Susie manages to gum up the works again, Mom was just going to let me loose because their relationship is now irreparably damaged.
Last night, she got after Susie over text for the date change, and in the middle of this, Cunty Aunt Millie called Mom to yell at her, call her names, and tell her she’s becoming as mean and nasty as her daughter. And the thing is … I COULD HAVE been mean and nasty, but I HAVEN’T been, and they don’t even know that.
Hence, asking my lawyer about suing her for acting in bad faith or something. I’d even be willing to file something just to scare the shit out of her and make her spend more money on a lawyer.
My mom just wants her money, and she thinks going along with Susie to get her to sign things will get it.
It will not.
Start moving everything that’s already boxed up out.
Narrator: Nothing is boxed up.
Surely there’s a garage/attic/storage area with stuff that is better gone than weaponized.
After that, it’s “sneak in and remove stuff, go full gaslight mode.”
“What? No, there’s never been a curio cabinet there. The marks on the carpet are a manufacturing defect that’s always been there.”
I am afraid you are correct.
She now has a victory and more time to figure out something else.
Do you think she would damage the house to stop the sale?
Sounds like an episode of The Sopranos.
Are there any contingencies like repair work or anything? If not, it’s really rude to leave a dirty house, so everything has to be out to deep clean it, right?
I just emailed my lawyer asking if there’s a way to sue her for “delay of game.” Acting in bad faith. Whatever.
👍
Some variation of “liquidated damages”?
Yeah, she signed the deal, and the next day she started demanding changes. My first response would have been “You agreed to this yesterday. It’s not changing. I’m not going to be party to you breaking your word.”
Oh, and if she has to be out in less than two months, she needs to be arranging for her next place to live right now. Start riding her ass about where she’s going to go on July 2, and if she’s found a mover yet, etc.
I feel like you and I always have parallel angst. My oldest just saw the doctor this week, and while her ankle is healing, she has 4 more weeks of PT and no work. Meanwhile she’s back to no insurance because she’s making too much for Medicaid. So now she has to get an Obamacare policy. And she is annoying the hell our of Mrs. TOK and I, just staring at her phone every second and getting pissed when we ask her to help with anything. We need a vacation from our own home.
Maybe my daughter and Aunt Susie should get a place together.
Sounds like the basis of a great TV sitcom.
Picture The Odd Couple, only they’re both Oscar.
Fighter jet landing on carrier Truman goes overboard, forcing aviators to eject
You don’t hear about problems like this from the Eisenhower. Now when the Clinton is in service …
Three times is
enemy actiontime to reassign the captain.Obviously the fault of ATC and, by extension, Trump.
Everything goes down on the Clinton.
Hey-yoooo!
All the Nimitz did was lose a sailor to drowning while he was on leave, so they got that going for them.
The collision was a problem, but I think losing jets just happens when they’re launching that many? The most recent was a failed landing, and the other was when the ship made an evasive maneuver while the jet was being moved to the elevator.
Someone should be losing their job, but the deployment and ridiculous focus on the Houthis has likely led them to turn a blindeye to the incompetence.
Before Harry S. Truman became president, he owned a haberdashery.
What hats were the service peoples wearing? Because there’s some irony in there somewhere , that story showing up in The Hat and the Hair…
Muh FREE SPEECHEZ
“Over this past weekend, I was at an establishment in Philadelphia where an incident occurred and Dave Portnoy sensationalized it to his 9.2 million followers on Instagram and X, essentially turning it into a global news story,” the video starts. “Although I had nothing to do with the sign coming out, nor do I know who did it, I know that the sign was provocative because it reminded people a lot of the unjust things that Israel is doing around the world, thus leading me to report on it. Dave Portnoy and his friends can choose to be triggered over the sentiments of that sign and even kick me out of the establishment forever. However, they have no right to destroy my life over free speech and ultimately something that was an edgy joke.”
The 21-year-old then goes on to say, “frankly, they’re more worried about destroying and uprooting me than the thousands of people getting destroyed and uprooted in genocide. That sign had no effects in terms of killing any Jews. However, Israel kills thousands of people on a daily basis. Dave Portnoy and the greater Jewish community are acting as if they are the victims when this whole time I am the victim.”
The suspended student then asks for help from the public.
Free speech means never having to deal with consequences.
What a maroon.
Why is “the student” not named?
Pretty sure the names of the students is out there if you search. At least one story I read said that Temple University was investigating as they were allegedly students there.
The Hindustani Times has his name.
Take a guess.
Don’t leave us hanging Not Adahn
I’m assuming he’s Pakistani, what with the “Mohamed” and the “Khan” parts.
Why do you hate the real victim here?
Who *doesn’t* hate the JOOOOOOS?
God, in alternating chapters of the old testament
A public university has no business suspending someone for saying fuck any group, Jewish or otherwise. That’s not a call to violence.
