Thursday Oh Crap Afternoon Links

by | Apr 23, 2026 | Daily Links | 69 comments

Man, time really got away from me this afternoon. I was chasing down a bug that was randomly assigning records to the wrong person. But only once in a while. Anyhow, here’s some links!

Oh now, the Dems are threatening FISA. That would be a damn shame.

I’ve worked in the private sector! Its brutal. They expect results.

Gotta love a good crypto scam.

About The Author

Brett L

Brett L

Brett set out to find America, the real America, the America of strip malls and serial killers, of butthole waxing and kelp smoothies, of cocaine and maggots. He sought it in the most American part of America—Florida: swamp gas and fever dreams, where love arrives on a rickety boat and leaves when it doesn't have the money for its fourth abortion. Oh, where has Brett gone? He’s drinking at the neck of America’s wang, chewing its foreskin and working its shaft. Brett is becoming legend. Brett can never die. Brett can never die. Brett is America, facedown in his own patriotic puke: the red his blood, the white his stomach lining, and the cold, cold blue his gas station slushie, spiked with coconut rum and tetracycline.

69 Comments

  1. kinnath

    fuck the us-aidians.

    • EvilSheldon

      I wish I could read it, just so I could enjoy the tears…

      • kinnath

        I’d did a ctrl-a/ctrl-c before it blocked me out. I got the gist of the article. We’re supposed to be sorry for couple, both of whom had incomes that were tied to USAID (one directly, one indirectly) are unemployed since it was shut down.

        As an elder who lived through the 70s and 80s, I say tough shit. Abandon the house. Leave DC. Start over someplace else. Many, many other people have lived through this too.

      • EvilSheldon

        Mmmmm, delicious.

      • Ted S.

        Entitled bastards who think they have a god-given right to my taxes.

      • Rat on a train

        @Neph, thanks for the microlooted version.

    • The Other Kevin

      All those jobs were created so people with phony baloney degrees could get fat paychecks. Maybe they should try Starbucks like the rest of their graduating class.

      • Nephilium

        Sheryl Cowan, 57, was making $272,000 a year as a senior vice president at a U.S.A.I.D.-funded nonprofit when she was let go at the end of March 2025. Last month she had an online interview for a $19-an-hour job managing a Penzeys Spices store near her home in Falls Church, Va.

        But they deserve the $272k/year a job!

      • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

        Not true. Some of them are also covers for CIA agents. But those probably aren’t the ones who lost their jobs.

      • rhywun

        “nonprofit”

        Sounds like she was profiting quite handsomely.

      • Furthest Blue pistoffnick (370HSSV)

        [Amy Uccello] made $175,000 a year. She had worked for the U.S. Agency for International Development or related groups for more than two decades.

        Catherine Baker, 36, who, as a contractor, made $127,000 a year recruiting staff and helping to start up U.S.A.I.D. projects.

        Sheryl Cowan, 57, was making $272,000 a year as a senior vice president at a U.S.A.I.D.-funded nonprofit…

        Don Niss, 56, spent 21 years at U.S.A.I.D., including three years managing the agency’s billion-dollar budgets for Afghanistan and Pakistan. Last year he was making $195,000 annually as a U.S.A.I.D. development adviser at the Pentagon.

        Jacqueline Devine … is a behavioral scientist who worked largely in sub-Saharan Africa on H.I.V. treatment…her $200,000 income as an agency contractor…

        I’m beginning to understand why there is so much wasteful spending in Washington. These people are horrible with money. Lowest salary mentioned is $127,000. Did they not sock some of it away for a rainy day just like this?

        Perhaps Tulip can start a frugality coaching business.

      • rhywun

        Yup I make less than all of them and I’m quite comfortable. Turns out that living within one’s means actually works.

      • creech

        Based on those salaries, they should have $500,000 to $1 million in savings and investment. Guess they never thought the gravy train would end.

    • Evan from Evansville

      HA! “She was fired by email while on maternity leave, given 24 hours to clear out her desk and left with three days of health insurance and no severance pay. She had worked for the U.S. Agency for International Development or related groups for more than two decades. 𝐒𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞 $𝟏𝟕𝟓,𝟎𝟎𝟎 𝐚 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫.”

      Yep. Go fuck yourself right up on outta here. How ’bout that?! Oh. Ya don’t like that, teary, Whiny McWhinerson!
      Well… “Do you like apples?”

    • DEG

      USAID is so yesterday. NED is in.

    • kinnath

      You can live a good life in the south or the midwest on a fraction of what these people were making in DC.

      They can follow the path taken by millions of blue collar workers in the rust belt that lost everything.

      Pull up stakes, start over somewhere else.

      • Tonio

        [whinily] But, Kin-nath, those places in flyover country are *icky*, and full of rednecks. You probably can’t even find a good restaurant.

      • Nephilium

        The real question for them, have they tried learning to code?

      • kinnath

        those places in flyover country are *icky*,

        Yes they are.

        and full of rednecks.

        Yes we are.

        So, they stay in DC and rot.

      • Rat on a train

        Let AI help you code …

  2. The Late P Brooks

    Mein Gott!

    I don’t know whether to shit or go blind. The New BMW 7, ladies and gentlemen.

    (from engadget)

  3. rhywun

    Jeffries calling anyone dumb is… a bit rich.

      • Ted S.

        There’s a sizzling take.

  4. Evan from Evansville

    Fucking Christ: “House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries (D-N.Y.) is warning that House Democrats might not back an extension of the government’s warrantless spy powers as long as FBI Director Kash Patel remains atop the agency.”

    ‘We’ll vote to stop YOUR warrantless spy powers! That shit’s ours!! That illegality’s only for us!! *neener neener!!!*’

    • R.J.

