He’ll die doing what he does best: losing to the Buckeyes.

The Olympics, which has already started, opens today. Wait, what? Why is the opening ceremony not opening the games? Not that anybody will be there, so it doesn’t really matter. The stadium will be empty because everybody running this thing is shit-scared. This man apparently has a death wish. RIP, bitch. These guys understand risk assessment. So naturally they’ll be called stupid by the sheeple. And Boston College did right by somebody. Do these people not freaking understand that natural immunity is a thing and that vaccinating a person who has developed it is a needless risk? Apparently not.  Oh, the Yankees also found a new way to shit the bed against their biggest rival. Which is hilarious.  And that’s sports.

Drysdale giving tips to a young up-n-comer.

German actor Emil Jannings was born on this day.  The kraut shares it with Ethiopian emperor Halie Selassie, TV announcer Arthur Treacher (does anybody remember his fish-n-chips shops growing up? I do.), baseball great Pee-Wee- Reese, test pilot Peter Twiss, javelin thrower Cy Young, SC justice Anthony Kennedy, pitcher Don Drysdale, shock jock Don Imus, former Malaysian PM Najib Razak, Depeche Mode’s Martin Gore, actor Woody Harrelson, G-n-R guitarist Slash, drug addicted actor Philip Seymour Hoffman, bluegrass great Alison Kraus, fuck rag Monica Lewinsky, football great Terry Glenn, (possibly racist) dog Schottzie Schott, and Harry Potter actor Daniel Radcliffe.

Not an awful list. But now it’s time to move on to…the links!

We’re never getting out, are we? But wait, it gets worse. We’ve left behind those who definitely deserve a chance to escape. Nice fucking job, government. Real nice.

It’s free, so why not take it? Oh wait, because you’re a shitbag, that’s why. The same goes for people sitting on their ass collecting enhanced unemployment benefits when there’s plenty of work out there.

It’s a metaphor.

This is perhaps the best long-term scam in American history. But don’t worry. They’re “essential”.

Wow, these people really wanted their vaccines. Oh wait, the media is actually telling the truth now. Let’s see what happens next. I think it will become a bloodbath, but I hope I’m wrong.

So I guess he was right? Sadly, he chose the wrong time and place to explain his decision.

Wait, why is he being charged? Based on what I’ve seen, he deserves a medal. Streets are for cars, not mobs.

This lady understands science better than Chicago pols or the teachers union who runs that city.

Chicago Public Schools doubles down on being retarded. Let’s be honest here: anything short of the stupidest decision possible would be a surprise from these cretins.

The same could be said of Texas, Arizona, Utah, Idaho, and just about anywhere else. Please, stay away unless you’re leaving your failed politics at the door.

CRIPPLE FIGHT!!!!!!!!! You know, because neither one has won anything of note in…forever. But it’s gonna be fun to watch this shot show unfold as a local outsider.

I won’t know what this feels like for the next several days. Although it’s a lovely song.  Enjoy it.

And get out there and have a great Friday and an even better weekend, friends!