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PART II
ELEVATOR TO THE GALLOWS

61

“THANK YOU FOR dinner, Marina,” Mr. Carville said, politely patting the corner of his mouth with his napkin. “It was delicious, as usual.”

Marina blushed with a pleased smile. “Thank you.”

Her tutor’s brow wrinkled. “There is something I need to ask because I care about you and I’m concerned, as any decent man would be, and I hope I am not stepping on any toes, but … Does your husband treat you well?”

The question shocked her. “Oh, yes.”

“Well, I doubt you would tell me if he didn’t. Good women don’t speak ill of their men. But I am hoping that you understand, if he is cruel to you, that you can come to me.”

Marina blinked, confused. “I … didn’t, but … thank you? Do I seem unhappy to you?” she asked worriedly.

“No, but you don’t seem happy, either.”

“I don’t want to be happy,” she blurted, then wondered where that came from.

He looked shocked. “Why not?”

“I don’t want to be unhappy, either. You see, I had never been happy before I met Trey, but I didn’t know it. Then I was. Then I was heartbroken. Now I just want to be content, and I am. Happiness brings unhappiness behind it like a train and I would rather not be happy if it means I will then be unhappy.”

Mr. Carville thought about that for a moment, then nodded slowly. “Then, if you are ever unhappy, please tell me.”

“But what would you do?”

“Take you away from here to somewhere safe.” Marina’s mouth dropped open. “From the Machine,” he added hurriedly. “I do believe your husband is kind to you—” He looked around and gestured to the book on the table, which they had been discussing. “—but he runs with dangerous people, you see.”

“Uh, oh. Oh, yes. But Boss Tom would never let anything happen to me.”

“Boss Tom made—”

Marina waited for him to finish the sentence, but he flushed and looked away instead. “You know about the bet,” she murmured, arising to take their plates to the sink.

“Well. Yes. I … was curious why you couldn’t go to school this fall.”

“I see. Did you also know I was drugged?” He hemmed and hawed a little. “Yes, you had to have, because you’re here alone with a pregnant sixteen-year-old not passing judgment and offering to rescue me. Trey put it all over town what he’d do when he found out who did it.”

“Are you sure he didn’t?”

Considering how he felt about being indecent with her, she was absolutely certain and nodded firmly. “Did he threaten you if you were untoward with me?”

“Why, no,” he said, his tone confused. “I am not that sort of man.”

“All right.” Satisfied, she glanced at the clock and gasped. “Oh my goodness! You’re going to be late for your singing practice!”

He looked at the clock then and scrambled for his coat, hat, and briefcase. “Thank you again for dinner, Marina!” he called on his way out the front door.

“You’re welcome,” Marina muttered at the sink.

Why did everyone want her to hate Trey? It was as if the more people said it, the more she wanted to be with him, but that made no sense. Nothing Dot or Mr. Carville said was untrue. The possibilities were exactly what they both said. But she sighed and finished the dishes, then fetched her mending.

And what was the first thing she picked up?

Her thumb drifted over the lipstick stains on Trey’s shirt, the collar, the shoulders, the placket. She wasn’t sure how lipstick would come to be on his chest, but there it was along with some blood. That, too, was frequent. She threw that down and picked out another one. More lipstick.

Marina didn’t want to be indecent with her husband, although she was willing to because he was her husband, but she didn’t want him to be indecent with anybody else, either. She couldn’t imagine having his … body … inside her after it had been inside someone else. It made it even more filthy than it already seemed.

All that talk about best pals and skillets and how it was supposed to be that way for best pals who were married … She had grown up with a prime example of how men found whatever their wives weren’t giving them, going out comforting female parishioners, and Mother looking on because she had her own dirty little secret.

Chore or whore.

She didn’t know what to do. If she confronted him, he would once again demand she participate as if she were enjoying herself even though she didn’t know how, and he would wake up seeing her as loose as whoever he was being indecent with at work.

He spent most of his time in a den of iniquity, although Marina really had no idea what that looked like. She wanted to see it, to understand, but she didn’t want to go there and be tainted with the filth Trey came home stinking of. She also didn’t know how she’d go there and not be caught.

He had given her everything she could have dreamed of and more, but only two rules. He had given her his word he would not be indecent with anyone else, but here was the evidence in front of her.

If he could break his word, why shouldn’t she?

61

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