      His terms are acceptable.

    • creech

      Why can’t he wait until January?

  5. The Late P Brooks

    Moar gadgets!

    Big, fancy executive sedans are a dying breed, especially when it comes to EVs. With the Tesla Model S and Mercedes’ EQ line on their way out, pickings are slim. Aside from the upcoming S-Class, there’s the Lucid Air, Cadillac Celestiq and maybe the Porsche Taycan, depending on how far you’re willing to stretch the definition. But as the market leader in luxury sedans, BMW isn’t giving up yet. With the arrival of the new 7-series, the company has made a car — with a complete range of gas, hybrid and fully electric options — that truly embraces modern gadgetry.

    Never mind Jaguar, somebody needs to put BMW down.

    • Evan from Evansville

      FFS. Classic, British legacy and prestige is all they fucking had. I wanna see more of Clarkson’s reactions to all this shit.

  6. Evan from Evansville

    It’s strange for remote work to end precisely as PM lynx go out. *fingers perched*

    Strangeness, indeed. (I should get a doctorate in that. May pay off.)

  7. Grummun

    Some Democrats, including those who previously voted to reauthorize FISA, have expressed resistance to renewing the program under the Trump administration out of fear it may be abused … to the detriment of Democrats, that is. Surely that can’t be trying to claim they are against FISA abuse generally, as a matter of principle.

    • Evan from Evansville

      That’s what pisses me off, the utter openness of Dems’ own overreach, yet Rhy remains correct: The same folk will still vote for ’em. It’s a good strategy to attract folk on the fence who’ve only recently started to teeter, gives weight to their refrain of them STOPPING! something bad Trump’s up to. (Just ignore Blue’s ritualistic abuse of it themselves, but to supporters, that was when Dems were handcuffed by Trump’s maniacal grip on this (UNCONSTITUTIONAL!) power.

      And Blue plays their audience well. They know what the seals clap to. It’s rather disturbing.

  8. The Late P Brooks

    Sheryl Cowan, 57, was making $272,000 a year as a senior vice president at a U.S.A.I.D.-funded nonprofit

    Allow me to edit that for length and clarity:

    Sheryl Cowan, 57, was making $272,000 a year at a job which should never have existed.

    • TARDis

      Making, taking. Whatever.

  9. Ownbestenemy

    If you were let go of your FedGov job and can’t find equivalent work for approximate pay, then your work/knowledge was being extremely bloated.

    • The Other Kevin

      A VP from a tech company, manufacturing, fast food, etc. should be able to get a job in an adjacent business. Apparently there are no other businesses adjacent to grifting.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        Although I absolutely agree in principle, the job market is not a great one.

  10. The Late P Brooks

    She and her husband have applied for more than 100 jobs with no luck. Most of their friends don’t have jobs either.

    I bet Autozone is hiring.

    She doesn’t exactly look like she’s starving.

  11. Derpetologist

    Yesterday, I messaged my gal pal. I got a reply from someone claiming to be her brother who informed me she had stabbed herself in the stomach with a knife.

    I knew she was troubled and tried to comfort her. She seemed stable. Less than a month ago, we ate together at a restaurant.

    I asked to be informed and have not received any messages. When I was with her, she kept saying sorry for this and that. I wish I could have helped her more. It all sucks so much.

    • bacon-magic

      Unless you actively forced her into doing things you can not blame yourself for the actions of others. It is good that you have empathy for it and wanted to help. We can only help others if they want it.

      • The Other Kevin

        Wise words. I have one daughter who is eating herself to death, and another who is angry all the time because she’s bipolar and refuses to go on meds. It’s sad, but you can’t force someone to accept help. Feel sad, but accept that you did what you could.

      • bacon-magic

        TOK,
        There’s a guy at my work that is a heavy drinker. We say he’s “running rich”. I am just a lowly inside sales guy but I told him one day that I could clearly smell the vodka on him just so that he knew his coworkers were aware. I offered him help or just listen if he ever needed it and ended it there. We haven’t spoken about it since but at least he knows someone cares. That’s all anyone really needs…to know someone cares. You can’t fix everything but you can listen and commiserate.

    • Evan from Evansville

      Yikes. Think it’s legit? Could be a (desperate?) lie from someone, I suppose.

  12. Rat on a train

    So you found my bit of code that reassigns tickets from me to others?

  13. The Late P Brooks

    Then there is Michael Nicholson, 51, who was working for U.S.A.I.D. as a foreign service economist in Mozambique when he and his wife, also a foreign service officer, were laid off. They have a 4-year-old daughter and have since moved to Nairobi, where Mr. Nicholson is running his own start-up, AfriqueU, that connects talented African student basketball players with American universities.

    Making the world better place.

  14. The Late P Brooks

    “It’s been over a year, and it still is as bad,” he said. “I’m just able to talk about it now. I’m going to carry this the rest of my life.”

    Worse than the Bataan Death March.

    • Muzzled Woodchipper

      I’m almost 50, have been a stay-at-home parent for the last 16 years. I need a job to help deal with inflation but have been having a hard time finding one that can work.

      But I don’t fucking whine about it like I’m somehow entitled to a 6 figure job. The fuck outta here, bitch.

    • Ted S.

      Now do all the self-employed people whose businesses were shut down by the government during covid.

    • rhywun

      I appreciate the Left being more honestly & openly pro-criminal than usual. Keep it up, guys. Show the world your true colors.

  15. UnCivilServant

    I know the standard revolver layout has the trigger below the cylinder, but is there any reason why one couldn’t have it behind the lower half of the cylinder?

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