431 Comments

  1. Count Potato

    “Lawmakers unveil bipartisan bill that aims to ban TikTok in the U.S.”

    Good.

    • WTF

      Everyone knows it’s just CCP spyware.

      • AlexinCT

        That’s why they let it go on so long. Most of the political and money class is in hock to China because China holds the key to all the money they made over there by selling us out over here being repatriable. These fucks are starting to realize China is gonna fuck em over and keep the money anyway, so now many of them are trying to save face.

    • SDF-7

      They really can’t handle Libs of TikTok anymore, hmm?

    • PieInTheSky

      On the one hand free speech. On the other psy op from an enemy country

      • Count Potato

        Banning ink that causes cancer isn’t an issue if free speech.

      • UnCivilServant

        I thought they just slapped a Prop 65 label on the Ink.

    • Trigger Hippie

      Meh. If people are stupid enough to voluntarily allow CCP spyware on their devices I say let them. It’s no more nefarious than what our own government does through social media websites and search engines.

      • SDF-7

        I think it would be reasonable to make it a condition of employment (private or public) given the security concerns. No different from other malware, imho. That’s as far as the feds should push it, yeah.

      • Zwak, who has his own double cross to bear.

        This. It is a free speech issue, there is no remit for banning it on private items, and so on. Banning it on gov’t connected items? Hell yes, and about time. Along with every other social media platform: FB, the ‘Gram, and so on. Gov’t parasites shouldn’t be doing this on time I am paying them anyway.

      • Trigger Hippie

        How’s that any different than what say, Google does? I don’t believe for one second my every key stroke, regardless what website or search engine, isn’t being filed away in some database, somewhere. Even if it never gets a second look it’s being recorded…maybe I’m just paranoid.

      • Pat

        Keylogging is pretty egregious. You basically never see it in legitimate software, outside of maybe exam proctoring. All of Google’s apps collect and warehouse things like your search strings and queries, but even Google probably isn’t outright keylogging.

      • Trigger Hippie

        I’ll take your word for it. I’m sure you know far better than I. Regardless, as a general rule I’m not too keen on the using the law to save people from their own stupidity or ignorance. Even if the danger comes from a hostile foreign nation.

      • Pat

        Don’t mistake me, I wouldn’t be all that shocked if Google was doing it surreptitiously, I’d just want to see some evidence first. I agree with you on the rest, although as I said, I just can’t get it up for opposing a law killing TikTok at this point in my life.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        collect and warehouse things like your search strings and queries, but even Google probably isn’t outright keylogging.

        Important to note is that you don’t have to hit “enter” in most browsers to send the search string. If the browser does that progressive search thing as you type, each keypress goes to Google. If you type “German scheizze porn” and then clear it out and type “my little pony” before hitting enter, Google has record of “g”, “ge”, ger” and so on.

      • Pat

        I’ve had search prefetching disabled for so long, and haven’t queried Google directly in so long, that I had forgotten that even existed.

        Searx or Startpage if you need Google results, kids. I can’t believe I forgot to include that in my privacy schizo series.

    • Pat

      It’s an egregious overstep on the part of the federal government, but I can’t really bring myself to give a shit. It’s like if Vine and Twitter were crack addict first cousins and had a baby.

      • Lackadaisical

        You mean they’re not?

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Nope, don’t like the idea of banning access to websites that don’t deal in illegal content,. It sets a terrible precedent.

      • UnCivilServant

        What about sites whose conduct is illegal even if the content is merely weaponized derp?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Have they actually tried addressing the conduct or did they jump to banning first?

      • UnCivilServant

        We’d have to execute large numbers of them as spies if we did.

      • Zwak, who has his own double cross to bear.

        You say that like it is a bad thing.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Sounds like a good start?

      • Drake

        If they actually tried to enforce privacy (you own your devices and all records of how you use them) it would adversely affect some of their biggest donors. So they just ban the worst offender and ignore the rest.

      • Count Potato

        It’s more of an app than a website.

      • Pat

        There’s no such thing as a website anymore, everything is an app.

      • Drake

        Except this place.

      • Pat

        Out of curiosity, I decided to disable JS and see if the site still runs. It does!

      • Pat

        (Mostly)

  2. PieInTheSky

    Key Lawmakers Announce Government Funding Deal Framework – Uncle Sam gets his due

    • Rat on a train

      Another omnibus. Appropriations is an annual must do that Congress pushes to crunch time so it is easier to slip in items without debate.

  3. Count Potato

    “Sam Bankman-Fried denied bail in Bahamas”

    I guess the “depressed and vegan” excuse didn’t fly.

    • PieInTheSky

      I wonder if he can organize a polycule in prison…

      • R.J.

        He does have a purty mouth…

    • AlexinCT

      You know this guy is an ally of the ruling junta. That they arrested him right before he was due t go talk to congress and denied em bail tells you the junta needs this kid silenced and access to the kid controlled so he doesn’t go as soft and starts spilling the beans. I give it 4 to 3 odds he gets Epsteined sooner than later, cause they need to cover their involvement.

      • Lackadaisical

        Right?

        The timing is too perfect. This story is all kinds of fucked up.

  4. WTF

    Male-to-female transgender hockey player concusses rival at Team Trans event

    “Man pretending to be woman concusses woman pretending to be man.”

    • SDF-7

      “Girls who check boys who check boys who check girls who want boys to face off girls who want girls to puck slap boys… all I want is for someone to play the gaaaame…”

      • Sean

        🙂

    • Not Adahn

      Didn’t Ozy say that the concussion was unrelated to any contact, that the injured party simply fucked up and faceplanted on the ice?

      • R.J.

        I remember reading that also.

      • WTF

        Yeah, well, you’re not going to get any clicks just reporting that.

      • MikeS

        Even the concussed player tweeted out later that they fell and hit their head. No mention about getting checked. But, as WTF said, that won’t get no clicks!

      • Tundra

        The worst on-ice concussion I’ve ever seen was during a pick-up game. Guy went back into the corner to pick up a puck, caught an edge and went down hard. No one near him. Blood everywhere and his pupils were all fucked up and he couldn’t talk. Pretty goddamn scary.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        They would have said that regardless.

      • Drake

        It may have been a trip – video isn’t very clear. But it wasn’t a big hit.

      • Ozymandias

        The giant (former) dude may have – MAY have – brushed the other player, who was just coming out of the box onto the ice and the puck was in the area.
        My in depth video analysis suggests that the most likely cause of the faceplant was that the giant dude – as he was pivoting to get the puck – may have accidentally gotten his stick in the skates of the (former) chick’s legs.

        The cries about “tackles” and “checks” and size difference are all kayfabe; in fact, the whole thing – the brouhaha over it – puts me to mind of the cases that BLM and the race-baiters pick WRT cop shootings.
        I am virulently on the legal record on the issue of transgender (i.e. M2F “Ts”) in women’s sports. It’s insanity.
        BUT – this is not the case to be making claims about that issue because it had nothing to do with Xirs’ size difference, bone density, etc. It didn’t.
        Which raises the question of why THIS is suddenly being publicized, when Lia Thomas, or – even worse, Fallon Fox literally kicking the shit out of women – got a complete pass.

      • juris imprudent

        Because of the woman-cum-trans-man as the victim silly.

      • Brochettaward

        The Bro said it First.

        Also, it was a trans league. Everyone involved agreed to the arrangement. It’s not the same as some bureaucrats forcing women in women’s leagues to play with male-to-female trans.

    • juris imprudent

      Maki’s teammate, Mason LeFebvre, who was the goalie for the team, was visibly shaken by the hit and collapsed on the ground in tears.

      Collapsed to the ground? Weren’t they playing on ice, which was probably the first problem – ice is hard, and slippery.

      • juris imprudent

        “There [was] just an enormous difference in size between the two teams — height, weight, shoulder width, muscles — the differences were plain to even a child,” an audience member told Quillette reporter Jonathan Kay. “I don’t know how the teams were made, but any [fan] could see that this couldn’t possibly be fair, and that someone could get hurt — and someone did.”

        Obvious to a child? Hmm, what other apocryphal tale do we have about what was obvious to a child?

      • MikeS

        Obvious to a child

        I’m actually shocked that clip hasn’t been banned.

    • The Last American Hero

      The dumbass broad who got on the ice with a man is partially at fault for getting on the ice and playing with men. Unless they game was supposed to be a no contact/light contact outing.

  5. PieInTheSky

    Secret Service, ICE secretly coordinated with FBI to strip gun rights, emails show – I trust the FBI to do what is right, so no worries

    • EvilSheldon

      Much like white women – I don’t trust the FBI, but I trust the FBI to be the FBI…

  6. Shpip

    “This one is unusual in the sense that literally there is no record keeping whatsoever,” Ray said at the House Financial Services Committee hearing on Tuesday. “The multi-billion dollar company used QuickBooks.”

    Investor dollars go *poof*.

    Investors: Hey, you stole our money!
    FTX: What money? Prove it!

    • WTF

      “The multi-billion dollar company used QuickBooks.”

      Wait, wut?!

      • Pat

        Why not, our one-time treasury secretary Tim Geithner used TurboTax.

      • SDF-7

        Are you saying it was intuitive for them?

