If you are on X and you aren't using this to troll Will Stancil, you need to get on-board the womp womp train. Since stories about me hurting myself are so popular... In 5th grade, a kid on the bus asked me for a piece of notebook paper. The loose piece in my backpack...
There lived in a town most hideousA man by the name of PhineasHis pheromones were so fearsomeThey drew all the ladies, even the winsomeTo accept the root and seed of PhineasWho was a loathsome man, so perfidiousHe left them gibbering and dumbAnd always, always quite...
Kentucky's War on VD: The God That Failed Just a damn fine book. It had been on my insanely long to-read list for a while now. The plot works at breakneck speed and Chesterton wields alliteration like a weapon. You see how it was an inspiration for so many later...
A Truly Terrible True Fake Story
“Ah, I cast indeed my net into their sea, and meant to catch good fish; but always did I draw up the head of some ancient God.”
The Hat and The Hair: Episode 135.5
“It’s eternity in there.”
The me that you know doesn’t come around much
That part of me isn’t here anymore
The Hat and The Hair: Episode 134.6
Their celebrity name can be “Corto” or maybe “Betory.”
The Hat and The Hair: Episode 134.4
Having pried through the strata, analyzed to a hair, counsel’d with
doctors and calculated close,
I find no sweeter fat than sticks to my own bones.
-Walt Whitman
Corn Pop and the Real Bad Dudes
When they said “Repent! Repent!”
I wondered what they meant
“All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.”
― Leo Tolstoy
The Hat and The Hair: Episode 131.6
When you lie dead, no one will remember you
For you have no share in the Muses’ roses.
-Fragment 33, Sapho
The Hat and The Hair: Episode 131.3
Excuses and half-truths and fortified wine
The Hat and The Hair: Episode 130.5
(Joemala: Episode 2)
Want to make some noise, really raise my voice
Yeah, I want to scream and shout
The heart is a wandering stranger.
"I'm so glad he finally agreed to a threesome," he whispered into her ear. "Where did you pack the peanut butter?" THE END Since brevity was the soul of wit this time around, let's look at a different sort of Subaru Horror: The Youtube comments. Quentin Polley...
The Hat and The Hair: Episode 124.5
Another mouth to feed, another belly to fill… but what mouth, what belly?
It’s so tiring to make love to women, it takes forever. I’m too lazy to be a lesbian.
-Camille Paglia
Will you heed the call of the road?
“In politics, shared hatreds are almost always the basis of friendships.”
-Alexis de Tocqueville
“I say to you againe, doe not call up Any that you can not put downe; by the Which I meane, Any that can in Turne call up somewhat against you, whereby your Powerfullest Devices may not be of use.”