I’m so hot I need a $3K bodyguard — men won’t stop flirting with me

 

 

She needs protection for her perfection.

An Arizona woman says she’s considering hiring a bodyguard because men won’t stop hitting on her at the gym.

Monica Hudlt works out five days a week but often experiences unwanted attention at the hands of fellow gym junkies who fawn over her flawless physique.

“I would happily pay $3,000 a month for someone who does a good job and can scare people off,” Hudlt told the Daily Star, saying her male minder would simply have to accompany her to the gym and to photoshoots.

“Working out and exercising is super important to me as I do it not just for my physical health but my mental well-being,” she additionally explained. “I get hit on at the gym at least once every time I go so it can get a bit draining.”

What draws the men so thickly, My Lady?
Thy lizard skin? The swole of barren hips?
Or, mayhaps, the mooseknuckle that peeks,
Like a sly promise of buttal delights?


 

How many stoves did she have in her house? One for every room and two in the john? (John was the older guy who lived downstairs, and paid her to pee in his mouth.)


 

Woman Who Says She Went on Date With Idaho Killer Suspect: ‘Always Listen to Your Gut’

A woman named Hayley is sharing her story of a date she went on with Bryan Kohberger, the 28-year-old man now suspected of killing four University of Idaho students at their apartment last year.

In a TikTok first posted over the weekend, Hayley, @yellllyahhhh, referenced comments she’d written under an article in her local newspaper earlier this month about her Tinder date with Kohberger “over 7 years ago.” Since the comments she made, she said “a lot of people have been trying to dox me, specifically on Reddit, but I never thought the comments I made on Ho Bott News would make it to TikTok or Reddit or literally anything.”

According to Hayley, her interactions with Kohberger were “very brief.” They matched on Tinder, talked for a couple hours, and went on a movie date, but she says “he completely changed” when they got back to her dorm and he “invited himself inside.” She claimed he “was very pushy when it came to coming back in my dorm with me. But I didn’t get like scary vibes or anything from that. I just thought he was a stage five clinger because he said he wanted to spend more time with me.” At her dorm, Kohberger “kept trying to touch me,” prompting her to ask him, “Why are you touching me, what are you doing?”

At this point, Hayley claimed that Kohberger “got super serious” and denied touching her altogether: “He’s like, ‘I’m not,’ and I’m like, ‘you are, though,’ and he’s like, ‘I’m not touching you,’ kind of trying to gaslight me into thinking that he didn’t touch me, which is weird.” When she excused herself to go to the dorm bathroom, she says Kohberger followed her and waited outside. She eventually lied to him that she was throwing up in order to get him to leave. “It wasn’t because I was scared of him or thought he would hurt me if I asked him to leave. It was just mostly because I’m socially awkward, I didn’t know how to ask him to leave,” Hayley concluded.

After he left, Hayley claimed Kohberger texted her that she had “good birthing hips,” and they didn’t speak or see each other again. Speaking to the New York Post on Tuesday, Hayley noted that Kohberger “was not even the creepiest or scariest Tinder date I’ve been on.”

Mother, May I Tinder With Danger?: A Lifetime Movie Channel Special Event.

“He’s like, ‘I’m not,’ and I’m like, ‘you are, though,’ and he’s like, ‘I’m not touching you,’ kind of trying to gaslight me into thinking that he didn’t touch me, which is weird.”

We don’t even have to get a script doctor in to polish the dialogue.

But who to cast as the voice of her gut?


 

The song appeared on the Modern Girls (1986) soundtrack and the video is a tie-in product. Not a terrible movie, but mostly forgotten. Stars Clayton Rohner, who has many TV show appearances in his filmography, but fans of 80s movies probably know him best as the love interest in Just One of the Guys (1985) and April Fool’s Day (1986)–which also starred the luscious Deborah Foreman from Valley Girl (1983).

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