Go F— Yourself San Diego?

by | Aug 29, 2026 | Beer, Food & Drink, Pastimes, Sports | 70 comments

I’m sure there were more substantive things for me to get drunk and read about but I’ve had a hell of a week. So its the obligatory baseball post for the year,

This is my reviews of Half Acre Ridge Tree Dark Lager:

In the midst of a playoff race the Diamondbacks hosted the Cubs this week turning Chase Field into yet another home game for the road team. The only team that does this with more regularity of course, is the Dodgers.

At any rate, I want to make something clear since this was all over my social media feed. The Baseball Balk Rule is…complicated:

As a general rule, a balk in baseball is any action made by the pitcher that blatantly deceives a base runner, usually while the pitcher is in contact with the pitching rubber. However, the MLB has defined 13 ways a pitcher can balk.

As a general rule the pitchers back foot cannot come off the rubber once he begins his pitching delivery which is often determined by when the front foot stepping towards home plate after he sets. With that in mind I am going to link the play in question and allow you determine that for yourself…

Nah not really. Yes Cubs fans—its a balk. The fun part was how quickly this followed the familiar pattern:

  • Its not a balk
  • Even if it was a balk it didn’t matter since the game would result in a loss of 2-1 instead of 2-0
  • It’s definitely a balk, but Pete Crow Armstrong is racist being a dick by noticing

Unfortunately, it died out before the Atlantic Article describing the racist history of the balk rule. Likely because of this delightful sound byte:

He went Ron Burgundy.

What kind of dark lager is this? There are really only three kinds: Bock, Schwartzbier, and sometimes Rauchbier. In this case its more of a Schwartzbier in my opinion. Its not bad. Not great but you know, okay. You know, you gotta drink one beer at a time. I’m just happy to be drinking beer, and hope I can help the club. Just give it your best shot, and the good lord willing, things will work out. Half Acre Ridge Tree Dark Lager: 3.4/5

About The Author

mexican sharpshooter

mexican sharpshooter

WARNING: Glibertarians.com contains chemicals known to the State of California to cause cancer and birth defects or other reproductive harm. https://youtu.be/qiAyX9q4GIQ?t=2m22s

70 Comments

  1. The Late P Brooks

    An actual “inside baseball” post about baseball.

    • rhywun

      Baseball novice. I’d never heard of that term or the rules around it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

      • Gender Traitor

        Next up: the infield fly rule.

      • rhywun

        Beats me.

      • Gender Traitor

        Yeah, I’ve had partial season tickets to a minor league team for years, and I can never remember how that one works.

      • Michael Malaise

        Batter automatically out on an infield pop up that can be reasonably caught by a fielder.

        Runners on first and second base, or the bases loaded.The hit must be a fair fly ball, not a sharp line drive or a bunt.

        It stops the defense from intentionally dropping a pop-up to turn an easy double or triple play as players come off the bases.

      • Gender Traitor

        I’ll try to remember that long enough to get through our last two games of the regular season and however many playoff games our team gets through.

      • Trigger Hippie

        Can of Corn!

      • Nephilium

        Michael:

        The infield fly rule came up in a Bananaball game last night. The fly was dropped, and turned into a double play, as the runner on first either didn’t hear or ignored the infield fly call and took off.

      • Rat on a train

        Then there is the dropped strike out rule. If a third strike is not caught and, first base is empty or there are two outs, the pitcher is awarded a strike out but the batter is not out and becomes a runner.

  2. Sensei

    “The problem is all inside your motion,”
    Said the umpire to the kid.
    “I’d like to help you understand
    Exactly what you did.

    You don’t need to study
    Every page of every rule,
    There are thirteen little balks
    That can make a pitcher look a fool.”

    I said, “It really isn’t easy
    To remember every one.”
    He said, “Just listen carefully,
    And I’ll tell you how it’s done.”

    There must be thirteen ways to balk a runner,
    Thirteen ways to balk a runner.

    Just start then stop, Pop,
    Fake first, Curt,
    Throw with no step, Pep,
    Settle down.

    Throw to no base, Chase,
    Quick-pitch, Mitch,
    Don’t face the plate, Nate,
    Look around.

    Motion off rubber, Hubber,
    Delay the game, Wayne,
    Stand there with no ball, Paul,
    Settle down.

    Fake a pitch, Rich,
    Split the hands, Dan,
    Let the ball just slip, Chip,
    Look around.

    The catcher ain’t there, Blair,
    Skip the stop, Hop,
    Hear the umpire call,
    And you’re done.