      • Rat on a train

        Well, tried but it was too confusing for him.

      • Fourscore

        I have to give the young man credit for losing/stealing 7B (or whatever) with no attempt to hide anything. Of course the taxpayer will pick up the tab, most likely, but still, genius to steal so much so fast from those that thought they would get rich quickly.

        The Somalians that got 250M in a phony feeding program in the Twin Cities were good but not on the scale of SBF. That little scam seems to have disappeared from the news. Too local.

      • Lackadaisical

        To be fair, they weren’t born with the same connections that this asshole and his weird looking gf had. I’m sure they could pull way bigger numbers if they were deeply embedded in the ruling class.

      • rhywun

        That’s right up there with Twitter doesn’t have a SDLC and everyone has access to Production.

        Sensible business practices are for the sheep.

    • AlexinCT

      Using Quickbooks to do the public books makes it as easy to get rid of the evidence as it was to get rid of Epstein’s list of clients…

    • DrOtto

      This is so when they Epstein his ass, the recipients can deny having received anything and won’t have to pay any of the money back.

  7. Tres Cool

    whaddup doh’

  8. PieInTheSky

    Deportations Plunge Under Biden in US Interior – no human is illegal. Also the least you can do is add Romania to visa waiver…

    • SDF-7

      Look, we’re just not set up for that many coffins full of dirt at our customs checkpoints, okay?

      • Lackadaisical

        Just imagine all the Romanian blood worms and invasive coffin fungus that could be hitching rides on those things.

  9. slumbrew

    “ US Army investigates ‘incidents’ of soldiers posing in uniform with fetish gear”

    I was wondering – even without a name tag, is the constellation of ribbons and devices on the LtCol’s uniform unique enough to identify him?

    • Shpip

      I would be happy to start the rumor that it’s Vindman. Let him find out what it’s like to be the victim of a baseless smear campaign.

      • AlexinCT

        I would not be surprised you start the rumor, then we find he was into much worse… He sure as hell projects that vibe that he is into real fucking freaky shit when he lets down his guard.

    • Rat on a train

      Narrowing down the colonel should be easy with what is displayed (rank, branch, unit, regiment, awards). The other would be more difficult. No unit patch. The regimental crest is branch not unit specific. Awards are mostly generic participation except low level AAM and ARCOM for merit.

  10. PieInTheSky

    US Army investigates ‘incidents’ of soldiers posing in uniform with fetish gear – are the US army chicks as hot as the Israeli army chicks (though I suspect the Israeli army chicks may be propaganda )

    • SDF-7

      With the Biden admin? I suspect the “chicks” are mainly in the Thailand sense — only looking like “Admiral” what’s-his-name.

      • Not Adahn

        I’m sure he’s much better looking with the dog mask on.

    • AlexinCT

      There were no chicks involved. It was a bunch of guys, jealous that that Biden admin nuclear regulatory entity baggage stealing guy had outdone them on the crazy scale, documenting themselves out of uniform in a way to get a court martial. You have to wonder if they thought things had gotten this bad or if there is an agenda to cause more damage to military cohesion/discipline.

      • PieInTheSky

        There were no chicks involved. It was a bunch of guys, – eww gross

    • Count Potato

      Every woman in Israel has to join the military which includes the hottest ones.

      • Brawndo

        The hots ones play dress up for propaganda Instagram videos. The ugly ones get sent to patrol Palestine.

  11. Not Adahn

    Sam Bankman-Fried denied bail in Bahamas

    SBF is still alive?

    • Pat

      Hillary Clinton was sorry to hear of his passing next week.

      • SDF-7

        Nice one.

    • SDF-7

      (Palpatine voice)

      For now.

      (/Palpatine voice)

    • PieInTheSky

      His body double at least

      • R.J.

        He’ll be played by Brad Pitt at the trial.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        He can’t be. I’ve already contracted Brad to play me in my life story.

        But I hear Bobcat Goldthwaite is still around.

      • AlexinCT

        Not true. He is playing me.

      • UnCivilServant

        Bold choice going with Bobcat.

      • AlexinCT

        It was him or Dave Chappelle.

  12. Pat

    DeSantis to investigate Covid vaccine-related injuries

    Much like our election system, even if there’s some “there” there, the entire process by which the vaccines were tested, approved and deployed was deliberately designed to be impervious to investigating. And ultimately it doesn’t really matter anyway: the vaccine makers have blanket immunity from liability, and the victim compensation fund the feds set up as a backstop when they granted them said immunity is in worse shape than the “social security trust fund.”

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      The effort should be to shame the pols into doing something. The only way to do that is to build public outrage, and DeSantis is assisting here.

      If the pols turn, the liability shield will evaporate as it doesn’t cover fraud. The government will never admit wrongdoing, but they will absolutely turn on Pfizer and Moderna if it becomes politically expedient to do so.

      • Pat

        I’d love to see it, but after the lockdowns and 2/3 of the country clamoring to get their 16th booster, I don’t think there’s quite literally anything that could convince a lot of people.

      • Brawndo

        I don’t think it’s anywhere near that many still getting boosters. I seem to recall a recent Fauci interview where he was bitching that only 11% (this number could be wrong it’s been awhile) had gotten the most recent booster.

    • Tundra

      I think you are correct. Even if there was a serious attempt to investigate, the data is so thoroughly corrupt that any attempt to tease signals out would be pointless.

      • Brawndo

        The data being corrupt *should* be the crime in a sane world. Too bad we live in clown world.

      • Lackadaisical

        And if a ‘there’ was there, and they found it, the left would just say that it’s a nothing burger and we always knew there were side effects, but it’s better than killing grandma.

        Just like with the Twitter files: deny anything exists, once confronted with overwhelming evidence, pretend like you always agreed it happened, but somehow it’s irrelevant.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I hear the unvaccinated spill their beers more often as well.

      • Trigger Hippie

        I heard unvaccinated children are more likely to choke on Lincoln Logs.

      • SDF-7

        Don’t know why — but on first read I found myself picturing those poor unvaccinated chickens trying to choke down Lincoln Logs and was quite puzzled….

      • Trigger Hippie

        You have your ways to choke your chicken, I have mine.

      • Jarflax

        I think the Lincoln Project types are more likely sporting twigs than logs.

    • SDF-7

      Not mentioned — elderly more likely to take vaccine, young/healthy adults more likely to assess the risk and opt out. Elderly drive less, younger males known for more hazardous driving.

      And that’s just off the top of my head compared to “They’re more likely to distruct the government and therefore ignore the rules of the road, MAN!” from the article.

      • Pat

        We learned about confounding variables in freshman math in high school.

      • whiz

        The actual journal article says that after adjusting for “age, sex, home location, socioeconomic status, and medical diagnoses” that there was still a 48% increase (as opposed to a 72% increase without adjusting for those variables).

    • Sean

      and insurance companies might base changes to insurance policies on vaccination data, the authors suggest. 

      FUCK YOU.

      • SDF-7

        Alternate take: “We really want our social credit score and thought we’d get it with the vax passports! Waaah!”

      • rhywun

        That’s the meat of the story right there.

        Same bullshit social engineering they do with smoking nicotine use.

      • Sensei

        No they won’t.

        Certain minority groups also are vaccinated at lower percentages.

      • rhywun

        Good point.

        Which means they will implement it and then it will bounce around the courts for a few years while wrecking a bunch of lives.

      • Sensei

        Recall insurance is 50 state regulated. Plus DC and PR.

        So you’d have prove that this rating variable is significant and non-discriminatory to each state.

        It’s not worth it. Credit rating which is used as rating variable by just about every one is basically going to capture this. My WAG is that there is a high correlation between vaccination status and high credit rating.

      • UnCivilServant

        In my family, the higher the credit rating, the lower the probability of having been injected with a clot shot.

        I don’t have data points beyond that.

      • Sensei

        I’m thinking “Karen”.

      • UnCivilServant

        Don’t let the vocality of a small minority skew your perceptions.

        We need better data.

      • Sensei

        I’ve that I’m well aware. Hence the WAG qualification.

      • Count Potato

        They’ll just add a discount for that. Just like women pay less for car insurance in the U.S.

      • Sensei

        It’s been decades, but I believe that is no longer a rating variable in most states anymore.

      • Drake

        Now you only get a discount for installing a tracking device so you can be spied on.

    • Not Adahn

      Yanno, if they’d just do a study showing that the vaccine made your dick bigger, they’d get a lot less resistance.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Probably very true

      • Not Adahn

        Pfizer — hire me to do your experimental design. I’m really cheap at $10MM/yr + per study bonuses.

      • Jarflax

        If your clot hard on lasts longer than 4 hours please see your physician.

    • AlexinCT

      Lies, damned lies, and statistics…

      These asshats show you they are deceptive cuntes or can’t do basic math/stats. The reason you have more unvaxxxed people having accident is the same as the reason you had more vaxxed people die: the numbers. When a majority of people are vaxxxed, especially high risk people, you will have more casualties if you don’t control for those discrepancies. Similarly, you have more unvaxxxed people having accidents because they are far more likely to be doing most of the driving in these days of everyone just staying home. The fact some asshole actually wrote this shit up though, is proof we need to start hanging some fucks from lampposts.

