How North Florida Boys Become Men

How North Florida Boys Become Men

Sorry, guys, work and family precluded an original story in this slot, but I did want to relate the true story of what a former coworker of mine in Tallahassee called "The Redneck Bar Mitzvah". Just south of Tallahassee lies one of the largest by volume natural...

How North Florida Boys Become Men

Wednesday Afternoon Liinks

Happy Hump Day, everybody. Feel more like I'm taking than giving on this particular one. But hey, sometimes you're STEVE SMITH, other days, the hiker. We're going to get straight to the links because, well, Mrs. L told me I need to go to the store. So we can attribute...

Brett set out to find America, the real America, the America of strip malls and serial killers, of butthole waxing and kelp smoothies, of cocaine and maggots. He sought it in the most American part of America—Florida: swamp gas and fever dreams, where love arrives on a rickety boat and leaves when it doesn't have the money for its fourth abortion. Oh, where has Brett gone? He’s drinking at the neck of America’s wang, chewing its foreskin and working its shaft. Brett is becoming legend. Brett can never die. Brett can never die. Brett is America, facedown in his own patriotic puke: the red his blood, the white his stomach lining, and the cold, cold blue his gas station slushie, spiked with coconut rum and tetracycline.

Wednesday Afternoon Links

Taking my older boy to the Ninja Gym. All of the female trainers look like gymnasts, so I’m enthusiastic about taking my turn on this parenting assignment.

Thursday Afternoon Links

Sorry about yesterday folks. SP has graciously allowed me live and even let me get away (this time) with a viewing of her rusty tin can lid collection. It looks like the picture, but with a lot more tetanus and jagged edges.