A | B | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14A | 14B | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30A | 30B | 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | 36 | 37 | 38 | 39 | 40 | 41A | 41B | 42 | 43 | 44
PART II
MAY, 1780
PALACE OF WESTMINSTER
LONDON, ENGLAND
“IT’S DONE,” Admiral Lord Hylton said tightly, staring over Elliott’s head, out the window of his Parliamentary offices to the sun-drenched May day. “I was fortunate in Covarrubias. I think he will take good care of her.”
Elliott swept off his ceremonial wig and opened his scarlet robes before dropping onto a sofa and putting his feet up. He had been standing all morning, bellowing at his fellow nobles in the Lords’ chamber. “But he’s taking her to Spain. How will you know?”
The admiral focused square on Elliott and sneered. “Do you think I would make this arrangement without ensuring I did the right thing?”
Ah. Of course he wouldn’t. Elliott nodded approvingly.
“But now that that is finished, I must attend to another problem.” He took a sip of brandy and savored it. “A man claiming to have been on Captain Fury’s ship when she blew the blockade in Chesapeake contacted Rathbone ten days ago.” Elliott looked at him questioningly. “You know the blockade wherein—”
“I heard something of it,” Elliott murmured, trying not to smile at the memory. “I will assume, because we’re discussing it, that he has valid information.”
“We think. Since Rathbone can place Fury by sight and he thought the man yet another opportunist, he bid the man write a report and submit it the following day.”
“What did it say?”
Hylton’s jaw ground. “There is no report. He was found dead the next day and not a scrap of foolscap in his room.”
“That’s convenient,” Elliott drawled, willing himself not to laugh and shifting in his chair in an effort to disguise his burgeoning cockstand. “Any clues?”
“He had a knife hole in his forehead,” Hylton said dryly. “Thus we can safely conclude he did not die of natural causes. We believe it to be Fury or one of her men. We also believe they were awaiting his arrival to dispose of him. He had only just got into port the day before he reported to Rathbone. Since Rathbone has interviewed every person in his household—most of whom have been there for years—but turned up nothing, he has concluded the timing of the man’s murder to be a coincidence.”
Coincidence. God, how Elliott ached to have her underneath him again. “I was cashiered and you’ve been a rather lax correspondent since I was acquitted. Why are you telling me this?”
The admiral released a heavy sigh and massaged the bridge of his nose. “Commander, I know that you have served this country well and faithfully for the last score years, and the king is very pleased with your efforts to keep the north coast free of smugglers. Not only that, but he is pleased with how well Tavendish Grange is doing and your stance on the American rebellion. But I am coming to you for help. We must find this woman. She is a wily adversary, and it would not do to underestimate her. She has outrun the rear-admiral twice and vanquished him once now, and that is not a simple undertaking.”
Elliott was ecstatic. He could not have planned this better. “You want her alive, I presume.”
“Most assuredly. ’Tis rumored she is Judas’s lover.” Elliott drew his brows together in feigned confusion, which prompted Hylton to explain. “We have had a large number of our ships go missing. We had heard rumors of a Captain Judas and his ship, the Silver Shilling, who had set about bedeviling the Navy, but thought they were sailors’ tales of ghost ships and demon-bound crews and all manner of magical thinking. But according to Rathbone’s report, he does exist and flies a Jolly Roger of a hanged man.”
“That smacks of prophecy.”
“We can only hope. He came out of nowhere and covered the privateer fleet’s escape out to sea after Fury and the Hollander cleared the way. Rathbone believes that were it not for him, they could have sunk the Americans, even so handicapped. In any event, Judas somehow acquired Fury’s figurehead and the dead man did state that the two of them are lovers, which confirms he does, indeed, exist.”
“And you want her to give over her lover.”
Hylton grimaced. “We want her in any event—any privateer we capture is one fewer to worry about. But yes, she is now more valuable to us for that.”
Elliott sat silent for long moments in contemplation. “If they are lovers working together, what makes you think she will give up his name?”
Hylton shrugged. “There are ways. We also hope to get word to Judas that she’s been captured. He may come for her.”
It was true: Judas would come for Fury every chance he got. “Where would you have me look? Spying is not my forté.”
“We believe she may have connections in the haute ton, for she seems to be able to anticipate many of our attempts to find her. A well-placed servant, I would think most likely. Since you are here specifically to find a countess, you will be attending all the events of the season. Thus, you are in the perfect position to watch for any telltale signs of treasonous activity. Footmen, maids, such the like. I would also request you bid your servants to bring you gossip from other houses. Your male staff is comprised entirely of your crews through the years, is it not?”
“Aye.”
