As it turns out, I have never reviewed this beer—but I have made fun of Seinfeld.  Why shouldn’t I do both?

This is my review of Xingu (H/T:  TOK)

Few have as much credibility needed to criticize the entertainment industry quite like the guy that pretty much owned it for a decade (TW:  Outkick):

They’re so dead serious! They don’t have any idea that the movie business is over. They have no idea,” the 69-year-old Seinfeld told GQ Magazine “Film doesn’t occupy the pinnacle in the social and cultural hierarchy that it did for most of our lives.”

When a movie came out, if it was good, we all went to see it. We all discussed it,” Seinfeld continued, before adding, “We quoted lines and scenes we liked. Now we’re walking through a fire hose of water, just trying to see.”

The fabled comedian does have a point. I can’t think of any significant pop culture trends that have come from movies in recent years – hell not even lame movie lines like Scary Movie’s “Wassssupppp?!” that teenagers were doing all over America when I was growing up!

That…wasn’t really even Hollywood.  That was a Bud Light commercial.

So it goes, I have to agree with Jerry.  Not just because they have no new ideas, but because they’ve been trying to “improve” old ideas.  Querying their AI to create something truly awful. Take this AI rendering of Seinfeld reimagined for Gen Z.  It would probably go something like this:

Setting: Jerry’s studio apartment.

Kramer: “Here comes Boomer Jerry!  Everyone is going Boomer all of a sudden!”

Jerry: “Stop calling me Boomer Jerry, Kramer!”

Kramer: “JERRYS A BOOMER”

*bzzzzzzzzt*

Jerry to intercom:  “Yeah”

George (from intercom): “It happened again. I can’t do this anymore Jerry.”

Jerry (to intercom): “Come on up.” (Back to Kramer) “We’re not finished here.”

Kramer: “Okay Boomer” (opens door letting George in). “Buy the dip Jerry!” (Signature slide through the doorway, slams the door)

In this universe, Kramer is an openly racist cryptobro.  Not against all Jews, just the ones in Israel.  George is an Incel, after years of only being able to attract transwoman—still lives in Queens with his parents.  Elaine is a non-binary pansexual but has an OnlyFans account with Puddy, who is a based Nigerian in this universe.  She is constantly fired and rehired by J. Peterman for some reason.

I had this a few times before.  I don’t know why but for whatever reason Xingu tastes like beef jerky to me.  Once in college I found it and thought “this tastes like jerky.”  A couple other times I thought maybe a bad batch got though QC like a Taurus revolver.  Nope, it tasted like jerky.  Even last November I was at a Fogo de Chaō and grabbed one from the bar while waiting for my table.  It tasted like jerky but(!) I ate a ton of meat that night so I didn’t notice it at all.  Weird?  Yes, but I am as baffled as you since this is right in my wheelhouse and I know a lot of people seem to like this one. Xingu: 2.1/5