    • Jerms

      The Canadians put out studies like this, but when 80+ young vaccinated doctor die mysteriously within a few months its ignored.

    • Brawndo

      Interesting. Women and Asians seemed to be demographics more likely to get the vaccine.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Conformist tendencies

  13. Shpip

    In 10 states and Guam, declines of greater than 80 percent were recorded. In 33 others, drops of 60 to 80 percent were recorded. In the remaining states, declines of at least 23 percent were recorded.

    If the usual suspects (Haitians, Venezuelans, Guatemalans, etc) are walking or taking makeshift rafts to Guam, I say we let them stay. Something tells me that it’s Pacific Rim / Filipino types overstaying their visas, though.

  14. PieInTheSky

    Enoch Burke to remain in jail as he refuses to purge contempt
    Teacher pleads for release for Christmas, saying he is ‘not a thief, a murderer or a drug dealer’

    https://www.irishtimes.com/crime-law/courts/2022/12/13/enoch-burke-to-remain-in-jail-as-he-refuses-to-purge-contempt/

    “Enoch Burke will remain behind bars for the festive period after he again refused to obey a court order to stay away and refrain from teaching at a secondary school where is employed as a teacher.

    The school brought High Court proceedings against Mr Burke over his alleged failure to comply with the terms of his suspension on full pay from the school.

    The school, represented by Rosemary Mallon BL, obtained the order committing Mr Burke, who had been suspended pending the hearing of a disciplinary hearing into allegations of misconduct against him, to prison over his failure to comply with the terms of an injunction requiring him to stay away from the school until the disciplinary process has been completed.

    Mr Burke, a History and German teacher, was suspended on full pay late last August pending an investigation into alleged misconduct.

    The school claims that his refusal to comply with the injunction was disruptive to the school’s students.

    In a counterclaim Mr Burke says he should never have been the subject of disciplinary process after he expressed his objections to the school’s direction to its staff regarding how to address a student who wishes to transition from male to female, seeks various orders and declarations against the school.”

    This sounds so weird… if he is suspended he cannot go teach as I assume his classes are suspended as well or done by someone else. Eh the Irish they are probably all drunk anyways

    • AlexinCT

      German teacher? Scheisse porn violations!

      /Scumbags looking to punish someone they don’t like

    • Lackadaisical

      I don’t believe this that’s crazy, can’t they just have him trespassed off the property like a normal person? I guess the judge just had his authoritah boner raging.

  15. Not Adahn

    The Angel of Layoffs has passed over my department. I remain unraptured.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Good thing you marked your office door with the blood of those interns.

      • The Last American Hero

        Hell, just hang a BLM sign and a rainbow flag. No way HR is going to invite the legal mess that comes with laying off that person.

      • Not Adahn

        I have a suspicion that you might be wrong about that in this particular case. It was supposed to be 5% of the total workforce, 10% of the executive titles, and <<5% of the manufacturing force.

    • SDF-7

      Did you have to sprinkle the blood of an intern on the walls of your cube?

      (More seriously — congrats. Haven’t been visited in my neck of the woods, but certainly aware it could start happening as the market cools across the board, but especially in tech).

    • Nephilium

      Good news. Just saw today that Cisco was doing a round of layoffs.

      The new place I was interviewing for has put all hiring on hold for the remainder of the year, and will be revisiting positions come the new year. They’re hopeful that they’ll be able to provide a written offer early January.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        No layoffs in [insert my current tech company here], but they’ve been in a hiring freeze/reduced hiring situation for over 6 months. We’re struggling to keep up with all the work.

        I gave 2 companies an ultimatum to offer or GTFO, deadline today. They’ve been dicking around for weeks and I only have so long I can undo the internal transfer I’ve been offered. Otherwise, I’ll take the meager raise and department transfer internally and then piss and moan until they give me fully remote.

      • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

        I got caught up in that one on Monday. Merry F’ing Xmas.

      • slumbrew

        Sorry, dude.

      • slumbrew

        We’ve got about 200 open reqs, many/most of which are remote.

        Hit me up at my handle at protonmail.com if you’re interested.

      • Swiss Servator

        swissservator – at – gmail.com

        I halp!

      • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

        You sound suspiciously like STEVE SMITH.

    • Grummun

      My employer is still hiring, and has gone so far as to implement some stop-loss policies to bribe encourage current IT staff to stick around.

  16. Tundra

    Good morning, Banjos!

    “This one is unusual in the sense that literally there is no record keeping whatsoever,” Ray said at the House Financial Services Committee hearing on Tuesday. “The multi-billion dollar company used QuickBooks.”

    You just can’t make this up. Also, I’ve noticed that the money laundering part of this scam has completely disappeared.

    Think the little fucker will see 2024?

    • AlexinCT

      Yes, in an article telling us it is unfair that he committed suicide in custody, after all the cameras failed and on the one day the records for which guards were on duty was missing, from an attempt to hang himself that resulted in 2 bullet holes to the back of the skull, because of something…

    • The Last American Hero

      I think the Netsuite commercials for next year are going to be great!

  17. Not Adahn

    For those who might be interested in practical shooting:

    While I do not own a TV [/hipster] There is apparently a cable network called Outdoor Life Network, and on this network is a show called “Shooting USA.” Tonight they will be broadcasting footage of the Race Gun Nationals and PCC/Production Nationals. I assume my back and/or left arm will be in frame as there was a camera guy following me as I was the guy timing the “super squad.”

    • UnCivilServant

      So, what ethnicity will you be in the NetFlix adaptation?

      • Not Adahn

        How much is Big Man Tyrone these days?

    • Pat

      I now remember that time OLN broadcast the PSP Paintball World Cup in like 2002…

    • Count Potato

      “While I do not own a TV”

      Is it the heroin habit, or your job as a hitman?

      • Not Adahn

        It dates back to when I realized that I was spending all of my spare recreational time playing World of Warcraft and decided the TV bill would be better put to use as pizza money.

      • UnCivilServant

        I realized I wasn’t having fun in World of Warcraft before I realized I wasn’t watching the TV.

      • Pat

        Playing video games to have fun? You must be daft.

      • The Last American Hero

        Be honest. You used it to invest in NFT’s.

    • EvilSheldon

      A word of caution – much like fucking, USPSA is a lot more fun to do than to watch.

      • Not Adahn

        I am hoping the play-by-play commentary going on at the time was a joke, because if not, it’ll be dishonest.

        From memory:

        *golf play-by-play voice*

        “…and she hits the activator, oh! A tuxedo bobber! She’s not going to like that presentation.”

        For those of you not in the game — the shooter knew exactly what kind of target was going to be presented by the activator, there’s no surprise whatsoever.

    • R.J.

      ‘Not Adahn’s Left Arm’ is now an available Glibs handle.

  18. Scruffy Nerfherder

    SJWednesday: Rubbing One Out

    When you hear the word “massage,” what comes to mind? One of the most popular images is of a thin, white woman relaxing on a table. “Massage therapy is so often put on a pedestal in a privileged way,” says J Sheffield, a body worker, massage therapist, and sex educator based in Washington, D.C. In popular imagination, “It’s for white, straight cis women to relax.”

    Of course, this is incorrect: people around the world have practiced forms of healing touch for millennia. But in the contemporary United States, people who are marginalized in some way — queer and trans folks, people of color, people with disabilities and fat people — experience discrimination that can make it difficult to access massage. Professional massage might be financially inaccessible; practitioners might cause racist or transphobic harm; and even well-meaning friends can ignore our boundaries when giving a casual shoulder rub.

    What’s more, in a patriarchal society — especially one wherein Christian nationalists are systematically depriving trans people and women of bodily autonomy — many of us are taught to see pleasure as shameful. We aren’t given permission to explore touch that feels good. When our consent is violated, we begin to associate touch with danger.

    As a massage therapist and sexuality educator, J pushes back against these harmful messages. They reclaim massage as a form of self- and community care by centering queer and trans people, offering sliding scale rates especially to folks of color, and facilitating workshops on sensual massage. “Touch can be part of pleasure. Touch can also be in our control,” says J.

    • SDF-7

      Short version: “We should be more hedonistic. And the US is baaaaad!” ? Other than that, it is word salad and strawturtles all the way down.

    • Trigger Hippie

      They really are running out of things to grievance monger over, aren’t they?

    • AlexinCT

      So is the call for more land whales to have to be rubbed down?

      • Sean

        *lights the Tres signal*

    • PieInTheSky

      When you hear the word “massage,” what comes to mind? One of the most popular images is of a thin, white woman relaxing on a table – yeah in my image the thin white woman is not relaxing

      • AlexinCT

        Tell us more….

    • Pat

      When you hear the word “massage,” what comes to mind? One of the most popular images is of a thin, white woman relaxing on a table.

      I must have spent too much time around libertarians. The first thing that comes to my mind is a fresh-off-the-boat Filipina catching a solicitation charge when the local Keystone Kops finally have to show something for all the undercover happy endings they’ve been getting at Lee Ho Fooks Asian Massage Parlor.

      • AlexinCT

        Banner over the place says “We always deliver happy endings”?

