So clean!


So… what do we have in the sky for this week?  Tomorrow will be an alignment between the Sun the Moon and the Earth, but you probably already know that.  Of course, that raises the question, what is the Astrological significance of an eclipse?  Well, as you remember from previous installments of Know Your Omens, anything strange happening in the sky is considered a violation of the Divine Perfection and therefore bad.  This should be even worse for something like the sun being eaten.  However something to keep in mind is that popularity overrides philosophical consistently any day of the week and for the last couple of centuries eclipses have been really popular spectacles.  Which means any astrologer wanting to keep their client base is going to encourage celebrations and parties on that day.

However. It’s going to be a baaaaaad time for Aries.  Not only does the sun get eaten in that constellation (If you want to know what Aries looks like, that’s the constellation that will shows up when the sun goes away). and it is hosting MERCURY RETROGRADE, that little fuckwit will be aligning with the sunblocking moon on Tuesday and then slipping directly between the earth and Sun on Friday.  Aries and Pisces are drawing all the fire, so if you’re one of the other ten, make sure to thank those guys for making your week less sucky.


Angel is afraid to take on Lily unless she’s distracted. Kind of a bitch move.


Aries: 5 of Coins reversed – Rejection.

Taurus: 4 of Swords – Rest, safety, guardianship.

Gemini: King of Wands reversed – Difficulties involving a redneck, traditional male type.

Cancer: 2 of coins reversed -Parties that aren’t fun, or someone who is having fun — but at your expense.

Leo: 10 of Wands – Succeeding/progressing in your efforts, but these responsibilities inhibit you.

Virgo: Judgement reversed – Something coming to a final end, or something which was thought to have ended becoming a problem again.

Libra: 7 of Cups – A visit from the Good Idea Fairy. For those of you unfamiliar with this entity, this is not a good thing.

Scorpio: Page of Swords reversed – Just because it’s unimportant doesn’t mean it can’t be a real pain in the ass.

Sagittarius: 6 of Swords – Journey by water, or an unsuccessful attempt to run away from your problems.

Capricorn: 6 of Coins – Competition for your resources, necessity of making decisions.

Aquarius: Queen of Swords reversed – Typically female-coded bad things happening. Can also mean a literal woman causing problems for you.

Pisces: 8 of Cups reversed – Past humility leading to good things, or a reward beyond what you’d think appropriate for your efforts.