“Then I see no reason for them to hesitate at such a request.”
For a certes, they would not hesitate.
“Rathbone has consented to attending the Season with the excuse of squiring his wife about, as two sets of eyes and ears are better than one.”
“Is that why you haven’t sent him back out?”
Hylton drew a deep breath and released it slowly. “I thought it best he attend to his home life. Between his failure to find Sarah and his lost skirmishes to Fury, I believe he needs to … rest.”
“You’re preparing to promote or retire him.”
“Aye. Promote, preferably, but he may balk.” Hylton pursed his lips. “In return for your help and because I badly misjudged the last prospect, I will again attempt to find you a countess.”
Elliott sighed. That. Again. “Admiral—”
He sent Elliott a scathing look. “Commander! His Majesty’s Navy owes you a great debt whether it wants to acknowledge it or not, and I count it God’s grace you didn’t break before you did.”
Oh, yes, Elliott had broken. There was a bevy of British Navy vessels on the ocean floor to attest to the measure of Elliott’s brokenness.
“And then you go on to volunteer your services to rid our waters of contraband. Remarkable, really. I cannot say I would have been so gracious.”
Elliott’s brow wrinkled. “If King George is so happy with me on three, dare I say, critical fronts, I would prefer his gratitude in the form of an official apology rather than via a third party who is requesting a favor.”
“Touché. You’ll not get an official one, but I have good cause to believe you will receive an unofficial one. He requests your presence Tuesday morning.”
That was a shock. Elliott’s mouth hung open a little. “Oh. Ah. Well then.”
“Back to the matter at hand,” Hylton said briskly. “Arabella has a cousin who—”
“Admiral, please. No. Cease this. If I never find a countess, ’twill be of no consequence. I have a brother who can inherit after I die. I have done my duty to the family and the house of Tavendish.”
Hylton stared at him, stunned. “You have! Of course you have, but you must continue. The job isn’t finished.”
“Strictly speaking, having an heir presumptive is adequate.”
“Elliott, you have never, in all the years I have known you, shirked your duty. I have known many men about whom I could say that, but I have known relatively few who went above and beyond, even when it would have been within their right to say, ‘No more.’ I have never known you to quit when the war is nearly won and only one battle remains to fully conquer the enemy. Why are you balking now?”
“I’m in love with a woman who cannot be my countess,” he said flatly.
Hylton shrugged. “Take her as your mistress, then.”
“She is not amenable to any arrangement less than marriage.”
Hylton looked at him as if he were as mad as his daughter. “And so you will fall in love again. Have you suddenly turned romantic? You must have done, because here you are drenched in melancholy. She cannot be the only reason you have come undone.”
Elliott could afford no more revelations. Confessing his love of an unspecified woman was a far cry from explaining his growing yearning for independence.
“That is enough, methinks. She is a remarkable woman, but entirely inappropriate.”
The admiral looked down into his snifter, his mouth twitching in thought. “It is possible to be in love with two women at once,” he drawled, as if Elliott should be able to glean something from it.
He did, but mayhap not what Hylton wanted him to. “Do you love Lady Hylton, then?”
“I do,” he said fervently. “But … things happen and … ”
Elliott’s brows rose when he realized he was not the only man in this room needing to confess tender feelings toward the women in his life. “Admiral, what happened with Lady Hylton and Celia?” he asked bluntly. “Your story appears … weak.”
He cast a rueful smile at the floor. “I wondered when you would get around to that. Your nephew only took the case to solve the conundrum that is my life. Neither he nor your brother bothered to ask me directly.”
This shocked Elliott. “Then … consider yourself asked. The case is closed, decided in your favor, so you lose nothing with the truth.”
“The truth is … shameful. To me and her, and whatever else lies between us, I’ll not dishonor her that way. You may ask me anything you want, but you’ll get few answers.”
Shameful. ’Twas an odd choice of words, but Elliott had expected he would not be forthcoming. “Were your women taken by pirates?”
Hylton remained silent for a moment. “Celia was snatched up by someone who should have cared for her. Lady Hylton was not taken, no. A … rift … suddenly appeared between us, a seemingly irreparable one of her creation. However, in my anger, I … said things. What she did might have been insurmountable, but it might not have been if I had controlled my temper. Simply put, I left her. However, what I said directly caused Celia’s madness and that is the greater sin between us.”
“Well? What did you say?”
“That, I find, I simply cannot repeat without a great deal of pain. I was young, hot-tempered, and leaking hubris. I envy men who have survived their youth with naught but an indiscretion or two.”
Elliott could understand that. There were things he had never spoken of and never would, no matter how pressed.