      • Lackadaisical

        Same here, except in my mind she was Thai.

    • WTF

      Christian nationalists are systematically depriving trans people and women of bodily autonomy

      Show your work.

      • Lackadaisical

        Abortion bans and trying to keep kids safe from perverts = Christian nationalism.

    • Nephilium

      Yeah. Tell that to Deshaun Watson.

    • Count Potato

      “offering sliding scale rates especially to folks of color”

      How is that even legal?

      • MikeS

        Because equity! That’s why!

      • Lackadaisical

        In my mind I like to imagine that it’s free if you’re the blackest on the scale and as you get lighter and lighter the price goes up.

    • juris imprudent

      As a massage therapist and sexuality educator

      Military intelligence, jumbo shrimp…

      What are things that don’t go together?

      • AlexinCT

        “I am from the government and I am here to help you”.

    • The Other Kevin

      The Mrs. and I are into the sports and such, so what comes to mind is decidedly not sensual. It’s more like physical therapy. Our massage lady is going to cause some pain until she fixes what need fixin’.

    • B.P.

      “Professional massage might be financially inaccessible;”

      People who don’t have money in their budgets to buy a thing don’t get the thing? This is going to require lots and lots of research.

  19. SDF-7

    ‘Orning ‘ordles — preliminary round sucked great big gobs of greasy grimy gopher guts… main event was tolerable, though as per my usual… not up to the standards the rest of y’all hold.
    Chumptown remains in turmoil as their Dictator For Life continues to avoid the city center (for the round that counts).

    Daily Duotrigordle #287
    Guesses: X/37
    Time: 05:35.47
    https://duotrigordle.com/

    Daily Quordle 324
    8️⃣6️⃣
    4️⃣5️⃣
    quordle.com

    • Tundra

      Daily Quordle 324
      8️⃣6️⃣
      4️⃣5️⃣

      Ditto.

    • Pat

      Daily Quordle 324
      5️⃣7️⃣
      3️⃣4️⃣

      UR can fuck off

    • Sean

      Daily Quordle 324
      7️⃣5️⃣
      6️⃣3️⃣
      quordle.com

      • Grosspatzer

        Daily Quordle 324
        6️⃣8️⃣
        5️⃣3️⃣
        quordle.com

    • robc

      Chessle 305 (Expert) 6/6

      🟩🟩⬛⬛⬛⬛🟨⬛⬛🟨
      🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟨🟨⬛⬛⬛
      🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟨⬛🟩🟩⬛
      🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩⬛🟩🟩⬛
      🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩⬛🟩🟩🟩
      🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

      https://jackli.gg/chessle

      Whew, sqeaked it out.

      • robc

        x8
        67

        blech

    • whiz

      Daily Quordle 324
      6️⃣7️⃣
      4️⃣2️⃣
      quordle.com

    • Jarflax

      Daily Quordle 324
      7️⃣9️⃣
      5️⃣3️⃣
      quordle.com

    • Grummun

      8 3
      6 5

    • Grumbletarian

      Daily Quordle 324
      9️⃣6️⃣
      5️⃣4️⃣

  20. Pat

    We’re Slowly Killing The First Amendment

    The First Amendment isn’t dying because state actors and a political party colluded with giant tech platforms and media outlets to censor speech and sabotage elections. All of that is just a byproduct of a corrosive trend. It’s clear to me that many Americans have stopped idealizing free expression. They don’t view it as a neutral value or societal good. Not even a platitude. They definitely don’t believe in counterspeech doctrine. Some people, in fact, are fine with compelling their fellow citizens to say things.

    Technocrats, “journalists,” the president, and self-styled experts often view unfettered speech as a cancer that threatens “diversity” or “social justice” or “democracy” or “the environment” or “safety” or “unions” or dozens of other issues that are perched high above speech in the hierarchy of modern values. The First Amendment doesn’t work because guys in powdered wigs wrote down words — as Scalia once said, every “banana republic in the world has a bill of rights” — but because society embraces its underlying values, as they did due process or property rights. The spirit of the thing matters.

    You don’t have to be a free-speech absolutist to believe that banning the president from tweeting on an allegedly neutral platform undermines the spirit of open discourse.

    We are now often a society of self-censors, which, as Orwell noted, is as pernicious as any other variant. Sure, you can have your say, the leftist assures you. You just can’t have it on any platform or outlet with wide reach. Just look at the thermonuclear meltdown on the left over the sale of Twitter to Elon Musk — a man whose sin is professing to believe what any self-respecting liberal did a decade ago.

    • SDF-7

      Leftists: So TL;DR — The Long March Through the Institutions worked?

      • rhywun

        Beyond their wildest dreams.

    • PieInTheSky

      The First Amendment is not a suicide pact. hate speech is not free speech. Protect our Democracy. We cannot tolerate intolerance.

      • Lackadaisical

        “We cannot tolerate intolerance.”

        20 years ago I was hearing this from the idiot leftists in highschool(most students). Things are finally coming to fruition for the left.

    • AlexinCT

      Slowly? Accademia has convinced a couple of generations of brain dead idiots that words are violence – an idiotic belief only someone that has never experienced real violence could entertain – and these morons now believe they have a right to not only never feel offended, but of punishing anyone they accuse of offending them with permanent cancelation from society.

      • WTF

        words are violence

        My response to any idiot stupid enough to say this: Let’s do an experiment, I’ll say mean things to you for 10 seconds, and then I’ll punch you in the face for 10 seconds. Then see if you can tell which one is violence and which one is not.

      • AlexinCT

        The proper scientific way to conduct this experiment and get a final and indisputable answer, is to then repeat it enough times to confirm the results. So, when doing this, repeat it at least a dozen more times, to make sure the idiot can’t accuse you of biasing the whole thing. After having a dozen or a score of people talking mean to them and then bitch-slapping sense into them for 10 seconds each, they will have no scientific leg to stand on with their claims…

      • juris imprudent

        That’s not exactly fair. How about YOU say mean things to me to hurt my feelings, and then I punch your nose really hard. Then we can compare what hurts the most.

      • AlexinCT

        You can add a few of these as controls to the experiment I recommend…

      • WTF

        I’m not the idiot who can’t tell the difference between the two.

      • juris imprudent

        I didn’t mean you, but the you in your proposal.

    • Rat on a train

      Americans don’t have principles just wants. They want by any means necessary.

      • B.P.

        This. Free speech was a valuable principle when communists were being persecuted. Just like Erdogan’s trolley, they’ve reached their stop and it’s time to get off.

  21. PieInTheSky

    The “Stochastic Terror” Lie
    The Left’s latest gambit for suppressing speech is built on preposterous grounds

    https://www.city-journal.org/stochastic-terrorism-is-about-suppressing-free-speech

    In an opinion piece for Scientific American, writer Bryn Nelson insinuated that my factual reporting on Drag Queen Story Hour was an example of “stochastic terrorism,” which he defines as “ideologically driven hate speech” that increases the likelihood of unpredictable acts of violence. On the night of the attack, Nelson argued, I had appeared on Tucker Carlson Tonight to discuss my reporting, and, hours later, the alleged attacker, David DePape, radicalized by “QAnon” conspiracy theories about “Democratic, Satan-worshipping pedophiles,” broke into the Pelosi residence and attacked Paul Pelosi with a hammer.

    This is a bizarre claim that, for a magazine supposedly dedicated to “science,” hardly meets a scientific standard of cause and effect. There is no evidence that DePape watched or was motivated by Tucker Carlson’s program; moreover, nothing in my reporting on Drag Queen Story Hour encourages violence or mentions Nancy Pelosi, QAnon, or Satan-worshipping pedophiles.

    • AlexinCT

      As soon as you hear some person or entity is dedicated to science or scientific consensus is brought up, assume you are dealing with propaganda. Real science comes only from reverence and adherence to the scientific process, which by its nature demands any hypothesis to stand against brutal scrutiny and challenge, or fall by the wayside. That’s the one system that prevents human motivations from polluting any real scientific discovery. If you can’t challenge the bullshit peddled, even if peer reviewed by a circle jerk of like minded drones, it is propaganda and not science.

      • Rat on a train

        scientific consensus
        Nature doesn’t care how a group votes.

      • WTF

        Talk about an oxymoron. Science is not done by consensus, it is done by hypothesis and testing.

      • Not Adahn

        Akshually, while you are describing the scientific method, science is done as a social activity.

    • Count Potato

      “broke into the Pelosi residence and attacked Paul Pelosi with a hammer.”

      Because we know that’s what happened?

    • EvilSheldon

      I heard Stochastic Terror opening up for Tosca and Sarah Longfield. They were okay.

    • Spartacus

      It’s so sad to watch a once-respectable journal descend into political hyperbole and incoherence.

  22. Sensei

    Hunter Biden’s Laptop and 2020’s First Big Lie

    When you say the Hunter Biden laptop story was real, Democrats and their media allies respond that the private embarrassments of Hunter Biden aren’t news.

    When you say a large retinue of former top intelligence officials lied when they portrayed the laptop as a Russian intelligence operation, they say there’s no evidence that Joe Biden profited from his son’s activities.

