Genre – Comedy Film
Movie Total Runtime – 1 Hours 36 Minutes
Spoilers – Yes

Technically, I may have seen this movie before. I remember some scenes, but not enough to say what happened. That falls under Rule C, so I can still review it. The premise is spelled out in the opening text. New Mayor has decided to drop any requirements for admission to the Police Academy. This allows our cast of misfits to gain admittance to someplace they’d never earn a spot by fitness for purpose. We know this isn’t a matter of diversity, because of the characters already on the force. Captain Reed is Black, and Sergeant Callahan is a woman, so the department has admitted both demographics for a while despite the chief’s rant in his first scene. So, our misfits only got in because of the elimination of all fitness standards.

I know it’s supposed to be a comedy, but my firearms safety hackles get raised several times. In the surprise going away party for the high-strung security guard, he has his finger on the trigger before opening a door, then fires in the dark without identifying what was in his line of fire. I know it’s supposed to be a gag about how unsuited this guy is to be armed. I just couldn’t laugh at it. This comes back when they are at the police range and the comedy fat guy negligently discharges a shotgun then sweeps the crowd as he turns around in confusion. At any gun range that shotgun would have been out of his hands and he’d have been back on the bus before you can say “Safety Violation.” Unsafe handling jokes just suck all the humor out of the situation.

I did laugh a few times, but not nearly as much as the filmmakers intended. This does present the biggest problem when reviewing comedies. Humor is subjective. And a lot of the humor in this movie comes from pranks played by the designated protagonist on other characters. Pranks are not funny. Ever. I don’t like the designated protagonist. He’s an asshole who is the cause of all of his own problems. Towards the end of the movie he does start helping other characters with their problems, but it doesn’t counterbalance the ill will built up over 2/3rds of the runtime. Most of the misfits have their own small character arcs, but at no time do I trust most of these people with a position of authority. I was never given a reason to root for any of these misfits, other than any ingrained biases I might have had.

I’m not going to harp on the humor any more.

So what else is there to talk about to fill out the word count?

I guess I could talk about the misfits. In no particular order, we have the whispering woman – short, chubby, unable to make it through the obstacle course, unable to speak assertively – I’m not sure what her motivation for joining the police force was. She does manage to raise her voice at the end of the movie, and roll onto the wall that had thwarted her on the obstacle course. So I suppose we’re intended to take that as improvement? We have no indication if she’s got any brains since she never demonstrates one way or another, and she still has trouble with the bare minimum after her progress.

We have the comedy fat guy, who has much the same difficulties as the whispering woman, and the same arc, which really doesn’t distinguish him except for being fatter.

We have Hightower, who is the exceedingly tall guy. His difficulties come from his temper, his superhuman strength, and his size. His temper gets him kicked out of the academy, but he’s let back in for saving the Lieutenant at the end.

We have the comedically accident prone guy who has no arc and is there to cause slapstick.

We have the Lothario who puts on a fake Latino accent to seduce women but ends up in a henpecked relationship with Sergeant Callahan. Not sure what the joke was with this guy, must have missed it.

We have the rich girl, who doesn’t have an arc because she exists to be the designated romantic interest for the designated protagonist, despite the lack of any real chemistry between the two.

We have the designated protagonist, who is the cause of all of his own problems. I may have said that before, but it’s worth repeating. It’s clear he isn’t stupid and could have found himself a productive vocation before being forced into the academy by Captain Reed, but simply self-sabotaged repeatedly. Too prideful to get on the first rung of the ladder in whatever path through life he actually wanted, if he bothered to pick one. I have no sympathy for the man. His cruelty to random strangers such as the comedy fat guy early on firmly set me against him for the remainder of the movie. A “Prank” of intentionally sending the guy to the wrong place to stir up a commotion in the self-serving effort to get thrown out is still cruel.

We have the high-strung gun nut. As I mentioned, he is not the sort of person who should be around firearms. His reckless disregard for human life in pursuit of the big boom makes him a danger to himself and others. He has no arc.

We have the lackeys who always operate as a double act and assist the lieutenant in trying to get the misfits to quit. They exist to be humiliated by the designated protagonist.

That’s all of the misfits. We also have the lieutenant, who serves as primary antagonist. There is the commandant, who is borderline mentally handicapped. And Sergeant Callahan, who is a German caricature without the accent.

In all, I was kinda disappointed. This was supposed to be a classic comedy.