Wednesday Afternoon Sugarlinks – Sasquatch Propaganda

Wednesday Afternoon Sugarlinks – Sasquatch Propaganda

So, I do enjoy writing my Wednesday noon satire shorts, but damn it is difficult when shit likes this is the reality: Straight from Kamala's book. I mean, how can I, a simple monger of filth, compete with this? Also, you daffy dumb bitch, you should have stayed in...

Wednesday Afternoon Sugarlinks – I Didn’t Mean To Hurt You

Wednesday Afternoon Sugarlinks – I Didn’t Mean To Hurt You

Books by women: And the kicker: By the way: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/123852869-morning-glory-milking-farmViolet is a typical, down-on-her-luck millennial: mid-twenties, over-educated and drowning in debt, on the verge of moving into her parent’s basement....

Your Resident Narcissistic Misogynist Rape-Culture Apologist

Page 60

Hillary staggers to the crying girl, stabs the dagger into her stomach under her sternum, slits her open to the top of her hairless mons. The smell of blood and shit fills the air as the girl gurgles and dies. Hillary casually tosses the knife aside and plunges both...

Page 44

You walk quickly back down the hallway and slip into the breakroom. To look like you belong there, you open the fridge. There is nothing but plain seltzer water. You can hear someone coming, so you take a can and then check the freezer. Nothing but bottles of vodka....

Page 45

“You look good. I always did like myself a skinny white boy,” she says walking around you, inspecting you. “Yes, ma’am.” “‘Ma’am?’ Aren’t you adorable,” she says, sucking her teeth. “You know what I like about white boys?” she asks. “Not too macho, not too thug to go...

Page 80

The tunnels are dank and the smell vacillates between putrid and rank. The floor is so sticky the ripping sounds from your boots when you walk is deafening. Occasionally there is a side tunnel that has been bricked up or collapsed, rubble spilling out that you have to...

Page 40

The security for the 2nd floor consists of a guard on a stool at the foot of the stairs wearing headphones with his eyes closed, apparently fast asleep. You creep past him and climb the stairs quickly and quietly. The din of chattering interns dies away as you go up,...

Page 15

A very taciturn Secret Service agent drives you to the abandoned Postal Service sorting facility. He stops the Ford Expedition at the chained up gate, leaving the SUV running, headlights on. He opens the back door for you; there is no handle on the inside. “Please...

Page 10

“No?” she screams. “You’re turning me down?!?” “I just, the President is just, like, right there,” you stammer, pointing at the bathroom. She moves closer and hisses, “Flyover faggot!” and swipes at your face with vicious salon nails, burning lines across your cheek...

Page 41

You open the door a crack and peer in. The office is dim, just the mellow light of a lamp off to the side. You open the door wider and step in, quietly closing the door behind you. “OMG. You’re so right!” you hear a woman voice say. You realize her chair is turned...

Page 50

You skulk around the edges of the intern and press pods swarming around each other like eels mating, looking for a way into the basement. The stairs present a blank concrete slab on the ground floor. The elevators are mobbed with people going to the roof to vape or...

Page 5

“I knew we could count on you, Kyle.” The President gets up and begins pacing back and forth behind his desk. “Our intelligence resources have narrowed the location of the ballots to three places here in Washington. “Location One is an abandoned Post Office sorting...

Page 35

A very taciturn Secret Service agent drives you to the Democratic National Convention headquarters and parks a number of blocks away. “C’mon, kid,” he says as he gets out of the car, “I got everything you need in the back.” You follow him around and he begins handing...

Page 46

“Come back, young man, come back!” Kamala calls after you but you are running, feet slapping on the carpet. “Guards! Seize him!” she yells as you make it to the elevators. You push the down button frantically. “Guards?” she calls. “Where are my goddamn guards?!?” You...