The Glibertarian Farmer

I live back in the woods, you see

My woman and the kids and the dogs and me…

Because you can’t starve us out and you can’t make us run

‘Cause we’re them old boys raised on shotguns

-Hank Williams Jr./ A Country Boy Can Survive

I’ve been kicking this article around for years. I actually found a draft from 2018. Sometimes I think it’ll be philosophic. Or not. I’ve taken picture after picture for writing up how-to articles on building a chicken coop, building a brooder, fixing a woodshed, etc. Maybe sharing some fairly horrific farming experience. Or some hilarious moments. I can’t really decide so what I’m going to propose is a series called The Glibertarian Farmer. It’ll be randomly populated with various farming articles on all of the above.

What is a Glibertarian Farmer? My own version is a slant on the Gentleman Farmer. I don’t farm to make a living… it’s not my day job. Rather it’s a pursuit that grants me freedom and independence. Good ole Hank sums it up just about perfectly. We moved out here into the country to be free. Free from petty bureaucrats. Free from government schools indoctrinating my children. Free from reliance on grocery stores and the grid. Free to shoot in my backyard. Free to do whatever I want whenever I want.

Bullseye the Bull

I know several Glibs have none too fond memories of childhoods on farms. My father grew up on one and hated it. But it’s different when you don’t need to make a living from it. Then, unless if the bull breaks loose (again), farm chores are on your schedule. And you can hire help. It’s a completely different experience. My children are growing up remembering firepits, shooting at our backyard range (try taking a 7 year old to a public range), getting licked by their dog-friendly bull, having goats sit on their laps, loyal dogs guarding them inside and outside, and turkeys eating scratch out of their hands.

Enjoying a Siesta

Guard dog on duty

Freedom means everything to me and living back in the woods is how I obtained it. Covid was a pretty blunt warning about what could happen. We’d be fine if the grocery stores closed. I have ample breeding livestock, gardens, and water sources. Plus at least a year’s supply of non-perishable food. If Covid really was a deadly pandemic? We could lockdown the property at a moment’s notice with gated access and guard dogs. Riots like we saw in Kenosha? My neighbors, those good old boys raised on shotguns, would ensure rioting outsiders disappeared well before coming close to my homestead. No starving us out and no running.

The most expensive eggs I’ll ever have

But that’s not prepping for the sake of prepping. These are just the perks of freedom. My backyard is a stunning view of the Shenandoah where I own as far as I can see to the last treeline.I have acres of woods filled with game for hunting and hiking trails. A stocked pond for fishing. A private shooting range with no restrictions on age or firearm. I enjoy raising the livestock and look forward to eating my own grassfed/grain-finished Angus grown right here. It’s primal. It’s paradise. It’s priceless to me, but this is obtainable by anyone. Country living is not expensive.

Good old girl raised on shotguns… and rifles (DD with a carbine at age 7)

But it’s not without challenges. I’ve had to unwrap barbed wire caught around the bull’s leg without getting trampled when the sedative didn’t work all the way. It’s become necessary to have to put down animals that I’d grown very attached to and trusted me. The look of betrayal is something that I’ll never forget. Waiting all night in hiding to ambush a predator killing my livestock and then having to put in 10 hours at my day job the next day. Having to change my underwear after the tractor goes up on 2 wheels. The list goes on.

George you naughty pig

What say you? Is there interest in this continuing as a series? I can’t promise regularity or even consistency in the type of articles I would write. Are any of you interested in moving to the country? Or if already in the country, building out a homestead? Or just hearing about it?

This city boy turned country boy has made a lot of mistakes over the past decade since my wife and I made the move and started our family. But I’ve learned from each and every one. And I’m getting better. A Glibertarian Farmer can survive.