Vampire Ecstasy

Yeah, baby! Notice how this poster is all wide and skinny, like it fit on a condom machine…

Vampire Ecstasy

Short subject: Don’t Be A Sucker

So it was Thursday night.  I was talking potential future movies and brought up Vampire Happening to Ted S, who then told me the movie he really wanted was The Happening.  The sad truth is, the movie I was looking for was another film.  At least it started with Vampire, I got that part right.  It was Vampire Ecstasy, an utterly shameless soft-core vampire film from the 1970s. This movie opens with gratuitous booby groping and goes down hill from there.  I figured I would post it while I was on the last road trip of summer to give you hooligans something to poke fun at. This film is also known as Plaything of the Devil, and it got famous enough to have a documentary made about it entitled Making of ‘Vampire Ecstasy’ which I was unable to locate on short notice. Probably a hoot.

As I have read in other reviews, this is not a scary movie at all.  Just a late night booby movie, which never even made it to cable.   Some trivia: This movie was shot in 21 days.  I’m surprised it took that long!  Gilbert Gottfried would have had a field day with this on USA’s Up All Night.

Now, about our short subject.  It’s pretty good.  Notice how the description of Nazi Germany mirrors the whole anti-racist movement today. Enjoy your black pill!

I lost a Sunday so I was not able to pull together anything else before I jumped back on the road.  So watch!  Or Don’t!  Everything is voluntary until a soft core porn vampire bites your…

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About The Author

R.J.

Hello. My name is R.J. I am a Tulpa with extra cheese and sour cream.

108 Comments

  1. Common Tater

    You’re like Willie Nelson.

    • R.J.

      In that I am at Schlitterbahn singing country music? Or that I spend an excessive time on the road?

        • R.J.

          Sadly none of the above. I may eat and go to bed. Eight hours of a water park is all can do in a day. I checked in because movie night is one of my God given rights which was sadly left out of the Bill of Rights.

      • Common Tater

        The chronic? 🙂

  2. Gender Traitor

    Up All Night was awesome! I didn’t see the whole movie, but I caught the “one-man fight scene” from Evil Dead 2: Dead Before Dawn and thought it was just about the funniest thing I’d ever seen! 🤣

    • R.J.

      I miss Gilbert, and that whole time of shared experience on nationwide networks. That time is gone, never to come back.

      • rhywun

        I do too but I also like having full experience of before and after. I pity the fools who have no knowledge of The Way Things Used to Be.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Maybe if you were a Richie Rich with cable….

  3. UnCivilServant

    Is it Thursday? I thought it was friday.

    Darnit, I have work tomorrow.

    • R.J.

      Man, I am so glad I took half a week off. Been swimming almost all day. When I get back to the cabin I will swim some more.

  4. Tonio

    Oh, my…

    • R.J.

      I was a bad friend and didn’t check for any man booty in this. I’ll make it up to you next week with “Kung Fu Wonder Child” which has gratuitous naked Mandarin man ass being caned. Deal?

      • R.J.

        Oh, and kiss your Family Friendly rating goodbye. Again.

      • Brochettaward

        I would consider the posting of such a movie a complete betrayal. Shitty b-movies are about the tits and ass.

        • R.J.

          It has that too. Completely nuts film I found out of left field.

        • rhywun

          Men have tits and asses too, you know.

          • Chafed

            He knows.

    • R.J.

      Excellent. There was a video channel, I think it was Nude Tube, that would have it. That’s some big cuts. Thanks for researching! I had almost no time this week.

      • LCDR_Fish

        I always use that site for double checking which version to buy/import- although it still misses some titles.

        I wound up importing a copy of the Japanese Blu ray for French Connection since I could get it via proxy shipping from a store over there much cheaper than any US release since they announced the digital edits.

        • LCDR_Fish

          And speaking of earlier J-splatter discussions this week – it looks like there is a sequel to Meatball Machine. May pick that one up next Amazon order for the hell of it.

          • R.J.

            Nice! Is there a release date? Has it been out for a while?

            • LCDR_Fish

              Been out for a couple years I think

  5. Nerfherder (Non-Non-Man)

    Trashy 70’s softcore

    I probably rented this as a teenager

    • Common Tater

      Requiem For A Vampire isn’t bad.

      • Zwak , “There is infinite amount of hope in the universe… just not for us.”