    The next inning I was trying
    To remember every name.
    The runner took a bigger lead,
    The crowd began to aim

    A thousand bits of advice
    Right at my nervous head.
    The pitching coach walked slowly out
    And this is what he said:

    “There must be thirteen ways to balk a runner,
    Thirteen ways to balk a runner.”

    Just start then stop, Pop,
    Fake first, Curt,
    Throw with no step, Pep,
    Settle down.

    Throw to no base, Chase,
    Quick-pitch, Mitch,
    Don’t face the plate, Nate,
    Look around.

    Motion off rubber, Hubber,
    Delay the game, Wayne,
    Stand there with no ball, Paul,
    Settle down.

    Fake a pitch, Rich,
    Split the hands, Dan,
    Let the ball just slip, Chip,
    Look around.

    The catcher ain’t there, Blair,
    Skip the stop, Hop,
    Hear the umpire call,
    And you’re done.

    Well I finally learned the lesson
    After all those extra bases.
    The rule’s not there to trick you,
    It’s to keep things in their places.

    And every time I toe the rubber
    With a runner taking lead,
    I hear that old familiar list
    Repeated when I need:

    There must be thirteen ways to balk a runner,
    Thirteen ways to balk a runner.

    Just start then stop, Pop,
    Fake first, Curt,
    Throw with no step, Pep,
    Settle down.

    Throw to no base, Chase,
    Quick-pitch, Mitch,
    Don’t face the plate, Nate,
    Look around.

    Motion off rubber, Hubber,
    Delay the game, Wayne,
    Stand there with no ball, Paul,
    Settle down.

    Fake a pitch, Rich,
    Split the hands, Dan,
    Let the ball just slip, Chip,
    Look around.

    The catcher ain’t there, Blair,
    Skip the stop, Hop,
    Hear the umpire call,
    And you’re done.

    “Balk!”

    – Paul ChatGPT Simon

    • creech

      If you enlarge the size of the bases and let runners wear sliding gloves to add inches to their reach, then just do away with the balk rules.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      👏 Golf 👏 Clap 👏

  3. PieInTheSky

    determine that for yourself…

    yeah neah its base ball

    • PieInTheSky

      refs are blind anyways regardless of sport

  4. Evan from Evansville

    Fuck the Diamondbacks. (I normally quite ‘enjoy’ them, given their history and the 2001 WS. Craig Counsell, now the Cubs manager, played a pivotal role in that Game 7. He also did in Game 7 of the 1997 WS.) But not this week. We shoulda taken that last game, cuz, YES, it WAS a balk. With PCA on third in a crucial moment.

    It’s been a hard week for the Cubs! Several walk-off losses the last few games. Lost 2/3 when our starters gave up 1 run over ~21 innings. When ya are actually *invested* in the team, through time and knowledge, the 162 game season is… well… a season. Many arcs to follow, and I don’t care if you’re the best team in the league, you’re *still* gonna lose 60 games. Losing ONLY 60 is a tremendous accomplishment.

    Yesterday against the Reds? I left early, when we were up 3-0, to go to the 6yo’s karate ‘graduation.’ Well. That turned into an exciting game, a strong comeback and fight, and I’m ‘glad’ I didn’t watch how that one ended. Yeesh.

    PCA’s the most exciting player in the sport, and without Ohtani hitting *and* pitching, is likely(?) to with the MVP. He’s learned patience this year, and how to hit lefties. We were wise to sign him for a big extension. Well, two more against the Reds before we play seven against the Brewers in the next two weeks. I don’t think we can win the Division, though it’s certainly possible if we roll against them, but we’re still the favorites for the Top Wild Card.

    Best baseball bit: Unlike other team sports, excepting(?) cricket, it’s the only sport where each player has *time* to reflect on what’s happening. It’s not just action/reaction. You can fret over your stupidity of swinging or NOT swinging, or other ways ya fucked up. You get a chance to see the players’ personalities as *people* rather than just players. How they ’emotionally’ react to how they’re performing.

    “Ah, soon that mighty apparatus will burst forth with its precious fluid. Almost sexual, isn’t it, Smithers?”
    “Eh…”

    • SarumanTheWoefullyIgnorant

      “our starters gave up 1 run over ~21 innings”

      Translation: Your middle and late relief suck at holding leads.