Hylton laughed suddenly. “You, for instance. I cannot imagine you did anything in your youth that you regret.”
“How can you say that?”
“No, Commander, that you did because you were prideful or cruel or in pain. Think on it. No, now. Right now. Tell me your worst act, the one you will regret until you die. Think.”
He did so.
He was silent for quite awhile as he reeled through his life. But for a few instances he regretted, his naval career was spotless. Likewise, once he had gone on account … he did not regret a single ship he had stripped, then sunk. He did not regret a single bottle of brandy he had brought from France. He did not regret one gold coin he had stolen.
First son to heir. Second son to the military. Third son to the church. There’s an order to things, Son. Do your turn in the Navy and you can come back and manage the estate just as you’ve always wanted to.
“I regret the one thing I should have done, but didn’t.”
Hylton’s eyebrow rose. “We have spoken of this at length. You are not the only man who regrets obeying his father’s wishes, to his detriment or even destruction.” He chuckled sadly. “Who knows? Mayhap even the Lord Christ Jesus himself regrets it.”
Elliott grunted and took a sip of his whisky. “Why did you never search for Marianne and Celia after a space of time? Surely the thought had crossed your mind that all might not be well with them.”
Hylton paused. He was choosing his words carefully, as any good politician should. “It did. Many times. I tell myself that I thought they would be well provided for, so there was no need. Clearly that was not the case. However, I cannot say that that is a lie I tell myself, as I remember feeling certain of it at the time.”
The mystery was even more complex than it had seemed. Hylton would likely tell him no more, but what he had said reaffirmed Elliott’s opinion of him as a fundamentally honorable man who had done regrettable things.
“Lucien claims he knows nothing of this.”
Hylton laughed bitterly. “He was present when it happened. He simply chooses not to remember.” Elliott doubted either Niall or Sandy would believe that. “We are not close. He has always hated me for taking him away from his mother, and I can’t say I blame him. In effect, I lost both my beloved children that accursed day.”
“And you wanted custody of Celia—”
“For the exact reason I have maintained all along.” Elliott opened his mouth, but Hylton cut him off. “That is all I will say.” He chuckled sadly. “Now you may go back to your clever boys and report this interview, which will only whet their appetite.”
“I should say so.”
“They won’t find anything,” Hylton said bitterly. “Only my … wife … knows the full truth of it, and I dare say Marianne has kept her counsel for the same reason I do.”
If you don’t want to wait 2 years to get to the end, you can buy it here.
Pirates!
Wow, 2016 was just the worst. 2016 is when the Ghostbusters reboot came out. Remember how god-aweful that thing was? 2016 was the start of the girl-boss overload. It was when everything officially went to shit.
Why do I tell you this?
Well….
The algorithm sent me a little clip from a film starring Jason Sudeikis and Anne Hathaway. It looked like a cute idea for a rom-com. Anne Hathaway can control a kaiju. I like Jason Sudeikis. This could be good.
So… it starts out with Hathaway as a drunk party-girl who abuses her relationship with her live-in boyfriend and he finally gets fed up with her running around and kicks her out. She goes back to her hometown and lives in her parents old house. Unemployed and at rock bottom, she runs into her old friend Sudeikis. He is surprised and happy to see her. He is super kind to her. They rekindle their old friendship and start something that looks like they have feelings for each other.
But
She has the hots for some other dude who hangs out in the bar that Sudeikis owns. She sneaks around to hook up with him.
Wait…. where is this going?
She is re-capitulating the toxic behavior that ruined her relationship at the start of the movie. Huh… odd choice.
She’s setting herself up for failure… again.
Setting herself up for failure…. yup, if the writing made any sense. But no, this is the her-o’s journey. So instead she gets to girl boss it and no matter how awful she is, she is triumphant because she conquered toxic masculinity.
“Character growth, what’s that?”
That is weird. How does it end?
This is where it gets weird. Out of nowhere, Sudeikis suddenly becomes mean and controlling. Flashbacks to him being kind to her (at some personal risk) when they were kids are amended to show that he actually turned mean when he helped her. So weird.
Suddenly she becomes violent. She repeatedly hits Sudeikis. He finally pushes her back.
What?
Well, I was so confused I asked Grok. Here is what it said::
Sudeikis’s Oscar starts as a charming everyman but evolves into a symbol of entitlement and emotional abuse, using his “colossal” influence to manipulate and punish, critiquing how everyday nice guys can harbor monstrous tendencies when feeling overlooked.
If you have to look up the author’s intent because the character as written made no sense, that’s a sign of a bad work.