        Fang to Fang?

    • R.J.

      It was another film caught up in copyright hell until the 90’s. Shame. This would have been a big hit in the 80s rental market.

  6. LCDR_Fish

    Dammit – this is what I get for being 2 days behind in reading Glib posts.

    The line from Cryptonomicon goes pretty much like: “Filipinos are a warm, caring people – which is a good thing because so many of them carry concealed weapons.”

  7. Common Tater

    I know it wasn’t so easy in 1973, but are they going to use a flanger on every fucking sound?

    • Common Tater

      OK, I’m starting to think it’s a defect with the version I have.

      • R.J.

        There are all kinds of screwy issues with import films. Would not be surprised. Only Kung Fu films beat eurotrash imports for jacked up dubbing and soundtracks.

  8. Brochettaward

    People part of the Borg mind means actually believing that Doctor Who is a 9 year old black girl at heart.

    • Mojeaux

      Wait, what?! HE’S NOT?!!?!?!

      • MikeS

        Don’t you mean she’s not?

        • Mojeaux

          Oh. Her.

          • MikeS

            But her tardis.

      • Brochettaward

        Doctor Who has always been a young black girl. It’s just as it’s original creators intended.

  9. LCDR_Fish

    Tundra – just saw your post in dedthread. Ready Reserves is where I am. Hadn’t seen anything so far – just a lot of EUCOM billet advertisements – this may be an effort to fill those gaps (I applied for a different billet in Japan for next yr but probably won’t be selected). Of course that announcement was today. May ping my CO to see if he’s heard anything- shouldn’t impact my unit unless folks get voluntold.

    • dbleagle

      It is a PSRC. Back during the Iraq and Afghan boogies they were mobilizing Reserves to backfill AC positions so those people were available for the Theaters. Good luck you don’t end up in Syria or Iraq as a “dirt sailor”. I saw plenty of those unhappy people.

      • LCDR_Fish

        Reserves got rid of all of those last year per CNO….if this is restricted to EUCOM billets that’s an improvement but we’ll see.

    • Tundra

      Thank you brother. Always good to get translation from native speakers!

  10. LCDR_Fish

    Donny – good article earlier. Definitely the kind of thing I’d be interested in too. I built a 7.62×39 AK-AR 2 yrs back (80% lower) with help from a work buddy – but even though he did a test firing for safety, I *still* haven’t found anyplace local to fire (not on private land).

    Will ping more VA glibs but I may try one of the forest service hunting zero ranges near Culpeper in Sep.

  11. LCDR_Fish

    Re the Chinese rocket and navy mentions yesterday.

    I note the Chinese methane rocket article said “successful flight plan” but not that they actually did a full recovery a la SpaceX. Probably still a ways away from that.

    Re Naval shipbuilding – I think I’ve mentioned it before – and I may go digging for info when I get back to the office – but in spite of cranking out a ton of ships I’ve heard almost nothing about sailor training – for weapons or damage control or anything else. We’ve seen Russia ships with fire stations painted over and unusable (but looked pretty). Also – most US ships need to hit a drydock every 5 years (not counting pierside maintenance several times a year – very intensive to keep up just our normal ships much less x spanking new ships. They may steal our tech but that doesn’t mean they’re still working as intended 2 yrs after commissioning. Ideally.

  12. Timeloose

    Thanks for the earlier advice on my dog everyone.

    • Tundra

      Hope it helped.

      It probably makes me a raging asshole, but losing people outside of my immediate peeps doesn’t kick my ass like losing my dogs.

      All the best, TL

      • Timeloose

        Same. It’s appreciated

      • Chafed

        Not at all. Most dogs are better than most people.

  13. Brochettaward

    I’m going to First in your orifice.

    • MikeS

      💩

  14. LCDR_Fish

    Don’t recall who else is a retro synthwave fan here but Gunship just announced their next album. First single looks like a banger. https://youtu.be/l_ulVpYs6vg

  15. Tres Cool

    Hey from Concord, CA (proper) and the shittiest AirBNB I’ve seen yet. The ad boasted SEVEN bedrooms- spoiler! It used to be a “rest home”. If you want the address of a place to avoid, email me. They’re getting 0 stars. The place (building) has 2 a/c, but one of them doesnt work. Consequently, the back of the house (building) is 60 deg, and the rest is 82.
    Luckily, in a few days, I get back to the (on Zillow) $1.1M house in Pittsburg, CA.