    When you say Twitter censored a legitimate news story and active-duty FBI officials may have encouraged the company to do so, they insist that Twitter is a private company and that Hunter’s activities were not illegal and had already been widely reported to the public.

    In other words, the defenses now filling the media evade every important question. Only one intellectually honest statement has been heard anywhere and that was offered months ago by liberal philosopher and podcaster Sam Harris: Yes, the laptop story was true and newsworthy. Yes, intelligence veterans and the press lied in suppressing it to help Joe Biden. And he supports their doing so.

    • R C Dean

      “no evidence that Joe Biden profited from his son’s activities”

      A common maneuver. There’s no evidence because there has been no investigation. And there has been no investigation because there is no evidence.

      Move along, comrade. Nothing to see here.

      • Gustave Lytton

        I heard that in Sir Humphrey’s voice.

      • Fatty Bolger

        I mean, there’s the emails, and unusual financial transactions between the two, and a former business partner and witness who has testified otherwise, but yeah, other than that… absolutely no evidence worth further investigation.

      • Rat on a train

        “The seriousness of the charge warrants an investigation.” Oops, forgot who the target was.

    • Pat

      I can’t decide if calling Sam Harris a philosopher is an insult to Sam Harris or philosophers.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      Hunter’s activities were not illegal

      Um.

      • The Other Kevin

        Crack and prostitution are legal in most states now, didn’t you hear?

    • AlexinCT

      That someone spent time doing this and has not been locked up and medicates is proof a s a society, is proof we are heading for Ragnarok.

      • PieInTheSky

        that is what a suburbia supremacist would say

    • Pine_Tree

      OK, I’ll play: I suppose my real answer centers on the one called “Market Urbanist”, with big helpings of the ones above and below it – “Aesthete” and “Private Property Absolutist”.

  23. PieInTheSky

    In the category in local news a Romanian girl one one of those Italian beauty shows I occasionally link. What is weird is the age of 15. I always thought they are over 18, though some looked young, given they were parading in front of old men in skimpy bikinis. Apparently not. I mean 15 seems kinda young though.

      • Fourscore

        “parading in front of old men in skimpy bikinis”

        No foul, no harm. No judgment, please

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Unless it’s changed, the modeling business is still rife with ephebophiles.

      • PieInTheSky

        and actual groomers…

    • Count Potato

      There are tons of underage fashion models. Some as young as 13. Abuse is rampant. If I recall that Calvin Klein ad some people were upset about the girls were 11 and 12. That was 30 years ago and nothing has changed.

      • Tundra

        I know a girl who achieved great success as a fashion model. She started in her early 20s and said that she was often far and away the oldest. She also said she would not let her daughter anywhere near the business.

    • R C Dean

      old men in skimpy bikinis

      That’s not something I want to see.

    • UnCivilServant

      So, the Cambridge dicionary has decided to be worthless, got it. Never accept their definitions for anything.

    • AlexinCT

      Orwell described this already in 1984:

      “Every record has been destroyed or falsified, every book rewritten, every picture has been repainted, every statue and street building has been renamed, every date has been altered. And the process is continuing day by day and minute by minute. History has stopped. Nothing exists except an endless present in which the Party is always right.”

    • Pat

      Ironically enough, that’s Dictionary.com’s word of the year.

      Dec. 13 (UPI) — “Woman” has been named the 2022 Word of the Year by Dictionary.com, which called the word “inseparable from the story of 2022” for its relevance to abortion rights and gender identity.

      Dictionary.com announced “woman,” defined simply as “an adult female person,” as its Word of the Year on Tuesday. The dictionary website called it one of the “oldest words in the English language” that has evolved into a source of “intense personal importance and societal debate.”

  24. db

    Secret Service, ICE secretly coordinated with FBI to strip gun rights, emails show

    If they were coercing people to sign these self-reporting forms, that’s awful.

    On the other hand, if a person has a known diagnosis of unstable mental conditions, and chooses to self-report to prevent himself from lawfully buying a firearm in the future out of a concern for what he might do in a bad state, I’m fine with that. As long as the individual has the right to retract the request in the future–but that would probably require some sort of medical certification to mental stability from a professional, which is likely going to be impossible to get.

    • Pat

      Never. Talk. To. The. Cops.

      Even if you have been diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia, suicidal major depressive disorder, and prescribed antipsychotic medication: Never. Talk. To. The. Cops.

      • AlexinCT

        Without a lawyer…

      • EvilSheldon

        The lawyer is there to do the talking for you.

      • R C Dean

        I would go with “Especially” rather than “Even if”.

      • Lackadaisical

        Same here.

    • AlexinCT

      Yup. And when some entity actually has members that do things like write books and throw plush parties in ultra rich setting where these elite regularly fly private jets to regularly meet to talk about how they plan to destroy existing society and replace it all with a return back to a feudal one, so the credentialed technocratic class and the super wealthy doing this shit can become a hereditary aristocracy, it is no longer just a conspiracy theory.

    • Lackadaisical

      I wish I had just a little bit of cancer to feel really healthy, said no one ever.

    • AlexinCT

      It’s all theatre.

    • WTF

      Look, if we don’t have our dicks stuck into multiple forever wars around the globe, how the Hell are they supposed to keep laundering all that fucking money?

      • Dr. Fronkensteen

        Infrastructure spending? Drug war?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      It’s just a couple hundred thousand Yemeni civilians.

      But Putin bad!

      • Brochettaward

        The Saudis just helped us negotiate the release of Brittney Griner. A national treasure is back stateside because of our trusted allies in the desert. Now you want us to abandon them as they fight off the endless aggression of Yemen?

    • Certified Public Asshat

      Bernie might be the biggest cuck of all time.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I can’t figure out Lee and Paul on this one.

        What the fuck?

    • Tundra
      • Rat on a train

        Yet another reason to avoid Best Buy.

      • Lackadaisical

        Good to know. Disgusting.

    • AlexinCT

      Tells you who their big donors are…

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      But if those guys don’t teach those kids what color lipstick goes with what color rouge who’s going to do it?

  25. juris imprudent

    Ken Cuccinelli, who was a top DHS official under former President Donald Trump, told the Washington Examiner he finds it “shocking” that ICE appears to have used the FBI forms. This is because ICE and the FBI have different areas of focus, he said.

    I’d rag on this being another stellar Trump hire, but hell, none of the politicals really know what is going on, nor do they actually run their departments. That falls to the SES and senior Civil Service people, which is what makes the Sam Brinton hire interesting. I thought he was an appointee, but it turns out he was an SES hire. SES hires are NEVER supposed to be politically driven (the professional bureaucracy at GS-15 has first dibs) and yet that is exactly what he/they was, because he sure as shit was not otherwise qualified for that level position.

    • AlexinCT

      Trump had no experience with the revolving door of government corruption and ineptitude. That hurt him bad. He would have been better off just picking random people in the public at his campaign meetings and put them in charge.

      Anyone that has been in any government bureaucracy’s unelected office in the past should be considered to heavily tilt towards ineptitude and corruption, and not be allowed near it again.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      They’ll look the other way for certain politics, obviously. If he dressed that way but had a fetish for don’t tread on me hats he’d have lasted about five minutes.

      • juris imprudent

        No, SES hires are usually pretty rigorous. I mean we can quibble about how they are still a product of the bureaucracy, but they don’t tend to just randomly hire people like the political appointee level does. This was obviously a purely political hire, and in fact some GS filed a grievance earlier this year. No doubt that will now be closed out as moot.

  26. Count Potato

    “At the @OversightDems hearing on white supremacy, Rep. @NancyMace asked witnesses if extremist rhetoric on social media is a threat to democracy. Trans activist Alejandra Caraballo @Esqueer_ said, “Yes.” The congresswoman then presented Caraballo’s tweets.

    Far-left activist Alejandra Caraballo/@Esqueer_ calls for the censorship of the right, including pushing for Yoel Roth to ban being able to call someone a groomer on Twitter. Today Caraballo was made to account for their extremist rhetoric targeting judges.”

    https://twitter.com/MrAndyNgo/status/1602723204207886342

    https://ngo.locals.com/post/3202998/trans-activist-alejandra-caraballo-esqueer-asked-at-congressional-hearing-about-their-extremist-twee

    PWND

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      That kind of pwnage isn’t effective when the other side has no shame and doesn’t care. It might even help himher in their future career.

    • Rat on a train

      That’s different. The judges deserve the hate.

  27. Shpip

    Yesterday, I had someone complain about hearing Wham!’s Last Christmas so many times during the holiday season. So I wondered: who has the best version of the song?

    It turns out, there’s a list with 436 covers of Last Christmas, including versions by Gwen Stefani, LeAnn Rimes, Taylor Swift, the Cheetah Girls, Jimmy Eat World, Carly Rae Jepson, The Osmonds, Backstreet Boys, Meghan Trainor, Mary J. Blige, KC and the Sunshine Band, the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra w/ Ricky Martin, and of course, The Gentlemen of St. John’s College Cambridge. At roughly 4:30 per song, you could listen to “Last Christmas” for nearly 33 hours straight without hearing the same version twice!

    So who here wants to take one for the team and figure out which cover is best?

    • AlexinCT

      Is there a dirty rap version?

      • AlexinCT

        Cause “Bad Santa” is the best Christmas movie.