So…. she “overlooks” her boyfriend, partying day and night without him, unemployed and letting him pay for her lifestyle…
Then reconnects with an old friend who takes an interest. He offers her a job, gives her a TV for her empty house and later furniture…
She sabbotages that relationship by hooking up with his friend….
And she is the hero…
Here let grok explain it:
Ultimately, it’s about reclaiming agency from chaos; Gloria’s journey from victim to hero underscores that true strength lies in facing one’s “inner monster” rather than externalizing blame.
Now, just to be clear – she is never the victim, unless we are saying she is the victim of her self-destructive tendencies.
Anyway, the movie wraps up by very quickly transforming Sudeikis into an evil and controlling toxic man who is violent, so she murders him in a horribly violent act that is played as heroic.
We fade out to her hookup guy smiling about her victory, I guess? And she is happy at last.
So bizarre.
Who makes a movie about “nice guys who are kind to women harbor secret resentments that will become violent and toxic”?
2016 folks. The root of all evil was sunk deep in 2016.
Then she cheats on hookup guy, and he gets sick of her…
I’d place it further back – like, decades back. But yeah, every few years there is a another poignant highlight.
Who makes a movie about “nice guys who are kind to women harbor secret resentments that will become violent and toxic”?
Lifetime?
And if you want to see Gloria go from victim to hero get the Gena Rowlands movie Gloria. (Not the Sharon Stone remake.) Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem to be on demand on any of the FAST platforms right now.
Same time period was Home Again – A Reese Witherspoon vehicle that may be the most offensive thing I have ever seen. Bored housewife porn about a 40 year old woman who abandons her family for 3 college men. She ends up with all 4 men catering to her at the end. Just a horrific mess.
Released in 2017, to critics acclaim because they love the autobiographical- adjacent writing.
I would guess about 99 times out of a hundred I’d rather re-watch an old favorite than take a slim chance on anything released in the last 20 years or so being any good.
And it would have to be something genre… sci-fi, maybe fantasy. Not rom-com slop.
Which is why we re-watched the original Odd Couple last Saturday night.
I completely agree. But man did John Wick break that mold.
“Throw the lousy cup!”
Sounds like complete slop.
2016 or thereabouts is when studios and directors and actors started blaming the audience for poor box office receipts.
2012 is when it all went to shit.
It’s when almost every children’s book and show went gay.
I ALMOST posted that for movie night. I was really torn so I never did.
Lovely writing on the impenetrable complexity of the human condition.
😍
This is a fun one. I especially like “leaking hubris” as a description. May borrow.
“Thus, you are in the perfect position to watch for any telltale signs of treasonous activity. Footmen, maids, such the like. I would also request you bid your servants to bring you gossip from other houses.” <– (Maids, yes!) Sounds like Roald Dahl's time in Washington. And he was *damn* good at it, apparently. (I'd like to think I'd be, but no chance in hell at that. Well, plenty for fantasy in Bunk Time.)
‘leaking hubris’ is making weird images in my head.
Also, good band name.
Be a great automotive description from a mechanic to an overly smug, ignorant customer about his Saab. I also imagine Colombo saying it.
[Redacted joke cuz I’m learning ‘some’ sense. Onward:] *’Tis* a fantastic band name. Could become a good chorus refrain.
The only conspiracy with Lincoln – the entire Civil War was an elaborate ruse. He used slavery as a distraction to wage a hidden war against Firsters.
Tonio’s having special fun with his bestest of best friends, Mr. Alejandro Kirk.
He loves catchers. So do I, cuz I was one! An All-Star, even.
Fat Boy is becoming my favorite player.
“5’8″” lol
Sure, Jan.
LA hasn’t had a beating like this since Rodney King.
Well, let’s fly you to LA so that when I First all over you, they’ll really have something to talk about.
So on the Derpbook I saw a video of a recruiter lamenting that he couldn’t enlist “undocumented” kids into the military and that there should be some way to help them out. Without commenting on that specifically, no one seemed to mind the guy wearing his uniform in the video and weighing in a hot button political issue. It’s obvious he’s stating his own opinion, though he doesn’t explicitly say so.
Yea, I have little problem with people gaining citizenship if they want to go fight our stupid fucking wars for us, documented or “undocumented.” But I do have a problem with a NCO tasked with hitting quotas for recruits wearing his uniform voicing that opinion and trying to drum up sympathy for the cause.
I’m not a military historian but hasn’t there been an avenue to gain citizenship through service for over a century?
Only applies to people who are here legally in some way but not citizens, not the “undocumented.”
Got it.
It is how my mothers husband became a citizen.