    We’ve been working 60-hour weeks in the refinery. But ideally I get back to OH in a week, for a week off.

    Your man afield-

    Tres Cool

    PS- I did have fun flirting with my Safeway cashier today.

    • Zwak , “There is infinite amount of hope in the universe… just not for us.”

      If you are looking for something “fun” to do, take the bridge north of Concord, and look to your right. You can see the mothball fleet floating along. Other than that, I got nothin’ for the 580 corridor.

      • Tres Cool

        Im working in Martinez.

  16. Tres Cool

    PPS- the bed I have feels like a hefty bag full of puddin’.

    • R C Dean

      Isn’t that the way you like it?

      • Tres Cool

        Not when its under me.

        • Chafed

          Thank you for identifying the Glib with the strongest hips.

  17. Gustave Lytton

    Staying in a new hotel. Luckily it’s just for one night and im not paying for it. Small pseudo boutique place meaning tiny rooms. And $30 self park in a wide open surface lot. Ridiculous.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Meanwhile missus is apparently giving me the silent treatment for staying on the road another night, despite warning that it could happen.

  18. Ownbestenemy

    Rereading Bidens EO on the activation of ready reserves I was initially correct. Up to 450 IRR can be reactivated.

    Quick search of an EO of this type.

    Clinton in 1999 for Kosovo.
    Bush none but I’m assuming the swell of recruits post 9/11 helped
    Obama in 2010 for Haiti earthquake
    Obama in 2014 for Ebola in West Africa humanitarian mission
    Trump in 2020 for Lil Rona
    Biden in 2023 twice. First for the border and now this.

    Not unique but timing is…interesting.

    • Zwak , “There is infinite amount of hope in the universe… just not for us.”

      Wasn’t there some movie complaining about this? Stop Loss, if I remember right.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Bit different. Stop loss was to keep active (maybe reserves too) that were coming up on their 4/6 years and military said get fucked

        • Gustave Lytton

          Yes, reserves too. Also at different points, mobilized reservists were kept on AD or in theater longer such as for the surge™️.

          • dbleagle

            Bush II used a different mobilization authority. He called a “partial mobilization” which meant up to 1M for 2 years. When the band kept the dancers on the floor it was interpreted as 2 years out of a 5 year period and no more than 1M at any given time.

            The next two level of mobilization, full and total, require Congressional action. Unlimited personnel for the period of the emergency, plus 6 months. The last time we had these imposed was WWII.

    • LCDR_Fish

      If they call up any IRR it’s because they’re looking for a *very specific* skillset that should be otherwise already represented in the reserves. And that’s probably spread across all services too.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Or looking to fill with bodies without robbing existing organizations.

        • LCDR_Fish

          There are a lot of Ready Reservists – and they’d come up in the chain long before you’d ping an IRR.

          Offhand (without actually doing any research) a specialty that may not be represented any longer (but more likely to be in the “retired fleet reserve” or other service equivalent vice IRR (last 8 years max) would be “special weapons”. IYKWIMAITYD

      • Chafed

        From what I read above, Tres has a very specific skill set.

  19. Tres Cool

    AirBNB update- not only is the a/c out and its 82 degrees in here, but someone was just pounding on the door. It was “Diary of an Angry Black Woman”.
    Seems we blocked the driveway, and she couldn’t get to her rental? Astonished, a few of us asked, “Rental?”

    “Fools, I rents from the same person you do. Now me and my husband, we work late and we leave early. I need a clear path in an out.”

    Uhh..the thing behind us that looks like a garage? Its an airBNB rental, too. Go figure.

    • UnCivilServant

      That detail should have been disclosed at check-in. A simple “Don’t block the driveway, there’s another guest back there,” would have sufficed.

    • UnCivilServant

      Fridays suck.

      I guess I have to drag my fat ass into the office and get things prepped for Monday’s upgrade work.

      • robodruid

        That sounds like real work.

        • UnCivilServant

          I may be a manager, but I’m also an application administrator.

    • Gender Traitor

      Good morning, Sean, U, and ‘bodru!

      Monday’s going to be crazy busy, but I can’t think of a darn thing I have to do today besides the usual snail mail and interoffice bag sorting. If I’d had a lick of sense, I’d have taken the day off, but my boss is WFH again today, so why waste a Virtual Vacation Day?