    • Sensei

      Perfect Glib article.

      • The Last American Hero

        Article? It should be a Glibpaper presented at Honey Harvest.

    • MikeS

      I heard that fucking Paul McCartney Christmas song the other day. I’m now ded.

      • Pat

        I’ve heard it twice over the Walmart PA this season. Still better than All I Want For Christmas Is You. Mariah Carrey is an untalented fucking hack. Sorry, kids.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Pat, what have you done. Wonderful Christmastime is the worst of the worst. Absolutely terrible.

        All I Want for Christmas is You is a banger.

      • Pat

        That may have been an overstatement, although I do loathe All I Want For Christmas Is You.

        In general I don’t really enjoy pop Christmas music. I’ll make an exception for Fairytale of New York, but they don’t play that anymore because of the word “faggot.”

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Mariah Carey was my first celebrity crush. Definitely no longer my first choice, but I guess I am a sucker for childhood nostalgia.

      • Pat

        I had never seen the music video before. Nice cameo.

      • Pat

        I don’t think there could possibly be a better of highlighting that typo. Thank you.

      • Pat

        *better way. I don’t think there’s a clever way of highlighting that typo.

      • Nephilium

        I block that terrible fucking song out of my head after every holiday season, only to be reminded of it, and have to deal with its terribleness again. On the bar crawl Saturday, I think we heard it four fucking times.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        JET! WOOOOHOHOHOOOHHOOHOOH!

      • slumbrew

        I’d buy that.

      • Tundra

        Is it worse than the Lennon abomination, though?

    • Pat

      “What’s the best type of cancer to get?”

      • Banjos

        Melanoma, it’s easiest to detect and has a high survivability rate.

      • Banjos

        Breast is a good second as it’s also easier to detect and that’s where all the research money is going.

      • AlexinCT

        The one someone else gets?

    • Drake

      Best? I hate that song. “Least worst” is the top price.

      Maybe a speed-metal version so it’s over quickly.

    • Count Potato

      I never heard of it.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        You never leave your house if Last Christmas has never entered your ears.

      • Count Potato

        Or maybe I’m just very good at ignoring things?

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Thicc head?

    • Not Adahn

      This one, obviously

      +1 hottie in a red dress tapdancing

  28. Certified Public Asshat

    A very stupid Twitter thread

    Say your name is Joe.

    You believe your name is Joe because that’s your name.

    I insist your name is Jean because I believe I have the right to name you because of who I understand myself to be, and you do not have the right to name yourself because of who I understand you to be.
    Let’s say this plays out in a number of other beliefs I have about your identity. Again and again, you establish yourself on your own terms; again and again I refuse your self, in a way that makes it clear my ability to accept or refuse you is a core part of how I see myself.
    Perhaps you’ve seen this scenario play out in thousands of different ways, and wondered: What is that?

    I’ll tell you what it is.
    It’s supremacy.
    It’s a belief that I am supreme.

    • juris imprudent

      I’m establishing my license to permit you to exist.

      How Cartesian, I refuse to permit you to exist and you vanish!?!

      • juris imprudent

        Listen, there would be fewer people in existence if I could refuse to permit them to exist!

      • Jarflax

        If I had this power there would be a lot of real estate looking for new occupants along the coasts, and Trump would be the leftwing candidate in 24

      • Lackadaisical

        This is getting graphic.

      • UnCivilServant

        Perhaps if we approached from another Axis.

      • Lackadaisical

        Just get to the point.

      • Pat

        That’s the way, stay on him. Don’t let him curve you.

      • juris imprudent

        I punned in the wrong vector.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I’m a duck!

      Deny it and you’re oppressing me!

      • juris imprudent

        Stop, you’re quacking me up.

      • Jarflax

        * looks up recipe for orange sauce and begins sharpening bleeding and pinning knives.

    • Pat

      Social Security Numbers are a social construct. You can choose to be identified by any Social Security Number you like. It doesn’t matter what Social Security Number you were assigned at birth, all that matters is what Social Security Number with which you choose to identify. If you choose to identify with a 14-digit Social Security Number and your employer insists on forcing you into the 9-digit Social Security Number paradigm, they are exercising supremacy and denying your lived experience.

      Related

    • Plisade

      Say your name is Joe.

      I believe your name is Joe because that’s what you just said.

      Then one day you tell me that your name is Josephine and you’re now a female. I say fine, you do you. But you get pissed off because you don’t get a rise out of me. You assert that I don’t understand you, but the truth is I simply don’t give a shit. You know this, and that’s what really bothers you.

      Let’s play this out in other ways. Again and again, you establish meaningless and fantastic ways to identify yourself: You say you’re proud to have 11 fingers, when I can see you only have 10; you say you’re a proud Native American, but you’re as lily white as my ass in winter. What is that?

      I’ll tell you what it is.
      It’s sanity.
      It’s knowing that there is an objective reality.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Say your name is Bruce, then one day you tell me that your name is Caitlin and you’re now a female. I say fine, you do you

        But I am still curious how you win woman of the year and avoid any scrutiny over that fatal car crash.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        That road is dangerous. I don’t get why Malibu is so popular.

    • juris imprudent

      I call your stupid Twitter thread and raise you a stupid NBC opinion piece.

      Travis Rieder, Ph.D, is the Assistant Director for Education Initiatives, Director of the Master of Bioethics degree program and Research Scholar at the Berman Institute of Bioethics.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        I reraise with a big contradiction:

        You have beliefs of your own in this scenario.
        You believe I am a supremacist asshole.
        It so happens you are correct.

        “Supremacist” because I believe I have supremacy over you, and “asshole” because that is an asshole thing to believe.

      • R C Dean

        What this shows, to me, is that all of the current leftism is based on a belief that the entire world is nothing more than a struggle for power over others. This, by the way, is what critical legal theory and its bastard child critical rac theory propose. It is a seductive Single Unifying Theory of Everything, as such theories tend to be.

        So the question is, who is supreme over who? Am I supreme over you because I insist on calling you by your former name, or are you supreme over me because you insist that I call you by a new name? Critical theory provides no basis for choosing who gets their way, here, as there is nothing but power dynamics.

        I tend to say that when I insist on saying what I want, that is not an exercise of power over you, but when you insist on controlling what I say, that is an exercise of power over me, but in the world of critical theory, there is no such thing as an action which isn’t an exercise of power over someone else.

      • juris imprudent

        It’s funny because the last of the true Marxists dismiss all of this because it strays so far from dialectical materialism, which is the heart of their belief.

      • R C Dean

        Two of my 1L teachers were founders of critical legal theory, so I got a good look at it in class. I had majored in philosophy, so I was better equipped to look at it than most of my peers. Two things struck me about it:

        (1) There was something to it, in the sense that looking at the law as a means for the powerful to maintain their position is not the least bit nuts. You can see the Marxist DNA (the profs were both Marxists to some degree), as it was an explanation for the durability of perceived class oppression.

        (2) Treating it is a universal solvent, a Single Unifying Theory of Everything, is a mistake, as the world is never that simple. But such theories are seductive because they simplify the world for you, and people love that.

        Now, when the doltish 2L, who was not doing well in law school, BTW, converted that to critical race theory, most of what value it had evaporated, and it became a self-licking ice cream cone of fail.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        current leftism is based on a belief that the entire world is nothing more than a struggle for power over others

        Exactly this.

        The postmodernists have successfully removed all objective truth from the political sphere. Without any pretense of objectivity for multiple parties to argue and eventually compromise over, the only metric left for resolving disputes is power.

      • R C Dean

        The success of leftism is mostly based on non-leftists continuing to act as though there is objectivity, facts, people of good faith, etc. so that compromise is possible. When that road runs out, shit is going to get red-in-tooth-and-claw real.

    • Not Adahn

      You mean “Coercively Assigned Joe At Birth.”

      • Certified Public Asshat

        A doctor assigned me male at birth. Is this science or anti-science?

        Please help Plato.

      • juris imprudent

        Parents are oppressive!

      • Lackadaisical

        Yes, they are. For your own good in oh so many ways.

  29. The Late P Brooks

    You have your ways to choke your chicken, I have mine.

    This is why I come here. And references to marking the door of your office with the blood of interns to keep the Angel of Layoffs away.

  30. hayeksplosives

    I follow James Woods on Twitter. He’s long been one of my favorite actors, and he really got my attention when it emerged that he’d reported the 9/11 hijackers doing a trial run of their scheme on a flight he was on a few weeks before the real thing. He has since doubled, tripled, and quadrupled down on government ineptitude and culture wars.

    Here he retweets someone else’s observations on the not-so-nice bits of our society.

    https://twitter.com/realjameswoods/status/1602724619512909824?s=46&t=oNxoDeGXfLCsxVEhP6obqg

    The 9/11 thing (published 9/19/2001)

    https://abcnews.go.com/amp/Entertainment/story?id=102372&page=1

    • SDF-7

      it emerged that he’d reported the 9/11 hijackers doing a trial run of their scheme on a flight he was on a few weeks before the real thing.

      What?!? (Seriously had not heard that… oh the bloody incompetence at best of the Feebs.)