“Consequences,” said John Wick. (I like that character)
Consequences are not always Just, nor right, nor fair in real life.
Israel kills thousands of people daily? I know they have that whole operation where they make bread out of baby blood, but this seems like a lot.
“genocide”
Seriously, go fuck yourself.
The sign said “Fuck all Jews” IIRC. Aren’t you Jew-haters always going on about, “No, we only hate Israel!”
To be fair, there are some smoking hot Jewesses.
How can you tell when a Jewish woman has an orgasm?
She drops her nail file.
Sure, Jan. 🙄
The war has been going on for 557 days. Thousands a day * 557 days would mean everybody in Gaza has been killed.
Why is “the student” not named?
He is named in the article.
No he’s not. It lists the name of someone who started a GSG, but is not said to be the person involved.
A public university has no business suspending someone for saying fuck any group, Jewish or otherwise. That’s not a call to violence.
They should definitely be asking the admissions department why they accepted somebody so stupid.
I mean, modern universities are just an extension of the public daycare system we have in place in terms of K-12th grade. If you can pay or get the loans, you can probably go to Temple.
They only need you to be smart enough to know how to sign documents.
Guess who gave Bill Cosby a scholarship!
Sign me up! Twice the misery and minimal protection.
https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-news/modernas-combo-covid-flu-mrna-shot-outperforms-current-vaccines-large-rcna205242
Outperforms by what measure?
At padding our profit margins – the only metric that matters.
The main goal of the trial was to see whether the combination vaccine generated more antibodies in blood samples than the current shots against multiple strains of influenza and the XBB.1.5 Covid variant. This so-called serological testing is a common way for researchers to gauge how well a vaccine shot might work and how long the protection might last.
The trial found that antibody levels were higher for Covid and all but one influenza strain in people who got the combination vaccine, compared to those who got the existing shots in both groups.
They measure antibody response. Prior to COVID times I may have accepted that as sound science. Now I have no clue whatsoever.
Mind reader
National political correspondent Maggie Haberman is “not sure” if President Trump has an “actual, specific outcome” planned for the implementation of his tariffs on other countries.
Haberman, a CNN contributor, joined Anderson Cooper on Tuesday after Trump met with Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney as the countries grapple with increased tensions due to Trump’s tariffs.
“Is it clear to you what kind of outcome he’s looking for?” Cooper asked.
“No,” Haberman replied. “And I’m not sure that it’s clear to him what kind of actual, specific outcome he’s looking for, other than one where the U.S. can say we’re on top and somebody else is not.”
Haberman’s remarks come after Trump shared that the United States doesn’t “really want cars from Canada” and after he put a 25 percent tariff on Canadian goods.
For a quarter she’ll guess your weight and tell your fortune.
Ah, so THIS is the person “familiar with Trump’s thinking”.
National political correspondent
So not a journalist and not a report.
What is the actual job of a “correspondent”?
To help someone obtain a divorce?
Trump has said he wants no tariffs. Reciprocal tariffs is how you get zero tariffs or at least lower ones.
Are the people hysterical over his tariff strategy dumb or dishonest? Of course the answer is yes.
The same people are freaking out about his IRS strategy. He has also said he wants rid of the income tax.
As for the Portnoy thing…all parties should just STFU. It is a fake issue.
“where the U.S. can say we’re on top and somebody else is not.”
That’s what presidents do, you moron.
I just emailed my lawyer asking if there’s a way to sue her for “delay of game.” Acting in bad faith. Whatever.
She’s a party to the sale contract, right? She wouldn’t want to be in breach of contract, would she?
“Have you been playing Dungeons and Dragons with Elon and Big Balls?” Donald asked suspiciously.
A fellow man of culture.
“I need grandchildren, boy,” Donald said sternly. “Especially after I retire. I need grandchildren to run my McDonald’s franchises.”
“Yes, Father.”
“That will be the new family business,” Donald said. “I deserve to be happy.”
Beautiful.
Fuckers interrupt the CL match to tell me the conclave has NOT elected a new pope?
And could these CL announcers be rooting any harder for Arsenhole?
Not when the opponent is *spits* PSG.
I think you know I’m sick of the idea that because of the common language, *of course* everybody in the US should be fans of one or another EPL team, and therefore the EPL teams are the only ones that count.
Craigslist?
It’s personal.
Champignons-League
My daughter is further annoying me by saying “No Pope yet” every hour. I’m pretty sure I’ll find out within a day when it happens.
The white smoke indicator is weak. Use fireworks instead.
Rat on a train:
I’ve heard if the pope is male, it’ll be blue smoke, if the pope is male, it’ll be pink.
If the pope is trans, it’ll be purple.
I’m reminded of the Chargers bad 2000 season. I didn’t get to see the end of their only win that season (17-16 against the Chiefs) because the network cut away to announce that Florida had certified their vote on schedule as expected.