      • robodruid

        Good Morning GT.
        i hope its a quiet day for you and everyone.

        • Gender Traitor

          Thanks. If you don’t mind my asking, what was this about a water commission?

          • robodruid

            I did speak to the town board of trustees. Very nervous, made mistakes.
            Had to leave as wife accidently let dogs out, very bad thing. Nobody got hurt.
            I get the feeling they don’t like this developer.

            An oddity.
            I worked with one of the board members @ tinker afb.
            one of the members has a business right next to the house where developer lives. (makes sense if you saw it) She was glaring at developer while i was speaking.
            We are still moving.

            • Gender Traitor

              I’m sorry you still need to move, but it sounds as if the town trustees like you more than they like the developer. With any luck, that will have some positive effect on you, whatever you end up doing. I sure hope you find a place even better than where you are now.

            • Grosspatzer

              This sucks. I take it you have a destination, the logistics of the move must be a nightmare. I hope everything works out for you.

              • robodruid

                We do not have a destination, but we have a goal.
                More land, less house, hopefully less mortgage.
                Wife is confident that she can find land to love. (a very positive change from a week ago)
                We are studying the logistics of a animal movement.

                Will be chaotic i bet.
                I have been told that the average listing for a house in Enid ok is 4 days.
                ?

      • UnCivilServant

        My supervisor is on vacation, as is one of my two direct reports. It’s just me and the new guy today.

        • Gender Traitor

          Time to make up some “all other duties as assigned” for him? Sounds as if no one else would be around to tell him otherwise…

          • UnCivilServant

            I was probably going to tell him to go back to working on automating the billing report.

            • Gender Traitor

              Is that likely to keep him occupied all day?

              • UnCivilServant

                It’s a messy manual process right now. So it’s going to take up some time.

              • Grosspatzer

                It will keep him out of UCS’ hair, that is the important thing.

      • Grosspatzer

        Mornin’, reprobates!

        Big meeting yesterday to discuss the rollout of a feature we developed in March which has been on hold waiting for vendor approval. We’ll be activating this in two weeks, and here I thought it was going to be a quiet summer. I get to lead the rollout since my Mgr will be gamboling in Vegas. The meeting participants might have been taken aback when I pointed out that it had been so long since we developed this feature that I forgot what I did. IT WAS A JOKE!!! Maybe.

        • UnCivilServant

          “What was this application again?”

        • Gender Traitor

          Good morning, ‘patzie!

          It’s always disappointing to find oneself stuck in a meeting and discover the hard way that no one else involved has a sense of humor.

            • Gender Traitor

              Good morning, TO’G!

              Now I want chocolate.

              • Toxteth O'Grady

                Mornin’, Ralph.

              • Toxteth O'Grady

                (Or would you rather be Sam?)

  20. Gender Traitor

    ***SIGH!!!*** There are already three accidents showing this morning on the local news “powerhouse” station’s website traffic map, one of them along my route to work. Traffic lately has been nuts – I think there have been even more major accidents screwing up area interstate traffic than there have been shootings.

    • Grosspatzer

      You should move to NYC, where they are moving heaven and earth to eliminate vehicular traffic. Paradise is just around the corner!

  21. Grosspatzer

    https://nypost.com/2023/07/14/transgender-cyclist-wins-female-race-to-prove-males-are-physically-superior-to-women-has-message-for-trans-athletes/

    Na is not “honored” by winning the race but used her momentum on the podium to send a message that athletic committees should include a “third gender” category for transgender athletes.

    Probably unworkable given the limited number of such athletes; also, how many of those are interested in fair competition? Still makes more sense than the current clusterfuck.

    • UnCivilServant

      I doubt there are any interested in fair competition.

    • Gender Traitor

      Refreshing honesty, at least.

    • rhywun

      knew since the age of seven that she should have been born a female.

      Stop that.

    • Nerfherder (Non-Non-Man)

      That will get memory holed

    • R C Dean

      “Na is not “honored” by winning the race but used her momentum on the podium”

      I thought Na was a dude.

  22. Raven Nation

    10pm eastern Australia; 3:15 alarm set for start of trans-Pacific return. 😵‍💫

    See ya next week Glibbies.

    • Gender Traitor

      Safe travels, RN!