No funny stories happening today, alas, though I'm loaded up with them (starting with my war with a bat, who eventually suffered a Shop Vac execution). But I have deadlines for an article looming and have been heads-down writing and (when realizing that I have some...
One of the hazards of working with my kids is that they are always plotting ways to get hold of my fortune. I'm a thousandaire! I was coming up the steps from our cellar to the cafe kitchen, carrying a large box of fenugreek leaves, and just then the door swung open....
Prime and I had a lovely trip to Cleveland. Other than the game we went there to see. Well, SHE had a fine time at the game. Me... well... Anyway, it had it all, perfect weather, flyovers by a cargo plane (Cleveland doesn't rate fighter jets), black female singers...
They were annoyed when I asked for the Sanders section. Y'all may have noticed that WordPress was... having issues. So these Links had to be done last-minute. And show it. What's worse is that I just got back from a no-signal vacation spot following Prime's daughter's...
I'm off shortly to Prime's daughter's wedding. It's a mixed marriage, a Yid marrying the Mackerel-snapper, but it will be a Jewish wedding, albeit (obviously) Reform. My only question remains: at a lesbian Jewish wedding, who breaks the wine glass? I'll be paying...
These guys make some of the best Cabernet Franc and Riesling in the world. My job was to show Pie what we're doing locally for wine. He, being a Commie, brought me eight bottles of top examples of what's being made in Romania ("From each according to his grape, to...
End of the Retarded Waitress saga- she got fired. Spud had the pleasure of doing the deed. Enjoying a visit from Pie while Spud is in town and a few other close friends are dropping by. We're heading to a set of winery appointments today, so I don't have time to do...
And I can't even spell Gabriel. I'm blowing off work today to meet up with Prime at our mutual favorite spot. And it's an odd sort of amusement in a place with a much younger demographic to see the looks we get as the geriatric couple being all super-affectionate....
Retarded Customer: “How much is a bowl of soup?”WebDom: “$7 and it comes with pita”Retarded Customer: “How much is a bowl of soup?”WebDom: “$7”Retarded Customer: “No. HOW MUCH?”WebDom: “The size?”Retarded Customer: “Yes.”WebDom: “It’s a bowl, so about 24...
Freshman, I mean "First Year," Orientation this week. Regardless of major, they're required to sign up for Progressive Indoctrination during their first two semesters (not a joke, they just call it something more anodyne). And a classical music festival has begun,...
Yes, more stories of retardation. Retarded Waitress: Our sparkling water, is it carbonated? Retarded Waitress: The customer wants a hamburger but with the peppers on the side.Me: The hamburgers don't come with peppers. I think they likely said pickles.Retarded...
In the way she does best, Prime hit me up with a seemingly simple but profound question. I tell her stories of the people here, like this doozy from the café yesterday: "Is there dairy in the cream of asparagus soup?"“Yes, there is dairy in it. I’m so sorry, I’ll make...
One of the few things he was wrong about. He WAS a great man. I have nothing to say, because the greatest President in the history of this country already said it, and said it better than any of his successors ever could. Herewith, some excerpts from that marvelous...
The week has been too long, and dealing with tards makes it even longer. One small ray of hope- we just hired a new waitress whom we might be able to ease into the Tard Waitress's hours. She scored major points with me during her training on wine when she asked, "How...
Our retarded staff continues to provide me with material. After our waitress's insistence that she understands everything there is to know about every wine and beer on our list, she's now confident on giving recommendations. Confidence, unfortunately, is not the same...
Heading up to the Great White North for a couple days at Prime's beach cottage on Lake Erie. She has, without any expectation of success, begged me to be polite, not ask people why they have beady eyes and floppy heads, how they feel about becoming America's 52nd...
As much as I complain about the rather dimwitted and entitled customer base we have, I can't say much better for our staff. We do have some excellent people, but we also have... to be generous, tards. Except actual Downs tards are generally super nice, kind, cheerful,...
We have come through the worst of Alumni Reunion Weekend in more or less one piece. I can't speak for our customers- wine sales were amazing. I have to restock nearly everything. We have the last remnants coming through today, but then we pick up all the pieces, sweep...
All the old time Progs are descending on our little village this weekend for the Reunion. It started for me last night with a table full of affluent women in their late 30s demanding to know if the wine we had was organic. And if it had sulfites. And if we maintained...
Falafel is one of those Middle Eastern dishes that everyone claims, everyone has their own version, and everyone uses to demonize the Jews. And it's the equivalent of hamburgers to Israelis, an everyday meal available on every street corner. The Israeli version uses...
Prime texted me, "I have a really good friend you haven't met yet, another doc. We're having drinks and I told her about you. Can you make it to dinner on the 6th?" And then a few quotes which led me to believe that her friend was an Actual Jew and one with a sense of...
I had an old friend come through town this week. We used to frequently travel together in Europe, go camping in California, and hang out in his compound (he did very well in financial engineering) in the great town of Nederland. I even got to see the infamous Dead Guy...
So much fun being on our village Planning Board. To put it into context, they basically act as an HOA for the village, and like most HOAs, they're populated by old biddies with deep busybody instincts. I am the youngest person on the board. Anyway, we had our monthly...
It's been an illuminating experience running a food establishment in the Gulch. Despite the highly educated population who style themselves as worldly and sophisticated, the general food tastes here run close to that of an eight year old boy raised on junk food....
The downside of us changing our business model from a coffee/breakfast café to a dinner/wine bar venue is that my working days are now extended to 12-13 hours. Mostly on my aging feet. Well, that's what the customers seem to want, and twenty bucks is twenty bucks. I'm...