IFLA: The “Are You Sure?” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of April 26

by | Apr 26, 2026 | IFLA | 13 comments

Huh. Things are not supposed to suck? For an extended period of time? Really? Yes, really! For those of you that like to follow along at home, get your orreries out and spin the planets into today’s position. OK, see how you have the Earth, Mercury and Venus roughly equidistant around the Sun? That balance is only going to get more perfect until about Cino de Mayo with a couple of extra-bonus beneficence on the 28th and May 1. This particular balance is all about pleasant novelty, stability without boredom, and general nice times. The 28th may be a bit more in the novelty-oriented days with the Moon participating with Mercury, while on the end/beginning of the month the Moon’s influence is more directly joining with the Sun in favor of the home life. So enjoy this week, the stars can be bitches.

Caveat: Aries currently hosts a not-great collection of planets- Mars, Mercury, Saturn. Otherwise known as War, Chaos and Ending.

This week’s draw… holy heck. EIGHT majors?

Taurus: Ace of Cups reversed – House of the false heart, mutation, instability, revolution.

Gemini: The Lovers – Attraction, love, beauty, trials overcome. 

Cancer: 3 of Coins –  Métier, trade, skilled labor, aristocracy, renown, glory.

Leo: The Emperor reversed – Benevolence, compassion, credit, confusion to enemies, obstruction, immaturity.

Virgo: The Hierophant – Marriage, alliance, captivity, servitude, mercy and goodness; inspiration.

Libra: 9 of Cups – Concord, contentment, physical bien-être, victory, success, advantage, satisfaction.

Scorpio: The Hermit reversed – Concealment, disguise, policy, fear, unreasoned caution.

Sagittarius: The Empress – Fruitfulness, action, initiative, length of days, the unknown, clandestine, difficulty, doubt, ignorance. 

Capricorn: The Star reversed – Arrogance, haughtiness, impotence.

Aquarius: The Hanged Man – Wisdom, circumspection, discernment, trials, sacrifice, intuition, divination, prophecy. 

Pisces: The Tower reversed – Misery, distress, indigence, adversity, calamity, disgrace, deception, ruin, unforeseen catastrophe, oppression, imprisonment, tyranny.

Aries: 6 of Cups reversed – The future, renewal, that which will come to pass presently.

About The Author

Not Adahn

Not Adahn

Despite all my rage, I am still just an impeccably dressed rat.

13 Comments

  1. Gender Traitor

    That balance is only going to get more perfect until about Cino de Mayo with a couple of extra-bonus beneficence on the 28th and May 1. This particular balance is all about pleasant novelty, stability without boredom, and general nice times.

    I picked the right time to take a few days off work! 😃

  2. The Late P Brooks

    Sagittarius: The Empress – Fruitfulness, action, initiative, length of days, the unknown, clandestine, difficulty, doubt, ignorance.

    Look both ways before crossing the street.

    • dbleagle

      Bravo. That got a laugh out of me.

  3. SarumanTheWoefullyIgnorant

    “Leo: The Emperor reversed – Benevolence, compassion, credit, confusion to enemies, obstruction, immaturity.”

    Yes, yes, yes, no, no, very much so.

  4. Sean

    “ Cancer: 3 of Coins – Métier, trade, skilled labor, aristocracy, renown, glory.”

    I shall be worshipped. Sounds on point for the week. 👑

  5. The Late P Brooks

    A world socialist dictatorship is the cure

    The European Union, too, plans to accelerate clean energy deployment to help alleviate electricity bills. “Every delayed investment in the energy transition risks greater cost for society at a later stage,” a draft European Commission proposal states. The plan comes ahead of a conference in Colombia this month where representatives from 85 countries will gather to craft a roadmap on how to move beyond the fossil fuel era.

    The Iran war is a case study for the need to make this transition, according to the United Nations. “Clean energy is the antidote to fossil fuel cost chaos, because it is cheaper, safer, and faster to market,” said Simon Stiell, the UN’s climate chief. “Wars don’t disrupt the supply of sunlight for solar power, and wind power does not depend on vulnerable shipping straits.”

    The mounting toll of the climate crisis, though, is the primary reason to ditch coal, oil and gas, advocates argue. Such impacts are increasingly apparent in the US, as well as the rest of the world, with the country enduring its hottest and driest start to a year in recorded history, with record-breaking March heat and punishing bouts of drought, heat and wildfire strafing much of the US west.

    A global board of technocrats pulling solutions out of a magic hat will solve all of humanity’s problems. And an Energy Fairy with a magic wand to abolish physics.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Dump fossils to decrease costs?

      • rhywun

        Flat out lies but half their audience believes it with all their heart and all your tax dollars.

    • dbleagle

      Wars may not stop sunlight but any teenager with a bunch of rocks can. Anybody with a small caliber weapon can stop a windmill with only poor marksmanship.

  6. Animal

    A tad late, but I just stumbled across the news about Hayek. Saddening, and she was 14 years younger than me? That’s way, way too young. I remember her very fondly from many, many Friday and Saturday night Zooms during the Covid scare. She was always gracious, cheerful, smart as a whip, and her being beautiful (in all respects) didn’t hurt any, either.

    She was one of the good ‘uns. She’ll be missed. And, fuck cancer.

    • Ownbestenemy

      For my childish crassness she was indeed one of the smartest persons I have ever met.

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