Non-academic business brought me down to Pittsburgh whence I limn this ode to the stupidity of the world. If Lamar Jackson hadn’t done an epic choke two weeks ago, I’d be trolling the populace with my Ravens sweatshirt. Alas, that opportunity vanished. But I did manage to see the sights of this metropolis and I was again reminded of why I eschewed big city life and banished myself to academic Hooterville. And of course, I got the giggles every time someone said “yinz.”

Here in the rurals, we do birthdays before news, and today’s include a guy who always gets me stoked; a delightful actor who birthed the Skipper; a guy who made me feel better about MY nose; the original Mr. Transistor; the best drummer to ever come out of Baltimore; the best harmonica player to ever come out of Baltimore; a woman who wrote the worst cookbook of all time; a guy who liked to stand next to Robert Reich so he could feel big; an absolutely awesome TV producer/director/writer; and a guy I put in the same bin as Rush Limbaugh (“I absolutely don’t see what’s entertaining here”).

OK, now it’s the news’s turn.


“I smell a rat.” And looking at Pritzker, he probably ate it.


…and then she downed her third bottle.


“Oh, we forgot that Team Blue is supposed to hate Jews. My bad.”


Team Blue wants to increase food costs even more. On the bright side, there will be less shitty food around.


I can only celebrate when a concept this shitty is euthanized.


Go long on popcorn futures.


Fusion is the power source of the future and always will be.


The Old Man wonders if it would be possible to have any more saxophone greatness on one stage. I don’t think so. Coltrane was, of course, Coltrane, the absolute peak of hard bop, and Dolphy was clearly the guy who started taking that genre into the sort of free jazz of Andrew Hill, Ornette Coleman, Don Cherry, and the later era Miles Davis. It’s just fucking brilliant.