If I remember correctly, 9/11 fast tracked military service to citizenship. Before you had to serve a full enlistment first maybe?
I feel good about having dodged this nonsense.
Hegseth Orders All Troops to Watch His Policy Speech
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/hegseth-orders-all-troops-to-watch-his-policy-speech/ar-AA1P7cUf
***
Hegseth said, “Leaders at every level will ensure all personnel will either watch the full recording or read the official transcript of the speech, and review the policy changes no later than 31 October 2025.”
Hegseth’s memo directs commanders to implement a department-wide cultural shift, using the Trump-era title Department of War. A Pentagon spokesperson said the guidance applies to all armed forces members.
***
This ain’t Simon Says, you silly goose.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s-zBhdbQQM4
zOMG an all-hands meeting.
That never happens. 🙄
The Army just extended exiting soldiers’ stays by 45 days (or potentially longer) due to the government shutdown.
A lot of pissed off folks over that one, I’m sure.
Slow News Day + Embarrassing desperation to try and inject negativity into a nothing story:
CNN Investigates How each of the White House ballroom donors is linked to Trump <– So, donations, not taxpayer $? Uh. Why is this bad? Oh. Trump. Yes, I see.
Debris from the demolition of the White House East Wing used as fill for DC golf course <– So it was put to use? What would've been *appropriate?*
I don’t understand treating the East Wing as a holy site. There is an actual history to it. It would be nice to see CNN actually explore it before pronouncing judgment.
Probably sacred ground to Indigenous Peoples. Everywhere they even took a piss seems to be “sacred” to them.
“A shooting near Howard University has left at least four people shot, police in Washington DC said ..The shooting happened as thousands descended on the campus for homecoming celebrations… Police have not confirmed whether a suspect or suspects were apprehended.”
Um, this is either the 3rd or 4th story this last month about Homecoming shootings. Legitimately, I’m both surprised and absolutely not.
I’m surprised it wasn’t Chicago.
If anything is going to convince me to vote for Gavin Newsom’s gerrymandering law, it’s Tom Steyer telling me how important it is. 🙄
If proportioned properly, Cal. would have 17 GOP congressmen.
They have 9, and Newsom would like to reduce it to 4. Sounds like “fair share,” right?
Steyer Is back?!!? oh jfc I haven’t seen that ad yet, but the idea that Steyer is relevant at all is kinda hilarious. Has he done anything since failing at politics so badly ? What a clown.
Guardian story about Trump sending Feds to monitor CA and NJ elections next month. Of separate import: “Rusty Hicks, chair of the California Democratic party, said: “No amount of election interference by the California Republican party is going to silence the voices of California voters.”
Rusty. Hicks. Reminds me of a high school friend, *the* gayest gay man possible with the gayest name possible(?). He was also on Ru Paul’s Drag Race. (He also took up meth to lose weight and it worked. (Kept it off, too, AFAIK.))
Dusty. Bottoms. No shit, hit legal name. (I’m sure his bottom and his bottoms’ have their share of shit, but for some reason I doubt their ‘dustiness.’
Based on this, Rusty Hicks sounds like a twisted, macabre, swamp-based queer. One with particular kinks.
One-armed MLB pitchers:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jim_Abbott
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pete_Gray
Now that is what I call determination.
Obligatory: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L3yIHmp09jg
(Hey, you OK? [now?])
98.6, reactor online
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QrWAdq8e_uA
My friend Adam has one arm and three aces in disc golf, its doable
Jim Abbott threw a no-hitter with the Yanks.
Clocked in and ready to rock. Rest well, Glibs. Be like Toronto. (Well. Not now. Keep sleeping y’all non-workers.
But later. Keep the sweep going. So clean up after yourselves, ya ingrates. Let that be your daily housekeeping reminder. Sweep good.
Mornin’ all!
Some music to weird out your weekend 🙂
First up, Zinkl, Lucanus Cervus, from Dance Music For Insects. Lucanus cervus is the European stag beetle.
With a completely different vibe, Amy Stroup, In the Shadows.
I heard this first in Lucifer, season 3; it haunts me. Seems appropriate for Severance as well.
Mornin’ BK. Just you and me. Ev is working but we have the day off.
I’m here.
Us oldies wake up early, don’t we? 😉
I’m not *that* old!
Yo ho ho, and a bottle of rum!
Shit, I can’t remember the last time I had rum.
🤪🌇🦜
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dTISF4ZwjMg
🎶🎶
I have a lot of rum in the fridge and on the kitchen shelf.
I haven’t been drinking much of late.
…and hard to catch up…
suh’ fam
whats goody yo
TALL WEEKEND CANS!
GM 🙂