Every once in a while it all comes together.

This is my review of Arizona Wilderness Pecan Pie Brown Ale:

I don’t always get Gen Z, and quite frankly they don’t always get me but in some sense have they gone too far?  Perhaps I won’t reveal it just yet but first take a short step back.

The gallon of water guy:  this is the guy at the gym carrying around a gallon of water.  Chances are it’s not just tap water, but it certainly looks that way.  My first exposure to such a person was actually an older Gen X fellow from Texas; a retired E-6 working as a civilian contractor.  He had a penchant for eating protein bars and NO Xplode, which meant he needed to drink a ton of water.  I also found him one day taking a nap on an inversion table in the airfield vault. If you are unfamiliar with what an airfield vault is, lets just say its not a good place to wake up disoriented, grabbing around high voltage equipment controlled by a guy working in the tower who finds it funny he electrocuted another Airman.

B.O.R.G. Image search. Not unsettling at all.

At any rate, he carried around a one gallon jug of water.  Everywhere.  Even while working out of the bucket truck, which meant it was taking up space in the bucket.  He was also a huge fan of Chelsea FC—adjust your assumptions accordingly.

In this light, I introduce to you the B.O.R.G.  No, this is not a reference to the ultimate 1990’s manifestation of communism in a personified form, Star Trek bros.  Its an acronym meaning “Black Out Rage Gallon” and is composed of exactly 3 ingredients:  vodka, water, fruity flavoring/coloring.  Some go above and beyond on behalf of the plants with a flavor agent that contains electrolytes, however this is not necessary.  Perhaps its just the latest example of high society’s infatuation with rednecks in the midst?

So if you see these people just know, they’re crazy because they’re getting blackout drunk, not because their pre-workout just kicked in.  Damn kids.

 

At least I can look at their weird, fruity jugs with a sense of disdain while I drink… pie flavored beer. Okay there’s no leg for me to stand on here.  This is a bit on the sweet side, but not enough for me to hit the dreaded white girl beer alarm.  Its nutty, but in the same vein as other “nut brown” ales but also has hints of maple syrup and vanilla.  Drink it when everyone else in the room prefers pumpkin pie and you’re the family outcast that likes pecan.  Arizona Wilderness Pecan Pie Brown Ale:  3.1/5