(featured image on main page, “Burrata Salad,” meal and photo by SP)

It hit me the other day that I haven’t actually been single for 30 years. So there’s going to be a lot of re-acclimation and a recognition that a lot has fundamentally changed since then.

To wit: SP left behind a lot of gadgets, things she was particularly fond of. We couldn’t turn lights on or off with a switch, it had to be with an app. Remote cameras, lights, the TV, whatever, all gadgetized. I’m reverting a lot of that back to old fashioned because it sorta makes sense to my old brain to use actual physical controls for lights, fridge, climate control, soap… But one gadget I’m keeping is this Apple Watch. Besides the Dick Tracy vibe, I’ve found a lot of the features more useful than I imagined I would. Answering the phone, seeing messages, all quite nice. I really like the Fitness function, which measures physical activity and shows you progress toward your daily goal.

But let me give the single guys (and frankly most of you married guys) a tip that is peculiar to: take the watch off before you crank the hog. Otherwise, you’ll get the creepy reminder, “It looks like you’re working out. Do you want track the physical activity?”

With that tasteless observation, we move on to Birthdays, and today is one of the days when they’re mostly junk. But amongst the dross are a few nuggets, like a guy who would make a great son; a legend who actually gave me seed money for one of my businesses; a guy Spud wanted to be when he grew up; a guy who could not tell a lie; a guy with a dynamic personality; a dude who liked ’em pale but didn’t get a vasectomy in time; a guy who parlayed his family fortune into some decent beer; and a guy who wrote a couple decent songs.

Links will be better, I promise. And a promise from an old Jew, you can trust. Emmis.

 

I love the fact that anyone thinks we’re going to believe this.

 

“You’re a great audience…. FOR ME TO POOP ON!”

 

I just can’t imagine being this desperate for attention. But I’m not a politician.

 

“We’re all pretty ignorant, so this seems like a good way to plug up innovation.”

 

I’m amazed that calling your boss names and asserting that you will not let him have any say in how you do their work will get you fired.

 

In a world full of negativity and bad news, it’s delightful when there’s heartwarming stories like this.

 

Old Guy Music may be my favorite composition (and definitely my favorite song to play) from one of today’s Birthday Boys.