      • Pat

        “At best” is doing a good bit of work there. I suspect 9/11 was a lot like 1/6, or the Whitmer kidnapping, or the “Draw Muhammad” shooting: The feebs orchestrate their own terror plot. Worst case scenario it goes bad, the terrorist event they orchestrated actually takes place, whether deliberately or because they’re that fucking incompetent, and they arrogate more power for themselves. Best case scenario it goes well ,and they give each other medals and bathe in fawning media coverage for “foiling” the plot their dupes had no chance of pulling off without the feebs providing the means and opportunity.

      • Count Potato

        That Las Vegas shooting still seems like a massive goat fuck.

      • slumbrew

        What Las Vegas shooting? There was no Las Vegas shooting.

  31. Shpip

    Something to give you a smile and a grunt of “I did not know that.”

    Driver Percy Gordon Hendy was serving on Gallipoli in November 1915 when he sent Christmas wishes to his family back home in Melbourne, written on a hard tack biscuit.

    On the back, Hendy wrote simply, ‘Gallipoli Nov, Wishing you all a Merry Xmas and a happy New Year, George.’

    More than 100 years later, the biscuit is on display in the First World War Galleries at the Australian War Memorial.

    Full story here.

    • R.J.

      …And it’s just as edible now as it was then.

    • hayeksplosives

      Awww.

      My Aussie friend told me this story yesterday (by email):

      My favorite Polish WW2 story is how the thermal batteries that powered the guidance systems in the V2 rockets were made by Polish prisoners of war, who secretly urinated into the propellant. This of course made the batteries as unreliable as hell, but ze Germans never figured it out. Probably would’ve been a lot more people killed by these rockets if not for the efforts of the Polish POWs.

    • SDF-7

      And if Greece and Turkey keep spitting at each other and draw NATO into it…. we can do it all again!

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Both are NATO members, that would be interesting.

      • Drake

        Pick teams? Skins vs. shirts?

    • grrizzly

      If you want to see live kangaroos in the wild, they are right behind the Australian War Memorial.

  32. Sensei

    Paywalled NYT is absolutely pandering to its readership. I love the chipper tone!

    It’s Time to Wear a Mask Again, Health Experts Say

    Masks are back, and, this time, they’re not just for Covid-19. A “tripledemic” of the coronavirus, influenza and respiratory syncytial virus, known as R.S.V., sweeping through the United States has prompted several cities and counties, including New York City and Los Angeles County, to encourage people to wear a mask in indoor public spaces once again.

    Rates of Covid-19, flu and R.S.V. “may be more intense or a little bit less intense in some parts of the country, but really, the entire country is being affected,” said Dr. William Schaffner, a professor of preventive medicine at the Vanderbilt University School of Medicine. As a result, he urged anyone who lives in a high-risk household to “put your mask back on” when in public spaces. High-risk households would include those with adults over the age of 65, pregnant women, people with a pre-existing condition such as heart disease, diabetes or lung disease and anyone who is immune-compromised.

    Dr. Helen Chu, an associate professor of allergy and infectious diseases at UW Medicine in Seattle, went a step further, recommending everyone mask while infection and hospitalization rates are so high. “I think it’s a good time to mask,” she said. “Given where we are right now with hospitals being at very close to capacity, especially in pediatric hospitals with R.S.V. and with flu, I think that anything that you can do to slow down community transmission is going to be helpful.”

    Realistically, not everyone in the United States — or a certain city — will wear a mask. In fact, you might find yourself the only person in a store or on a plane who’s wearing one. Don’t let that discourage you. For one thing, remember that no one is thinking about you as much as you think they are. In social psychology, this is called the spotlight illusion, said Gretchen Chapman, a professor of social and decision sciences at Carnegie Mellon University. “I may feel that everyone’s staring at me because I’m wearing a mask, but chances are that’s like the 11th thing on their list to worry about,” she said.

    What’s more, Dr. Chapman said, “There are lots of situations in life where we do something that makes us feel awkward, but if we think it’s important enough, we do it anyway.”

    • R.J.

      Replace the word “mask” with “codpiece” and that story becomes much more amusing.

      • Sensei

        “Tiger Repelling Rock”

      • Fatty Bolger

        We need something like the “millennials to snake people” plugin for this.

    • juris imprudent

      For one thing, remember that no one is thinking about you as much as you think they are.

      Fails to appeal to raging narcissism of NYT readers.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      High-risk households would include those with adults over the age of 65, pregnant women, people with a pre-existing condition such as heart disease, diabetes or lung disease and anyone who is immune-compromised.

      Are those groups ever low risk

    • slumbrew

      ” In fact, you might find yourself the only person in a store or on a plane who’s wearing one. Don’t let that discourage you.”

      But I was assured that masks protect other people, not yourself. I guess that’s why I’m not some big-brain professor.

    • Lackadaisical

      “Masks are back”

      Nope, go die in a gutter you communist.

  33. Scruffy Nerfherder

    *the face you make when javascript executes differently on Mac and Windows*

    • kinnath

      Write once; debug everywhere.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Fortunately or unfortunately, it isn’t my code that’s failing.

        But it’s breaking my customizations…. arrrrgh

    • SDF-7

      “The face I make when I have to code anywhere near JavaScript” is more like it. Blech. Give me x64 assembly any day.

  34. DEG

    “This is going to be a surveillance study using—working with some of our medical examiners in Florida. We’re also going to be working with the University of Florida so there will be a component that has more of a research or research forum to it, but we will answer this question.

    Why do I get the feeling that this investigation will be shanked?

    Under military law, officers are prohibited from engaging in conduct that “disgraces them personally or brings dishonor to the military profession.”

    The men involved could be found guilty of violating Article 134, which covers “conduct of a nature to bring discredit upon the armed forces.” The photos could also be found to be in violation of Article 133, which covers “conduct unbecoming an officer.”

    There are a range of potential punishments. Even though @PupRavage has retired, he could be brought back to active duty to be court-martialed or re-retired at a lower rank.

    Prediction: “We investigated ourselves and determined that procedures were followed.”

    • Fourscore

      Sounds like the old days at Happy Hour, Officer’s Club

  35. Count Potato

    “A brief selection of positions from our cherished Fourth Estate: This entire story is a “dud” (The Washington Post) — no bombshells here! (Forbes). The Twitter Files, in which a handful of committed partisans enthusiastically censor large swaths of the conservative base, including a former president, actually prove the company was not politically biased. It is, however, now biased against Democrats (New York Magazine). Elon’s exposĂŠ is a flop that doesn’t matter. It has also placed multiple “trust and safety experts” in mortal danger (The Verge, predictably). Then, my favorite: it is good to finally see the blacklist tools I have been curious about for many years, which we have by the way always known existed, and therefore don’t matter (The Atlantic).

    The charge of shadow banning evoked uniquely loud jeering from the press, including Charlie Warzel in particular, a man formerly of the position “Twitter isn’t shadow banning Republicans.” Now, in the face of evidence the company absolutely shadow banned Republicans, the official position is we are using the term “shadow ban” incorrectly.”

    https://www.piratewires.com/p/the-fifth-estate

    • juris imprudent

      in mortal danger

      Then that is a very defective safety expert.

    • Lackadaisical

      ” It has also placed multiple “trust and safety experts” in mortal danger”

      If only.

    • whiz

      It’s not shadow banning, it’s penumbra banning.

  36. The Late P Brooks

    “I think it’s a good time to mask,” she said. “Given where we are right now with hospitals being at very close to capacity, especially in pediatric hospitals with R.S.V. and with flu, I think that anything that you can do to slow down community transmission is going to be helpful.”

    Maybe R C Dean can help me out, here. Hospitals should want to run at full capacity.

    just as an illustration, the last few passengers on an airplane are essentially pure profit. Once the cost of getting the plane from A to B have been covered, you start to make money. Variable costs of treating patients are obviously different, but you still don’t want a big expensive building full of high priced employees sitting around gathering dust. Why else have hospitals been disappearing over the past couple of decades?

    Hospital administrators should be out there releasing viruses in crowded public spaces to get revenue up.

    • Sensei

      + 1 Certificate of Need.

      You need a rather high baseline of occupied ICU beds to have a profitable department. There is nothing evil about that. Constraining competition to accomplish that is another story…

    • Nephilium

      Membership is at capacity!

    • R.J.

      Wow.

    • Pat

      Lysenko could probably help her with some lesson plans that use goodthinkful metaphors for cellular metabolism.

  37. The Other Kevin

    People want to make that hockey thing a transgender issue, but in my experience it’s just a matter of personal responsibility. Sled hockey is full contact so you are allowed to hit, just not with the front of your sled, not in the head, not a few feet from the boards, and similar things that can be dangerous. Teams are divided mostly by skill so they’re completely coed and there are different sized players on each team. It is up to the individual to make sure they aren’t playing in an unsafe way.

    Personal example: I only weigh about 130, and at one time I had two teammates who weighed about 220. During summer practice one of them, a newer player, and I were chasing a puck near the boards. I was a few inches from the boards, and he slammed into me at full speed. Messed up my shoulder pretty bad and it took almost 2 years to completely heal. The other 220 player has played longer than I have. He’ll go full force into other players his size, but he knows how to hit smaller players like me with just enough force to knock me over. There’s no point in smashing into someone and causing an injury.

