Every once in a while something stupid becomes part of the conversation and we’re reminded this is truly the best timeline.

This is my review of Flying Basset Real Phek in Por Ta:

Being from Arizona, particularly growing up around Mexicans, seeing people wearing cowboy boots to pretty much any event is not all that unusual.  Not just to formal events either, people just wear them everywhere.

Can you blame them?  They’re rather stylish, and because they are designed specifically for safer horseback riding they’re easy to get on and off without laces.  The prominent heel allows the rider to securely maintain control of the stirrups.  The open top allows the foot to slip out in the event the rider falls off and gets stuck with a runaway horse.   Several men in my family wear them to formal events, like weddings, funerals, criminal courts, etc.  I have considered buying a pair myself (in snakeskin of course) but I have not been to Mexico in a while (a surprisingly good place to find quality footwear) and the people in my family that do wear them have one thing in common relative to me:  they’re all shorter.

So, exactly how tall is Ron DeSantis?

While many political figures’ heights are a matter of public record, others are notoriously tight-lipped or deceptive about their true stature. In the former camp, you’ll find President Joe Biden (6’0″), Chris Christie (5’11”), and Jeb Bush (6’3″). In the latter, there’s United States Secretary of Transportation Pete Buttigieg, former President Donald Trump, and now DeSantis.

Many politicians’ heights are listed on their Wikipedia page. Not DeSantis. His Wikipedia contains no mention of his height. One site noted that estimates of his height vary from 5’9″ to 6’2″. Others say he’s closer to 5’7″.

Please note, there is nothing wrong with being short and in many respects its more of a hassle to be tall.  Can you imagine what a nightmare buying a car is for Shaq?

The trouble is, its an incredibly low bar for the internet to tear down your ego.  Pun intended.  Particularly when your opponent is effectively the guy in high school that showered after gym class specifically because he wanted everyone to know his penis was bigger, regardless if that was true.  I can’t decide if it sadder DeSantis is wearing cowboy boots to try to appear taller than he is, or politics is now on a level where the childish name calling is almost quaint.  I will have to see a video of him walking in these to decide, but the photos do look really weird.

Its not that unusual for someone to have issues with image like this.  After all, there is a similar debate online over the actual height of Arnold Schwarzenegger.  For good reason, because Lou Ferrigno is clearly in a different weight class.

 

How feck in real is dis por ta?  A pro pa English por ta, is dawk but not blak.  It is sor ta sweet, but bittah.  Mid range in alc hole con tent, an not par ticu lly carb on etted.  Throw dow sum cues to make ya lie back, and think of England, an ya dun well hav it.  They do dis? Aye, bet da bit Doc teh Snoddlewenkings at the Willoughbyshire Fek accent Inst a toot, mey be a bit mawch.  No need to ya sum thin ya not, wen ye chuffed inya muff, mate. Flying Basset Real Phek in Por Ta: 3.8/5 5.6%ABV