      Back in the day (70’s and before) a starter who didn’t finish a game was considered a loser or a pussy. Losers and pussies were relegated to the bullpen and only came in for mop-duty or to replace an injured pitcher. You had the occasional Jim Konstanty or Elroy Face who were middle and late-inning shut-down artists, but closers really didn’t become a thing until the late 70’s. The number of innings thrown by starters over the course of a season today would have been sneered at by the oldsters of yesteryear.

      Old man stops yelling at cloud.

      • Evan from Evansville

        This young man shakes his hand at the clouds in solidarity.

      • creech

        Here’s something you’ll never see again.HOF and Phillies star Robin Roberts won 286 games in his career, while tossing 305 complete games.

      • whiz

        Also Warren Spahn, 363 W, 382 CG. The only people after them to do it were Bob Gibson (251 W, 255 CG) and Juan Marichal (243 W, 244 CG).

        116 pitchers whose careers started 1901 or after have done it, only about 50 who started after the dead ball era.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      We shoulda taken that last game, cuz, YES, it WAS a balk. With PCA on third in a crucial moment.

      Yeah, well…maybe next time. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    • Michael Malaise

      I fucking hate these things now because it’s so clear they are fake AF. The guy is a terrible actor.

      • PieInTheSky

        I occasionally watch mostly to see how much I get

  5. Brochettaward

    People on the right really seem to be sleeping on what’s happening with the left. More laughter and finger pointing at the Democratic socialist shit than actually observing that they are in the midst of a rebranding and shifting away from the boomer establishment coalition that has defined the party and rigged the game against the will of the base for so long now.

    The left doesn’t ever really admit it was wrong or take a step back. It takes the same bullshit voters learned to hate and repackages it into something that is seemingly more palpable at first.

    A strong right wing presidency would make this kind of meaningless. I don’t think most average Americans are running to vote for a commie rat fuck (whoever the fuck actually does come out of what will be a crowded field for the Dems in 2028). I do know that you are deluding yourself if you think the GOP is going to be running on anything but fumes when Trump is finally shown the door and his time is up.

    JD Vance is going to get trounced. He’s an empty suit who stands for nothing and he’s going to be tied to a situation that only seems to be getting worse led by a president who cares more about foreign adventurism despite his claims to put America first. Not a new observation. Not much has changed or improved for anyone in Trump 2.0.

    Who the fuck else is going to come out of the GOP primary which is going to be dominated by MAGA land? Little Marco? The pendulum naturally swings in American politics and it takes a kind of ascendant political situation for one side to keep it going when a president steps aside. The VP waiting in the wings shit really doesn’t work that often historically.

    AOC is kind of being put forward by the same outlets that have gotten it wrong for so long, but I don’t see it. She’s a vacuous bimbo. A walking talking gaffe machine.

    Only thing I’m confident in is that a resurgent and unrestrained left wing going hard on socialism in terms of more than just rhetoric should put the fear of god in you.

    Anyone opposed to this shit needs to wake the fuck up. Woke 2.0 is ridiculous to anyone with a brain, but most voters don’t have that. In lack of better options, they will totally jump on board believing that the young commies of the left have learned their lesson and may be ready for real power.

    • R C Dean

      Who the fuck else is going to come out of the GOP primary

      Ron DeSantis: tanned, rested, and ready!

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        Nixon II: Florida Boogaloo!

      • mexican sharpshooter

        What’s ¡Jeb! Up to these days?

      • Threedoor

        My mother had the Nixon T Shirt.

    • PieInTheSky

      JD Vance is going to get trounced. He’s an empty suit who stands for nothing – the internet tells me he is a postliberal and his fans say he is a common good conservative who will save America from the USD reserve status.

      • Brochettaward

        4-8 years, at least for the presidency*

        I don’t know who these people are who actually shift between the parties, but they apparently exist in some numbers.

        Rare presidents extend the cycle somewhat. Guys who prioritize Israel’s defense over American taxpayers getting fucked every time they go to fill up on gas don’t.

      • rhywun

        I don’t know who these people are who actually shift between the parties, but they apparently exist in some numbers.

        My mom was one. She voted for Carter, then Reagan. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

        But I suspect it was more common in those days.

      • Brochettaward

        The parties weren’t that drastically apart in that time period. The Cold War and the progressive era led the parties to kind of cluster together in a gooey center where there was no shit bipartisanship.

        You will probably never see a president as popular as Reagan or Nixon again in your lifetime. It’s not even conceivable even if they knock shit out of the park in every way and the country is booming (realistically, a legit real war may be the most likely scenario – people just don’t want to see power change hands in the midst of WW3).

