(((Jews))) do things right- we don’t just have New Years, we have two whole days of New Years. Do you know how much alcohol I can consume in two days? I do. And I’m feeling it. Taking a long bike ride yesterday didn’t help, it merely focused me on the intense pain in my taint- the helpful folks at the bike shop told me that it’s perfectly normal and that eventually I would build up scrotal callous (coincidentally the name of a band I used to play in).

today’s birthdays which include my kinda guy; one of our intellectual forefathers; a guy who was a bit of a space cadet; an early victim of police violence; a truly forgettable Chief Justice named after a truly ineffective DA; an exception to the “dynasties suck” rule; Daryl Dragon’s spirit guide;  a guy whose career peaked in a monkey suit; an astronaut who didn’t punch anyone– that we know about; a woman who fucked Mel Brooks and Dustin Hoffman; one more argument in favor of term limits; a mediocrity famous for something or other, maybe hanging out with actual talents; a guy who had more wood than Peter North; and another truly forgettable Supreme.

Let’s do our last New Year Links of 5784.

 

I’m sure there is much missing in this story.

 

Follow-up on a story I linked yesterday. Paul Brodeur’s stupidity is the gift that keeps on giving.

 

The captain of the Titanic scoffs at the iceberg.

 

Left out of the story: Bell was possibly the most corrupt town in the US.

 

I don’t know if this correlation will hold up, but it’s a fascinating idea.

 

I need to see this photo in order to make a fair and informed judgement.

 

I love clawhammer-style banjo. And Phoebe Sanders is insanely adorable. I hope she makes it big. The Old Guy is enchanted.