    • Lackadaisical

      At least not someone in your team. 😛

      • The Other Kevin

        That’s definitely part of it.

    • Sensei

      Sadly unavailable at work.

      I’m guessing the short wheelbase and front weight bias are going to make the AMX seem like a handling dream.

  38. UnCivilServant

    While it sounds like an oxymoron, we just had a productive meeting. The key was it was only three people, all of whome had worked together for years, looking at a single problem. So all of the common clutter that fills meetings didn’t crop up.

  39. Certified Public Asshat

    AOC climate change documentary earns only $80 per theater despite rave critic reviews

    “To the End is set to ignite more Americans to take action,” RogertEbert.com’s Nick Allen wrote in his review.

    The documentary debuted on more than 120 screens over the weekend but garnered less than $10,000 dollars across all theaters, coming in 33rd place overall at the box office.

    Several Oscar-bait films lauded during film festivals have struggled to excel in theaters this year, with critics attributing the audience drop-off to the rise in streaming platforms, audiences’ increasing distrust in critic scores, and topics that do not interest a large swathe of the public.

    The latter factor may have been the largest contributor to the film’s meager earnings, with climate change documentaries in the last several years failing to draw in a substantial audience.

    Audiences do not want to date her.

    • Fatty Bolger

      “Less than $10,000”, I wonder how much less. Even at $10K, that’s $83.33 per screen, or about 9-10 tickets.

      • R C Dean

        And that’s per screen, not per showing.

        I smell another money laundering op.

    • Pat

      despite rave critic reviews

      An odd correlation, to be sure.

    • Lackadaisical

      “despite rave critic reviews”

      Despite or partially because of?

      “audiences’ increasing distrust in critic scores”

      Wonder why. Must be the audience’s fault.

      • Nephilium

        We should find a better class of audience.

    • juris imprudent

      That’s deader than she was on Jan 6th.

  40. The Late P Brooks

    I’m guessing the short wheelbase and front weight bias are going to make the AMX seem like a handling dream.

    You might not want to just fling it into turn one at COTA.

  41. Count Potato

    “Anti-LGBTQ hate has increased on Twitter since Elon Musk officially acquired the company

    Media Matters has found that prominent anti-LGBTQ accounts’ “groomer” rhetoric has exploded in reach since Musk’s takeover – retweets of their use of the slur have increased over 1200%

    Anti-LGBTQ accounts that saw substantial increases in both retweets of and mentions in tweets with the slur included Tim Pool, Jack Posobiec, Jake Shield, Gays Against Groomers, Blaire White, Allie Beth Stuckey, Andy Ngo, Seth Dillon, and Mike Cernovich. ”

    https://www.mediamatters.org/twitter/anti-lgbtq-hate-has-increased-twitter-elon-musk-officially-acquired-company

    OFFS!!

    • UnCivilServant

      So this person is asserting all alphabet people are groomers, therefore an increase in calling out child grooming is hate against all alphabet people?

      What a bigot.

    • kinnath

      Decades of trying to convince people that “gay/lesbian” was not automatically “pedophile” has been wiped out in the last year or so.

      • The Other Kevin

        Yep. The crazies hitch themselves to someone else’s wagon and ruin the whole thing. Gay people and women hardest hit.

      • Lackadaisical

        Except it’s not just that they hitched their wagon it’s that so many of the LGBT (our residents excluded of course) didn’t say “NO! these people aren’t like us”. Many in the activist and left wing openly courted this.

    • rhywun

      The fact that their list of people espousing “anti-LGBTQ hate” includes a bunch of “LGBTQ” people ought to clue them in to something.

    • Tundra

      Just wait, groomers.

    • R C Dean

      Just ignore that pre-Musk Twitter didn’t ban accounts that posted pedo content, just deleted some of their pedo content. And that when Musk started banning those accounts, he found tens of thousands of them almost immediately. Oh,and that the guy in charge of “trust and safety” was pretty clearly pedo-curious, at a minimum.

      Clearly, accusing people on Twitter of being groomers is totally unfounded.

      • Count Potato

        “he found tens of thousands of them almost immediately.”

        And a large number of them were Antifa.

      • Sean

        Shocker.

  42. The Late P Brooks

    Not real journalism

    Musk and his allies promote these tweet threads — dubbed the “Twitter Files” — as bombshell revelations proving that Twitter intentionally muzzled conservatives because of their political views. That’s a long-running claim by Republicans who are convinced social media companies censor them, despite ample evidence to the contrary. Twitter’s internal researchers, for example, have found its algorithms favor right-leaning political content.

    But many tech journalists, social media experts and former Twitter employees say Musk’s claims are over-hyped, given that the documents shared so far largely corroborate what is already known about the messy business of policing a large social network.

    ——-

    Musk has given exclusive access to a small group of independent journalists including Matt Taibbi, formerly of Rolling Stone, and Bari Weiss, a former New York Times opinion columnist, under the condition they first post about the documents on Twitter.

    The selection of Taibbi and Weiss, who both share Musk’s criticisms of the mainstream media and what they see as progressive censoriousness, has itself caused controversy. Other news outlets have not been given access to the original documents, which have been presented only in screenshots and excerpts in lengthy tweet threads, often without context.

    NPR haz a sad.

    • Fatty Bolger

      Matt Taibbi, formerly of Rolling Stone, and Bari Weiss, a former New York Times opinion columnist

      Couple of wingnuts, no wonder they found bias.

    • Not Adahn

      That’s a long-running claim by Republicans who are convinced social media companies censor them, despite ample evidence to the contrary. Twitter’s internal researchers, for example, have found its algorithms favor right-leaning political content.

      Twitter investigated Twitter, and Twitter demonstratively proved that Twitter is unbiased!

      • R.J.

        We found ONE!

    • AlexinCT

      Our narrative!

      /Whiney crying…

    • Pat

      Twitter’s internal researchers, for example, have found its algorithms favor right-leaning political content.

      The USSR’s internal researchers, for example, have found its food distribution programs favor Ukrainians…

      • Lackadaisical

        Just look at all the grain or reports say there is.

        Now just go ahead and ignore the starving children, it’s all right here in the report proving there’s plenty of food.

    • Lackadaisical

      “often without context.”

      This is a real shame, no one is flying interference for forget Twitter employees to cover up what they were up to. They’re just mad they don’t get to control the narrative alone.

    • rhywun

      NPR readership’s biases confirmed. Film at 11.

  43. The Late P Brooks

    The Twitter Files might not be the bombshell Musk teased in popcorn emoji-laden tweets — but they offer an illuminating glimpse into the sausage-making of content moderation.

    They show Twitter executives and rank and file employees grappling with difficult tradeoffs, questioning the company’s rules and how they should be applied — and in some cases, getting things wrong.

    Heroism is hard.

    • R.J.

      I am waiting for the bombshell that shows how the government propped up Twitter with cash payments. Unless the best forensic data cleaners worked on those books, Elon will find proof of this.

  44. The Late P Brooks

    On Tuesday, Dorsey weighed in on the Twitter Files, saying the company had made errors in how it approached content moderation.

    “I continue to believe there was no ill intent or hidden agendas, and everyone acted according to the best information we had at the time,” he wrote. “Of course mistakes were made.”

    Nobody’s perfect.

    • Fatty Bolger

      Just like when the IRS seemed to be going after tea party organizations. Sure, mistakes were made, but it was purely accidental, and everybody was acting in good faith. Which they could totally have proven, if a bunch of hard drives hadn’t mysteriously crashed and been destroyed.

  45. Tundra

    WTF?

    The latest Ukraine propaganda is fucking weird.

    The third chick is pretty solid, though.

    • AlexinCT

      They will cast a spell on you that will make you fall of stairs and shit your pants!

    • Not Adahn

      Is this tied into them shutting down churches?

      • Tundra

        Good question. Seems pretty hot on the heels of that.

    • Drake

      Reports have them losing something like a thousand men a day in Bakhmut while posting nonsense.

    • slumbrew

      That was mentioned in the morning dedthread.

      Lucky-ass dopes.

    • R.J.

      That was freaky. I prepare better when I go for a walk around the block.

  46. The Late P Brooks

    Juicing the numbers

    Long Covid leaves some people with long-term symptoms, but it can be deadly, too. It played a part in at least 3,544 deaths in the United States in the first 30 months of the Covid-19 pandemic, a new report says.

    The report is the first official attempt by the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s National Center for Health Statistics to quantify the number of long Covid deaths in the United States.

    Some experts say this finding is probably a significant undercount, considering that up to 30% of people who get Covid-19 go on to have long-term symptoms, according to the CDC.

    The most pernicious and deadly plague ever!

  47. slumbrew

    WTF is up with the use of “learnings” instead of “lessons”?

    Stupid corp-speak.

    • Drake

      Your attitude is problematic.

  48. The Late P Brooks

    WTF is up with the use of “learnings” instead of “lessons”?

    Stupid corp-speak.

    That’s hillbilly-speak.

    “I’ll learn you to backsass your elders.”

    • Lackadaisical

      Right? Sounds downright backwoods. Idjits.