      • mexican sharpshooter

        I don’t know who these people are who actually shift between the parties, but they apparently exist in some numbers

        My sister actually was one of those weirdos that went Ducey + Sinema in 2018.

    • Michael Malaise

      JD getting trounced would be quite the upset considering the current dem disarray and fractured. He’s going to be shown the red carpet after Trump leaves and will have a 1.2 billion dollar war chest. He will run with Rubio, who will not challenge him to a primary. There will be an anti-MAGA candidate who will struggle to gain support, and a few fringe primary challengers who won’t matter. You may not like JD, or believe he’s weak or an empty suit, but you forget the momentum he will have. Iran will be an afterthought by 2028.

      Now, I still think any nationwide is close just by the “vote for my team only” numbers but I don’t see a Dem challenger that works right now. That could change. Shapiro would be a smarter choice than what the Dems have been putting up but he’s (((you know))) and that won’t go over with the DSA ascendancy (no matter how small it is — the activists are allows the loudest voices in the Dem party) The Obama/Clinton/DNC wing has lost its touch with how they bungled Biden/Harris. Newsom has a lot of baggage and AOC will try to run a DSA-lite campaign. Maybe Andy Beshear will be the middle of the road guy but can a guy from Kentucky win it all?

      • Michael Malaise

        I swear I was not drunk when I wrote this but I wish I were.

      • dbleagle

        All good points but history is stacked against JDV. Since Martin Van Buren (POTUS #8) Bush the Elder is the only VP directly elected to POTUS while serving as the VPOTUS. Unlike Bush, JD won’t be following a popular two term president on the cusp of the collapse of the USSR.

      • rhywun

        heh Seems like a reasonable analysis.

        I do think Vance will prove to be a more palatable choice nationally than whoever the left pukes up. The few star Dems today who aren’t commies have publicly sided with commies like that Abdul guy. The stink is all over the party.

      • J. Frank Parnell

        I don’t see a Dem challenger that works right now.

        It’ll probably be Whitmer, since she’s got some name recognition from her heroic efforts to keep her state safe during Covid, she’s got street cred from that plot by crazy right-wingers to kidnap her, and anyways all her opponents just hate strong womyn.

        Running mate will be the highest-ranking male DSA or DSA-adjacent POC they can find.

      • dbleagle

        For NYC’s sake, may that DSA affirmative action pick be Mamidami.

        I think in that case even JDV could pull out the upset.

  6. R C Dean

    From the dedthred:

    (state law already prohibits adding new oil and gas infrastructure in California waters that could enable offshore drilling in federal waters).

    I don’t see how that can possibly survive a Commerce Clause challenge.

    • rhywun

      California and friends really are determined to make life as expensive and miserable as possible for the non-elites.

      • ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

        Think of the children environment!

  7. ZWAK, doktor of BRAIN SCIENCE!

    I did not see a balk, but I did see a bunch of little bitches.

    Also, did not see any racists, other that the little bitches in the media.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      MLB should bring back racist broadcasters.

    • PieInTheSky

      those sunglasses look lame

      • Sean

        Me-ow!

      • Ted S.

        I broke my nose when I was a kid. Glasses don’t fit me properly.

    • (((Jarflax

      You should have been there to comfort that poor cat!

    • R.J.

      Nice. Been grocery shopping and cleaning. Far less exciting.

  8. Threedoor

    Hit the ball
    Touch em all
    A moment in the sun.

    Bout all the baseball rules I know.

  9. The Late P Brooks

    I don’t see how that can possibly survive a Commerce Clause challenge.

    What about that supremacy thingie? How does the state of California overrule the feds?

    • Trigger Hippie

      Looks like the usual First Peoples grievance mongers already beat them to it.

    • Nephilium

      I wonder if the IndiansGuardians have abandoned the Wahoo mark yet. I know when they were the Indians, they still sold Wahoo garb at the team shop at the stadium to keep the mark active. I was entertained by some of the items that had Wahoo… such as the shirt the girlfriend got with Mickey Mouse wearing a Wahoo, and a Wahoo on the shirt.

  10. The Late P Brooks

    Reviving harmful imagery—that has been proven to harm Native youth—for nostalgia and profit only perpetuates the stereotypes Native Peoples have spent decades demanding be left behind.

    Poor papooses.

    • dbleagle

      If they are so weak and pussified then their native cultures deserve to die out.

    • Chipping Pioneer

      that has been proven to harm Native youth

      He stated without evidence…

    • rhywun

      logo retired for racism

      lol FFS

    • Chipping Pioneer

      Huh … you can still buy Chief Wahoo hats online.