Drunk raccoon found passed out on liquor store floor after breaking in
Staff at a Virginia liquor store got a shock on Saturday when they came into work to find the store had been broken into by a very intoxicated raccoon.
The “masked bandit” was found passed out in the bathroom between the toilet and bin having helped itself to some bottom shelf spirits.
Animal control officer Samantha Martin transported the “suspect” for questioning at Hanover County Animal Protection and Shelter but not before it had a chance to sober up.
After a few hours of sleep and zero signs of injury (other than maybe a hangover), the animal was safely released back into the wild.
He holds up a mirror to society and society recoils in horror. Aren’t we all a drunk raccoon that broke into a liquor store and then passed out drunk by a toilet? Can we not extend ourselves grace?
Speaking of drunk raccoons:
Waymo self-driving cars make illegal U-turns, zigzag through tunnels, roll past stops: report
San Francisco residents gripe that Waymo’s once-polite self-driving cars are suddenly behaving like “an aggressive, New York taxi driver,” weaving through tunnels in zigzags, rolling through stops and squeezing past other cars, according to a report.
In September, police in nearby San Bruno, Calif. pulled over a Waymo after officers watched it make an illegal U-turn — a sign of how sharply the company says it has reprogrammed the cars to be more “confidently assertive.”
When cops approached the offending self-driving car, a Waymo operator’s voice began speaking to them, according to the Wall Street Journal.
The car screamed “PEOPLE OF EARTH! IGNORE ME!”
I’m only including the pic because I know all you freaks care about is dem titties.
You can deny your desires all you want, but I know you all love a hairy moob.
There was this interregnum period, when the 80s were over, but the 90s hadn’t really begun. Musically, this was a dark era, when Vanilla Ice roamed the land, revolting those with ears. Pop R&B like Janet Jackson, Mariah Carey on the rise; the death rattle of party rap; Madonna continues her reign of terror; Wilson Philips, Wilson fucking Philips.
But there were bright spots, like the wobbly beginnings of college rock transitioning to alternative music. But this Rolling Stones cover by The Soup Dragons is just so 1990 to me.
” I know all you freaks care about is dem titties”
Q, is that you?
I don’t care about party if they are nice titties.
I think I prefer them to be a little more perky than those pictured.
I’m a motorboating mutha f’er
the animal was safely released back into the wild.
Thank goodness.
The other trashed pandas left it behind when they went down the street to another party.
Of late, I have come to despise racoons and regard them as verminous.
Oddly, I’ve still never encountered them in real life.
I had one on my deck last week.
He was the explanation of where all the cat food was going to.
Just chilling about three feet from one of the cats like they were buds.
They have thumbs! Monkeys with stripes.
Toxic I’m so glad cats don’t have thumbs.
They come by my house but I keep the alcohol inside so they wander off.
I saw one wandering down the street near Fisherman’s Wharf in SF during a lunch break once. That was… unexpected.
I have had one steal food from my Army pup tent whilst sleeping in it. The Tactical Officer I was sharing it with was woken by it touching is hair. He chased it out with his entrenching tool while I continued to sleep.
Raccoons on Army Posts know what MREs are and where to look for them.
Nasty tempered and verminous.
Bears and wolverines were why we didn’t keep MREs in tents in Alaska.
My brother and I had a pet racoon one winter. Grandma’s dog killed its mother and brothers. It was potty trained. I loved to steal Grandma’s chocolate cake. We let her go back to the wild in the spring.
😢
“but I know you all love a hairy moob”
What do you mean, you all? I feel othered.
You forgot Milli Vanilli and Tone Loc. I recall dancing with a shapely young woman New Year’s Eve 1989 while she told me how much she liked those “artists”.
Young MC. The bassist is Flea you know.
Hold on….
It’s not over til the fat lady sings.
My weather vane for any band’s suckage has been 100% reliable over the years. If my sister likes them, they suck. My sister liked Wilson Phillips.
Heh. I use the same barometer, except it is my brother.
My sister was about 50-50
She would tend to like the worst albums of a good band.
I’m sure she owes Columbia house a few hundred still.
+1 Fleetwood Mac’s Tusk
That video gave me sneezures.
“Vanilla Ice roamed the land”
I was going to post all the lyrics to Ice Ice Baby, but I decided I’d rather go rake leaves.
I had a roommate in 1990 who loved to blast Vanilla Ice in his Mitsubishi Eclipse.
In the mid nineties, my brother loved to blast Limpbiskit in his Vanagon Syncro.
We got weird looks in Oakland.
Who were the guy twins that played upbeat wuss rock? They were way worse than Wilson Phillips.
Bros? 😉
All I want for Christmas is for Mariah Carey to go away.
Jellyfish, Dramarama, Material Issue… There was some good stuff hiding back then.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etviGf1uWlg
Deee-Lite was awesome and the band I was thinking of was Nelson, the worst band in the history of ever.
