“I got them jugs!” Bryon yelled as he chased Kristi through the house, his enormous breasts swaying queasily. “Fuck off, Byron!’ Kristi yelled, picking up a sugar bowl and throwing it at his head. She missed and it bounced off of his watermelon breasts. “Look at...
Top US Fema official claims to have teleported to a Waffle House before A far-right conspiracy theorist turned high-ranking official at the US Federal Emergency Management Agency (Fema) claims to have once teleported to a Waffle House. Gregg Phillips, who in December...
“Are you ready for this?” Dark Cracky asked. Hunter jerked awake and sat up a little straighter. “I’m fine, I can do it..” “You are going to have to go out there and talk, right? Like, in front of people, no editing.” “Leave him alone,” Cracky said. “He’s doing the...
The Beast That Shouted Joy at the Butthole of the World
“They are just going to keep trying until they kill you, Donald,” the hat said, as grave and serious as he ever managed to be. “Barron will be alone,” the hair said, agreeing. “He will grow up without a father.” “They fear me being President again,” Donald said. “They...
…and mean everything to me.
Get up on that old Dick, y’all.
Were you praying at the Lares’ shrine?
“I’m tired of laying low,” the hat said. “We should be out there mixing it up, getting in street fights, insulting our enemies, blood and fire in the streets!” “It's a different election this time around,” the hair said. “Lying low is the best bet here. Kamala’s...
Shoot to kill or die
Puppy Love
“Imagine a hyena-cackle, raping your eardrums–forever.”
“Cracky?”
“Yes, Hunter?”
“I want to smoke you!”
And then Hunter walked on down the hall.
Please note my new bio.
Midnight in the Garden of Stupid and Evil
I have reached Dead Sea levels of saltiness today.
YAS, KWEEN!
Joemala: Episode 222
“You have to wear the hat, Vance,” Donald insisted. “It doesn’t fit my head,” J. D. said. “He doesn’t want to wear the hat?” the hair asked. “This is bullshit. I have to wear the hat. You jam that damn thing on top of me all the time.” “Don’t put me on him,” VEEP hat...
Götterdroolerung
filled with terrible purpose
Clean. Very clean.
As Above, So Below
You treat me like a dog / Get me down on my knees
One Bad Night (Episode 220)