Who Was Worse: Nelson vs. Extreme! A battle for the bottom of the hill!
I had a looped sample of this as my ringtone for a long while
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=twxtMkIfFrk
Nelson was worse without a doubt. Extreme was terrible though, extremely so.
Nelson?
Nelson?
Too slow.
The Nelsons
Ricky’s kids
When cops approached the offending self-driving car, a Waymo operator’s voice began speaking to them, according to the Wall Street Journal.
What’s the self driving car equivalent of a sovereign citizen?
“Why do you want me to roll my window down? Beep, boop, borp”
Eep Opp Ork Ah-Ah
Fuck off slaver!
Sugarfree twice in one day.
What a time to be alive.
As for 1991? Color Me Badd sold 12 million records worldwide.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Color_Me_Badd
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oxu3pq319r0
Oh God…
Heinous.
When that video pans across their faces in the beginning, they all look like journeyman plumbers after finishing their first full week of work. Just wretched dollar store style.
Don’t you dare slight Color Me Badd!
I just did.
You are ruining my 7th grade Sadie Hawkins dance memories and I hate you!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2nXGPZaTKik
Color Me Badd
My brain vacillates between Beavis and Butthead & Sandberg/Timberlake on SNL when I read that.
I wanna sex you up…
/in Silence of the Lambs killers voice…
IT PUTS THE LOTION ON ITS SKIN, OR IT GETS THE I WANNA SEX YOU UP AGAIN!!
And this exists.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cool_as_Ice
I have seen it. It’s like having your dick nailed to a board and then the board is thrown into the ocean with your dick still attached and there’s jellyfish all over your bleeding dick and the jellyfish are really angry.
So I should post that on a Thursday?
Yes. You should. It’s fantastic. Bro got hold of it and we had great MST3k fun with it growin’ up.
Oddly, I’m glad he’s doing well in a ‘completely’ different line of work. (He was obviously into TV showmanship beforehand.) Net worth, ~$20M. Strange career trajectory in life. The boomers have all their fucking music folk getting hagiographic, circle-jerk movie tributes to their fantasies of these musicians, Robert Matthew van WInkle would likely be more interesting. Just the real name alone, yikes. ‘Van Winkle in Time: Ice Ice Flippy (Not dolphins)’
Then you have to use the board, while still attached to the bleeding dick, to row the boat back to shore.
There’s a Rifftrax version.
While your mother-in-law sings, “Michael, Row Your Boat Ashore” to you repeatedly from a really bad loudspeaker.
But are you willing to sacrifice their love?
Hire third-world H1B programmers, get third-world driving habits.
Hmmm. Sounds legit.
Speaking of retards
The White House will formally announce its planned hike in US fuel costs by $23 billion tomorrow, according to Reuters.
——-
But another effort has focused on changing policy in a way that will raise fuel costs for Americans, adding to already-high energy prices.
The specific rollback tomorrow focuses on a rule passed under President Biden which would save Americans $23 billion in fuel costs by requiring higher fuel economy from auto manufacturers. By making cars use less fuel on average, Americans would not only save money on fuel, but reduce fuel demand which means that prices would go down overall.
That’s some drunk raccoon logic, that is.
Wow. Yes it is.
Derp.
Consider the source.
You made me check the source.
They are awful and zero original content. But a good aggregator of EV content.
Uh…its not using less fuel..it is using it more efficiently…ah never mind.
So… raising fuel costs by… not in any way shape or form raising fuel costs now, but possibly in some utterly nebulous sense increasing demand in the future by allowing people to buy cars they prefer, almost certainly at a lower price, also in the future, which might use more gas. No matter how much you hate the journalismists it is not enough.
Tomorrow, Duffy is expected to make an announcement formally changing CAFE rules, lowering the required fuel economy for 2022-2031 model year vehicles, even despite all of the other changes in trying to make the rules unenforceable. The theory behind this would be to make it harder to later enforce the rules, and to allow automakers to get off with more pollution, and to increase fuel demand and fuel prices for longer until a real government returns to power and starts doing its job to regulate pollution.
Yep.
That is funny
Regulate me! Regulate me!
/fans self
Which is still better than anything produced in the last 10 years…
Released 4 1/2 years ago:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=As03tlODkdw
Little Cindy Lou Who is going to summon James Bond if she keeps singing like that.
Cindy Lou calls my name:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rHBxJCq99jA&list=RDrHBxJCq99jA&start_radio=1
Be sure to pause at the 2:06 mark and grab a screen shot.
What? You don’t like Wet Leg?
For shame! Shame!
Judge for yourself:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zIEZdq_25bs&list=RDzIEZdq_25bs&start_radio=1
Wet Leg is great. I saw them as a punky bunch of young adults in sun dresses in 2022. Three years later sexy punks who still kept their energy and just got better.
Released eight years ago:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OTfHB2V_Obo&list=RDOTfHB2V_Obo&start_radio=1
8 years ago.
Since I’ve been scolded before: some NSFW lyrics.
They are awful and zero original content. But a good aggregator of EV content.
They are hilariously overwrought about anything which contradicts their preferences/prejudices. They are like toddlers lashing out at nap time.
The highbrow version is CleanTechnica.
You take the Top Men at Ars and make them even more insufferable.
https://cleantechnica.com/2025/12/03/tesla-lobbying-uk-on-ev-policies-as-trump-guts-critical-us-auto-policy/
Tomorrow’s announcement is expected to be attended by executives from the Big Three American automakers – GM, Ford, and Stellantis (formerly Chrysler).
Their presence on stage suggests that their prior commitments to energy efficiency and electrification were not serious, as they are now joining in an effort to increase your fuel costs, just to save themselves a few engineering dollars on having to provide something other than the disgusting, deadly land yachts that are a blight on the nation’s roads and are murdering pedestrians at a 50-year high.
Stop it. You’re killing me.
Based on ped deaths reported in Philly, the peds are the ones at fault.
and yet not one of those pedestrians was Jameson Dow.
Now you’re cooking with gas.
Those disgusting, deadly land yachts are entirely the result of…(checks paperwork)….government regulations.
Also, I’m all for murdering pedestrians.
Bicyclists first please. Glib riders excluded.
Danger! Danger!
A recall on Ritz products sold in eight states was just announced, according to a company announcement.1
Mondelēz International. Mondelēz Global LLC conducts limited voluntary recall of 1 SKU of Ritz Peanut Butter Cracker Sandwiches in New York, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Georgia, Arkansas, Missouri, Oklahoma and Alabama.
This is due to mislabeling resulting in an undeclared peanut allergen.
——-
“The affected cartons include individually wrapped packs that may be incorrectly labeled as Cheese variety even though the product may be a Peanut Butter variety,” Mondelēz International, the parent company for Ritz, explains in a press release. “People who have an allergy or severe sensitivity to peanuts may risk serious or life-threatening allergic reactions by consuming this product.”
Millions will die.
The same Top Men that gave us the clot shot gave an entire generation a disproportionately high allergy to peanuts.
Science!
Millions will die.
Good.
Millions more? I think some bodies from the Y2K disaster are still out there on the streets, not to mention the hundreds of millions who died from fentanyl, Covid, Trump economics, melancholy caused by Ellen moving to the UK, being triggered by Sweeney’s boobs and jeans, and etc. etc.
Aren’t we all a drunk raccoon that broke into a liquor store and then passed out drunk by a toilet?
When you post on glibertarians.com, no one knows you are a drunk racoon.
That should be KK’s next screen name.
Better known as
WYPOGNOKYAADR.
WYPOGNOKYAADR
🙂
The Drinker recommends Estonia
Screen Tourism (Part 2) – Estonia
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=crCjmBPyDLQ
I do hope this goes somewhere.
https://justthenews.com/politics-policy/regulation/federal-govt-sued-texas-farming-associations-giving-unelected
We need another three or four Thomas’s.
Bros, Britain’s darlings in ’88.
When Will I Be Famous? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvQTTA9raJU
*horror emoji*
Steve Cropper RIP,
Back from a gorgeous 5hr jaunt up to Michigan, now fully supplied. Voca Rehab and I had a talk today, with one solid new lead found and applied to. Most interesting, however, is one that would really help the E(v)Nigma of my storybook life come ’round:
“Transcriptionist-Child Abuse/Sex Crimes
*Transcribes recorded statements of detectives, defendants and/or witnesses provided by law enforcement officers with attention to detail and accuracy.
*Creates narratives. A narrative is a description of the events as described by the detective and/or witness.”
Pay *is* a solid bracket above what I’m making now, which is a piddling amount, and this one still is, but *damn.* Uh. Work would certainly be interesting. ‘Creating narratives’ is pretty much summing up the rambling, possibly weepy, childish and ranting of the abused. I’m glad my brain can compartmentalize shit like that. Helps I don’t have kids.
*After* I wrote a good cover letter for a good opportunity, I had a flush of the Trembles. Nothing ‘big’ epileptically, but an odd spurt of it, left hand affected but not the right. Usually writing those is what sparks those, but whatevs.
Oh. My engine light came on again. Dammit. Everywhere here is full, but I played some poke-poke (not the fun kind) with the dealer that sold me this ’17 Kia Sportage in Sept. Pretty much pushed the ‘you guys sold this to me less than three months ago and it’s acting up?’ angle to see if they can take an express look at it tomorrow.
No other warning lights, nothing at all resembling an issue, when driving or visually under the hood. Their Kia-guy won’t be back ’til tomorrow, but the dealer sent him my info and what’s up on my end. Hopefully, things sway my way.
Have you checked the thermostat?
Great music from 1990-1991 that was a glimpse of the future of the decade.
https://youtu.be/Pi6RJmUNBbw?si=NnQgCnBdKKzTC1Ar